A Lullaby Of My Own
by Jezzyem
Summary: Renesmee knows just 3 facts about her father: First, he's a mind-reading vampire; second, he has another family; third, he crushed Bella's heart. Now she's off to college but an unexpected surprise is in store for her when she meets a certain someone...
1. Chapter 1

**Inspiration for this story came after reading a number of Fanfics. This is my first Fanfic so please review and give me your personal opinion. In later chapters, there is use of alcohol by minors (in American Law) and some violence so please be aware.**

**Hope you enjoy :)**

**:Twilight character names belong to Stephenie Meyer. All characterisations, plot lines, descriptions and additional details belong to the respective author. No copying or reproduction of this work is permitted without personally written authorisation. ©2011 JezzyMillers, [11/08/11]. All rights reserved worldwide.**

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><p>I looked around my small bedroom and smiled. The faded blue walls were bare except for the few nails sticking out of the wall where photos used to hang. The decrepit, oak wardrobe stood at the back now empty; its contents were now packed into the two open boxes sat on my bed. I walked the length of the room to the last remaining, un-packed object there, picked it up and smiled at the distinct memory. It was a photo of me, my mom and my grandpa Charlie.<p>

It was taken five years ago on my fourth birthday. Of course, then I looked ten years old. It was a lovely memory. My mom, Bella, had packed us all an exquisite picnic made up of my favourite human foods, there was too much there considering it was only Grandpa and I who ate it. Looking at the photo now, all our heads close in proximity, I tried to imagine Bella with the same deep chocolate eyes that she once shared with me and Charlie. I'd seen her with dark black eyes before but I tried to envision it now instead of her luminous yellow eyes.

Grandpa knew about us and progressively came to accept it. I'm not sure if he knew the extent of what we were but he knew we we're both different. I wasn't there when he'd been told but I did witness his reaction and his gradual calming. If it wasn't from such a serious matter I would probably have laughed. He was strong- I think that's where my mom get's it from- he never exploded; and if it wasn't for our ability to see more and hear more, I doubt you could have told that he had trouble with the idea of our variation to him. He was fine now and enjoyed having us around even if he did have to keep it secret. No resident of Forks knew that we were here. He jokes about us being his personal, invincible house guards. Charlie had told the town that Bella had decided to move to Florida to attend college there so she could be closer to Renee and when the time came, he claimed that Bella preferred Jacksonville to Forks and opted to stay indefinitely.

As I grew older, I found that human food tasted better; it still wasn't as appetising as blood but less of it tasted atrocious anymore. My accelerated ageing being to slow three years ago and that's when my mom said it was acceptable for me to attend a _real_ high school. Of course, I'd already learnt more and knew more than the average human but I'd not actually experienced any of it and that experience was a need. We'd attended a school in Port Angeles as Bella would be too easily recognised in Forks, besides, we liked the daily trip. As soon as we had graduated I knew that I wanted to experience college too, so, after extensive persuasion, my mom had finally agreed to let me go to The University of Washington in Seattle as it was the nearest university to Forks. It also had a satisfying Science programme, which was what I wanted to study (this time round anyway). I liked all aspects of Science but biology was my favourite because I liked observing human and animal behaviour. It helped me understand them better-understand _me_ better. The only thing that bugged me about Science was "everything has an explanation" because I for certain, could not be explained.

So here I was, packing the final photo into a box, ready to face the next three years of college and living in different surroundings with different people.

"Ness?" Someone called from the doorway. It startled me as I hadn't heard anyone approaching and I was so used to Charlie sounding like an elephant. I immediately realised that it was my mom calling my name.

I turned and saw her expression. She didn't appear sad but it was still visible beneath the dominant emotion on her face. She looked a little peeved and it was obvious why. Although she'd grown used to it, she really didn't like the nickname I'd been given by her best friend and my future mate, Jacob. She'd resolved it by calling me 'Ness' occasionally so that she had some control over what she wanted to call me but she called me Renesmee mostly. I wasn't particularly fussed as long as my name wasn't changed entirely. I liked my long name; I also liked my nickname but I think that was due to the fact it had been Jacob who had named it me. That was our family- me, Bella, Charlie and, I suppose, Jake.

"Yeah?" I replied as I secured both boxes shut.

The reason I'd packed all my things was because I didn't have much to begin with. Because we had to blend in I shared a laptop with my mom along with most of the books and DVD's we owned. Our sports cars were kept in La Push as more people there knew about us so it was less conspicuous. I didn't have all the latest gadgets because I didn't want them; the only gadget I possessed other than the car was the newest model, iPhone. So, my room stored my small personal items: photos, clothes, CD's, sketch books, music books and finally my piano. It wasn't a grand piano. It was a small rectangular structured one made from red oak that sat nicely in the far corner of my room. Unfortunately, I couldn't bring it with me, but Bella had asked the university if their music facilities could be used by students that aren't majoring in that subject. They'd ensured me that I could use all their facilities; however, I would need to find out the time the rooms weren't in use as students of the subject had priority.

Mom was the reason I taught myself to play. She has a CD of composed pianist music she told me was created by my father. I'd listen to the harmonising strings at night to calm me and I fell in love with it. I could easily recognise my favourites' but not by name and my mom didn't know them either. The only name she'd give me for my most favourite was Bella's lullaby- named that because she'd been told that she'd influenced the music. It made her sad to think of it but she quickly got over it. I'd asked her if she had the music to accompany the melody but she said she hadn't and that's when I began to teach myself the songs and make a copy of the notes. I didn't compose much myself as I found inspiration hard to come across but I had managed to create a few tunes for myself which I was pleased with. But it wasn't a future for me, it was a hobby.

My other hobby was sketching. I sketched everything I could. I had four filled sketch books in total and I was halfway through my fifth. Without boasting, they were good. This was why I'd chosen art as my third subject- I wanted to improve and to grasp the ability of sketching every single detail. I admit, my eyesight being better than a normal human and the patience I have is a major part to my talent- I enjoyed it.

I wasn't taking it all with me. I was taking my music books as I only had two, my favourite CD's which I didn't need because they were all stored on my phone anyway, most of my photo's were coming with me to give me some home comforts- I didn't have many to begin with as there were loads scattered around the house itself, but the five frames I had around my room were coming with me. Even though there was a library I was taking my copy of _Romeo and Juliet_ that my mom had bought me one Christmas and my copy of _Pride and Prejudice_- my favourites. Also I was bringing my copy of Lewis Carroll's _Alice in wonderland._ Finally, I was bringing along 3 sketch books: The first was my half full one so that I could complete it whilst I was there, an new one just in case and the first sketch book I'd even owned because it held the most for me. It had sketches of my family including Jake's wolf form, sketches of the house, the forest, La push, the sea, the pack. Everything that reminded me of home was in this book so it would provide tranquillity for me.

My mom's face changed into sadness then, "You almost ready?" she asked, leaning against the door frame.

I turned to survey my empty room before turning back and answering, "I'm ready."

Uncertainty clouded my voice as I looked at my mom. She immediately closed the space and enveloped me in a tight hug. To me it felt tight but with her strength it wouldn't be. She breathed in deeply- her way of making sure she remembered my scent. Human blood didn't bother her because the smell was to similar to my own and the thought of killing a human made her think of Charlie, Jake and all of our friends.

I felt tears well up in my eyes. I was going to miss her so much. Not only was she my mom, but she was my best friend. No one could replace her in my life. We looked the same age but she was a lot more mature than me having adapted her motherly instincts, but she knew when we could mess around. She was everything I could ask for in a mother.

I suppose Jake was also like my best friend but the love I had for him I knew would evolve, it was inevitable. His imprinting on me made our hearts beat for each other. Mom had once given me the explanation he had given her '_When you see her, suddenly it's not the earth holding you here anymore. She does. And nothing matters more than her. And you would do anything for her, be anything for her...you become whatever she needs you to be, whether that's a protector, or a lover, or a friend, or a brother._' And it was true. Jake had been a brother to me, now he was a friend, sooner or later he'd be my lover and we both could see it was going to happen sooner rather than later. And he was always my protector whether I liked that or not. In my mind I'd contemplated a relationship after college. Embarrassingly enough, a bashful Bella had already had _the_ talk with me and asked me to be a responsible person. Even though I looked old enough I promised her that I would officially be sixteen before anything like _that_ happened. I'd be seventeen once I graduated anyway so everything fit together perfectly.

Mom pulled away at that point but kept her palms grasping my shoulders. She stared straight into my eyes which were now blurred due to my tears; a bearable stinging sensation pulsed in them. The white surrounding her golden irises were pink as the venom automatically ran to the small veins of her eyes- a vampire's alternative response to producing tears. So much loved filled her eyes and I couldn't help responding. She was the one person I cared about most, especially after what she'd been through. Admittedly, she doesn't know that I know more about what my father did to her than she'd told me; I'd found out through Jake, but even he didn't tell me everything because he respected my mom too much.

Her hand reached up and lightly grazed my cheek, it took me a second to realise she was wiping a leaking tear. She sighed sharply and composed herself before speaking, "Right, let's get these boxes downstairs and get you on your way."

Her voice was thick with emotion and I knew that she didn't want me to go, but it was a learning curve for me, and I knew I had to do it.

She picked both boxes whilst I carried my rucksack out of the room. I turned to admire the empty space. The bed, wardrobe and desk still occupied their usual spots, but without the bedding, photos and laptop it looked bare and hollow. I knew I'd be back to this same place very soon but it still felt like it was a permanent goodbye. Silly, I know, because it's just a room, yet it'd been my room growing up, made especially for me after I was bought home as a baby. I closed the door and stared at the carving spread across the middle of the wooden door 'Renesmee' decorated with ribbons of daisies and vines. I ran my fingers in the dent softly and smiled before I headed for the stairs.

As I reached the bottom a blinding flash (to human eyes anyway) struck my face accompanied with a small click. It had not been something I was anticipating. I looked to see the cause of the light and saw Charlie stood by the door holding a small camera, eyes bleary, his moustache wet and the sound of small sniffles every other second accompanied his look.

"It's your first photo as a college student." He explained behind the dismay enveloping his sullen voice. I dropped my bag and ran into his embrace. It was strange how the ice cold of my mom, the lukewarm softness of Grandpa, and the burning body of Jacob were equally as comforting to me as each other. I felt the vibrations of his chest as he tried to contain his crying, "It doesn't seem like you can be old enough for college." He muttered as he hugged me.

I giggled slightly, "Technically, I'm only just old enough for high school, let alone college." I pulled back and smiled encouragingly at him, "You'll see me very soon, Gramps; it's not that far away. I'll be visiting every other Sunday as soon as I get my car anyway."

I did have my sports car in La Push but Mom thought I needed something less conspicuous, so Jake was mending an old car for me that I could eventually use.

"Yeah I know." He replied before wiping his eyes and nose with the sleeve of his jacket. Mom re-entered the house then after taking my stuff to Jake's car.

"It's time to go." She declared. Enthusiasm wasn't present at all.

I looked back at Grandpa mournfully, tears welling up in my eyes again. He nodded slightly then stepped aside as a gesture that he'd let me leave his house. I walked and kissed him on the cheek, "I love you, Grandpa." I said quietly.

"Yeah, you too." I know that he meant it even if he hadn't actually said 'I love you too'. Charlie wasn't one to express his emotions as clearly as others.

He followed us out the door and stood under the porch watching us as we made our way to Jake's rabbit- yeah, he still had it. Jake greeted me with a grin as I climbed into the back seat. As my mom and Jake got into the car as well, the engine roared to life and the car crawled out of the driveway. I gave a timid wave to Charlie as the house became smaller in my sight. I could see him waving back and because of my enhanced vision I could still notice his chest wobbling uncontrollably. I rested my head against the window and watched as my last view of the house I loved, disappeared behind the jade green trees of the forest next door.

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><p><strong>Thank you for reading. <strong>

**Reviews are like Grandpa Charlie's hugs **

**Jezzy x**


	2. Chapter 2

**A special thank you to my first reviewer and also a thank you to those of you who have added this story to your alert list already. I really appreciate it! **

**Un beta'd chapter**

**Quick note:**** The italics in this chapter indicate a flashback/ conversation that happened in the past. **

**Also, this is my imagination, I do not attend university and do not know what it's like.**

**Enjoy! ;)**

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><p><strong>:Twilight character names belong to Stephenie Meyer. All characterisations, plot lines, descriptions and additional details belong to the respective author. No copying or reproduction of this work is permitted without personally written authorisation. ©2011 JezzyMillers, [1908/11]. All rights reserved worldwide.**

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><p>We'd arrived at The University of Washington. My mouth was agape as I took in my surroundings. Before I came here I'd found out that the university had more than 500 buildings but looking them now sent my mind swirling; I didn't figure how big the campus actually was.<p>

I barely remembered the three and a half hour journey here as it past in a haze. I was freaking out a bit too much. I remained in the back seat of the car staring out of the window although I couldn't remember one building or historical monument that we'd passed. I only just remember boarding the Bainbridge Island ferry as it was the only time I had to peel myself away from the back seat. I admit the fresh air and the smell of sea water helped me relax a little. Mom had come over to me and tried to make conversation whilst I was lent against the railings. I gave her brief answers as my mind was too preoccupied. The only thing that caught my attention was her arm snake out to try and take my hand. I quickly folded my arms and clenched my fists making it look as though I was shielding myself from the cold. From the corner of my eye I saw her smirk. She saw through me easily and she could see my worry. She just didn't realise how worried I was.

For the rest of the car journey I occupied my previous position of staring out the window. This time I kept my hands clamped in between my knees so that they wouldn't give me away. I had learnt to control my gift but it took an excessive amount of control to do so; every time my emotions ran high it would not work. I knew that as soon as my mom or Jake took my hand, my gift of showing my thoughts would betray me in an instant. Mom knew I was worried but if she saw everything that ran through my head she would bundle me back in the car and forcefully return me home never allowing me to leave again. She wanted that to happen but I need this experience and I wasn't going until it was complete.

I knew how to look after myself and my mom has helped me figure things out. I was really grateful I had her. She's become a vampire the same time as me and she had to figure things out a lot quicker than I did, like her gift for example. Even as a human, nobody with a mental ability could interject her mind, now she was a vampire she was able to expand this and create a shield over people allowing their mind to be protected at the same time. She'd had help with her gift. A vampire named Zafrina trained her and gave Bella the advantage of controlling her power. Zafrina belonged to coven of three: herself, Kachiri and Senna. Zafrina was able to create illusions, so Bella was able to protect herself from it. Zafrina used me as a training device, planting images of being tortured in my head. I didn't mind; I admit it scared me but I knew it was necessary and the love my mother felt for me made her determined. At first, Bella had tried to shout that I was just seeing things before Zafrina shouted, "Use your power, Bella, not your voice!" She then blocked my hearing as well so I was unable to hear anything.

This training proceeded for two months before she managed to shield my mind. Within that time, Zafrina had used Charlie and Jacob as devices as well so that Bella could get the hang of protecting multiple people at a time. Then distance was tested; Mom managed to protect me from five miles away. Kachiri then took over, training Bella how to fight properly; after all, she was still classed as a new born. Kachiri had a lot of experience in that field and it showed. I had participated in the training and knew a few things but after getting thrown into a tree, Jacob became too protective, so I just observed instead. In total, they'd stayed with us for six months; they even stayed to celebrate my first birthday with me. But after that time, both Kachiri and Senna wanted to return south because they could not fulfil what they had originally come here for. I, out of curiosity, asked what that was.

"_We came to visit Carlisle and his family. A visit on our behalf was well overdue." Senna explained to me._

"_Who's Carlisle?" I asked confused. Surely, a coven of human drinking vampires would not want to visit a human?_

"_The leader of the coven your mother was going to join." She answered back. By the sound of her voice she thought that I knew exactly what she was talking about._

_I felt a confused expression grow on my face before watching the Amazonians mirror my look._

"_She doesn't know." My mom called from a far. I turned to see her walking towards us, "and I would appreciate it if you didn't tell _them_ about us when you next come across them." She gave a brief smile after she answered as if to mask the obvious venom drip from her voice._

"_Bella, I apologize, I thought she would have known." Senna replied genuinely._

_Bella dismissed it with a smile, "Don't worry, Senna, it's my fault, I should have mentioned something to her about them." _

_She sat on a rock in the forest close to where we trained and motioned for me to sit too. She smiled at me, "Darling, Carlisle is the leader of a coven that once lived in Forks; the coven your father was part of; your father's family. Zafrina, Kachiri and Senna have known them a long time and came to Forks to visit them, not knowing that they had left. They'd heard of me so came to visit us instead to find out where they went. I, however, do not know." _

I tried to press more into it, but I could not find out anymore. That was the first thing I knew about my father: he had another family somewhere. I'd asked everyone for more information but no one would give me any, not even Charlie. I finally asked Jacob why my mom didn't want me to know anything and didn't want to talk to me about it. That's when I'd learnt what had happened; not in detail, but the main gist of it. My mom became like a breathing corpse- a zombie, until I came along. A nice surprise. Jake had said that if I hadn't of come along, my mother would probably be in that same state. So that was another thing I'd learnt: he'd broke my mother's heart. After that I did not care anymore about finding him; not after what I'd been told.

Senna and Kachiri returned home after that but Zafrina asked to stay a while longer to go through some other stuff. Little did I know that that was with me. Zafrina was the one that helped me control my power. I was young though, so I couldn't control it fully.

_At one point I became tired and used my gift to show my mom. We retreated to the house for something to eat and for some rest when Jake blurted, "How come Nessie's the only one who can get into your mind?"_

_Both Mom and I were shocked, we'd never thought about it before. I could see her worry that her only means of protection was flawed. "My shield has holes." She stated through a whisper._

_Zafrina just shook her head. She was the only one who wasn't fazed by this new information. "It is more likely that she obtains a second power."_

_Bella still stared in shock, "explain." She ordered._

"_Think about it. Renesmee's gift is an interesting twist. Like she's doing the exact opposite of what Ed- her father does." Zafrina corrected herself- I had no idea why but I wasn't entirely interested, "He intrudes people minds; Nessie shares her mind. It could be the same with your gift too- you create a shield; she could penetrate shields."_

_It was a reasonable explanation. But a comment stopped me from worrying about it. Zafrina had said that my father intrudes minds, what could that mean? Intrude means invade; be there without permission. See something there that other people don't want to share. No one shares their secrets-could he see what secrets they keep? No, that sounded to exact to be a gift of our kind. If someone doesn't want to share something they think it instead. That's it!_

"_My father can see what people are thinking?" I asked, interrupting a conversation between my mom and Zafrina._

_Bella forced a smile, "Yes, you're father could read minds." She stated before turning back to Zafrina. _

_That was the final thing I learnt about my father: not only was he a vampire- he was a mind-reading vampire._

The memories came back to me until we reached the university.

I was here now walking along the corridor to my room holding a blue folder and my rucksack. Worst of all I had no idea how I got to this point or where I was. I hadn't been paying attention at all. Mom must have done all the talking, she was charming like that. Everywhere we went people did something for her. That's when I realised we weren't being shown the way by a teacher or member of staff at all; a male student around the age that Bella looked was guiding us there. I smirked and held back laughter. He was smitten! It felt strange to me, having to pretend that Bella was my sister instead of my mom and that Charlie was my dad instead of my grandpa. It was weird, but I'd grown accustom to it.

The dorm was plain and not very big at all. I was staying on-site because I wanted the full experience, I could have opted for my own housing but I didn't want to be a burden; it's not that we don't have the money it's just I didn't want it when I could stay somewhere else. I wasn't sharing with anyone, that's one thing I don't think I could have managed. I didn't want to give myself away and my inhumane habits would do so. Because it was my first time blending into a full human environment full-time, I wanted to take as many precautions as I could. The bed was in the centre of the room with a bedside table on its right. A desk stood by itself against the right wall with a matching stool located underneath. Next to the door and toward the foot of the bed was a chest of drawers accompanied by a small wardrobe at its side. An old television sat on top of the chest of drawers. The walls were a plain, run down, white; the carpet was a dark shade of blue-it also had a noticeable bleach stain by the desk- and the furniture all matched. The wood however, looked cheap and worn out. We walked into the middle of the space and my mom didn't look impressed.

"Are you sure you're ready for this?" Mom asked me still observing the room. I sighed and walked over to the bed, placing my rucksack and the box I was carrying on the mattress. I was thankful that the springs didn't squeak. She took that motion as my answer, "Well, I guess you better unpack then."

With that she placed the box she was carrying on the bed as well and busied herself opening it and placing its contents in suitable places. The box that she was emptying was filled with the photos I'd packed along with my books. I watched her as she sped around, placing the photos in numerous places around the small room that was now mine. Suddenly, she stopped and looked at me, startling me in the process, "I'm not doing this on my own." She stated whilst smiling.

I smiled back at her. I turned and unpacked my rucksack filled with random pieces of clothing. I soon realised that this was all my underwear and toiletries. I took the toiletries into the small room that held a toilet and a sink and realised that it was the only part of the room that had a window. This disappointed me a little as I wanted something to look out of throughout the day. I guess I'd just have to do that in the bathroom instead or find another place where I could happily observe my surroundings. As I expected the showers were communal.

By now everything was unpacked and the room looked a lot more homely now my personal belongings had a home within the four walls. I turned and looked at my mom and Jake stood by the door. If my mom could cry she would be doing so, I could tell by her face and Jake was just too manly to show his reluctance and upset at letting me go. I tried to smile back but it felt more like a grimace and a traitor tear fell down my cheek. Jake bound up to me and took me in his arms and raised me off of the floor. I wrapped my arms around his neck and buried my face between his shoulder and neck and cried a little. He pulled me tighter to his chest. As I calmed down I inhaled his scent to scorch it in my memory. He let me down and I saw the rim of his eyes gleaming red. I reached up to stroke his cheek but as I touched it he lent down and grazed my cheek softly with his lips. The warmth of his lips remained on my cheek even as he left. I smiled at him before he walked out the door. I was left with my mom who looked at me with a smile on her face. She approached me slowly before I jumped into her embrace. I wasn't quite as tall as her- she was still about a head taller than me- but for some reason I was still growing in height slowly. I pressed my head against her chest and cried. I felt her comfortingly stroke my hair and kiss my forehead.

"I'm going to miss you so much, Mom." I said even though my voice was muffled.

"As I'll miss you, Darling." She replied. She held me for a while longer before repeating the movement of pulling away and stroking the tear from my cheek as she had done in my bedroom earlier. I felt her kiss my forehead again before turning around and retrieving another un-opened box.

"This is just something from me." Indicating towards the box in her hand, "It contains all our duplicate DVD'S and some of our favourites, I thought we could plan to watch them at the same time together so it feels as though we're in the same place and connected some days."

I felt a smile form on my face as she continued, "Now, in this box you'll also find a parcel, roughly the same shape as a portfolio folder. Listen," She looked at me sternly, "I don't want you to open it now, or when I leave because you're merely curious. Open it when you feel like opening it for no other reason than you have the time to read through it properly and have a clear mind so that you can understand all perspectives. Okay?" She looked at me inquisitively. I nodded in reply before taking the box out of her hand and placing it on the bed. "It could be a day from now, a week from now or even a month from now. I know you'll open it when the time's right and you'll know when that time comes."

She finally smiled and pulled me into another tight hug before turning and leaving out of the door, closing it behind her. Another single tear fell down my face as I realised I wasn't going to see them for months and that I was now acting independently.

~o0o~

BPOV

I leant back against the door as I heard my baby sniffle knowing I would not see her for a while. I understood why she wished to do this and knowing that we would both be entering this process again in the future, but that didn't make it any less painful for me to walk away from her. I sighed and reluctantly, I walked to meet Jacob as I uncomfortably drew in rapid breaths as a result of my crying. I was leaving my baby alone and I didn't particularly want too. No matter how much I didn't want to admit it she was growing up and she was much mature than some normal human adults that I knew. Speaking of which, one was in my sight waiting for me. Jake smiled at me then wrapped his arm around my shoulders and pulled me towards his car. I know he was trying to comfort me and I was still grateful that he still cared for me this much, "So you gave it her then?" He affirmed, irritated.

I sighed, "Yes" I stated in the same manner.

Jacob scoffed, "Wouldn't it of been easier just to tell her rather than give her a book?" He really didn't like the idea of her knowing.

"She'll understand better and make judgement for herself. I wouldn't have been able to explain properly if I sat her down." I sounded like I was pleading with him.

He didn't work out why it was easier for her to see it rather than hear it. I knew her and how her mind worked. And I knew this was the best way for her to access it for herself.

"Sure, sure." He dismissed it. He wasn't interested in the method behind it because he disliked the subject entirely.

But she had to know, I couldn't hide it from her any longer. She needs to know where she came from. It's time Renesmee knew more about her father.

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><p><strong>Thank you for reading :)<strong>

**Reviews are like Jacob's warm, snuggly (and sexy) embraces!**

**Jezzy x**


	3. Chapter 3

**This is only a short chapter, peeps! For that I am sorry... **

**un beta'd again. I'm on the lookout...**

**Enjoy! ;)**

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><p><strong>:Twilight character names belong to Stephenie Meyer. All characterisations, plot lines, descriptions and additional details belong to the respective author. No copying or reproduction of this work is permitted without personally written authorisation. ©2011 JezzyMillers, [0509/11]. All rights reserved worldwide.**

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><p>I remained concerned for the entire journey home. My mind was contemplating whether I had made the right decision. Should I have told her myself as Jake suggested? Will she understand the meaning of it? Should I have told her at all for that matter? Whether it is in the form of a letter or a vocal explanation. I had her best interests at heart and I knew the questions played on her mind, I'd seen it.<p>

It wasn't long after Zafrina left that her expression would turn into something more that a daydreaming look. I was curious as to what caused her to go into this phase. I'd touched her hand and her thoughts soared threw me bringing with it my own grief, _Carlisle...other family...mind-reading...father...who was he?_ My heart splintered. And upon noticing my pain, my daughter's face crumpled, mirroring me at the thought of causing my hurt.

From then on she knew to keep her thoughts to herself and tried to hide her expression whenever I was around having seen my reaction.

Thinking about that time now I knew that she would understand my side of the story. I hadn't made out that her dad was all bad as I do not want to plant a false seed for her, but I have mentioned the pain his words and his leaving put me through. I couldn't hide that, she'd seen it on my face enough times. This is why I wrote it as I knew the words would flow more freely and my emotions wouldn't bias her over view.

Jake held his arm around me in a comforting gesture the entire journey home, occasionally making small talk all the way. I never really clocked any of the conversation but I was grateful for the gesture. I no longer worried about him comforting me as I knew he loved me like family; a sister and his best friend. He had Renesmee to fall in love with. That thought did worry me and it frequently played on my mind knowing that my daughter and best friend were going to have an inevitable relationship, ugh!

I cringed at the thought.

It didn't bother me as much as it used too. They were good for each other and any other person I wouldn't have trusted. Any other girl would not be good enough for Jacob and any other boy would defiantly not be good enough for my Renesmee.

I never tuned into the small talk until we neared Forks, when something Jake said intrigued me, "You know she really is her mother's daughter."

I looked at him slightly shocked, "Really? How so?"

Jake chuckled and turned to face me not worrying about the road, "Well look at you, you've been sat thinking about god knows what all the way back, you've been biting on your lip so much that I keep thinking you're going to rip off soon, your fists have been clenched in your lap and you've barely said a word or paid attention to our conversation.

This morning your daughter was doing the exact same thing as you are now." He turned back to look out of the windscreen with a smirk on his face. He wasn't smart, that much was obvious, but he was smug enough to think so and it showed now.

I laughed, mostly because of his expression but also because I knew he was right. His face dropped into a frown, "Hey! Stop laughing, I'm right, I know I am!" his hand came off of my shoulder and ruffled my hair.

I suppressed my laugh behind a smile and punched his arm in return.

"Easy, Bells." He said whilst rotating his shoulder to reduce the minor pain it would have caused him. "At least now you're a vamp you can throw a punch" He muttered more quietly.

I was glad the friendship had with Jacob didn't falter after everything. It was still as easy as breathing. So was being a mom, I suppose.

~o0o~

R/N POV

Once my mom and Jake had left and I had stopped myself from crying any longer, I ventured to the small box that lay on my bed, unopened. I was curious as to what my mom had said about a package inside. Seeing my mother's face as she spoke about it made me wonder what was so important about it.

This thought alone piqued my curiosity. I opened the box and found a bulky, yellow envelope slightly smaller than an A4 paper sheet but far too large to be A5 carefully situated on top of everything else. She was right; it did resemble the same shape as a portfolio. On the front, my name was scrawled across the centre in my mom's small script. I gently lifted the parcel out of the box treating it like an ancient artefact and looked at it more closely; grazing my hand over the dented lettering. The weight of it wasn't what I expected; it was light compared to what I thought it would be; then again I wasn't sure what I expected. To me I thought it resembled more a scrapbook-full of the unknown.

_What secret are you holding?_ I thought to myself.

I turned my eyes to look at the door double-checking that I was in fact alone before sitting down on the bed ignoring the rest of the box. I was deeply curious. My mom's creative side was in her literature not her artwork unlike me. So her giving me a scrapbook felt odd. I wasn't even sure if it was a scrapbook- but I had to find out.

I turned the package over as carefully as I had taken it out of its box; my eyes searching for an opening. The top corner had been left slightly loose. I slid my finger under ready to rip the opening when I noticed small black letters beginning close to the top corner. Placing my hands either side of the package I looked closer. It was my mom's writing again:

_Please...not when you're merely curious xxx_

I sighed. I had to listen to her. She had explained that curiosity shouldn't be the reason I opened it. The time wasn't right and I knew that. She trusted me and I trusted what she'd said. I stood up and went to place the parcel in the drawer that contained my scrapbooks and music books. Instead of placing it on top of the rest, I placed it at the bottom of the pile. Having it there made me think that when I next came across it, it would be the right time, just as my mother had said.

Walking back to the box I went to search through the DVD's that had been packed. I was glad to see the chick flicks we loved watching together were there: Dirty Dancing, Titanic, Pretty Woman, love actually and our favourite, P.S. I Love You. Mixed in were some musicals, comedies and some others including the adaptations of our favourite classic novels.

I smiled at the thought my mom had put into this gift.

There were fifteen DVD's in total. At the moment they were strewn across the bed as I'd looked through them; not having a home in the small room yet. I figured they'd be safer back in the box under the bed for now but as I went to lift the box to put the DVD's back, it was heavier than a normal cardboard box should be. Looking inside I saw I wasn't looking at the base of the box but another smaller, rectangular cardboard box instead. I felt my brows furrow together. Reaching in, I pulled the box out and looked at it confused. On the box was a note in the same handwriting I'd seen earlier. The note read:

_Just something that you need, love mom xxx_

I bit my lip not knowing what to expect. Opening the box, my mouth fell open in shock. Inside was a brand new laptop. I hadn't expected it and I hadn't asked for it either. It was a complete surprise to me. I felt tears sting my eyes as they produced. My mom loved me and it was the only love I felt that I needed.

She is the best friend I could ask for.

~o0o~

After everything was away, I sat on the bed unsure of my next move. I knew no one, I didn't know anywhere I could go and the only people I could talk to were 150 miles away by now

My heart began to race an automatic response to increasing nervousness. I clenched my fists to try and deduce their shaking. I felt my cheeks become hotter as I worried about the choices I was to make now that I had complete independence. I had never had that before. My decisions had always been second by my mom before anything happened and that was the way I liked it. Most children would hate their parents' permission on what their decisions were but then again I wasn't most children.

I knew I was being irrational but I couldn't help it. I stared at a spot on the wall where the paint had been scratched off and tried my hardest to think of nothing else but that spot, but with my acute thought patterns it was impossible to just think of one, individual thing.

Knowing this technique failed, I attempted another- thinking of my family and reliving my happiest memories. This usually calmed me, but now it only heightened the fact that I was alone and it made me even worse.

After an hour of hyperventilating and constant thinking I had managed to calm myself down by telling myself how stupid I was being and that this was my chosen path. Three years was not a long period of time to someone like me and it would be over soon enough. I realised now that my head was pulsing and my eyes felt heavy from the continuous paranoia I'd just caused myself.

Lying back on the bed I noticed the blue folder that Mom had placed on the bedside table. I'd completely forgotten about it until now. The folder had a thin plastic cover protecting various pieces of paper inside. The blue was a royal blue; rich in colour and the plastic reflected the light against its gloss. The front of the folder held an image of the college's emblem drawn in a clear white font. Across the top was a sticky label with my name 'Renesmee Swan' printed in small black ink. Opening the folder I realised that this was an information pack from the school detailing everything I could possibly need to know. The first paper I found was a word processed letter holding the college banner across the top of the A4 sheet of paper. It read:

_Dear Student,_

_Thank you for accepting your position here at The University Of Washington, Seattle where we hope you'll enjoy your next three years with us. For those of you students who are staying on-site, we hope that your room is to your liking and if there are any problems present, please report to the housing office in the main building within the next two weeks so that we are able to deal with your request. _

_For those of you who are living off-site and require parking spaces or additional transport, please reports to the admin office within the next two weeks so that arrangements can be made._

_Within this file you will find:_

_Information regarding your school_

_History of the school_

_Student expectation_

_A site map_

_Your schooling timetable_

_On-site hours_

_On-site prices_

_Promotional/ charity information_

_Year guide, including parents' day_

_Event guide_

_Another information that you as a student feel you need, please report to the office staff at the main reception who will be only too happy to deal with your request._

_Finally, for students who are joining us this term, we would like to thank you for joining and would be only too happy to help if you foresee any problems. On behalf of all the staff here, I would like you to enjoy your stay and make yourself at home._

_Kindest regards,_

_Ms. Phyllis M. Wise_

_Executive vice president of the University of Washington_

After reading the letter I flicked through the rest of the papers. The majority of it was information brochures about the school itself, what they'd achieved in the past, along with its most recent newsletters. I did find my timetable which stated I was to spend 18 hours a week in numerous classrooms and having chosen three subjects, I would be spending most of my free time studying too. This I didn't mind much, after all, it would keep me busy.

This timetable was different to the one I had been accustomed too in high school but I was exceptionally delighted to find that they would indeed allow me to study the three subjects I had chosen as I was still undecided on my major. I was looking forward to biology to see how it differentiated from the biology we learnt in high school. I was equally exited to begin my art classes. But I was most looking forward to History and Philosophy of Science as I had never studied this subject before but the criteria and the prospect of it excited me; especially after reading what the course entailed written on another page within the folder.

The student expectations were manic. Everything little thing was specifically detailed: the way we acted, the contributions we made, even the explicit clothing that was not deemed acceptable.

The on-site hours were unnecessary for me as I was living on campus so I just had to be aware that I had to be in my dorm for a certain time. It was the same with prices. I had a card which entitled me to meals and the use of other facilities. I had to pay for certain things but I think I could live with that.

The history of the school didn't appeal to me but I read it for the sake of it. Nothing was of interest to me. I suppose that's one thing I have in common with humans that I already know about. My attention span is more similar to theirs than to a vampire's. On average a human's attention only lasts approximately twenty minutes; mine could last for approximately an hour where as a vampires could last up to a few days; if they really paid attention.

The only thing that caught my attention was the events guide. There was a tour of the campus in fifteen minutes along with a welcome meeting for all freshmen on the campus mid afternoon. I had time to kill before that so I decided that a tour would be a good way to see everything rather than looking at the map. This was also a way to observe human behaviour on my own before I had to get involved with it.

I knew most things about human's since I did attend high school, and saw Grandpa, Jake and the pack regularly but I was with Mom so I rarely interacted with anyone by myself and the pack, well, let's just say I defiantly know everything about how a five year old would act, if you catch my meaning.

I was glad to see that the parent's day was in November meaning that Grandpa and Mom would be able to visit me. Parent's day didn't last the day; it lasted the weekend, which was different. I smiled again at the fact I had to introduce my mom as my sister and my grandpa as my dad.

Shutting the file I jumped from the bed realising how little time I had to make it to the campus tour. I grabbed my coat and put on a decent pair of shoes before I left my dorm. As I walked through the grounds, I analysed everything I saw: human's walking around, saying goodbye to their families and some of them acting strangely childish. I'd seen this kind of behaviour before but not in a while, so it all felt new to me in a strange way. It sounds odd but I was only half aware of what humans do. I blended in more and there were times when I accidently would act like a human. But that's because it's half of who I am.

I easily found the entrance to the main hall so I created a mental note of my route so that I was able to find it later for the welcome meeting.

Arriving where I was supposed to be, there was a buzz of collective chatter surrounding me. I didn't realise how many people were in this area. The human's I'd met in the past were usually quite shy and it took time for them to be able to interact with anyone new. This was something I realised immediately and though that it was the case for all humans. Being here now changed that and I wondered if it was because everyone here was a new person like me, so they had to interact in order to feel comfortable.

An announcement was made by an older looking student. It clearly wasn't a teacher as most university professors were slightly older than a guy who looked twenty.

I couldn't exactly hear what he said but when I heard the words 'freshman's campus tour' spill from his mouth; I strode over to join a smaller group that was now forming.

We were split off into groups of ten and given a different tour guide to show us around. Our guide was named Shawn and I also found out that he was in his final year at UW majoring in both Physics and Astronomy. I listened to his introductions and the necessary points he made about the site before he led us out of the main hall. I kept listening for a while but as soon as we began to walk around, the surroundings caught my attention. Everything was magnificent and clean and despite the old buildings that had worn, it was still a breathtaking site to see. It made the university look royal and pristine. It made me feel like I had to be exceptional to be staying here.

The tour didn't take too long for me but witnessing some of the students in my group I realised that some of them had lost all interest when we had returned to the main hall. I found where my classrooms were and smiled at the fact that my lessons and my dorm were situated in the south half of the campus meaning I didn't have to walk as far and I was less likely to get lost which was unlikely anyway because of my strong memory but it was still a possibility.

Upon returning to my dorm I took a warm shower letting the water relax me after feeling so exhausted. I returned to my room and got changed into some clean clothes so that I was ready to go to the welcome meeting at three o'clock. I had just over an hour so I decided to text Mom and keep her updated despite her only leaving me a couple hours ago;

_Took a tour of the grounds so I know where everything is now. There's a welcome meeting in an hour. Thank you for my laptop it's exactly what I need, you're the best. Give my love to Grandpa and Jake. Miss you already! Love Ness xxxx_

Having nothing else to do, I lay back on the bed and shut my eyes drowning out the remaining adrenaline that was pulsing through me. I felt my brain contract as the weight of thought lifted from it and I felt my eyes grow heavier. I felt my heart rate slow and become in sync with my breathing. As my mind began to tune out I realised I was falling to sleep but I encouraged myself too due to the tiredness that absorbed me. I was aware that I was on the verge of falling completely but I couldn't let that happen, so, I had to make myself jump in order to wake up fully.

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><p><strong>Thank you for taking the time to read again Sweetums'!<strong>

**For my previous readers, this chapter is a little different to what it used to be. This is because, originally, it was 2 chapters. **

**Reviews are like...are like...I'm not sure this chapter**

**Jezzy x**


	4. Chapter 4

**As I have said before, I do not know what UW is like and the way I'm describing it is just how I imagine it so please take this into consideration when you are reading this story. **

**Shorter, un beta'd chapter. For that I apologise. **

**Enjoy :)**

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><p><strong>:Twilight character names belong to Stephenie Meyer. All characterisations, plot lines, descriptions and additional details belong to the respective author. No copying or reproduction of this work is permitted without personally written authorisation. ©2011 JezzyMillers, [0410/11]. All rights reserved worldwide.**

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><p>I felt disorientated and my eyes took a while to adjust. My room looked darker and I realised that less light was coming in through the toilet window. It was twilight. I panicked when I looked at the clock and realised that the meeting was just about to start.<p>

I jumped up and quickly brushed my hair before running out the door. No one was around so I flew down the stairs at vampire speed, stopping when I approached the exit of the block. Outside barely anyone was around but I knew that if I was spotted I was done for, so I ran a little quicker than the average human would. I felt my cheeks burn at the prospect of arriving late to the first thing I was required to attend. What a great impression for professors to have of me on my first day here.

I slowed as I neared the door and saw them being closed from a distance. Crap!

I ragged my breathing making it sound as though I was worn out so that the security guard standing over me outside the doors wasn't suspicious. I went to push the doors open before a hand shot out in front of me.

"What do you think you're doing?" His voice was extremely deep, like a sport commentators. He towered over me and had a bulky build. He looked like he'd be on steroids. His muscles were protruding from his shirt and he looked down at me icily.

"Err...I'm going to the welcome meeting?" I knew I could take him with my strength but it didn't stop me feeling slightly intimidated.

He lowered his arm, "Freshman, huh? Well...not a fine way to start the year is it, Miss...?" he replied smugly, probing for my name.

"Swan," I answered back; my head bowed slightly and the weight of his glare, "Renesmee Swan."

He nodded his head, "Well, Miss Swan, if I were you I'd hurry and get a seat inside before you miss anything."

He smirked at his obvious arrogance towards me and I couldn't help thinking that he may have not had the chance to be strict to anyone in a long time and was actually enjoyed this. Security detail didn't really have the authority to give commands, something I'd learnt from Charlie, but that didn't stop them. They held some higher power and could use it but rarely had the chance. They liked the feeling of superiority given that the majority of them came from a violent background- usually policing or Special Forces. _This_ guard made that point very clear.

I nodded and turned to walk inside when I heard a female voice call from behind, "Well, you and I both know that these meetings are pointless, Frank, so do try and be nice for a change, would you?"

I turned to see a girl about my age walking up the three steps that led onto the platform where I stood with 'frank'. She walked with a false sickly sweet smile plastered on her face which I knew was there to piss 'frank' off. She had honey blonde hair that had tones of a murky blonde and a lighter blonde mixed in, tied into a pony tail at the back of her head and pale green eyes. She was slightly taller than me too.

Frank's face turned into a hard, expressionless facade, however, a note of annoyance flared behind his eyes and his rigid body stance made it all the more noticeable that he didn't particularly like this girl. "It's 'sir' to you, Miss Hart."

The way he said her name would have sounded menacing to a human seeing as he forced it out of his mouth with a spit. This girl didn't seem fazed in the slightest either though and simply laughed before simply replying, "Like you're going to be called 'sir' by me."

She turned and motioned for me to go inside with her on my tail.

The hall buzzed with chatter as everyone was still settling down. I found a row that had empty seats so took one as quickly as I could. To my surprise, the girl sat next to me whilst looking at her phone. I looked at her confused before she stuck her left hand out and spoke, "I'm Jenna, by the way, Jenna Hart."

She looked up at me with a warm smile so I complied and shook her hand, "Renesmee Swan, but you can call me Nessie for short."

"Cool name!" She replied enthusiastically before turning back to her phone, "Oh and you don't have to listen if you've read through the folder. She just basically reads it word for word."

At that moment a woman stood at the front of the hall and introduced herself as the deputy before launching into her account of the rules and regulations us as students must follow.

Jenna was right; word for boring word.

Ignoring the monotonous voice I heard, my eyes wandered the room analysing the students that were now my classmates. I knew everyone was different but even from just viewing their profile from behind, I didn't realise how diverse everyone could be. It fascinated me looking at it and knowing I was to get involved with this now.

As my eyes wandered, I was shocked to see a small girl- by the look of them- turn rigid as my eyes set on her back. My mouth gaped slightly as the girl turned to look at me and her gold eyes bore into my chocolate ones. I was taken aback by the force her eyes seemed to have on me.

I looked away startled. Her golden eyes very much reminded me of my mother. From this I thought deeper. Her pale, white skin illuminated her face with no minor redness hidden under her cheeks. I had noticed too that her human-like fidgeting was repeated, almost a choreographed dance routine. Before I allowed the thought to enter my mind I shut myself off and concentrated on every word that was being said.

I knew that the gifts we had were indeed rarities, but after learning that my father had the ability to hear every thought running through your mind, I protected my mind from invasion. Usually it would be my mom who kept my mind protected but since she wasn't with me I had learnt to block my mind by thinking specifically about one thing.

The black-haired girl didn't look in my direction again after that but I had kept my mind busy the entire time.

As we were dismissed I made my way into the air as quickly as I could. I never acknowledged Frank as I left. I shut my eyes and took a deep breath in as I attempted to soothe my head after thinking so aggressively.

Being preoccupied I failed to notice Jenna come up behind me, "So Nessie? Would you like to grab a bite? It might be nice to get to know someone before classes officially begin?"

I turned to look at her smiling. Jenna seemed a really nice girl and I could tell a genuine person from experience. As I looked at her I noticed the dark-haired girl standing in my eye line. She didn't seem to notice me but she was small. Her black hair was short and spiked in multiple directions. She was deep in conversation with someone and as I inclined my head a fraction to the side I saw a taller male talking to her. His shoulders were broad and his arms were folded across his chest. His hair was a brownish colour that had tints of red flowing through it. A bronze fit the colour perfectly. I noticed then that their skin colours matched perfectly and realised that he too was...

"Jeeze, Nessie, you look worn out! Maybe some food is what you need." I looked up at Jenna's words and saw a line between her furrowed brows. She really cared. I knew then though that it wasn't human food I needed. I hadn't hunted in a week and I was parched.

"Yeah, I just have to do something first which might take me a while but I'll meet you after. Is that okay?" I asked sheepishly. I couldn't let slip what I actually intended to do and I was never the most convincing liar.

"That's fine." She replied with a smile, "I'll meet you in the cafe at 5? That'll give you just over an hour. _Plenty_ of time to do what it is you're doing. Plus, it'll give you time to clean yourself up afterwards."

The emphasis of certain words gave her sentences a certain, secretive tone. After that delivery she turned and walked off without a glance back.

I stood rooted to the ground in utter shock at what she'd just said. I processed the words and how she spoke them. It gave me the impression that she' clicked on to what I was doing. But it was impossible that she knew, wasn't it? I mean, she was human! Her heart beat and her smell was entirely human. No trace of vampire was in her.

Speaking of which, the two people across the space that I was secretly watching disappeared quickly just before the sunlight broke through the clouds a final time before it started to decline in the sky. Coincidence? I think not.

Jenna was not a vampire; how she came to the conclusion of my hunting was still unknown but it was something I intended to find out soon. But these two people were vampires; vegetarians at that which was rare among us.

It was my first day of school and already my vampire world is being bought into my new lifestyle.

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><p><strong>Shortened chapter, yeah I know! It's necessary...<strong>

**Reviews are like Jenna's personality: fun, loving and greatly anticipated**

**Jezzy x**


	5. Chapter 5

**A big, fat, juicy 'thank you' to all my reviewers **_**and**_** to the people that added this story to their alert list/favourites.**

**Un beta'd but still worth reading, if I do say so myself.**

**ENJOY!**

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><p><strong>:Twilight character names belong to Stephenie Meyer. All characterisations, plot lines, descriptions and additional details belong to the respective author. No copying or reproduction of this work is permitted without personally written authorisation ©2011 JezzyMillers, [2410/11]. All rights reserved worldwide.**

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><p>I took me a while to find a way to get to the forestry area in order for me to hunt, without raising suspicion. The entire time I was walking my mind was reeling. I'd been alone in what I thought was an entirely human surrounding for less than a day and already I've come across two vampires and someone who possibly knows something about the supernatural world I am part of. It wasn't something I could easily fathom. The whole point of me coming to university was to be independent in a human world so that I could experience that half of my being without the other half getting in the way. Yet here I was; still with both sides of life attached to me. I knew that I couldn't let it go entirely, it was my nature. Yet I <em>had<em> hoped I could have been involved with human behaviour without vampires getting in the way for once in my life. I hoped to act the normal teenager; the girl who becomes involved in the pointless gossiping of her friends and listen to their life stories.

The vampire's would have bothered me more if Jenna hadn't of raised my suspicions. I had to keep the existence of our kind a secret and I would find that difficult if Jenna knew something about it. I didn't know how to lie to someone. Heck, even my mom found it difficult but she's at the very least has become more accustomed to it and had become better at it over time. All I had to do was nod along to what she said, but now...I had no clue.

I managed to pick up the sound of a deer lapping water at a nearby river. The small motion that created the sound mixed with its warm flowing blood and beating heart instantly appealed to me so I let my senses take over and guide me to my prey letting all my previous thoughts exit my head for a while. As I approached the unaware animal, I noticed that there was more than one deer close by. Within a second I had crept, leapt and tackled the stag of the group. Cutting into his jugular I let the warm blood trickle down my throat before discarding the lifeless carcass. I located another two deer before wiping my mouth with the back of my hand. I was satisfied that i had quenched my thirst.

Whilst running back my thoughts returned to Jenna and the two mysterious vampires again. With fresh blood in me my defensive side perked up and I told myself that I would call Jenna at her own game and find out just how much she knew and whether her facts were merely theories and suspicions. My reasoning of the two vampires was that I would attempt to avoid them and act normal. As far as they knew, I was human and that's the way I would keep it. It was unlikely that vampires knew of the existence of hybrids as we're very rare creatures. The only precaution I would take is that I kept my mind closed off. I could not reveal my life to them whatever the cost.

I finalised also that I would not tell my mother about the vampires. She would automatically view them as a threat and take me out of the university all together. I would not get another chance like this again.

As I neared the campus I slowed my pace into a speedy walk. As I passed a group of people I lowered my head and noticed the blood stain smeared on my hand. I completely forgot to wash my hands and face in my haste to hurry back. I noticed that my jeans were dusted with dirt and grass stains. I looked a complete state and I hadn't realised until now.

Arriving back at my dorm I realised I had ten minutes before I was supposed to meet Jenna and being late after she'd given me over an hour would not be a good start. The fact that she knew how long it would take again raised my suspicions about her. I entered the small bathroom and washed out my mouth- which luckily had no traces of blood on it- and my hands before running to the wardrobe and selecting a new pair of jeans that looked similar to the ones I had previously worn. With her being suspicious, I didn't want to inflict anymore thoughts into her mind if I turned up wearing different clothing. A quick check of my blouse revealed that no splatters had occurred so, smudging on a dab of lip-gloss, I was good to go.

Walking to the cafe I thought of things I could do to mask my thoughts, not just from the vampires but from Jenna too. She was smart, that much was correct, and the slightest falter could give her an answer. I knew I was being paranoid about both aspects. I didn't even know if the vampires had any gifts let alone gifts that were connected to the mind. Powers had individuality; similarities yes but difference nonetheless so it was unlikely that these vampires could read minds like I knew my 'Father' could.

The cafe was busier than I expected and it took me a while to see if Jenna was around but eventually I spotted her sitting alone in the far corner of the room. I casually strolled over to the table. When she noticed me she gave me a smile before I sat down. She proceeded to push a plate with a slice of cheese pizza on it towards me with a smirk, "Thought you could use some food. Pizza's good to have after _that_ kind of activity."

There she went with the brief suggestions again. As soon as the words left her mouth I wondered if she was challenging me to eat, after all, vampires didn't unless they had no choice.

I picked up the pizza and took a large bite out of it whilst my face remained neutral. I watched for a reaction but there was none, "And what activity would _that_ be then?" I quizzed taking another bite.

Jenna accepted this with a smile, "No need to act dumb, Nessie, I know all about you. Well, not you in general but you're kind."

I was surprised that she was so abrupt about it. I was also surprised that my face didn't waver. Instead, I lifted an eyebrow requesting that she elaborate.

"Vampire." She stated matter of fact.

I chewed and swallow the bite I had just consumed before replying, "Wow! The strangest accusation I've heard. And the most imaginative, tell me: what makes you think that?"

She smiled again, her arms folded across her chest as she leant back against the wooden chair she sat on, "I take it one and a quarter hours wasn't long enough to get cleaned up? I'll have to give you longer in the future."

I furrowed my brows, "Excuse me?"

At that point she leant forward bringing her hand up to the collar of my blouse. I looked down and saw a splash of blood located on the tip, "Blood" she said.

I felt like kicking myself, I should have been more thorough and not been concerned with being a few minutes late.

I looked back up at her, "Blood? Interesting query. So," I challenged, "if I am a 'vampire' then how come I have a beating heart, coloured eyes and can go out in the sun?" I realised then I'd given too much information away about vampires and made a mental note to defiantly kick myself later on.

Jenna didn't seem shocked by my indication, nor bothered actually. She just sat there like she was positive about the truth. It concerned me some. How much did this girl know? Does she not know the consequences if she does in fact know about the secret world I'm in; the secret world she may well be educated about?

She shrugged, "Sorry, I just assumed you'd be more intelligent. I'll be more specific next time...Hybrid" She leant forward and whispered that last word.

It caught me off guard and for a brief second the mask I had been holding fell before I recovered at once, but it was enough for Jenna to notice.

She laughed a little, "There's no need to look so worried! I thought vampires were supposed to be tough!" She joked.

Hearing it wasn't enough for me though. She knew about me and I had no idea how. Humans weren't that bright, they couldn't figure things like that out themselves unless, of course, they had been told or had actually witnessed it like my mom had. Was that it?

I laughed sarcastically at her and took another bite of my pizza.

She straightened up and I saw seriousness in her features but I didn't react to it, "Nessie, please," She pleaded, "I get that you don't want to admit it because of the consequences but I only want to be friends. I know vampires okay? I can recognise them a mile off now, so don't be panicked. But please don't try and pretend with me either. I know the truth." She concluded.

I sighed and briefly lifted my eyes to see a small smile across her face and a truthful look in her eye. I knew then she was being honest with me. And I couldn't pretend to her. She knew too much already but I was glad she didn't hear it from me.

"Okay." I answered. My mind was conflicted on whether I should stay restricted because I knew this girl was human or whether I should just not worry because this human already knew about my kind. The former would be more appropriate yet I felt strangely inclined to spill my darkest secrets to her. I knew I could trust her in my heart and that's the place I was always told to follow, "So how do you know vampires then; 'can recognise them a mile off'?" I quoted.

My curiosity was at its highest; I couldn't help it.

Jenna smiled wider than she had done all day, possibly due to the fact that I was letting her in. This made me even more positive about sharing things with her. "I've been around them a long time" She replied.

I raised my eyebrows in surprise, "A human who's been around vampires and live to tell the tail!" I half joked, "How did you manage that?" I added before taking the final bite of my pizza and moving onto the accompanying fries that sat on the blue tray in the middle of the table that Jenna was also picking from.

Jenna smirked, picking up a fry of her own, "So you're saying that you don't know any humans who lived around vampires and knew what they were?"

"No, I'm not saying that. I know humans too; my mom _was_ one of those humans. It's just that most vampires would prefer you as a snack, not a friend." I stated knowingly.

"Well, most vampires don't feed on animals but it doesn't stop that from happening." She replied immediately.

I was mildly impressed at that statement, "So, the coven that you know are veggies too, huh?"

She laughed aloud for a few seconds before settling down with a smile on her face and shoving another couple of fries into her mouth, "Veggie. I like that."

I laughed too. I couldn't help it. Already I felt comfortable around this girl and strangely enough I assumed it was because of the mutual secret we had to keep.

"So tell me, how _do_ you know vampires?" I asked again. I was intrigued by how she spoke of them and how she knew so much about them. Given that she already knew the secret anyway I felt obliged to know.

She straightened up, "First, who are the humans you know?" She questioned.

I had no idea why she wasn't telling me but I figured if I replied then she'd answer my question. You scratch my back, I'll scratch yours.

"Well, there's my grandpa and some of my mom's friends who know about the 'other' world. Why?" I made finger quotes when I said 'other world'.

She dismissed my own question before launching into another of hers, "Do you live with your grandpa?"

My brows furrowed together in confusion, "Yeah. There's him, me and my mom." I paused, "Why?" I made the one word question slightly sharper than I had done the first time. Why was she avoiding my questions?

"So, your grandpa-_a human_- is living with a vampire _and_ a vampire hybrid?" The question sounded more rhetoric than an actual question but I answered with a nod too.

"Interesting." That was her only reply. I tried to keep my expression calm but something was brewing inside me and I felt like I was going to explode with it.

"Why do you keep avoiding my question? Yes, I live with a human. I'm sure that there are other vampires that live with humans too, yanno!" I retorted.

I didn't mean to make it sound like shouting but it did and I immediately felt bad for doing it. I looked up at Jenna apologetically but all I saw was a small smirk. She raised one eyebrow and that's when it clicked.

"You're a human that lives with vampires."

I knew I was right, I could tell by her face and it automatically answered my question. She wasn't avoiding it; she was trying to explain in a way that I wouldn't get confused by. Her situation was the same as mine and unless she hadn't of made me think about that myself, I may not have had the same reaction. She was a smart girl...for a pure human.

She smiled fully now, "Bingo!" she replied.

"Wow!" Was the only reply I could come up with, "How does that work then?"

"Well..." She began. I was interested but something over her shoulder caught my eye and I interrupted her abruptly.

"Hold that thought." I said whilst holding up a finger to her. Through the window of the cafe I could see the two vampires I had seen earlier making their way towards the entrance. With me and Jenna talking about this subject, I didn't want them to know anything. After all, I had to keep my life secret from more than just humans given that not many people knew about the existence of hybrids. Now Jenna was living with vampires; this could not be good.

I began counting backwards from three hundred in Greek, keeping my mind preoccupied before I whispered to Jenna, "Think of something completely insane, like the alphabet. Nothing else, understand?"

I looked at her briefly as she nodded. I saw concentration and confusion cover her face, "Follow me and don't stop thinking until I tell you to."

I stood up and saw her follow me towards the doors. As we reached them, so did the vampires. I tried ignoring them but their faces bore into mine and I smiled timidly as a human would do before continuing to walk. I didn't disregard the look of utter confusion the male had once he looked at me though.

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><p><strong>So what do you guys think? Just to let you all know, the next chapter will be the conversation continued where we'll learn about Jenna in more detail and where Jenna and Nessie confirm their friendship. <strong>

**Review make me calm like Jenna...and smug like her too.**

**Jezzy x**


	6. Chapter 6

**Thank you to my wonderful reviews! You mkae my sun shine on a cloudy day!**

**Un-beta'd chapter. Breaking Dawn A/N at the end too :)**

**Enjoy :)**

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><p><strong>:Twilight character names belong to Stephenie Meyer. All characterisations, plot lines, backgrounds and additional details belong to the respective author. No copying or reproduction of this work is permitted without personally written authorisation. ©2011 JezzyMillers, [2011/11]. All rights reserved worldwide**

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><p>I headed towards the opposite side of the campus in a haste to put space in between us and them. Jenna followed behind me, not saying a word. I didn't turn to look if she was there but I could hear her footsteps following. To say that she was human she was quick and didn't find it difficult to keep up with me considering that I was moving at a fluid haste. It took everything I had to keep my mind focused on something else and on top of that I had to control my actions what with civilians passing by everywhere I turned.<p>

I didn't know why I was closing my mind so much, I knew the likeliness of these vampires having a mind reading gift was slight but I just had this feeling that I had too. I'm sure it was because I had my mom constantly block my mind and she had always kept my mentality protected. There were so many gifts that involved the mind though. I hadn't seen all of them, but I'd heard of most of them. Being so used to having my mind closed off must have had an impact but I'd never had this gut instinct before. I decided I would follow it regardless; better to be safe than sorry.

It wasn't just that. The look the male had given me as I walked out was strange. I knew from past experience that no vampire thought of me as a vampire because they automatically concentrate on the sound of a heartbeat before the scent and even then my scent is more human than vampire. It wasn't until a vampire knew my true identity that they would recognise the vampire presence in me. My reaction to him was the same as any human's would have been.

I slowed down as we reached an open space. My train of thought was interrupted by Jenna, "They were vampires!"

I just nodded as I sat down. We were far away enough now to talk. They wouldn't be able to hear that far.

She sat down on the grass beside me and lent back on her forearms. "Why did you get me to think?"

I smiled, "You know that some vampires have extra gifts, right?" I asked as I turned my head to her.

She nodded as a reply.

"Well, my mom told me that a vampire she used to know could read minds, and there are quite a few gifts that consist of mental invasion." I shrugged before I continued, "I don't know why I did; I just had this feeling about them. Those vampires in particular. I've never had it before and don't know why it's happening. Something inside is telling me to be careful. Weary."

I put my face down. I remember Jake teasing my mom about her intuitions when I was only a baby. Or course, then I could understand what was going on. She took it lightly because it was Jake but I hardly knew Jenna and felt a little silly telling her this.

"It's okay to think like that, especially when it comes to vampires." She joked as she nudged my shoulder. I smiled back.

"So, am I going to find out about these friendly vampire's of yours then?" I asked for the third time.

She laughed, "I'm kind of in the same situation as you really; same living situation anyway." She began.

That immediately got me confused and I would of questioned it had I not wanted her to carry on but she abbreviated for me anyway, "Human, vampire, hybrid-"

"Wait, hybrid?" I interrupted. I'm sure my mouth was currently agape yet I couldn't find the right mental processes to shut it.

"Yeah," She clarified with a look that said 'obviously'. Okay, so I knew I couldn't possibly be the only hybrid in existence, not with our kind being so close to the human race but we were a rarity; I had never heard of any other hybrid until now.

"Who?" I almost yelled in surprise with my eyebrows lifted.

Jenna smiled, "My brother." She stated.

She opened her mouth to continue but I interrupted again with a question, "When you say 'brother' is that biological or metaphorical?"

"I'll get to that part, just hold your horses," She said, "Anyway, a human, a vampire, a hybrid and no dad around-"

I held my finger up, "What makes you think I have no dad?"

"Can you _stop_ interrupting and let me finish a sentence?" She exclaimed.

I figured I was getting annoying and mumbled a sorry but what can I say, I'm a curious girl.

"To answer your question, I know because when you told me who you lived with the word 'dad' wasn't mentioned." Using finger quotes for emphasis.

I spoke an inaudible 'oh'.

She sighed, "My dad left us when I was a toddler and I haven't seen him since. I have one memory of him and that's him walking out the front door." I could see a flicker of emotion in her eyes but she turned away before I could get a real look at what I was, "What about yours?"

That's when I turned my head away, "I've never met him." I said matter-of-factly.

"Oh, I'm sorry." Jenna said softly.

I just shrugged, "It's fine. He left and I'm not even sure if he even knows I exist." I forced a small smile onto my face though it felt more like a grimace.

"Do you mind if I ask why he left?" She questioned.

I smiled genuinely, "That's a bit too deep," I replied, "and how do I know if I can trust you?" I jested.

"Oh come on! We're spilling our guts out here and you're wondering if you can trust me or not?" Jenna expressed mockingly.

We both laughed. It was nice to have a girl-friend for once.

"Okay, so no dad, hybrid brother and a vampire?" I prompted.

"The vampire is my mum." She corrected.

I tried not to look flabbergasted as I heard that. But I didn't hide my confusion.

"Can you please start from the beginning?" I asked.

She laughed before clearing her throat, "Okay well, I grew up in a small village in the centre of England with my mum." She began. It was then when I noticed the British twang she had to her voice but I didn't comment on it; instead I let her continue, "She was human when she had me. So when I was about three my dad left us and from then on it was me and my mum. She had one living parent -that never spoke to her-and her nanna when this happened so I was pretty much all she had.

"Anyway, when I was seven, her nanna was murdered whilst she was out but the killer was never found. It completely tore up my mum and it took her a while to get herself together again. After the upset came the insecurity; she only had me and she didn't feel safe where we were so when her boss offered her a transfer to the states, she accepted immediately.

"Being seven I had no idea what was going on when the time came to move and little me thought of it as an adventure, which I suppose pleased my mum. We moved into a small flat and we got settled and I thought that everything was going to be okay but I was left home with a baby sitter one night when my mum came home, told the sitter to leave, then collapsed on the sofa and cried herself to sleep. I was so confused because it was only that afternoon when she came back with a huge smile on her face before leaving an hour later all dressed up! I remember having to grow up a lot within the month that followed as I watched my mum cry herself to sleep every night and watch her belly grow bigger. It wasn't until I started screaming after burning myself with hot water trying to make her a cup of tea that she snapped out of her state and realised what she was doing to me."

I watched Jenna intensely as she pulled back the sleeve of her jacket to show me a faint red mark on the inside of her right forearm. It resembled and upside down tick. I realised then that this was the faint scar that was left from that incident.

"We quickly moved after that to Mississippi which was further south. I saw her eating raw meats all the time and I asked her why her belly was growing quicker than it should. She smiled and said, 'because your brother or sister is different to you and me and can grow really fast and is really strong'. She bent down to my level and said, 'but you must promise me that you'll keep him a secret'.

"Of course, I agreed and it wasn't long after that that I saw my brother rip his way out of her stomach. I can remember screaming the entire time. She'd gone into the woods so that I wouldn't see but she'd collapsed at the opening of the tress and I could see everything. I was banging on the windows trying to get her to wake up, but she wouldn't."

Jenna's face contorted into a mask of pain and I felt the need to comfort her as her memories took over her mind. A tear glistened down her cheek before she smiled, "I remember thinking to myself 'I'm going to rip that baby's head off'. I saw him crawl over to her and bite her arm and leg before her curled into her. I sat there for hours waiting in the house. Eventually I must have fallen asleep or collapsed because of exhaustion of something because I felt cold arms around me and woke up to see a new face of my mum staring down at my. Her brows were furrowed; her skin pale white but her eyes were bright red. I think I would have screamed if I didn't recognise her smell. She told me everything was going to be fine and that now she was stronger, no harm would come to any of us. Justin George Hart was introduced and it's been the three of us ever since. It wasn't until I was older that I found out she'd met a guy who turned out to be a vampire that seduced her and got her knocked up."

She sighed then looked at me waiting for a reaction. In all fairness, I had no idea what to say. I was in au of her for going through this. She was a strong individual and she was just a human.

"That's some story." I exasperated, "Do you and Justin get along okay now?"

Jenna snorted, "Yeah, it's usually us against our mum when it comes to decisions. He acts like my older brother because he looks older than me-about three years- but that's because he's muscled and because I look young for my age too. He's really protective of us; me in particular because I'm 'fragile'," her nose wrinkled in disgust at the word, "I think he's picked that up from Shane." She concluded absentmindedly.

Without thinking I asked, "Who is Shane?"

She looked at me after she realised what she said and smiled, "Shane is who Justin and I consider our uncle. He's a nomad we ran into not long after Justin was born and he taught them about their gifts-"

"Gifts?" I prompted, intrigued. Okay, I should have known that there was a big chance they had so form of extra talent considering both me and my mom had them but I'd hardly met any other vampires apart from Zafrina's coven and the occasional nosy nomad that passed through.

I quietened my voice, "What kind of gifts?"

She dismissed my comment with the wave of her hand, "Forget that, I'll tell you later. First, tell me about your family!" she all but demanded.

I sighed. Her story wasn't as complicated as mine even taking into consideration the turmoil her story held it had a happier ending. Not saying that I didn't like my life or family; but not being entirely sure of the pain my mother went through is something no one else can imagine.

"Well, honestly?" I hesitated, "I don't really know much."

Jenna looked at me confused but didn't interrupt as she waited for me to continue, "I'll start from where I know.

"I never met my father. I have no idea who he is or where he is and the stuff that I know about him is only from what other people have told me and not my mom."

"So, did your mom know him? Or is it like my mom; a quick fling?" She asked

I felt irritated that she could think that of my mother but then how else could she interpret it? "From what I gather they were in a relationship. My mom's not that type of person. She was human, he was vampire and she loved him."

"What happened?" She pried. I was slightly reluctant to tell her but she had told me everything about her and the way she was asking told me that it wasn't out of morbid curiosity; it was out of concern.

"I'm not entirely sure; no one likes talking about it that's why I don't know much about him, his family or the situation." I glanced at Jenna before continuing, "I know that he left her heartbroken and that it took her ages to heal and even then I don't think she has fully healed and there will always be a part of her missing."

Thinking about it now made my body vibrate with anger, "I'll never forgive him for that. 'Father' is just a name for someone who shares your genes. The word means nothing to me."

"Kind of like me then, huh?" Jenna joked.

I turned to her with a smile, "The mind-reading vampire I told you about earlier is him. He's the one that could read minds. It's one of the only things I know about him."

Jenna smiled sweetly and genuinely before placing a hand on my knee, "Let forget about how lousy our dad's are, yeah? We'll talk about something else." She added with a smile.

I smiled in return. It felt good to have a friend; someone who wasn't immortal...yet.

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><p><strong>Hello my lovely readers :)<strong>

**Once again, thank you or reading..**

**I am indeed in need of a Beta. Hey, if you're clever, you would have realised that that last sentenced rhymed...and now you're looking at it an realising that 'indeed' and 'need' rhyme. Anyway...moving on... (it's one of those days)**

**If anyone has any questions, please don't hesitate to ask them either in a review or via PM, I answer all of them! Honestly, I do!**

_**Breaking Dawn:**_** I was gripping the edge of my seat the entire time I was there and I loved every minute of it! Her dress is gorgeous; the back of the dress is by far the best, the wedding made me want to cry and I loved the whole honeymoon sequence too. The only thing they made a mistake on is that Edward doesn't sparkle in the sunlight like he is supposed too! Major mistake! I wasn't too sure about the whole edited imprinting bit. It looked too animated for my liking, but it still worked I guess. And Bella being 'dead' at the end lasted longer than I thought it would do; it made out she'd actually died and that wasn't the case at all. I knew it was going to end where it did- what a way to make a cliff-hanger- and I can't believe they're waiting an entire year to bring out part 2 when they've already filmed it! :(**

**For those of you who haven't seen it I apologise but you ****must**** wait until after the credits because there is an extra scene at the very end that you ****have to**** watch!**

**Finally, sorry for my ramble but I had to express my thoughts. **

**Reviews are as sweet as the girls friendship and the love they have for their families!**

**Jezzy x**


	7. Chapter 7

**I am currently looking for a Beta! **

**Un-beta'd chapter...as usual**

**Enjoy my lovelies!**

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><p><strong>:Twilight character names belong to Stephenie Meyer. All characterisations, plot lines, backgrounds and additional details belong to the respective author. No copying or reproduction of this work is permitted without personally written authorisation. ©2011 JezzyMillers, [3011/11]. All rights reserved worldwide.**

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><p>It occurred to me then that that little word I thought about could change everything. She was easily one step away from immortality and I couldn't imagine her growing old whilst her family stayed the same age. But then again, Jenna was a level-headed person; she knew what was and what wasn't. These past few hours with her had taught me that at the very least.<p>

I turned to Jenna cautiously, "Jenna, I just thought of something-and you don't have to answer if it's too personal- but is your plan to become a vampire like your family or are you staying mortal?"

I bit my lip analysing her features for any form of reaction. I was treading on soft ground and I could see slight reluctance in Jenna's expression so I quickly backtracked, "Sorry, I didn't mean to pry. You don't have to answer if you don't want too."

Jenna shook her head, "No it's fine. It's just..." She hesitated, "Just that, it's something that my family dispute on sometimes. My mum says that she'd like me to change because she doesn't want to have to say good bye to me but that it's completely my decision. Justin doesn't want me to change at all. He likes me the way I am and doesn't want to see me go through the agony my mum did. Shane's neutral and says that it's my decision." She smiled when she mentioned Shane's name, "Says as long as he gets to see me fight a lion, he's cool."

I smiled with her with both amusement and sympathy. I'd never have to make that decision and for once I was thankful. Sometimes I hated being different but in reality I had the best of both worlds and I couldn't imagine the conflicting thoughts Jenna would be faced with; or my mom for that matter. I'm sure the choice between both worlds came somewhere down the line for her even before I came into the equation.

"But what do you want? That's whose decision is the most important." I spoke reasonably.

"I know," She replied, "I want to be changed, so that I can be more like my family and if the Volturi find out then I'll be changed anyway. I know I won't change my mind but knowing that my brother isn't at all receptive to the idea kind of hurts."

She shrugged it off and I felt my eyebrows pull together. Part of me was surprised that she knew about the Volturi, yet the majority of me wasn't given that they are the most feared vampires in existence.

She gave a meek smile before she added, "Mum's agreed to turn me after college if I still want to be. The decisions hard for me. No one I know ever had a choice, it was made for them and as awful as it might sound, I'd prefer _not_ to have the choice for myself, you know?"

I nodded in reply andsmiled with her as I thought to change the subject, "If you talk American why do you pronounce 'mom' as 'mum'?"

I thought it was a lighter topic and it was indeed something I wanted to know. It was a rather strange human factor that I hadn't learnt about yet.

She laughed, "Well obviously my _mum_ is British and refuses to give up her accent claiming she's 'a born Brit'." Using finger quotes, "Because I was young my accent changed but I still talk with a twang, I suppose. Justin grew up here so he speaks with an American accent too which made it harder for me to keep British-like my mum wanted. The only thing she demanded from me and Justin is that we call her 'Mum' rather than 'Mom' because it reminds her more of her heritage. And it's amusing listening to Justin say it." She explained casually.

She chuckled before adding, "If you ever see me talk to my mum you'll not know where I'm from as I tend to flick between the two accents more when I'm around her." Her eyes opened wider the slightest fraction as she realised something, "Yeah, I suppose it depends who I'm around. With you I'm speaking American but if I lived in England again for a few months I would most defiantly get my full British accent back."

I nodded in understanding.

It was Jenna's turn to change the topic and she did that presently, "You said you knew more human's that weren't your grandpa." She stated. I raised my left eyebrow in question, "Well, who are they?"

I nodded my head once realising what she was getting at. I took my time contemplating whether or not I should mention the history of the wolves at all given that it wasn't really my place to relay a secret despite my close connection to Jacob.

Eventually, I rationalised that if she knew about vampires and the Volturi then she undoubtedly knew about wolves.

In spite of the acknowledgement I still wavered in my response, "Err, well... they aren't entirely human." I wasn't paying attention to Jenna's face but I could easily sense the confusion roll off her in waves, "They're more human than me; not quite like you. I mean, they are human just with an added bundle of power." I sighed, "They're shape-shifters. Werewolves."

Jenna's eyebrows shot up under her swept fringe, "We-Werewo...Werewolves!"

I simply nodded.

I heard Jenna's heartbeat pick up. She blatantly knew all about them. "As in... Wolves! Actual, wolves! As in, wolves-that-can-rip-a-vampire-to-shreds-without-so-much-as-needing-to-be-groomed-afterwards, kind of wolves!"

I nodded each time she said 'wolves' and I secretly thanked my intensified hearing considering that no human would have understood that rabble.

I nodded for the final time.

"Wow" was the only word Jenna could utter for a few minutes before regaining her calmed posture as continuing the conversation, "How do you manage that then?"

I laughed, "One of the wolves and my mom grew up together. He didn't know anything about vampires until after my 'dad's' family had left town and he began to phase. He was mad at my mom for trusting them but then when it was obvious she was pregnant he tried to help her. They love each other like siblings now and they'd do anything to protect each other.

"Because we don't hunt humans they respect us and they knew my mom as a human so now they just consider her as a smelly friend; vampires smell gross to them." I explained, "They had a treaty with my dad's coven when they lived around Forks because they hunted animals too, but I'm not entirely sure if that's still in effect considering everything that happened with her.

"I suppose the main reason though is because I'm his imprint: Jake's" I smiled at his name. "It's there most absolute law that no wolf is to harm the subject of an imprint because of the pain it would cause their brother."

I saw Jenna nodding but then she stopped abruptly and turned to me sucking her lips in her mouth. As she opened it to speak her lips popped, "Nessie, what's an imprint?"

I couldn't help laughing. After giving this information to her she had no idea what I was even talking about, "It's hard to explain. It's like an everlasting connection that wolves can sometimes have upon someone. An imprint becomes the only thing that matters to a wolf; like they're their gravity and nothing else but them is important. Jake said that a wolf will become whatever their imprint needs them to be whether that's a friend, a lover, a protector or a brother." I broke off for a second, "You still with me?"

Jenna nodded and motioned for me to carry on, "He's never been my brother but he's been protective like one and he'll always been my protector whether I like that or not. Recently he's become my friend and someone I can rely on profusely. We'll be lovers one day; it's inevitable. I know he feels that way but he won't show it until I do."

"Do you like him that way?" Jenna nudged with a cheeky grin on her face. I couldn't help but smile and bite my lip. It felt natural talking about normal human gossip.

"I think so. I couldn't imagine anyone else. I won't have anyone else; I don't think it's even possible. I suppose you could describe it as an arranged partnership from birth. But it's a partnership I cherish and want so much. If I had the choice I can honestly say I wouldn't choose any different."

"So you're still a virgin?" Jenna asked.

I scoffed, "Obviously! Jake's not going to rush me into anything."

"But you're not together yet. Surely he'd understand if you had boyfriends along the way, wouldn't he?" She wanted to play match-maker; I could tell.

"He might not mind but I know it would bother him. I think it's too late to even think about it now anyway. I don't think it'll be long before something happens between us and even if I did have other boyfriends, I don't think I could live with the guilt. We might not be together yet but I'd still feel like I've betrayed him." I concluded.

I seriously hoped Jenna would drop this conversation altogether now. My skin wasn't as weak as a human's but blood could still rush to my cheeks and give a pink tint to them as a result of my embarrassment.

She protruded her lips, "Fine. We'll talk about something else... erm, vampire gifts!" She shouted an octave higher than her natural voice, "You said you wanted to know about my family's gifts so we'll talk about that."

I perked up at this lining of conversation as it was something I did want to discuss. "Okay!"

She smirked, "Well, first off my mom and Justin had no idea about their powers until Shane came along and taught them how they can be used. As you probably know, a gift comes from a trait they carried during their human life. Shane has incredible patience-which probably made him the best teacher- but he says that he doesn't think it's much of a gift. We do because he can go up to two months without needing to hunt."

My mouth fell open. Two months! The longest I'd known a vampire to last without feeding was a month. Sure they wouldn't die but no feeding would leave them weaker and could take a while for the venom to heal them if they were hurt.

Jenna nodded as if agreeing with my oh-my-god reaction, "He only hunts once a month. Anyway, it was found that my mum can enhance a human's memory, you know make the details of it clearer, like refining a photograph. As a human she had photographic memory so that connection was made. She also one of the fastest vampire's I've ever seen too 'cause she's always been a good runner. So that's hers."

Jenna licked her lips and I noticed she began using subconscious hand gestures to help her describe what she was saying, "My brother's strange. He sort of inherited his powers-if that's the right word for it. See, he can sort of do the opposite to my mum. She can enhance a memory where he can cloud it- make it less clear for them- which is handy if we accidently slip and reveal what they are, he can make them unsure of what they've seen or heard. Not change it but fade it; like a blurry or dark photograph- unsure of what's there. Neither his or my mum's gifts work on vampire's though."

"That's really cool! See he must-" I started but Jenna interrupted me.

"Oh that's not all," Raising a finger for emphasis. I immediately shut up, "He has more than one gift.

"It was discovered that the _other_ vampire," She hinted obviously not comfortable stating the relationship of the 'other' vampire to her family, "was a tracker."

My eyebrows raised I was interested to see what this would encompass.

"Again it's like he has the opposite. A tracker can sense someone and follow a trail, where Justin can sense when someone-well, a vampire- is tracking him or a close associate of his- like my mum. So like, the tracker runs _towards_ a certain someone and Justin runs away _from_ that certain someone...Not in a bad way though!" She clarified, "It's saved our skins god knows how many times! I think that's why I've remained human for so long 'because when Justin knows someone is tracking us we have time to re-locate."

"How many times have you had to move?" I inquired.

Jenna chuckled, "Enough times. I just hope me being separated from them for a while will allow me to actually finish a round of school where I actually started it."

She looked at me and as if reading the silent question in my mind said, "You don't want to know why. Well... you do but it's kind of too personal to share just yet. "

"It's okay, I understand." I replied before going back to the former topic, "I think the opposite power thing may apply to all hybrids now, you know."

Jenna sat up and turned her body to face me; curiosity creating a new face for her. I smiled at her knowing I wasn't the only one deeply curious by all this new information I was absorbing, "I have the opposite powers of my parents too.

"It's hard to explain the first, most prominent so I'll show you instead." I began, "You know how I said my 'father' was a mind-reader?" I asked. She nodded in response, "Well..."

I hesitated a bit before reaching out and taking her hand. As my thoughts reached her she gasped. In that simple touch she was seeing how both my powers worked and my explanation of them. After a minute I let go and she looked at me; her mouth hanging uncontrollably.

"Wow." Was the first thing she said, "So you can penetrate shields too?"

"Yeah but I haven't really mastered it yet or seen if it can work anywhere else. My mom's the only shield I know."

Jenna nodded, "What's your mum called?"

"My _mom_" I joked, "is called Isabella. But she prefers Bella. What about yours?"

"Veronica, but she prefers Dawn now."

"Why Dawn?"

"It's her middle name. She stopped being called Ronnie when she became a vampire so goes by Dawn now." She shrugged.

I laughed and so did she. It felt good to laugh. Finding someone who was in a similar situation as me and finding someone I could be myself around felt like an immense weight had been lifted from my back and my muscles had uncoiled and relaxed somewhat.

"Oh my god!" Jenna exclaimed breaking my train of thought, "It's almost dark, we should get going."

"How long have we been out here?" I said equally as surprised.

Jenna stood up and held out her hand, "Come on friend, it's time to go."

"We're friends?" I asked unable to hide the hope rippling from my dialect.

She smiled warmly at me, "Of course we are, Nessie! How could we not be?"

I grinned back at her and took her hand. She pulled me up and we walked back to campus arm in arm.

Friends. That's what we were and it made me smile knowing that. I'd never had a real friend before. I class the pack as my friends but this was different. Maybe Jenna had felt as lonely as I once had, given that she travelled a lot. But who knows? I was just happy I could call someone my friend and I felt that Jenna felt the same way too.

I couldn't wait to tell Mom!

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><p><strong>Thank you for reading.<strong>

**There's still more to learn about Jenna and her family but that will all come later. Can anyone guess her family secret yet? If you do PM me don't put it in a review as if you get it right I don't want everyone to figure it out too...**

**Bit disappointed with the lack of reviews. I Know I said I'm not going to ask for a specific number in order to update and I'm sticking to that but I do feel that I could have a few more.**

**Is this story becoming boring or not to your liking anymore? Please let me know if it is so I can speed things up or consider just stopping altogether if that's necessary. **

**Reviews make me as curious as to what you think as Jenna and Nessie are! They want to hear from you too...they tell me these things...**

**Jezzy x**


	8. Chapter 8

_**Fairytales of New York = Best Christmas song ever! **_**Just sharing that with everyone!**

****Quick note:**** The italics in this chapter indicate a flashback/ conversation that happened in the past.****

**Un beta'd. Enjoy :)**

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><p><strong>:Twilight character names belong to Stephenie Meyer. All characterisations, plot lines, backgrounds and additional details belong to the respective author. No copying or reproduction of this work is permitted without personally written authorisation. ©2011 JezzyMillers, [2012/11]. All rights reserved worldwide.**

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><p>There was exactly a week before classes officially began and the campus was thriving with students. Some days it seemed quiet but then others times it felt like they were flocking insects busying themselves collecting the rest of the material they needed for their classes and acquainting themselves with their new home. The students living off-site had also begun to regularly visit the campus. They did anyway as they had to attend the welcome meetings but a lot more were swarming in now. Luckily, both Jenna and I had gotten the books we needed already. I'd found out that Jenna was in the same Biology class as me so I didn't feel as worried for that class anymore. Jenna was also studying another subject: Psychology.<p>

I had thought about taking Psychology myself as a way to learn about human behaviour but then thought against it as it was all theories and it wouldn't teach me about human interaction, besides lessons wouldn't teach me what I wanted to know. Experience would.

I'd learnt a lot from being around Jenna. I speak as though I've never learnt about humans but I have. It's different now though; I have to concentrate on how I act around them. I always had my mom in high school with me so she would help and it's now up to me to blend in which is why I was desperate to learn more. I worry too much.

Jenna's helping me though and I'm finding it quite natural. I suppose it's been embellished since birth but I haven't really unleashed it because I've never had to fully before.

I'd spoken to Bella about Jenna the night we returned to our rooms after our talk. I was expecting her to get annoyed thinking I'd blown our cover already but she didn't. She knew that if Jenna had that knowledge, then it wouldn't have been from me. She was concerned though-as I'd expected. She didn't want me to get involved in the drama that always came with vampires. I think she was mostly annoyed with fate though; I'd gone to college to be surrounded by humans and embrace that side of myself, yet our luck had thrown the vampire world back at us straight away...

_I sat on my bed after I'd returned with my cell phone clutched in my hands. I wanted to know exactly what I was going to tell my mom before I rang her. I definitely had to tell her about Jenna and Jenna's family, not forgetting to mention that Jenna is actually human. I just didn't want to have to mention everything as I didn't want to breach Jenna's trust in me. She had just become my friend, and my first real friend at that._

_I dialled the number and listened to the monotonous dial._

"_Hey baby!" Bella's melodious voice called down the speaker._

"_Mom! It's so nice to hear your voice." I said longingly. My mom was my comfort and not having her around saddened me. But she didn't want college life yet. Not with everything that was happening in La push. The red-head had been spotted on the Canadian border a few weeks ago and her anxiety levels had rocketed. That was one thing my mom _had_ told me about regarding her past life._

_I heard her laugh, "Renesmee, it's hardly been a day yet."_

_I smiled even though she couldn't see me, "I know but I'm not used to being away from you yet." I spoke truthfully, "Besides, day's seem shorter to you; you're a vampire!"_

_She laughed again, "Well, I'll agree with that." She responded, "My day may seem shorter but I miss you already too."_

_She bombarded me with the question I'd hoped she's save until later, "So, have you met anyone yet?"_

"_Yes, actually, a girl named Jenna." I replied with caution._

_She could sense it in my voice, "but what?" She asked rhetorically. She knew there was more to it._

"_She...sort of- sort of knows about vampires." I mumbled. It was obvious she heard me anyway._

"_Oh." Bella replied. My eyebrows shot up subconsciously. I was really surprised that she didn't get into a lecture about it. "Does she know about you?"_

_I sighed, "Err...Yeah, she does." _

"_What did you tell her?" She asked. I couldn't tell what emotion she was giving off which worried me._

"_Well, I told her about us. But I _swear_ she already knew about vampires. She told me to stop pretending that I was human. Mom, she could tell I was a hybrid she knows that much!" I rambled, my voice raising an octave higher._

"_Really, she could tell you weren't human? How? Is she a vampire" Her tone mimicking my own. I secretly hoped that the part where I said I'd told her 'about us' got missed._

"_No, she's human. Her mom got turned after Jenna was born though, that's how she knows about our kind. "I elaborated, "_Plus_, she has a hybrid brother!"_

"_What!" She yelped._

"_I know! I was just as shocked. That's how her mom was changed." I said rather loudly._

"_So that's how she could tell about you." Mom concluded._

_I nodded forgetting she couldn't see me. _

_"Well, at least she's human." My mom said._

_I sighed relieved that she had taken it so well._

"_When you say you told her about _us_; what did you tell her?" She asked. Crap! I cringed internally._

"_Well, about how we live, what powers we have and about the wolves." I told her, not going into detail about everything. "And she told me about her family in return." I added as a precaution._

"_Okay. What did you learn about her brother?" I knew she'd ask that question. She had continuously tried to gain more information on my kind-if there was one. A 'Kind' can't really consist of one being-since I was born so she would know what to expect. She hadn't done any research recently as I had stopped growing._

"_He's pretty much the same as me apparently: heartbeat, normal eyes and according to Jenna he has reverse powers of his parent too. So it's not just me, it must be all hybrids." I informed her._

"_Wow! Well, baby I'd love to stay and talk but I'm helping out at Emily's, so I'll call you tomorrow night okay?" _

"_Okay Mom. Thank you for understanding about Jenna." I said._

"_Oh baby, of course I understand. Whatever you decide I won't get mad over unless they are diabolical but still, they're your decisions and you've gone away to gain independence right? What happens while you're there I'll accept." I smiled. I was so glad that the relationship I had with my mom was good; she knew me inside out. It didn't stop her from adding, "Within reason though."_

_I grinned stupidly at my mom's protection. She was extremely protective of me. And Charlie. Not as much as Jake was but near enough._

"_Fate always has a hand at dealing our cards out eh? I guess we can't escape the vampire world no matter where we are." She stated, "At least you haven't had a run in with an actual vampire yet."_

_My smile fell from my face. Was it just coincidence that she'd mentioned that? Despite what she thought I knew telling her about the two mysterious vampires would have consequences and probably cause her to force me out of the school or have me followed day and night. I'd just got settled in and I wasn't going to change that. Technically, I wasn't lying to her. I still hated not telling her the truth but she'd never really elaborated on the subject. So neither did I._

"_So, I'll talk to you tomorrow then?" I asked._

"_Yeah, okay. Jake and Grandpa send their love too. Good night baby, sweet dreams." _

"_Night, Mom. I love you" I finalised._

"_Love you too." She replied before I ended the call._

She called me again the night after and she asked me the usual stuff. The thing I was most shocked by is she requested Dawn's number so that they called 'talk'. I assume that they were going to talk but I think a secret vendetta of my mom was to find out more information.

When I asked Jenna for the number she'd been more than happy to oblige saying that she hopes her 'Mum' could have a girly friend. It came apparent then that Dawn was lonely too, I mean, the only real friends she had were her children and Shane. I too hoped that my mom and Dawn could be friends.

It became obvious that she, Jake nor Grandpa had discussed when they were going to call me as I got three phone calls in one day last week and it annoyed the hell out of me.

From then on it was decided I would get three phone calls a week: One from Mom, one from Jake and one from Grandpa. I could ring when I wanted too.

Despite telling my mom more about Jenna, I kept my other little acquaintances (if I can call them that) a secret. There was no way I was letting that one slip. It won't stay hidden forever as parent's weekend is in two months and she's going to be able to smell their scent. I hadn't seen them since that time in the cafeteria and I had wondered what classes they would be in. I doubt I'd even see them again.

Jenna was busy today and couldn't meet me anywhere so I decided that I would go in search of a music room. I had access when it wasn't engaged by students and with it being the summer vacation still, it wouldn't be in use. Walking across campus there wasn't that many students around. I'd get the occasionally stare but that was accustomed. A human's subconscious instinct told them that I was a danger to them despite the lure I possess and it was evident they knew I held secrets. Their reaction didn't concern me as it happened everywhere I went; more so with my mom around.

The music's multi-storey block was quite large occupying classrooms, studios, offices, computer lab, archives, a few theatres and an auditorium from what I could see. There were rooms that I had no access to at all.

I found an empty classroom that had been unlocked. There weren't many desks and the room was definitely one of the smallest but what drew me in the most was the small oak piano that sat at the back of the room. It very much reminded me of the one I have back at home except this one was obviously of a greater age.

I ran my hand across the frame and sat in the chair. The legs protested with an annoying screech as I deposited my weight aloft. The lid of the piano protested even more as I uncovered the ebony and ivory keys. I dragged my fingers lightly across the keys without pressing down. I didn't realise how much I'd missed the comfort of music. It had been over three weeks since I last played any sort of tune.

I tested the piano first by playing a simple scale of nine beginning at middle C. Everything sounded right so I began playing the first song I had ever taught myself; My mother's lullaby. Someone had written this melody for her; this incarnation of warmth and joy; this display of...love? As I played, it became clearer that the talented person to have created this clearly loved my mom and for a split second I wondered if that person could be my father. Is that where I inherited my talent?

Continuing the harmony I imagined what it would have been like if he was around. Would he have been the one to teach me to play? Would he have sat me on his lap and played this very song to me? Would her have carried me to bed as the lullaby cast its sleeping spell over me? Would he have composed a song influenced by me; a lullaby of my own.

But as the song I was playing now drew to its end, I remembered her reaction whenever her mind fell on something that regarded him. I remembered the memory of Jake telling me how he'd broke her heart. It was then I removed the image of the amazing father from my head all together.

Abruptly I switched into one of my own compositions not being able to bear listening to the lullaby any longer. Originally, this composition was a light melody reflecting my feelings on the lullaby but with the image of my father in my mind and what he'd done I couldn't play it happy and light. So I didn't. I bought the entire scale down into bass notes and played harshly. It bought my anger out and as I felt the anger inside me simmer and evaporate so did the harshness of the melody. In doing so, I bought the melody back to its original pitch and drew it to its end.

I placed my hands in my lap and quickly swiped the tear that fell. I replaced the lid and stood up but was shocked when I sensed the presence of someone else in the room. I snapped my head up to find a woman leaning against the doorframe of the room. At first I was worried that she was mad at me entering the classroom without permission but then I noticed the smile that formed across her features.

"Are you a music student?" She asked as she pushed herself from the doorframe. She was a middle-aged woman with long light brown hair that fell down her back limply. She had green eyes and despite being tall she was rather thin. But her proportioning didn't look off, it suited her. She wore small rectangular frame glasses.

"No. I'm not, no." I hesitantly replied. I automatically lowered my head.

She huffed a sigh, "The best ones never are." She said; more to herself than me.

She began to gradually walk towards me, "Shame. You're exceptionally talented..." She trailed off.

It was then I realised she was after my name.

"Oh! Renesmee," I stated, "Renesmee Swan."

"I'm Giselle, the director of choral studies and _you_ managed to walk into my classroom." She introduced.

I began babbling my apology, "I'm sorry. It's just the classroom wasn't in use, the door was open and the piano is so like the one I have at home so-"

"Nonsense, dear. It's quite alright." She dismissed with her hand, "You know you're more than welcome to use the Bready Hall next time you wish to play. Or course when it's not in use but it has a newer and bigger piano which you are more than welcome to use. It's next to the auditorium on the ground floor."

"Thank you." I started making my way towards the door in order to leave. I had the feeling I'd outstayed my welcome even though she was being exceptionally nice to me.

"Miss Swan, you don't need to look so worried. You're not the only student not studying music that takes advantage of the facilities. In fact, I had a young man use the hall yesterday; a transfer student with a remarkable pianist talent, like you." She gushed.

"Well thank you." I said once again and exited.

"Miss Swan!" She called. I immediately turned round, "You have a gift. A rare talent. Please, never give up playing." She stated before re-entering the room.

I turned away smiling to myself. I felt more comforted knowing that I had access to music. And, I suppose, I was glad I wasn't the only one 'taking advantage', as Giselle had put it. Walking back to my dorm I found myself wondering who that 'young man' could be.

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><p><strong>Lovelies... I suppose you could call this another 'filler' chapter but it needed to be done for later events in the story.<strong>

**There will be a few calm-ish chapters before the serious action takes place but I can't do much about that I'm afraid and I just sincerely hope no one will back out and that you'll all continue to stick with me on this :)**

**I'm still on the lookout for a Beta. All the information is on my profile.**

**Reviews for me are like Edward playing your very own lullaby! Imagine it and then faint...I would**

**Jezzy x**


	9. Chapter 9

**Before reading this chapter please consider that I know nothing about university. The courses and rooms are true as I've looked them up but with regards to degrees and stuff I don't know anything. I don't even go to university let alone one in America. From what I've heard, you can major in up to four subjects in America so this is what I'm going with. **

**For the sake of this story and for the sake of my sanity please pretend that this is what UW is like. It's fiction after all. **

**Un beta'd. Interested? Then tell me! Enjoy!**

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><p><strong>:Twilight character names belong to Stephenie Meyer. All characterisations, plot lines, backgrounds and additional details belong to the respective author. No copying or reproduction of this work is permitted without personally written authorisation. ©2011 JezzyMillers, [0701/12]. All rights reserved worldwide.**

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><p>It was already the first day of school and everyone did a bad job at convincing themselves that they were excited rather than nervous. It was understandable that people would be nervous but it made me laugh knowing that most people felt nervous and nearly all of them were trying to hide it in order to be like everyone else. Talk about conformity!<p>

Jenna and I were the only ones that weren't entirely bothered but we still let the nervousness we possessed show through. Knowing I had Jenna in my biology class- the one I was most looking forward too- created excitement. I was slightly anxious to know whether I would be able to keep up with my classes. My mom had told me that I would be able to as the vampire part of me would absorb it like a sponge. Of course, I already knew that; it wasn't that part I was worried about- I was worried about the human part of me. In high school I had to pay more attention than what my mom did and now I was at university level it worried me some. I even got to the point of considering dropping History and Philosophy of Science as I didn't know much about it. That was until I'd learnt a human was hoping to major in four subjects. _Four_.

It was a Monday and I had two classes to look forward too: Art this morning and Biology later. I liked the way the schedule worked. Everything was spaced out accordingly and both Jenna and I had classes at the same time except, as I took another class she would have free. When I had Art, Jenna had Psychology so it worked.

I knew my first lesson wasn't a lecture and was a practical lesson so I dressed casually in light jeans, a thick, baggy grey top and grey plimsolls. I'd tied my long curly hair in a loose bun which left a few random curls dangling. Jenna had said that I look simple but lush. Her words not mine.

Walking across campus, Jenna's arm was looped with my own and she talked about what she already knew of Psychology and her interest in the subject. Her talking made it easier for me to ease the thought about what my first lesson would bring. I wasn't worried about the lesson, just the people in it. I'd hoped that Biology would have been my first lesson as I'd have Jenna with me. What made me feel worse was that I was letting myself worry and I didn't like it one bit. It was just something about this lesson that didn't feel right.

I left Jenna outside her building and walked on the where the arts block was situated. A small breeze pushed its way through my hair and I instinctively folded my arms across my chest. Bleak and overcast, I groaned. I loved the feel of warmth on my skin and the way people reacted to the warming of temperature. The sun seemed to pass a happy spurge through its rays. Saying that, I wasn't particularly bothered by the greying sky as it was natural for me to live in that environment; given that Forks constantly had said environment. The wind bothered me the most.

I walked into the building and quickly located the room I was supposed to be in. I noticed a couple stood outside and wondered why they had not entered. Proceeding to the door I saw a white sheet of paper with swirling script written in a black ink informing First Year students that the morning's class had been moved to a different room, taped to the door.

I sighed and followed the couple to the room down the hall. Upon entering I noticed that the entire room was white despite the wooden flooring. Sixteen easels stood in a circle facing outward with backless stools accompanying them. The easels surrounded a circular white podium that held multiple wooden objects and numerous fruits abstractly placed in an artistic design. It was then I realised that this first class would consist of us 'copying' what we could see from whatever angle we saw it.

Apart from the two people I had entered the room with, there were two others already situated at easels. Finding myself lucky for being early I casually walked behind each easel analysing the angle at which I saw the centre object. I found an angle I liked and sat at the easel placing my bag at my feet. Nothing was placed on the easel so I was glad I'd bought authentic sketch paper with me knowing I needed to be prepared. I'd bought necessities like pencils and colours with me but found that a sketch pencil, an eraser and a pack of ten pastels lay on the rim of the easel.

Another few students then bustled in and soon most of the easels, save three, had been claimed. At that point, a middle aged woman walked in the room with glasses resting upon her nose. Her hair fell down in two plaits and she wore plain clothing with an apron wrapped around her that was simultaneously splattered with numerous-both in colour and type- paints. She walked over to the other side of the room and stood in front of a desk I hadn't realised was there until now, and removed her apron slinging it on the desk chair before looking through the random papers on the desk.

The piercing sound of the bell sounded startling me. I looked toward the door and started. My nostrils flared before my eyes bulged confirming my original assumption at what I'd sensed. The small black haired vampire flounced through the door carrying a large bag that looked too large to belong to her. She looked taller than I thought she'd been, despite her being under the average height anyway. I figured it was because the tall one didn't follow her through the door. I averted my eyes before she'd notice me staring. I thought I'd gotten lucky until I heard the light pattering footsteps coming closer and heard the scrape of the stool to my right move and a clump of a bag hit the floor.

_Crap_, she'd decided to sit next to me. Not that she'd had much choice though, I suppose.

I stiffened involuntarily and felt my heart pump more rapidly. I took deep breaths through my nose cursing myself for having this reaction. What made it worse was that I could feel her gaze upon me. I could see her face in my peripheral vision. Swiftly glancing in her direction I could see her brows furrowed together and her gaze watching my face. I rung my fist in my lap and gave her a timid smile. Purposely, of course. Any human would have done had they made eye contact with someone who was staring at them. She replied with a brighter smile. I looked away in time to see the teacher cross the room to close the door. I felt this vampire lean closer to me and I snapped my head to look at her.

"Are you alright?" She whispered. I was caught off guard. If her image or smell didn't give her away, her voice certainly did. It sounded like the chiming of bells. A soft chord played from the highest notes of the piano. Her light voice didn't match the image a vampire was supposed to have. That being said neither did my mother's voice. It did however, sound attractive and no doubt in my mind, it had lured people in. Her gold eyes bore into mine searching for something and I found myself captivated as I recognised the look of worry in her features that I frequently saw of the face of my mom.

I nodded, "Yes. Just a bit nervous I guess." I whispered back inclining my head in the professor's direction.

Technically, I was telling the truth; I was nervous. But not at the presence of the teacher; the presence of this tiny, but dangerous vampire sat less than three feet away.

"Welcome everyone, my name is Helen O'Toole and I am the main professor for the _advanced_ drawing art course." She introduced.

Her voice was full of authority. The word 'advanced' had been emphasised and I felt my nerves kick in even more. I'd known that I'd definitely wanted to take one of the courses based on drawing but when I discussed it with my mom; I told her that I wanted to take the beginners. She had said no because she thought my sketches exceeded beginner. She'd argued for advanced but I'd thought I'd applied for intermediate instead.

That's when it clicked. She'd been on the phone a lot to the Dean and the secretaries discussing issues I didn't realise needed to be discussed. I figured now that one of them was transferring my application to the advanced course instead. My anger piqued; I was going to kill Isabella Swan.

"Now, I suppose some of you are wondering why the classrooms have been altered, well," She paused, "This classroom is hardly in use and is for booking time only for a student's practical assignments. We're doing things a little differently this year as a number of students in the past have chosen courses that aren't their level; that being too difficult of too easy for their abilities.

"So, this year the faculty has decided to go through a small assessment so that we can analyse your capability. At the end of the class I should know where each of you will be situated. Of course, this will all be discussed with the Dean as well along with your parents to decide the best action to take at getting you the best results for your future."

As this discussion continued my heart raced. I noticed from the corner of my eye the vampire bouncing up and down. Turning slightly so I could catch a better look she seemed to be vibrating. I realised then that she was bouncing but because of her speed it looked like she was vibrating; from excitement maybe? I felt her eyes lock on mine and I directed my attention back to the professor talking about why this action has to be taken.

I shouldn't have looked at the vampire. I realised too late that the movements were dim and that no human would have been able to notice them.

"Pastels are the most common form of colour that we will be using this quarter so that why you have them now. You have the majority of this class to copy the image on the podium you see in front of you. This work will determine your capability. Remember," She said matter-of-factly, "smudging is the best way to use these materials and don't be afraid of colour." She finalised.

She wore a large smile on her face then simply said, "You may begin." She looked at her watch then the clock on the wall as if confirming that her watch was correct. She proceeded to walk behind the desk and left us to it.

I snagged some paper from my bag and began by looking at the angle of the abstract form of the object. I took the pencil and began with a simple faint outline of the separate objects I could see before turning them in a three-dimensional shape in the page. The shape looked strange on the page so I drew the outline of the podium I could see and though of an effective way I could create a background to the image. I removed the pastels from the packaging and found all the colours I needed. They were three different shades of brown to use for the wood and different brighter colours for the numerous fruit that I saw.

I got sucked into my work. It was this side of drawing I liked the most. I didn't like to say I was copying; it didn't sound sophisticated enough but it was the only way I could make it simple. Drawing from my mind's eye was difficult for me despite my ease at seeing my thoughts clearly. This form of sketch is what I was used too. Being absorbed my original fears were erased and I was enjoying my time. Based on what the professor had said I concentrated on the way the light reflected and created shadows on each shape as it was the best way to smudge, I found. Using white to highlight and black to deepen each colour and shape; it bought the page to life.

I was startled when I heard a voice come from behind me, "That's really good work!" She praised, "You've managed to shape everything with perfect precision and detail. I'm impressed."

It was Professor O'Toole. I was so caught up I hadn't realised she was stood only centimetres away. Of course, I knew that she'd began making her way around the students as I'd heard the faint whispers of her knowledge as she took in every one's work. From the way she spoke I found it pretty obvious which people she was thinking of having discussions with later.

"Try not to use as much black for shading when you're using a bold colour with pastels. See the apple?" She questioned. I nodded in reply. I was eager to learn; it was what I was here for after all. "With simple crayons and pencils it works but for pastels and wax just press a little firmer with the colour and it'll appear darker." She proceeded to show me with the red pastel on a small section of the paper, "then if you find it isn't dark enough, dot black on and smudge it with the tip of your finger, like so."

I couldn't help smiling, "Thank you."

"Other than that it looks wonderful, Miss..." She said probing for my name.

"Swan. Well, Nessie works best." I told her timidly.

"Well, well done Nessie. Have you thought of what you could do for the background? It doesn't have to stay white." She hinted before moving across to admire the next piece of work she came across.

I hadn't thought about it no, but I didn't miss the sharp turn of black hair to look in my direction at the mention of my name through my peripheral vision. I wondered if it was that my name sounded familiar to her-Swan wasn't exactly an uncommon surname. She might have thought 'Nessie' was a strange name. But it had definitely been 'Swan' that she turned her head for. A chill ran through me at the thought there could be an alternate motive for it.

I tried to block out the professor as she praised the vampire's work in a similar fashion and thought about the background I could do seeing as I had completed the foreground. I looked at the pastels and realised I hadn't used the primary colours: Yellow, Cyan and Magenta.

Without a second thought, I alternated the three colours and drew diagonal lines across the remaining white paper before smudging then in to make it look like colours that had run onto each other. As I finished the teacher called, "I'm afraid that's time folks, we've ran on far longer than we should have. Please sign your work and you'll hear from someone soon."

I wrote my name in the bottom right-hand corner then proceed to pack the pastel back into the box

"You may pack away your belongings. There's only ten minutes remaining anyway so you may leave early but can: Miss Cullen, Mr Raynor, Mr Gerald, Miss Swan, Miss Hayes, Mr Farmer, Mr Barker, Mr Windsor and Miss Newton; please stay behind as I have my decision already for you.

One thing I do ask is that you call me, Helen. Most teachers aren't concerned whether they are addressed by their forename or surname and I do not mind either although I'd prefer it if you addressed me as 'Helen'. If I have not mentioned your name then you are dismissed."

At her parting sentence, action resumed and the remaining seven people upped and left. I packed away my sketch book and walked to join the group forming around Helen's desk.

Helen smiled up from her desk at us all before speaking, "May I ask Miss Cullen, Miss Swan, Mr Raynor, Miss Hayes and Mr Windsor to just stand the other side of the room for a moment please?"

I heard mumbling but we all obliged and awkwardly stood by each other at the other end of the room. It soon became evident as to why we'd all been told to stop behind as I heard her telling the other students that they didn't show enough skill in their work for this course. My heart sank into my stomach as I tried to tell myself it was okay I knew I should have been put on the intermediate course, but no! _Bella_, miss mother-knows-best, had gone and stupidly changed my course!

As I ranted in my head I didn't notice the professor walk over to us, smiling.

"Hello, I won't keep you for long." She began, "I just wanted to tell you guys will defiantly remain on the advanced course. I have been extremely impressed with all of your work. A few things will need to be improved but that will go for everyone."

I couldn't help smiling; I was so relieved. Guess miss mother-knows-best actually did know best. I'd never admit that though; I was too stubborn to see her slight smugness that I _knew _would be there if I mentioned anything.

"I don't want to keep you too long so I'll just say 'see you next class!'" She finalised.

We all chorused out 'thanks' and disbursed. I reached in my bag to turn my phone back on so I could text Jenna to ask her where she was. Once the screen flashed 'on' I walked out the room and into the now busy corridor and sent my message.

I jumped when I felt a small tap on my left shoulder. I turned my head to see the vampire stood next to me.

"Sorry! I didn't mean to make you jump." She said lively. God, her voice was high! "You're Nessie, right?" She asked.

I sort of stood there looking at her, "Yeah." I hesitated. I couldn't exactly lie, despite my wanting too.

She beamed, "Hi, I'm Alice, nice to meet you."

I smiled back in politeness. She was about to say something else when a voice interrupted us

"Alice." A masculine voice called. Not loudly, but loud enough for us to both snap our heads up. I saw him walking towards us from behind Alice. His face was a straight poker face. His eyes were as bright as Alice's and his skin looked a little paler-if that was even possible. He had wild bronze hair that was quite similar-if not identical- to mine. He was wearing dark jeans a white top covered with a black jacket. His hands were in his pockets

Alice smiled at his approach, "Nessie, this is my brother, Edward." She introduced, "Edward, this is my new friend, Nessie."

My eyes snapped to her face. I'd say we were now acquaintances but I wouldn't go as far as saying we were friends. We'd exchanged about five lines between each other.

I saw Edward nod slightly before directing his attention at me, "Nice to meet you, Nessie." He made no move to shake my hand which I was secretly thankful for. If they had some form a mind power he'd see my thoughts in an instant. Both of them would. I could never block my gift from Zafrina unless my mom was protecting me, but I could Senna. And them being wise and all told me that it would be more difficult to block my gift if I made contact with a vampire who also shared a mental ability.

Edward looked back at Alice and they seemed to be having a strange interaction. I felt my phone buzz in my palm and immediately looked at it. It was a message from Jenna saying:

_Turn around x_

I turned my head to look behind me and saw Jenna's form growing as she approached. Her ponytail swishing as she walked.

"How did you know where to find me?" I questioned when she was close enough, completely forgetting about the vampires next to me.

"I have my sources." She replied with a wink.

I raised my eyebrow and smiled, "Frank?"

"But of course." She replied with a smirk on her face.

By then she'd reached us and I thought it was only polite to introduce them, "Jenna, this is Alice-she's in my art class- and her brother-"

"Edward." She interrupted, "We've met." Her tone was a sarcastic sweetness.

I turned to her and she was glaring. She was actually glaring at him. I exchanged a glance of confusion with Alice.

"Miss Hart and I had a little disagreement in class when I simply corrected her on something." He stated.

Jenna scoffed. I saw her ears begin to turn red and she folded her hands across her chest and lent on one foot. She held a proper bitch stance and I burst out laughing at her.

"Well, I just hope she managed to keep her thoughts in check." Emphasising the word 'thoughts'. She stopped glaring at Edward and turned to me, her eyebrows turned up in an apologetic expression.

I kept laughing at her, "Come on we need to go." I said turning us, "It was nice meeting you both." I said before I started pulling Jenna along with me.

"Same here, Alice." Jenna called behind us.

I laughed as we exited the building. "What was that about?" I questioned.

"Nothing, I'll tell you later." She replied, "I guess that means both of us are stuck with the vamps then."

"Yeah, I guess we are"

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><p><strong>I expect a round of applause from you all with a few <strong>_**whoop-whoop's**_** thrown in there with a fist pump! This is my longest chapter yet! Chapter 3 doesn't count...**

**Reviews are better than watching Jenna beat down Edward with her glares...trust me, that is a good sight to see- well, it is in **_**my**_** head anyway. Fantastic, mental, shit yeah! ...**

**Jezzy xx**


	10. Chapter 10

**Another day. Another chapter. Another way to show me your love!**

****Quick note:**** The italics in this chapter indicate a flashback/ conversation that happened in the past.****

**Unbeta'd. New and improved chapter... Enjoy my lovelies! (That is what you are to me. Don't like it? Tough shit cos I love you!)**

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><p><strong>:Twilight character names belong to Stephenie Meyer. All characterisations, plot lines, backgrounds and additional details belong to the respective author. No copying or reproduction of this work is permitted without personally written authorisation. ©2011 JezzyMillers, [2001/12]. All rights reserved worldwide.**

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><p>Having Jenna with me in Biology was a god send. I didn't feel nervous at all. In fact, I found it rather comical having Jenna sat beside me muttering curses and numerous profanities about the rapid dialect being vomited from the lecturer's mouth. I, being faster than an average human, could keep up and take notes at a steady pace. Jenna could not, and it humoured me having her repeatedly murmur, "I wish he'd slow down", "Oh for god's sake!", "please say you'll lend me your notes", and my personal favourite despite the use of worse language, "If he doesn't slow the fuck down I'm going to rip out what's left of his goddamned hair!"<p>

We'd sat at the back of the room as the lecture took place and I know I wasn't the only person laughing at Jenna's antics, nor was she the only person making comments of annoyance. I'd never known a lecturer to talk this fast but the look he had on his face when the lecture began told me he had a hidden motive. My assumption was confirmed after his two hour long lecture when he told the class he wanted to make us sweat and see how many of us combust. I burst out laughing as I felt Jenna vibrate next to me. I turned to see her face and saw the reddening of her face. She was going to combust.

That had to be one of the best first classes ever! I kept the smile on my face as we walked out of class. Jenna turned to look at me and then slapped me playfully on my arm, "It isn't funny!" Her smirk told me that she did in fact find it funny but I knew she wanted to remain her stubborn self, as usual.

The day hadn't gone too well for Jenna, I must say. First, she was left embarrassed, annoyed and some other feelings rolled into one in Psychology because of the vampire. According to Jenna, "He'd not spoken a word since the class began, but when a debate began between the better theory: psychodynamic or cognitive, I had voiced that psychodynamic and Freud's evidence was more closely linked to human development so naturally that seem more realistic. Most of the class agreed with me until he opened that blood-stained mouth of his and knocked me down in front of the entire class stating that Freud was the psychologist that heralds the most criticism.

"Then when I couldn't think of anything to say he sat there and smirked like he'd won the bloody lottery or something. Honestly, all I wanted to do was stand up and shout something like 'hey, I'm human; you're not so go die in a corner somewhere. Oh wait you can't, can you? Because you're a fucking vampire!'"

I couldn't contain my laughter after that. It seemed pretty obvious to me that Jenna hadn't kept control of her thought but she'd assured me she never once thought the word 'vampire' so it wasn't as disastrous as it could have been.

My reply to her was, "Better you than me". I was-though I'd never voice it- glad that I had the female vampire, sorry, Alice, in my class rather than Edward because he seemed more dangerous to me, despite the assurance of his eye colour.

I, however, was forced to eat my own words as I found out the next day that Edward and I did share a class. I'd taken my place at the back of the room when I saw his form walk into the same room, climb some steps and sit down on the row in front, but on the other side of the room. I was glad to know that he didn't sit anywhere near me and because he sat in front it was unlikely he knew I was here. But he was a vampire and I'm sure his sense of smell could detect my unusual combined aromas.

What struck me as odd was that neither Edward nor Alice had conversed in any other form of human contact. As far as I knew the only conversation they'd made were between Jenna and me. I hadn't seen them with anyone else other than each other and Alice always seemed to keep a beady eye on Edward as if he was going to have some sort of breakdown any second.

Biology remained my favourite subject in the weeks that passed with Art not too far behind. I found History and Philosophy of Science fascinating as we learnt about the origin of different theories but I found it to be a highly theoretical lesson.

Alice continued to make conversation with me each Art class and I found myself being me around her. She was really easy to talk too and I didn't worry about her dangerous side anymore. She was very much like my mom in some sense: similar characteristics and kindness. Maybe the golden eyes did create a more humane, emotional touch to vampires. It surprised me one lunch about two weeks into the semester when Alice joined me and Jenna at the cafeteria one lunch. It was then Jenna had spoken to Alice more.

Jenna held the same caution as me regarding both Alice and Edward as she too had not witnessed them talking to anyone else other than the professors they were taught by and us. Jenna and I remained polite with both Edward and Alice but we felt a friendship rear with Alice. During this time, I had noticed how much more Jenna and I had in common; we genuinely shared the same opinions, sense of humour and most of all friendship. I know that I'd always considered my mom as my best friend but Jenna wasn't too far behind that position.

Right now I was sat in the cafeteria waiting for Jenna thinking about the conversation I'd had with my mom this morning regarding an upcoming event.

_I was sat in my room with my phone pressed to my ear patiently waiting for someone back home to answer the damned thing._

"_Hello?" Answered a gruff voice that I didn't expect._

"_Billy?" I replied, startled._

"_Dear Renesmee! Is that you?" He yelled down the phone. Billy was a polite man who though my full name was more sophisticated than Jake's nickname for me; despite him using both now and again._

"_Yeah, it's me, Billy. How are you?" I asked him. I figured there must have been a game on. Grandpa didn't work on Tuesdays anymore. _

_Before he could reply I heard a different voice in the phone that proceeded to grow louder as I assumed, they approached the phone._

"_Dad, is that Nessie?" I heard Jacob ask. I heard a few mumbles before Jake spoke down the phone quite exasperated, "Renesmee Swan, where have you _been_! Your mom's going ape shit trying to get a hold of you these past few days-" He was cut off when I heard a hard thwack pierce the phone and Jake's moan in pain, "Shit Bells!" It was then I heard another similar sound and Jake groaned again._

"_Watch your language!" She told him sternly with amusement lacing her voice. _

_It was then I heard her voice coming through the receiver, "I've been trying to get a hold of you for _days_, young lady, where on _earth _have you been?" All traces of amusement had disappeared._

"_I've been at school, Mom, where else?" I chuckled._

"_Yeah, well you never know." She countered._

"_Oh come on. Is that what you think of me?" I asked her amused._

_She laughed, "Never mind that, that's not what I wanted to talk about." She changed the subject, "What's happening with your birthday? Are you coming back home for the weekend?"_

_I groaned, "Mom it's on Friday, I can't miss class."_

"_Renesmee..." She warned. She hated my moaning. I was never a big fan of my birthday and I guess I picked that up from my beloved mother as she didn't like thinking about her birthday which, in all honesty, I found slightly hypocritical of her._

"_Wh-hat!" I drawled out, "A birthday isn't a big deal; missing a class is!"_

"_But you can easily catch up, baby!" She countered. I definitely knew my stubbornness came from her._

_I huffed down the phone signalling that I was not giving in to her demand._

"_Fine!" She snarled, "But that doesn't mean I'm not going to see you. I'm driving to Seattle on your birthday whether you like it or not."_

_I began to argue despite my longing to see my family, "Mom, I don't want a big affair. I'm missing you all but-"_

"_Just me." She interrupted, "I'll drive to Seattle to you, _my_ daughter, on her birthday. I'll take you out for dinner and we'll go shopping or something?"_

_I giggled, "Shopping? Mom you hate shopping." _

"_Yeah, I know but you enjoy it. Sometimes, that is," I couldn't help smiling; It was true. Sometimes I loved it; sometimes I loathed it, "but I can handle it."_

_I felt a smile spread across my face but I still protested, "Mom, no shopping. It'll only end up with you trying to buy me gifts that I don't need!"_

"_That won't be a problem as I already have your gift all wrapped up for you." She told me smugly._

_I groaned, "Mom! I don't want anything! It's just a birthday!"_

"_But it's your birthday and I'm your mother!" She replied stubbornly, "You may not like gifts-a trait you've picked up from me- but that doesn't mean you're not going to get any. I'm giving you the one I've got you. Jake and Charlie are being just as stubborn, Sweetie. There's nothing you can do."_

_There was no way I was going to win this fight, "Fine. But I don't have to like it. Just remind me to say thanks." I jested._

"_I will do, sweetie." I could hear the affection leak from her voice down the phone and that alone summoned a lump in my throat. I missed her terribly and I was extremely relieved now that she's remained stubborn and told me she was visiting, "Baby?"_

"_Yeah?" I replied trying to keep my tears at bay_

"_Would you like to bring Jenna along to dinner as well?" She asked, "It'll be nice to have her with you. Besides, I'd like to meet her. Dawn sounds really lovely too so It's about time."_

"_Dawn?" I asked._

"_Yes, her mother?" She stated with confusion._

_I giggled, "I didn't know you were on a first name basis, already."_

_I heard her melodious laugh sound as she replied, "We've been talking a lot, lately."_

"_I'll ask her later and let you know." I told her._

"_Okay. I'll call you soon, and _please _answer this time? You had me worried." I could see the furrow of her brows as she said that._

"_Okay. I know; I'm sorry." I replied, "I love you, Mom."_

"_Love you too, Ness," She replied, "Have a good day, baby."_

_The line died and I felt myself give out a mixture of emotions. I was excited that I could see my mom in three days but upset because I really, _really_ missed her. I missed everything about home and honestly? I was desperate to go back. But I would never tell her that. I need this experience, and I'd just gained a friend; my first real, human friend. And I wasn't just about to give that up._

So here I was now, waiting for Jenna so I could extend my mother's invitation. I didn't even know if Jenna knew it was my birthday or not and she seemed to be the type of person who was generous and although I didn't want a gift from her, I knew that she'd want me to give her the opportunity to get one for me.

I was startled out of my thoughts by a vision of red clattering on the table in front of me. I looked up and saw Jenna sit down on the chair opposite me with a sandwich, an apple and a can of soda resting on one of the red trays.

She smiled at me as she opened the can of coke and glugged the liquid down her throat before removing the can from her lips and speaking to me, "So, when were you going to tell me it's your birthday this weekend!" She accused, "Nessie, I should know these things; it's something to celebrate!"

I sighed, "Well, I can't really go around telling people I'm nineteen when I barely look seventeen when I'm actually only ten. Do you see my predicament here?"

She pursed her lips as she mused, "But it now means I have less time to buy you a gift."

My eyes widened, "No! No gifts. Please, I don't want anything."

Her eyes mirrored mine, "What?" She almost screeched, "Why not?"

"Because I don't want anything else than what I already have. I've had this same conversation with my mom and lost and I'm not loosing another, comprende?"

Jenna narrowed her eyes at me, "Fine, but we still have to do something."

"That's what I wanted to ask you about," I began getting straight to the point before she could come up with some absurd idea, "My mom is coming to visit this Friday for the birthday and wants to know if you'd like to join us for dinner?"

Jenna's eyebrows shot up into her hairline, "Really?"

I nodded and stole her soda for a drink as I was becoming parched.

"Yeah, I'd love too." She replied making me smile, "You know, your mom and mine are becoming quite friendly. They're speaking to each other at least once a week now, you know."

"That often! I didn't even realise." I was surprised by my mom's new friendship. She wasn't one to easily trust anyone given her past situation which she'd never enlightened me on so this apparent blossoming of friendship made me wonder if my mom was letting go of her bitter past.

She never showed any difference to me and when she was around Jake and me she'd always be smiling and laughing and enjoying herself. I think it distracted her without her realising, because when she was on her own I saw a different side to my mom which I hated seeing. She seemed hollow; empty.

"That's how you knew about Friday then? Your mom?" I figured.

Jenna nodded, "You know they've already exchanged birthing experiences." She teased

I shuddered at the thought but laughed at the same time, "Ugh, gross."

Jenna laughed before her eyes darted over my shoulder and she whispered, "Incoming..."

I turned in time to see Alice make her way towards us with a smile on her face. Edward wasn't with her and it was more unusual for him to grace us with his presence than for him not to.

"Hi guys!" She greeted us cheerfully. We greeted her back before she continued, "So Nessie, why didn't you mention your birthday was coming up?"

I blinked and looked at Jenna. Jenna had her soda raised halfway to her mouth as she gaped at Alice. She looked at me a shook her head denying that she'd been the one to tell.

"I...I didn't think it was important." I mumbled.

"Not important? It's a birthday! Don't you like birthdays?" She asked appalled.

I shook my head in response.

"Okay, well I can see that you don't want a big fuss but," She continued as I groaned for what felt like the hundredth time today, "But, there's a party happening Saturday night on Sam Carrington's floor that we now have to go to; she's invited everyone, even though I don't know her at all."

"Alice, I'm not so sure..." I started to protest.

"Oh come on, Nessie! Going to a party is a college experience everyone just has to have! I'll help you get ready, I'll protect you from the guys that will inevitably ogle your chest and you can leave whenever you want, please?" I saw her pout and her eyes widened in a pleading gesture.

I looked at Jenna for support but she just shrugged not caring whether we went or not.

I sighed, "Fine." I was stubborn, but I was defiantly no match for Alice.

She clapped her hands together before jumping up, "Thank you. I'd stay for longer but I have to find Edward. He's been sulking far more recently than he has in a while."

Jenna chuckled, "No difference there then." I smirked.

Alice shrugged, "There's a reason." She waved as she walked out of the cafeteria. I waved back at her until she'd disappear from my line of sight.

"I swear she heard nothing from me!" Jenna called defensively.

"I believe you." I replied. Jenna's stance relaxed but her face looked confused. I shrugged it off, "She's a vampire." I stated as if it was the simplest suggestion. But in truth, it was.

I sighed as I thought of the upcoming weekend. I was seeing my mom on Friday; going to a party with Jenna and Alice on Saturday; and I'd probably spend the Sunday sat in bed watching endless films.

Was this really the human experience I was looking for in my life? I wasn't so sure...

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><p><strong>To my lovely, dedicated readers, Here lies the new improved chapters (If you have just found my story then you can ignore this AN )**

**As I said before, updates will be less frequent as I have to try and juggle school work, actual work, FanFiction and a break in my hectic lifestyle. Why I call it hectic I don't know because I don't have a social life at the minute yet I'm always busy humph!**

**By the way, Bella POV's may start to make a comeback as there will be more soon anyway.**

**Reviews are as sweet as the blossoming friendship between our vampires, hybrids and humans. Narr! Gimme some love!**

**Jezzy x**


	11. Chapter 11

**Prolonged absence was not intended. I will accept virtual slaps...**

**Un Beta'd. Enjoy!**

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><p><strong>:Twilight character names belong to Stephenie Meyer. All characterisations, plot lines, backgrounds and additional details belong to the respective author. No copying or reproduction of this work is permitted without personally written authorisation. ©2011 JezzyMillers, [0703/12]. All rights reserved worldwide**.

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><p>Ecstatic is the word I would use to describe the way I was currently feeling. Overjoyed, rapturous, elated; I was feeling all of these. I was stood waiting for a familiar car to make its appearance in the parking lot. Jenna was sat on the sidewalk by my side ringing her hands together as if they were a sponge that was about to shed water. For the first time since we'd met, Jenna was anxious to meet Bella- regardless of my reassuring her. I'd tried multiple times to get her to calm down and just be herself, but like me, Jenna had rarely interacted with more than a few vampires before. Still, I thought she was over-reacting slightly. I'd had a phone call about an hour ago, with a panicking Jenna, wondering what she should wear. All I could do was laugh; I know, not very mature of me but I just couldn't help it. Of course that meant I had to succumb to Jenna's death glare when I met up with her later but I'd prefer her to glare at me than to be worrying.<p>

"Jenna, you're acting like you're my boyfriend who's meeting my family or the first time," I joked, "Can you chill just a tiny bit?" I asked hold my finger and my thumb up to demonstrate.

Jenna glared at me from her position on the sidewalk before she stood up, "Easy for you to say, you're not potentially someone's meal!" She yelled.

"My mom's a vegetarian!" I yelled back. I had to bite my lower lip to keep from laughing. The frown on Jenna's face was deviously cute and could be misleading if you didn't know her.

"It's different!" She whined in return. I linked my arm through hers.

"Look," I began seriously, "My mom is just like your mom. They just look a little different...and my mom is called Bella," I added to ease the situation, "but still, from what I've been told, our mothers have become friends _just_ by talking to each other regularly. It takes a lot for my mom to be able to trust someone and I have no trouble saying that I think _your_ mom is the same. If your mom trusts mine, and you trust me, do you see how there's no reason what so ever to be worrying about meeting her?"

She looked up at me not looking to convinced, "What if she doesn't like me?"

I sighed, "Jenna, you and my mom are my best friends. There's no reason for her not to like you. You're funny, smart and have one hell of potty mouth." I succeeded in making her smile, "Seriously, there is no reason to be fretting."

"God. I really am acting like a boyfriend meeting your parents, huh?" She asked rhetorically as she smiled.

I laughed. My sombre mood now forgot and my high in excitement returning. Jenna joined me looking towards the parking lot entrance in anticipation. From my peripheral vision I could see a familiar head of black hair. I turned to look automatically as saw Alice waving at me from the side of the building. I waved back smiling before Edward appeared by her side. He looked over at me briefly with his expressionless mask before saying something to Alice. He turned to stroll away as Alice gave me a brief goodbye wave before following after him.

His face rarely held emotion anyway but this week he seemed to be voider of any. Alice seemed to care for him more and became attached to him like a shadow in the sunlight. She was genuinely concerned for him, more so than usual. Even this morning during our shared lesson, he had approach me unexpectedly to wish me a happy birthday before seemingly ignoring me completely. His presence made me feel extremely awkward too. It was a worrisome instinct I had around him that week so I came to the conclusion that I would avoid him as much as possible. Luckily, Alice was still dragging me out tomorrow evening. Edward didn't seem to be the partying type; vampire or not.

I was drawn out of my trance by the distant honking of a car.

"Is that her?" Jenna asked incredulously.

I followed her gaze and allowed it to all on the familiar, small, black car that belonged to Jake. From this distance I could make out the outline of my mom in the driver's seat. I beamed automatically, "Yeah, that's her."

The smaller though process I was enduring was asking why she had bought Jake's car and not her own. Her car would be more conspicuous here than anywhere else in the Olympic peninsula. But of course, that was not the most important thing on my mind right now. My mom was here that was a fact; I'd missed her and couldn't wait to see her again was another but a small part of me was frantic that she'd turned up at the wrong time; I'd calmed Jenna down guaranteed, but two vampires who I had yet to completely figure out had just rounded the corner. If I could jump in the car and tell her to drive I would do but she didn't like speeding with precious cargo in her car-meaning me.

The car stopped directly in front of us and the engine cut off. I watched as my mom stepped out of the car and turned to look at me. As she stood, a gust of wind blew in my direction, flaring her long mahogany hair behind her sending her calming, floral smell at me. She wore sunglasses for some strange reason but I ignored that and turned my gaze to the heart-warming smile she wore. I beamed back in response. She began walking towards me at a slightly inhuman pace but I matched it and launched myself at her.

"I've missed you so much, Mom." I spoke into the crook of her neck.

Her melodic laugh echoed around my ear, "I've missed you too, Baby. Forks isn't the same without you there." She kissed the side of my head and set me down.

She cupped my face in her hands and looked at me to see if I'd survived a month away from her. She smile in contentment then looked over my shoulder.

"Hi," She greeted politely, "You must be Jenna. I've heard so much about you from both, Renesmee and your mom."

Jenna smiled back. It was contagious it seemed, "It's lovely to meet you. You must be Bella?" Jenna offered her hand.

Bella took it and replied, "It's lovely to meet you too." She then pulled Jenna into a hug and said, "Save the antics, sweetie, your mom wanted me to give you a hug when I saw you."All three of us laughed.

"Well, we better get going or we'll miss our reservation." Mom said as she rounded the car to the driver's side.

I claimed the passenger seat as Jenna fell into the backseat. It seemed that my two best friends had quickly become accustomed to each other as they talked about school and other bits of useless information but I smiled all the same.

"Mom, why are you wearing sun glasses on an overcast day?" I couldn't help but ask.

"Oh!" She replied like she'd forgotten she was wearing them. "We ran into a situation a little over a week ago and I was the only person that could fix it."

"By 'we' you mean the pack?" I guessed, "Care to elaborate?"

My mom took a hesitant glance in the rear view mirror at Jenna, "She's fine." I told her too low for Jenna to hear.

"You remember how I told you we had a run in with a certain vampire?" She looked at me before turning back to the road. She saw me gulp and nod. I'd never met the vampire before and I sure as hell didn't want to either, "Well, she showed up again. I was at Emily's at the time because I was helping her out- did Jake tell you she was pregnant?" She suddenly asked.

I gaped, "No, he didn't! When did she find out?"

"I can't believe he didn't! She found out a few weeks ago!" She told me with excitement.

"Oh, I bet they're overjoyed!" I replied, "I'll kill him when I next see him." I glared out of the windscreen. He knows this is something I'd want him to tell me.

Mom laughed and so did Jenna as she knew about Emily and Sam's relationship, "Anyway, I was helping Emily out when Sam got the alert from Paul, I think, anyway Colin stayed with Emily and I took off after Sam and It wasn't long before the pack was with us. As we got close we heard a scream and headed in that direction. We came across a girl who looked about nineteen who had been bitten. Half the pack took off looking for the red-head and Sam and Jake phased to attend to the girl. She hadn't had the venom in her system long and from what I already knew I asked to help save her the only way I knew how," She looked at me before continuing; a look of sorrow in her eyes, "I sucked the venom out."

I heard Jenna gasp, "Is that possible?"

My mom looked at her again and smiled, "Yeah, it happened to me before."

"What happened after that?" I asked trying to change the subject before her memories dragged her into the past.

"Jake wasn't receptive to the idea but I did it anyway and it worked, only, because I had drank her blood my eyes became red and that freaked both of them out." She smirked, "I was ordered off of the reservation until my eyes were normal again-they thought it had caused a strange blood lust and I wasn't even allowed to go home to Charlie because of it."

She shook her head and laughed at the absurdity of it. We both could see the understanding behind it though, "I went home after that night though and after I'd hunted. Jake stayed with me to 'keep me in line'" She impersonated, "I'm not allowed back on the res yet though."

"Are your eyes still red then?" I asked.

My mom looked at me and pulled her glasses down her nose. Her eyes looked the same golden colour they were usually to me, "They look normal."

"They do now because I'm not in daylight. In daylight you can still see a red tinge and although it isn't that noticeable it's still there and I'd prefer to be safe than sorry." She rationalised, "I'll take them off in the restaurant."

"Speaking of," I began, "where are we eating?"

My mom smiled, "Right here!" She pointed at the restaurant as she pulled into the parking lot.

I looked up and the black sign that had 'Bellini's Italian' written in fancy orange script as its foreground.

"Mom!" I complained, "This place is really expensive for three of us. It's too much!"

She shook her head, "No it's not, and I can afford it. It's your birthday, you love Italian and this is the best!"

"Besides," I heard Jenna pipe up as we stepped out of the car, "Only two of us will be eating."

I turned to glare at Jenna for that remark; she was supposed to be on my side. She blew me a kiss in return and my mom winked at her. The stubborn part of me wished they'd never met.

We walked in and my reluctant dissolved as the mouth-watering smell hit me. I saw Bella wrinkle her nose before removing her sun-glasses and moving towards the hostess, "Excuse me, we have a reservation for three under the name, Swan?"

The hostess smiled and replied before leading us to a table, "Right this way please ma'am. Your waitress, will be along shortly. Here are your menus and I hope you have a wonderful meal."

I browsed the menu quickly before the waitress arrived. I looked over the top and saw my mom looking at me. I closed the menu and looked at her, "What?"

"Nothing." She replied casually. I narrowed me eyes and she just laughed, "What are you having?"

"The chicken tagliatelle, please." I told her.

She nodded and turned to Jenna, "Jenna, what are you having, sweetie?"

"I'll go for the mushroom risotto, if that's okay?" She asked.

"Of course it's okay. Anything else?" My mom asked.

I guess food bought out Jenna's courage finally as she said, "Is the cheesy garlic bread any good?"

At that point the waitress arrived, "Hi, I'm Rebecca and welcome to Bellini's, what can I get you to drink?"

"Can we just have a pitcher of iced tea please? And three glasses?" My mom told her. I take it Dawn had filled her in on what Jenna liked given that Jenna's preference was either that or coke.

"Of course. Are you ready to order?" She asked us.

"Can we have a chicken tagliatelle, a mushroom risotto and I'll have a portion of cheesy garlic bread please as a main; I'm not that hungry." My mom asked. She turned and winked at Jenna again. Jenna visibly relaxed at my mom's friendliness.

"Is that everything?" My mom nodded in reply, "Okay, I'll be back with your drinks shortly."

I watched her strut away before turning back to my mom and Jenna. My mom was watching Jenna intently for an unknown reason. Her eyes sparkle as she scrutinised my friend sat opposite her. A contrast of hesitation and eagerness displayed on her face told me enough of what she wanted to do and it seemed that that would come to light sooner rather than later.

"So Jenna," My mom began casually, "Tell me a little bit about yourself."

Jenna, would had been oblivious to my mother's stare, looked up and met my mother's intense expression, "From what I've heard off of my mother; you already know a lot about me." She replied with a smile.

I smiled myself and so did my mom. Jenna was being herself with us and that's all Bella really wanted. Yes, she was a vampire but that was to save her life. I didn't know whether she would have chosen this life willingly or not, "Yes, that's true. But I'd like to hear something from you. You're mom is a very intriguing person, I might add and I look forward to meeting her eventually. It seems we have a lot in common when it comes to our past times, personalities and families," She glanced in my direction at that statement, "But I'd like to hear it from your perspective, if it's not too much to ask."

Jenna nodded, "It's strange at times, I suppose, when I properly think about it. I mean, I'm a human who lives around vampires and as much as I love it can be difficult." Her face fell slightly, "Admittedly, I can feel an outcast. I don't fit in with the vampire's because I'm human and I feel that more when Shane's around, as much as I love him, he sometimes forgets I'm human and has been the cause of a broken bone once or twice," She chuckled at that, "But I can feel an outcast with human's too because I've been bought up by vampire's. I see things the way you see them so, try as I might, I do find it difficult." It was then she turned her attention to me, "That's the reason I feel my change is necessary."

Subconsciously, my mom reached out and took Jenna's hand from the table top and held is in comfort, "I was faced with that decision once before too." I watched her closely at that point for an signs of a hellish emotion that crept up on her, "I dated a vampire when I was human and he had a large family that I was intending to join but they all had conflicting view on whether I should remain human or be changed."

"What did you do?" Jenna whispered; her brow was pulled in causing a small line between her eyes in complete helplessness as she thought back to her decision.

My mom forced a smile. As much as I wanted to hear more of her past, my heart wouldn't let my curiosity over rule the love I felt for my mom and the pain I knew talking about it would bring. She shrugged, "They made it for me; they left without me. Only I don't think the outcome was at all what they wanted." She then sent me a loving look, "But from it all came the best-and most important-thing in my life."

She took my hand in her other and looked between us both, "Don't think too much into the future. It's never set in stone. An old friend once told me that it's subjective and changes as someone thinks, creating different pathways and choices. Everything happens for a reason and you _must_ remember that, especially with a limitless lifetime ahead of you. There's no point in dwelling on the past-hypocritical as it might seem coming from me. But-both of you- for now, just focus on _the now_. Okay?"

I nodded along with Jenna. At that moment the waitress arrived with our drinks as another arrived with our food. Once they left, my mom pushed the plate of garlic bread towards us and let us enjoy our food without anymore unwanted emotions. Conversation flowed easily and lovingly including my mom telling Jenna how much she sounded like Dawn. Jenna shared childhood memories of her and Justin growing up and of the little English village she used to live in. My mom and I pitched in with stories of our own and she even talked about some of her embarrassing human experiences-most of which included Renee. Once our plates had been cleared, my mom bought up the dreaded topic of presents.

"You knew this was coming." She told me as I gave her the look, "And it's only something small. Jake and Charlie wanted to give you theirs themselves so you'll only have to open mine today."

I reasoned that wasn't so bad. I took the small gift wrapped box from her palm and looked it over. I ripped off the paper and stared at the blue box. One word popped out at me and that was the silver Tiffany & co. labelled on the lid. I looked up into my mom's eyes and she was just anticipating my thoughts. I scowled at her. She smirked before she set her eyes downcast at the box. I sighed and lifted the lid.

I sucked in a gasp of shock and admired the necklace I held in my hands. It's was breathtakingly beautiful. It was a thin silver chain that held a silver pendent on the end. The pendent was about an inch in diameter and was captivating. The image was of two swans kissing forming the shape of a heart elegantly drawn with specific detail. Resting between the bodies of the swans was a circular pale blue opal that didn't quite touch the heads if the swans

I was so entranced that I was startled when I heard my mother speaking, "Do you recognise the opal? It's from Grandma Swan's ring. I had it put onto this pendent for you because you always loved it so much." She smiled at me; her eyes shining. Mine were shining for a different reason; I could feel myself tearing up at the gesture, "There's an inscription on the back."

Looking down at the necklace I took it from its cushion and turned it over in the palm of my hand. On the head of the swans were the letters R and B; each on either swan. Because the wings and body joined together, it made a canvas for a small inscription.

"Mon trésor" I read, "My treasure."

"There's a saying: A mother's treasure is her daughter. I completely agree with that." She told me.

I couldn't help the tears that fell, "What's with the other letters?"

She chuckled, "Silly," She taunted, "That means Renesmee and Bella. We are swan's and swan's stick together. The opal is there for Grandpa too as technically it was his and that was always his saying."

Jenna took the necklace from my hands and clasped it round my neck letting it fall loosely.

"I know you don't like gifts that you don't need but this is completely personal." Mom hesitated then, "It is okay isn't it? You like it?"

I choked on a sob stroke laugh that came between my lips, "It's the best! Of course I love it! I love you, Mom!"

I walked over to her and hugged her tightly. Sneaking a glance at Jenna I could see her eyes brimming with tears at our affection...

I couldn't have asked for a better day than today but unfortunately it had to end. Mom paid the bill and drove us back to campus conversing with Jenna as I sat fiddling with my new gift.

I got emotional at our goodbye. I'd have given anything to keep her here with me but I knew that wasn't possible. My mom hugged Jenna tightly and in a motherly way. She whispered something to her to low for me to hear and I saw Jenna nod in return. Bella then turned to me and a sob rippled through my body. I hated goodbyes and I felt I was saying another despite her being close by to me.

"I'm never far away, Ness, never. I'll never leave you. " She vowed and she held me to her chest.

I nodded and she kissed my cheeks and my forehead before she turned to get back in the car. She mouthed 'I love you' through the sheet of glass that separated us before she drove away.

I forced myself to calm down and to stop being pathetic as Jenna took my hand in hers and led us towards the dorms.

"It's a good job we have a party to go to tomorrow night; you could do with letting loose a little," She stated smugly.

"Oh, goody." I replied sarcastically. A part of me was excited but that wasn't the dominant thought I had about tomorrow's events.

Jenna turned to me then as we'd reached my dorm, "Oh, stop being a stubborn spoil sport. Alice and I will be here at six. We'll get ready together, we'll go to the party; get totally wasted then crash out and wake up in the morning regretting every little thing we did." Okay, so I had to laugh at that.

"Thank you for being there today; everyday, really." I told her sincerely.

She beamed, "Thank you to you too, Nessie. I'll see you tomorrow."

Inside my dorm I fell onto the bed and reflected on today. It was wonderful hearing my mom laugh so carefree. It was wonderful having Jenna with me and knowing that I would have a lifelong friend out of this experience. It was a wonderful day in general.

It was also a day where I'd learned that my father and his family didn't want my mom to be like them. That itself solidified my growing dislike for them.

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><p><strong>Lovelies! <strong>

**Finally, I have managed to post a new chapter. I'm sorry I have been absent for such a long time! I had no idea I'd been gone 2 months! Hopefully this long chapter makes up for that. I'll definitely try to update soon for you! So, up next we have the party then after that maybe another filler and then parent's weekend (hint: someone figures something out ;)) Muahaha!**

**Reviews are like... Jenna's craziness and love for garlic bread, Bella's tenderness and winks and Nessie's joyful tears and big heart ALL COMBINED! Seriously, it's true. I'm the writer, I should know!**

**Jezzy x**

**P.S. If you are a new reader IGNORE the next chapter. As of yet, it's just an A/N**


	12. Chapter 12

**:Twilight character names belong to Stephenie Meyer. All characterisations, plot lines, descriptions and additional details belong to the respective author. No copying or reproduction of this work is permitted without personally written authorisation. ©2011 Jezzyem, [31/03/12]. All rights reserved worldwide.**

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><p>I woke up this morning with a start; a bead of sweat trickling down my back under the t-shirt I'd worn to bed. The dreams I had were always vivid. I was used to them as I knew no different, but I'd never had this bodily reaction to them before. I couldn't remember what I'd dreamt about and that frustrated me. Because of the start, I knew I couldn't fall back to sleep easily. My usual Saturday morning started at 10 am, but today it started at 8:30 am thanks to my abrupt awakening and I internally groaned at my loss of slumber. The first thing I needed to do that morning was hunt. The reaction to the dream had taken away some of my energy and left my throat aching and parched.<p>

Most of the students would still be in bed at this time on a Saturday morning so I took the advantage and had a long, warm shower. The hot water pelted my back muscles, loosening them and relaxing my body. Mixed with my fruity shampoo, I felt at home.

I dressed quickly, leaving my hair damp and walked out of the door. The morning had a light breeze attached to the sunshine making it quite cold. It was unusual to have any form of sunshine in these parts in October so it was natural for people to relish in it despite the drop in temperature. I made my way slowly and unnoticed to the forestry area where I broke out into a run.

I loved the free feeling that accompanied running. It was liberating. I got the same liberation from running as I did from sketching or playing piano. I ran for a while ignoring my senses and relished in the sensation. But I couldn't ignore them for long as I automatically picked up a scent of some elk nearby and proceeded in their direction.

I drained the two largest, immediately quenching the burning that had started in my throat. I stood surveying myself for a while deciding that I'd be fully satisfied with another kill. Barely a second after that decision, I had taken off after the rest of the group that had scattered. Following the faint earthly scent the elk produced I nearly missed the sweet aroma that passed through my nose making me halt. I sniffed the air again and tensed. The scent was fresh meaning that they were nearby. I eighty-sixed myself and retreated. I knew who the scent belonged too. I thought I was far enough from campus for me not to be interrupted by anyone else; I suppose I didn't take the vampires into consideration. Luckily enough, I picked up the sound of a herd lapping water at the river. Their heartbeats were stronger meaning the blood was fresher and that there was more of it. I approached the river and hid myself behind a tree eyeing my next prey. I identified a small doe that was the nearest to me and lightly stepped forward with caution. I crouched, not blinking once, and then pounced. My teeth sunk into her jugular and the blood slid stealthily down my throat. Animals with a larger heart always tasted better to me. Of course, carnivores had better blood than herbivores.

I sensed it then and automatically tensed; a new smell blowing in from the east. And it was close. I couldn't process the scent with my brain as it was during my hunt and my instincts came first. I had to protect my prey. I released the doe's throat and turned in a crouch, growling. A russet coloured animal then spouted from the trees. The recognition sunk in and I forgot my vampire instincts.

"Jake, you idiot, you scared me!" I told him as I turned back to the limp body. It wasn't quite dead so I had no choice but to snap its neck.

Jake's wooden scent then approached me and I was pulled backwards into a warm wall, "I'm sorry, I didn't realise you were hunting."

I turned in him arms, "Well, why else would I be in the woods?"

He hesitated then and a light bulb illuminated in my head, "You're not here for me, are you?"

His arms tightened around me, "No, I wasn't but I picked up on your scent while we were patrolling and came looking. I was worried why you were so far out. I would have come to see you soon anyway." He was pleading and that made me smirk.

"Sure, sure, Jake." I teased looking away from him.

"Aww, Ness, come on!" He whined, "I know you've missed me too, how could you not?"

I laughed and hit him in his chest, "Smart ass."

"Okay! I'm sorry! I would have stopped by though. I needed to give you your birthday gift." He told me.

I looked at him wide eyed, "Jake, I told you I didn't want you to buy me anything-"

"And I didn't!" He interrupted, "I made it, so technically I didn't by it.

"But Jake that's-" I whined but he stopped me by placing his large warm hand over my mouth.

His other hand was held in front of his face; dangling from it was a small woven bag. I'd seen the bag before, I know I had. He removed my face from his grasp so that he could shake out the contents onto his palm. His raised his hand then to show me a silver chain-linked bracelet. Dangling from one of the links was a mahogany coloured wolf. I recognised it. My mom had one similar from Jake. I could tell it wasn't the same because the chain was smaller and a different wood had been used. Plus, another charm in the same wood dangled close to the wolf; a small rounded heart. On the opposite side of the chain dangled the shape of a swan carved in a lighter brown wood.

Jake grinned at my open mouthed expression and gently bought up my wrist to attach the bracelet, "The wolf represents me and the pack, the swan is there for Bella and Charlie as they wanted a representation."

"What's the heart for?" I asked without thinking.

He smirked, "Two reasons. First, your mom told me that your new best friend – who I'd like to meet soon – is named Jenna _Hart._" I dumbly nodded my head as I realised its significance, "The charms represent everyone who is important to you. I thought you'd like it."

"Jake, I love it!" I exclaimed before throwing my arms around his neck and hugging him.

I felt him arms constrict around my waist again and I felt a wave on euphoria I'd never felt before. It was like a stronger electric current wrapping ourselves around each other. Emily told me she had that feeling with Sam and that I could experience something like it as a way to tell me my feelings were changing, "What's the second reason?"

He took a step back and looked at me to assess my reaction, "You may not feel it yet, Nessie, but one day I'll have your heart. You already have mine." He told me tapping the bracelet. I understood then.

I stared at him in wonderment. I saw him raise his hand as if to cup my face before a howl ripped through the trees startling me. Jake dropped his hand, "I have to go. I'll see you soon."

On impulse I kissed him. It was only a soft kiss but it sent a ripple down my spine and even though our lips were no longer touching I could still feel the heat on them.

Jake tilted his head to the side and smiled.

"Thank you." I told him. He began to run through the trees then. I stared after him for a while before I decided to walk back at an average human pace.

My mind kept wandering to different things, mainly revolving around Jake. I didn't have any particular idea about what was happening. I knew the inevitability to love him; it was destined way before I was born. But I'd also agreed that no relationship would happen until I was officially sixteen, I'd promised it so I was sticking to it. From this I rationalised that things would happen naturally and I wasn't to rush it. This thought alone put a smile on my face.

Half way through my return to campus the temperature had dropped consistently and the sun declined further in the west. A cool breeze whistled the trees and it was then I realised how far I'd actually come. I sniffed the air searching for my scent and found it fading. I must have been out here hours. I made the decision to run back at vampire speed.

As I heard the movement of people in the distance so I slowed back to my human pace and exited the enclosure of the forestry.

The sky had dulled; the day had entered twilight as I made my way sluggishly back to my dorm. As I approached I caught the sight of black hair stood at my door. I sniffed and smelt the familiar honeyed scent of Alice. I looked and saw she was carrying masses of bags with her. I frowned in confusion.

At that moment she turned around and spotted me, "Nessie! Come on, where have you been! I've been trying to call you for the past hour."

"Sorry I didn't have my cell." I told her.

I reached her a second or so later and began to open my door. It flew open and Alice barged in dumping the bags at the foot of my bed.

"Alice, what is all that stuff?" I asked her.

She rolled her eyes, "Our outfits for tonight, make-up; etcetera." All she needed was a _duh_ on the end to match her tone. How could I know that was what it was? Sure I wasn't as bad as Mom; I actually liked being dolled up but I was still a simpleton and didn't see the point of having an entirely new outfit and products for one night. Alice obviously did.

"Right, Jenna will be here in half an hour so go get showered because I need to do your hair before she turns up." She ordered. "I said I'd do her hair while she does your make-up."

I raised my eyebrow, "And I can't do my own hair and make-up because...?"

She just glared at me, "Because that's no fun." I smirked at her, "Now go!"

It was hopeless against her. I walked to the small bathroom I had and grabbed my towel, toiletries and robe before walking to the showers.

The warm water helped relax me for tonight. I'd never been to a party before and I'd never let myself drink either. Sure the occasional glass of champagne or beer but it was never more than one. None of us were sure how alcohol would affect me given that I had a vampire side. Jake had figured that alcohol changed his body temperature but that because he was closer to human than I was, I might be different. Besides, his body's natural response was to heat anyway, without the alcohol.

Massaging my shampoo through my hair one last time, I calmed myself down. I told myself I was over thinking things too much.

I shut off the shower and towelled my body before I slipped on my robe. I wrapped my hair in the towel on top of my head before I grabbed my toiletries and headed back to my room.

I walked into my dorm and froze. Alice's head snapped up and her eyes met mine as a clatter sounded somewhere in the room. Her eyebrows furrowed as she looked at me. It was then I realised that I'd dropped what was in my hands, causing the clatter she'd responded to. I couldn't bring myself to fix it though as I stared at Alice. On the bed next to her lay one of my sketchbooks. She was casually flicking through it when I walked in.

"What are you doing?" I asked her keeping all hostility and irritation out of my voice.

She looked at her hands, "Oh! I was looking for your hair brush and came across your sketches. Curiosity got the better of me. You don't mind do you?"

I looked at her again, "Err, no."

"They're really good. You're so talented! I mean, I know you're good, I've seen your work before, but these are different. They're... wow..." She trailed off.

It wasn't the fact she was looking at the sketches that bothered me; it was what I'd sketched. The book that she was looking through was all my personal stuff. Nothing she'd recognise had come up yet. She'd seen the diner and some other sentimental places. She'd just turned to the picture of the meadow my mom took me to and gushed about how beautiful it was, claiming it as her favourite. I understood what she was saying but the sound of my heart beat filled my ears. The next picture was a photo of Jake...in his wolf form. She was a vampire and it wouldn't take her long to figure out what I was associated with, or who I was in general. The picture after that was a sketch of my mom and Jake. I'd put that much detail into it that you could tell that Mom was a vampire. Alice wasn't stupid; she'd know for sure.

Did I mention that Jenna was a god send? It was at that moment that she'd decided to walk through the door, preventing Alice from turning the page. I felt like kissing Jenna right now. She'd just saved my ass from what could have been _the_ most awkward conversation in history. Alice closed my book and jumped from the bed.

"Jenna, you're early!" Alice scolded, "I haven't done Nessie's hair yet!"

Jenna just shrugged, "It's fine, I'll wait."

Alice came on full force then and started ordering me to sit and hold still as she worked her magic on Jenna and me along with herself. Alice wore a dark blue dress that hung to mid thigh. The sleeves were baggy and were made from a sheer translucent blue fabric. Jenna was wearing red skinny jeans teamed with a low cut black v-neck vest. Her red lace bra was visible over the top of her vest. I was dressed similarly in black skinny jeans; however, I wore an opened sleeveless cotton blouse with a black tube top underneath. Alice had asked me to wear hears but I stubbornly refused so she settled on simple ballet flats instead.

Before long we were heading out of the door and making our way to the other building to find the floor that was hosting the so-called 'college party'. Alice walked in front, with Jenna and me at her heels. I couldn't take that opportunity to thank Jenna for her accidental interruption because I knew no matter how low I spoke that Alice would still be able to hear me.

The vibration and echo of the bass thumped from above us as we walked up the final flight of stairs. Opening the door, people could already be seen entering and exiting different dorms further down the hall. Five doors at the end of the corridor were in use and they all bustled with life. Alice let out a small squeal of delight whilst Jenna gave my hand a squeeze and sent me a huge smile. I smiled back, maybe not with as much enthusiasm. I'd never wanted to come to this 'party' but now that I was here I thought there was no harm in letting my hair down – figuratively.

Before we could do anything else two tall guys stepped in front of us preventing our approach.

"Excuse me?" I hissed, "What do you think you're doing?"

The guy on the right sneered whilst the other looked taken aback at the venom in my voice. It was natural, I couldn't help it.

"There's no entry without a paying toll," He told us, "So pay up."

I was confused and my expression must have shown that. The smug one raked his eyes up and down my body and licked his lips hungrily as he assessed my figure. I sneered in reply before Alice stepped forward and held a bottle of vodka in front of his face. He directed his attention to that and nodded slightly.

"Take it and your perverted ass somewhere else," she hissed, "before I do something to the little you down there." She indicated towards his trousers.

From behind me I heard Jenna snigger and I had to bite the inside of my cheek to keep from laughing. A threat like that coming from Alice was laughable as she was only small and looked feeble. Of course, we knew better, but he didn't and the look on his face was priceless. He snatched the bottle and walked away from us. We walked into a room and found a corner for us before Alice declared she needed the bathroom. As she danced off I eyed Jenna suspiciously. Jenna shrugged and turned to retrieve something from the bag she was carrying. From it, she pulled an identical bottle of vodka.

"I thought you'd given it the creep?" I shouted over the music.

"Please, have a little faith in me," She countered, "That one was full of water. This is the real stuff."

She dragged me and the bottle over to a group of about five people sat on a couch surrounding a small table, "Hey, do you mind if we join? I have vodka!" Jenna declared.

All of them whopped in response before we were indicated to join the circle too. A guy with black hair announced that there were enough people to play ring of fire and quickly dribbled the rules to us. He announced that because he wanted to get wasted that every rule will require us to drink. I was reluctant and felt a little uncomfortable being here at that moment, however, my eyes caught Jenna's and she mouthed 'experience'. I glared at her and she just smirked. Before I could do anything else, the game had been initiated and I was sucked into a game that used up more than half the bottle of vodka. Jenna kept pulling out the higher number cards and all of the aces were pulled out within the first ten hands (which we had to switch to beer for to create a decent waterfall) making her rather intoxicated early on. My body felt lighter than usual and the feeling of confidence entered my system but other than that I was fine. Jenna had obviously seen this so every time a 2 or 8 were picked up she shouted my name. It was then I became almost everybody's 'mate'.

Three of the group left to go and dance so the game had to change. Jenna introduced us to a card game called Irish snap but she added a twist- the last person to 'snap' would not only get the cards but had to take a shot. It's safe to say that the game was a hit and eventually, we were all out of vodka. The black haired guy, who I'd learned was known as Whitey, pulled me and another girl called, Zara onto the makeshift dance floor whilst Jenna was preoccupied with his friend. They were good looking guys but I wasn't interested and Whitey didn't seem to be either so it was fun. As we were dancing to _I'm Sexy and I know It_, I subconsciously looked around for Alice who had yet to return. My vision was becoming a little hazy and the only resemblance I saw was a small black haired girl stood with a penny-haired boy. I couldn't tell if it was her with Edward or not but I was sure she told me this stuff wasn't his thing so I chose to ignore it and not dwell on anything but this moment.

A new song started and Jenna came over squealing in my ear, "Oh my god, I love this song!"

It had been played that night already and I couldn't help but sing along with Jenna. That is until she got the words wrong, "I AM A DIRR-TYY WHORE!" She screamed along.

I couldn't help myself and laughed in hysterics as I watched Jenna fling her blonde hair back and forth, repeating the wrong lyrics over and over.

"Jenna, those aren't the words!" I shouted to her, "She's saying: I am _Titanium_, you dumb ass!"

Jenna just shook her head, "Yeah, but if you listen closely it sounds similar! Besides, my version is _soooo_ much better!" She droned in her drunken haze.

I laughed at her again and continued dancing before my head felt heavy and I had to stop. I felt the wall hit my back before I could register that I had slumped against it. I heard my heartbeat in my head and I panicked, "Jenna!" I tried to call but my voice couldn't be heard.

I had no idea what was happening as I felt my blood burn inside me. My body must have been responding to the alcohol but it never affected a human rapidly like this. Sure, if they drank a lot then they could pass out but I didn't feel any of the effects until now. I'd lost my inhibitions and my eye sight was blurry now and then but nothing else had affected me yet, so why now? A searing heat rocketed through me igniting a fire in my chest and I collapsed on the floor not being able to hold myself up. My eye sight blurred as tears formed in my eyes but these tears stung. It hit me then like a ton of bricks. It was venom. The venom in my body was reacting to the alcohol I'd consumed. As with every contaminant, my venom expelled a foreign substance as it would a virus.

Before I could think anymore the fire went into my head and I looked around frantically. From my blurred vision I could see two people make their way over to me before they slanted to the left and I blacked out.

-o0o-

I verged on a state of consciousness and I felt no weight on me at all. My head was slumped against something hard and I registered the motion of being carried. Other than that I couldn't fathom anything else. As my body woke up steadily my mind forced it back into slumber. I couldn't physically make my body move so I just lay still in whose ever arms were carrying me. For some reason I felt safe, but that was all I could comprehend...until I heard voices.

"I can't believe we have to do this." I heard a male voice groan. I recognised it but I couldn't put it to a name. I felt the vibrations against my ear which told me this person was carrying me.

A female voice replied, "Suck it up, Edward, we couldn't just leave them."

Edward. An Edward was carrying me. Wait, Alice's Edward? Hold on, _them_? Who else was with us?

"Yes, we could have." He grunted

"Could you really?"

I felt him sigh, "Probably not in the state she's in, no."

Was he referring to me or to the other person? I heard the female chuckle before a silence fell. I couldn't hear anything so it startled me when he tensed and spoke.

"Alice, we're not getting into this again. There is no resemblance at all, besides she'd be too old to be her daughter." He hissed. So it was Alice then.

"It doesn't have to be her daughter!"

"If she was a sister, we'd have known; it's only been ten years." After a pause his body stance changed then and his voice became laced with fury, "She's not dead!"

"And how do you know when you've not thought to check?" Alice whispered, "My visions are subjective you know that! They're could be many reasons why I can't see her."

He sighed, "It's been ten years. If I go and she's moved on, I don't think I could bare it. If I go and see she's dead it'll be even worse. Either way I wouldn't know how I could cope. I can't Alice, please just drop it."

Who knew that a vampire could have so much baggage attached to them? I mentally screamed then praying that either they didn't have a gift or that because of my intoxication that my thoughts were incoherent.

"Fine," She told him, "This is her dorm; just put her on the bed."

I felt myself being lowered onto a bed before my shoes were removed and the covers were pulled over me. My body felt heavier.

Alice's voice seemed further away when she next spoke, "It's a good job I can hear her heartbeat; she looks dead."

She was definitely talking about me.

Edward chuckled, "That's humans for you. We all know they're reckless and idiotic. Especially teenagers."

"_We_ are teenagers."

I didn't hear the rest of the conversation as my mind won and my senses cut off into a peaceful bliss that were my dreams.

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><p><strong>Reviews are partying hard with Jenna and being carried home at night in Edwards arms. Mmmmmm!<strong>

**Reviews supply my motivation so p****lease be considerate and tell me what you think! We are progressing and parent's weekend is coming soon... DUN DUN DUN!**

**Love Jezzy x**


	13. Chapter 13

**Okay, so I had a better response for the last chapter. Thank you so much!**

**Un beta'd. It's my birthday today and I wanted to get it out there!**

**Important A/N at the bottom, please read. Enjoy**

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><p><strong>:Twilight character names belong to Stephenie Meyer. All characterisations, plot lines, descriptions and additional details belong to the respective author. No copying or reproduction of this work is permitted without personally written authorisation. ©2011 JezzyMillers, [1204/12]. All rights reserved worldwide.**

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><p>My eye lids felt like heavy weights had been attached to them preventing them from opening. My mouth felt raw and in dire need of hydration. When my eyes opened fully I had to shut them again to prevent the obscene amount of light that blinded me. I opened them gradually letting my pupils dilate accordingly. I sat up in bed and felt the heavy weight inside my head slump, expecting me to fall back down again. I looked over at my night stand and the time on the clock read 10:17am in red computerised numbers. Sat next to the clock were two glasses of water and two sets of aspirin that had been left out. I grab two tablets and one of the glasses and consumed the lot. I thought back to last night and what it entailed. I remembered the 'toll', meeting Whitey and playing those drinking games, ugh. I played back my memories and giggled a little at Jenna's over-exuberant dance moves. It was then I remembered my theory of hybrids mixed with alcohol. I cringed as my head pounded as if it were mocking me. I figured a shower would help me so I threw off the covers and sat up. I looked down and found myself in the outfit I was wearing last night, minus, my shoes. I went to place my feet on the floor and as one foot made contact on something other than the thin carpet that covered my dorm, I heard a strange groaning noise. Looking down at the floor I saw Jenna sprawled out with a pillow beneath her head and a blanket tangled with her legs. Her hair was splayed across her face and her make-up looking positively clown-like.<p>

How did Jenna end up in my room? The memory clicked itself in place like a missing jigsaw piece as I remembered how and who had bought us back. Did Edward really carry me?

The conversation that I remember listening to was hazy so I didn't dwell on it, besides; I was more concerned how he had not heard my thoughts. Then again, I could barely differentiate consciousness from unconsciousness last night so I doubt he'd have found my thoughts coherent in any sense. That is of course if he is gifted in that way. I needed to be calmer in that situation. I'd found one thing out about my biological father and now I automatically believed that all vampires had a mind gift. I needed to rationalise a bit. Still, it was better to be safe I suppose.

I grabbed my towel and toiletries before heading to take a long shower. No one was around as I walked slowly, praying that the headache would dull. I turned on the shower and stepped under the spray letting the water drip down my body waking my muscles. I tilted my head back and left it there enjoying the feel of the cool splatter on my cheeks and forehead, letting it wash away the throb it held from last night. I began to massage the shampoo in my hair slowly, continuing until I'd done the same with the conditioner and had massaged my aching muscles with the shower gel. Letting my head fall under the spray one last time, I turned off the shower and reached for my towel. Suddenly, I jerked my eyes open and looked around. My head seemed completely clear, like the headache happened ages ago. I felt no pain anywhere, no tiredness; I felt alert-like my normal self.

I stood there for a while trying to think of an explanation. Whether it was the truth or not, I concluded that because of the venom, my bodily reactions to the alcohol happen quicker than a human. They intoxicate quicker and recover quicker.

I hastily made my way back to my dorm to get myself dressed, luckily, passing no one in the corridors. Upon entering my room, I noticed that the place where Jenna was sprawled no longer occupied a person. My brow furrowed until I heard the sound of retching coming from the small bathroom at the back of the room. I quickly threw on some underwear and called to her, "Jenna, are you okay?"

A muffled groan was all I got in reply before more retching could be heard. I progressed to the door and as I pushed it open I was hit with the smell. I fought my own urge to gag and leaned over to Jenna. I pulled the hair from her face and held it at the back of her head whilst running her back in an attempt to help. Her hair was tangled and she no longer wore her jeans.

I heard her inhale deeply and I knew that she no longer felt any more need to be sick. I let her hair fall down her back and used my free hands to hand her some toilet paper to wipe her mouth with. She took it gratefully and began moving her head from the bowl of the toilet. I let the lid fall and flushed the chain to rid the rancid smell it produced. I walked out and picked up the second glass of water from the bedside table and walked back to hand it to Jenna.

I stopped as I took in Jenna's appearance. He hair spiked awkwardly in different directions, her tank top was skewed across her chest, her eye make-up had smudge in her sleep and had somehow ended up creating marks on her forehead, nose and cheeks and the lipstick she had wore was brushed across her face.

A bubble of laughter made its way up my throat and echoed around the small space. I felt the glass being snatched from my hand. I looked down and Jenna was glaring at me as she gulped down the water. When she's finished she thrust the glass at me to which I took and quietened down, "Well, aren't you a sight for sore eyes?" I teased, "_You look wonderful_." I emphasised each word purposely causing her glare to turn to a murderous one.

She couldn't hold it long as she groaned closing her eyes at the forced she'd exerted onto her head. She leant back and rested it against the wall causing me to laugh again.

"Why aren't you hung-over? You drank more than I did!" She complained.

I smiled, "I did feel bad this morning but after a lovely shower I feel perfectly fine; it must be these vampire genes I possess. You should get some."

She growled-actually _growled_-at me and threw the paper she'd used to wipe her mouth with at me. I dodged it and we both watched it fall pathetically to the floor. I bit the inside of my bottom lip to keep from laughing again. She noticed and pointed an accusing finger at me, "If you don't stop taking the piss, I'm going to use your toothbrush to clean my teeth and then the toilet, got it?"

I shrugged, "I have a spare."

She growled again and stood up before falling to the toilet seat and holding her head in her hands, moaning. I couldn't contain it anymore and laughed.

"GET OUT NOW!" She yelled. I turned and made my way to the closet to throw on some clothes, "You're a bitch, Renesmee Swan!" She added.

"And I love you too, Jenna Hart!" I called back to her.

Once dressed, I made my bed and straightened the blankets that lay on the floor. Jenna had yet to emerge from the bathroom. Coincidently, she did as I'd finished laying the final blanket back over the bed in its rightful place, and flopped heavily on the straightened bed sheets. She pulled the blanket over her and smirked in my direction with her eyes closed.

She'd done that on purpose.

Her glee at annoying me didn't last long as there was a loud knock on my door. I heard her mumble a profanity under her breath, directed at the visitor, as I approached the door. I opened it to reveal Sarah, the girl we'd spent a lot of the night.

"Hi!" I called at her louder than usual to annoy Jenna.

Sarah chuckled at Jenna's groan, "Hey, Ness. Is Jenna okay?"

Jenna shot up on the bed and glared at the both of us. Sarah gasped and then sniggered. Jenna glowered in response, "You drunk just as much as I did last night too!" She yelled at Sarah waving her out frantically, "How come you look just as perky as _her_?" She pointed at me.

Sarah smiled, "I happen to know it helps _a lot_ if you drink plenty of water before you go to sleep. I guess you forgot to do that."

Jenna groaned and fell back on the bed ignoring any more of our conversation. I turned back to Sarah, "So, was there any particular reason you came over or..." I trailed off. I didn't mean it in a rude way I just wondered why she'd come over.

Thankfully, she didn't take it in a bad way, "Oh, I just came to check on the both of you. You were a bit worse for wear when I last saw you. As I can recall, Jenna was on the verge of grinding a table."

I looked back at Jenna in time to see her raise her hand and gesture with her middle finger.

Sarah continued, "I just came back from checking on Whitey. He's somehow ended up with someone else's jeans; don't ask me how." I laughed at that, "Oh and I ran into Helen on my morning stroll and she says to spread the word that they're moving parent's weekend to this weekend coming, something about being too close to Thanksgiving. Anyway, the Dean is making an announcement later and sending a letter to parents or something. I don't know much but I thought I'd spread the word"

I smiled at her, "Okay thanks, Sarah. If you need any help with Whitey, come and get me. I think I'll be taking care of that one today, anyway." Indicating to Jenna.

"Will do; see you later, Nessie." She turned and walked away. I closed the door behind her and walked over to the bed. I sat down with Jenna and looked at her, "How's your head?"

"It's killing me." She moaned. I turned to look at the time and noticed the other set of tablets resting on the table.

I scooped them up and handed them to her. She took them gratefully and threw them in her mouth, "I'll get you some more water." I walked to the bathroom with her empty glass and filled it with the tap. I handed it to her and she glugged it back before she turned over and closed her eyes.

"I'll wake you up in an hour. You need to call your mom and tell her about parent's weekend and you really need a shower."

She nodded lamely at me from where she was. I walked across to the desk with my phone and called my mom. She answered on the first ring, "Hey Baby, are you okay?"

"Yeah Mom, I'm fine. I wish I could say the same about Jenna." I chuckled

"Why what's wrong with her?"

I could hear anxiety run through her voice and I rushed to correct her, "Oh, she's just got a really bad hangover. There was a party last night."

"A party? Did you drink?" She accused.

"Yes and nothing terrible happened to me except I had to be carried back to my dorm." I heard her about to interrupt but I couldn't go into more detail about that, "I'm fine! I figured out what happens; I wasn't calling you for that, I have something else to tell you."

I heard muffled voices in the background and one of them was a voice I didn't recognise, "Mom, who are you with?"

"I'm with Dawn!" She told me happily, "I was just filling her in on Jenna's current state."

"Oops," I muttered before changing the subject, "Well, seeing as you're both there, I called to tell you that parent's weekend has been moved from the 16th to the 2rd which is this weekend coming. I just thought I'd let you know so you could tell Grandpa and get him prepared."

I heard Bella chuckle at that then relay the message to Dawn before returning to me, "Okay, well I'll see you then, Sweetie. Is everything else going okay?"

"Yes everything's fine. I'll leave you guys to it and I'll see you next weekend."

"Okay. And Nessie, Dawn says can you make sure Jenna calls her later and that she won't be stopping Justin from tormenting her about this because she deserves it, okay?"

I laughed at that. If Jenna hated me teasing; she'll hate her brother even more, "I will do, Mom. I love you."

"I love you too."

With that the phone call ended and I looked over at Jenna one last time before deciding to leave her. Although the way she looked and the way her mouth hung open when she was sleeping made me laugh and I had to record it somehow. Knowing she'd be knocked out for a while, I picked out a sketch book and started drawing what I saw. I decided to label it 'Jenna at her finest'.

-o0o-

The text that alerted me to my family's whereabouts had me running from my dorm ready to meet them at the entrance gates. By running, I meant human pace not vampire no matter how much I really wanted too. I ignored everything around me knowing my mom would be here soon.

One voice that had me hesitate for a second though was the high pitched 'Nessie!' that was called from behind me somewhere. My head automatically snapped in that direction and I saw Alice waving her hand in my direction as greeting. I waved back at her whilst quickly analysing her companions. A blonde male stood beside Alice with his hand wrapped around her waist; his eyes solely focused on her. I looked passed them slightly and noticed Edward leaning casually against a modern silver Volvo. His face looked animated as he spoke to an older couple that stood next to a black Mercedes parallel to the Volvo. The male in that couple was also a blonde however his hair was a more lightened blonde. His stance screamed authority telling me that he was the leader of this coven. The woman had a light brown hair colour that reflected gold in some places-a caramel colour. Her hand was toying with Edward's unruly hair in a motherly attempt to straighten it.

This was the coven they belonged too.

My observation took less than two seconds-just enough time for me to return the gesture before I took off at a quick pace to meet my own family. I was slightly worried about Mom finding out about the vampires but she would do eventually. There is no way Alice would go unnoticed. I had to admit that she would probably find out about my true identity today as well. I'd contemplated all of this already and just decided to let fate lead its course.

I reached my destination in time to hear a horn sound from a midnight blue pick-up that Charlie borrowed for his distant fishing trips. I felt my cheeks tighten at the strain of my smile as I watched my mom jump from the passenger side and make her way over to me before she scooped me into a hug. I giggled as she spun my around. It had only been a week, but still.

"Can I get a hug now?" I heard Charlie's gruff voice sound from somewhere behind Mom. I peeked around her shoulder and saw Grandpa stood awkwardly with his hands out in front of him and his moustache twitching. I giggled and ran into his embrace forgetting that he wasn't as sturdy as Bella was. He staggered back but remained upright as I felt his throaty chuckle sound from his chest.

I buried my face in his neck, "I missed you, Grandpa."

"I've missed you too, Kid." He replied before loosening his arms from around me, "Where to first?"

"Well, I was thinking we could go visit my classrooms first, then we can head over to the cafeteria, and then I'll show you the library before we go over to the main hall to mean with the Dean and Vice principal, teachers and where parents can mingle with other parents." I told them my plan "Is that okay with you, _Dad_?" I teased.

He smirked before he held out his arm for me to take. I threaded my arm through it and looked up at my mom who was smiling down at me. We walked through the grounds for a while, my mind set on showing Grandpa my dorm first. Fate seemed to have a different plan for me though as soon as we entered the lobby of the building. Mom stiffened and inhaled deeply through her nose before I saw the defensive vampire instinct flash in her eyes. She turned to look down at me and I knew she'd seen my guilty expression as I lowered my gaze to the floor, "When were you going to tell me?" She demanded.

At that point, Grandpa (who still held onto my arm) turned to observe the exchange going on between us.

"Mom, I didn't know how to bring it up, but they're not bad!" I argued, "They-"

"Wait, 'they'? There's more than one?" She questioned; her anger building. I knew from past experience that, yes, some of her anger was directed at me, but the majority of it came from the situation we faced. I'd anticipated this very reaction right from the beginning, "I can only smell what appears to be a female, so tell me, Renesmee, how many are there and why haven't you told me about them?"

Grandpa finally realised the direction of our conversation and his eyes lit with understanding. He spluttered on nothing but his voice before he strung together his sentence, "There's...you know...some here?" He looked behind him as if expecting them to be stood directly behind us.

Despite, mine and my mother's nature, he still had trouble processing the supernatural world of vampires and werewolves that he had been sucked into. Most of the time, he hid it well.

"It's a girl who looks my age and her 'brother'." I told her, "That's it except they're 'family' is here today. The girl is in my art class and although I'm keeping my distance as best I can- something you taught me, Mom- she seems a nice girl. I don't talk to her 'brother'; just an occasional greeting now and then when he feels like it, but like I've said, they wouldn't hurt me or Jenna. They think I'm human. Plus, they're vegetarians." I finished my argument with a large exhale, waiting for her reaction.

She looked at me ludicrously for a few seconds before she sighed and said, "I trust your judgement honey, never doubt that; I just worry about you that's all and I know you can handle yourself but I'm your mother and you can't blame me for being protective of you; not with everything that I've seen."

I nodded in understanding and smiled at her acceptance of my strange, sort of unofficial friendship with a fellow vampire.

"Well, now that that's settled, can we move on?" Charlie asked before he pulled me down the corridor not waiting for an answer from either of us. I chuckled to myself at his actions; mom of course heard me and sent me a smile as she walked along side us.

We didn't stay in my room long as I was more eager to show them the different buildings and history I'd learnt from being here. I felt that if I demonstrated all my knowledge and passion to learn, then they wouldn't feel as though they'd made a bad choice in letting me go.

We were walking toward the science building for Biology when I heard a very familiar voice call my name, "Hey Nessie, wait up!"

I turned around to see my best friend walking over to me flagged by two other blonde-haired individuals. All their features were the same apart from the eyes: the female had golden eyes-a sure sign of her diet- but the male had the most incredible green coloured eyes I'd ever seen in my existence. Any human would envy that simple facial feature. The females face was also more prominent and defined than the males, which in turn was more distinct than Jenna's. They were beautiful. The scent that lingered around them and travelled through the wind told me exactly what connection they held to Jenna even if their resemblance did not. This was her family: mother and brother. Mom surprised me by calling out a greeting to Dawn before approaching her and embracing her. Grandpa followed aimlessly behind trying to maintain a safe distance. Both Bella and Dawn immediately started a conversation between themselves, which I though best to ignore as I made my way over to Jenna and her brother. Before introductions could be made by ourselves, Mom and Dawn took care of it as I found myself being introduced to vampire/Mom, Veronica Dawn Hart and hybrid/brother, Justin George Hart.

"Hey, fellow hybrid," Justin greeted pleasantly, "nice to finally meet you."

Justin held out his hand as greeting. I placed my palm in his and watched as he pulled it to his mouth and kissed my knuckles before slyly winking at me. I noticed that his accent held less of a British twang than Jenna's did.

Jenna fabricated a gag before talking, "Ignore my dear brother please. He thinks he's a lady man, which he actually is far from."

Justin smirked, "I'll have you know that I am simply being friendly to another of my kind. Something you are not familiar with, little sis."

Jenna glared which I couldn't help smirking at, "Do _not_ call me little sis; I am older than you and always will be so keep _that_ shut before I knock your teeth out of it." She told him indicating to his mouth which held a devious grin.

"Aww, ain't you just an adorable pussy cat when you're pissed, Jen!" He teased, ruffling her hair, "I'll have you know that for one, I look older; two, no way could you knock my teeth out. My mixed genes equal perfection, just like Nessie's here do too." He added before turning to me.

His expression held playfulness and I know that he was only doing this to wind Jenna up. It was lovely seeing their relationship with my own eyes.

"Okay!" Jenna exclaimed, "Mum, we're going now so he can't embarrass me anymore. _Please_."

Dawn laughed before speaking in a definite British accent, "Okay, Sweetheart." Before turning back to Bella, "We'll carry on this conversation later; it was lovely seeing you again, Bella, Charlie." She then turned to me and offered me a cheek-to-cheek kiss, "I'm so glad to have finally met you, Nessie, I've heard a lot about you. I'll be seeing you again soon, Dear."

Jenna mumbled a small 'goodbye' before she dragged her brother in the opposite direction we were heading. I laughed aloud and knew I'd get some verbal abuse off of Jenna later, but at that moment, I didn't care. My day was going great.

We'd walked around for a couple of hours and both Mom and Grandpa seemed impressed with the school grounds even though Mom had already seen it all before. Grandpa was still positively glowing with pride after both Helen and Timea sung my praise of being an artistic genius, along with Richard who had said he loved having me as his student. They also met the lab technicians and we also bumped into Giselle on the way who queried as to why she hasn't seen much of me recently. We were now heading over to the main hall where more of the students, their families and teachers would be gathered. The Dean was required to give a small speech of welcome before parents got to explore without their children as companions and such.

Charlie and Bella were talking about me between themselves as we reached the doors to the hall. I pushed them open and stepped inside. The smell hit me before my eyes managed to capture the location of its origin. My head snapped in that direction and I saw Alice and Edward along with the other three vampires stood to the left of us in the corner of the hall. I felt my mom move behind me and braced myself to introduce them.

"Mom-" But I was cut off before I could continue to say anything else.

I saw Bella's head snap to look at Alice and her family followed by a sharp intake of breath. For the first time in years I heard Charlie growl like one of us before I heard his angry mumblings and footsteps. Heavily confused I turned my head to look for my family and was taken aback. Grandpa's retreating footsteps told me that he had left the room but to my surprise, my mom had left too.

She has never run before, never. But this time she was gone; the only evidence that remained was the slight swing of the door as it shut behind their exit.

What the hell had just happened?

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><p><strong>ZE MOMENT HAS ARRIVED (sort of anyway) ! DUN DUN DUUUUUUNNNN! WOOP!<strong>

**Now, recently, I noticed an easy review system on a fellow FanFicers story and decided to do something similar. For those who don't have time to write a review or who don't know how to put into words what they want to say, simply copy and paste one or more of the following smiley faces to show what you mean:**

**:D** = Love it once again!

**:)** = Liked this chapter

**:/** = Could have been better

**:(** = Didn't like it this time

**D:** = Preferred a previous chapter

**:'#** = Gah, you bitch! (with this leave a **:)** or a **:(** please, to let me know if you mean this is a joking 'fancy leaving it there' way or a serious 'I hate you' way)

**:*** = Excited for more!

**:{D** = Calmly anticipating more. I can live with the suspense (to a certain degree)

**Note****: If you use these smileys within sentences they will not mean the same thing. This system is for those who want to leave a quick response.**

**Given that it **_**IS**_** my birthday today (Thurs) would you pretty please leave a review as my birthday present? I'm hoping to receive 100 before the real drama kicks in, no pressure, it won't dictate anything, PROMISE!**

**A small Q/A will be posted in A/N next chapter as I had questions about the last chapter but my A/N today is realllly long, so anymore questions then ask and I'll answer.**

**REVIEWS are as adorable as embarrassing brothers and protective mothers... okay, so they're not always adorable but we love 'em all the same :D**

**Sorry for the long notes,**

**Jezzy x**


	14. Chapter 14

**Thank you lovely people for the lovely messages! Over 20 reviews! That's the most I've ever had guys thank you so much! Keep it up? :D**

**Regarding some questions asked by missa78rat from Chapter 12, I will clarify: Edward cannot see the resemblance because he doesn't want to see it given that it's only been 10 years, to him it's impossible for Bella to have a 19 year old daughter as they don't know about hybrids, hence why he thinks she's human and he doesn't need a reason to be reminded of her. If you didn't realise, they think there's a chance she's dead because Alice can't see her. Yes, she may smell different but she resembles a human more than a vampire. **

**Anymore questions let me know and I'll answer them either in an A/N or via PM.**

**BPOV's making a comeback now. Un beta'd. Enjoy!**

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><p><strong>:Twilight character names belong to Stephenie Meyer. All characterisations, plot lines, descriptions and additional details belong to the respective author. No copying or reproduction of this work is permitted without personally written authorisation. ©2011 Jezzyem, [1404/12]. All rights reserved worldwide.**

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><p><span>BPOV<span>

Renesmee's entire bodily reaction to our presence gleamed with excitement. She was so happy to have both Charlie and I here with her. Part of me thought that she enjoyed playing the facade, too. She got easily amused by the human's reaction to me in particular.

She was leading us to her room; the first of many places she wanted to show us whilst we were here. I already knew where we were going but I let her lead because this was about her after all. She opened the door to the lobby and the wind it created blew different scents through the air. I automatically took a quick breath and felt myself stiffen at that distinct vampire fragrance that lingered faintly in the air. I inhaled deeply to get a better fix on it. The scent was more floral than spice; female. Danger lurked around every corner where vampires were concerned and now the scent was asserted to memory I felt my instincts kick in. Remembering where I stood and who I was with, I forced myself to calm before I turned to look at my daughter. Her head was lowered slightly avoiding eye contact as her face held a sheepish expression. She knew what I had just discovered, "When were you going to tell me?" I demanded.

"Mom, I didn't know how to bring it up, but they're not bad!" She argued, "They-"

One word sprung out at me from her explanation, "Wait, 'they'? There's more than one?" I questioned. I couldn't keep the anger out of my tone; try as I might to sound calm. This damned situation that we find ourselves in. Aside from Dawn and the Amazonians there was no other vampire I trusted. I fought so hard to keep Nessie from the dangers of the world that we lived in. I couldn't bear the thought of losing her and she knew this which is why she requested independence. Fate throwing others into the equation didn't help matters and that is what angered me. The realisation that Renesmee kept this from me hurt.

"I can only smell what appears to be a female, so tell me, Renesmee, how many are there and why haven't you told me about them?" I demanded again

Charlie must have realised what we were talking about as he spluttered on nothing but his voice before managed to ask, "There's...you know...some here?" My silence must have given him his answer. I was too focused on my daughter.

"It's a girl who looks my age and her 'brother'." She told me, "That's it except they're 'family' is here today. The girl is in my art class and although I'm keeping my distance as best I can- something you taught me, Mom- she seems a nice girl. I don't talk to her 'brother'; just an occasional greeting now and then when he feels like it, but like I've said, they wouldn't hurt me or Jenna. They think I'm human. Plus, they're vegetarians." She exhaled and looked at me assessing my reaction.

Vegetarian vampires for me seemed safer than the average vampire but that didn't mean they didn't pose a risk. It relieved me to know that Ness hadn't deliberately gone out of her way to make 'friends' with these two vampires and had kept her distance. Not drawing attention to herself was the key to keeping the secret and she obviously knew this. A sense of pride washed through me as I knew my daughter was being precautious on her own. The vampire's hadn't done anything yet and she did say they thought she was human. I saw a slight falter in Nessie's expression and realised that she thought I was disappointed with her and didn't trust her. I immediately corrected her, "I trust your judgement honey, never doubt that; I just worry about you that's all and I know you can handle yourself but I'm your mother and you can't blame me for being protective of you; not with everything that I've seen."

She nodded at me and smiled. Knowing that vampires were close by, I checked to make sure my shield was strong. Whoever I was with was protected at all times and I automatically covered Charlie and Renesmee whenever they were close enough. It was natural to do so now.

"Well, now that that's settled, can we move on?" Charlie asked before he pulled Renesmee down the corridor not waiting for an answer from either of us. I heard Nessie chuckle and sent her a smile showing that I understood.

We stayed long enough to show Charlie the room but Ness was more eager to show us the rest of the school site and introduce us to her teachers. She talked as we walked and listened intently to everything she was saying. Her face beamed and it was clear to see how much she enjoyed being here.

Biology had been her favourite subject through high school and it still was now. That was where we were heading when a familiar voice call Renesmee. We turned and I noticed Jenna first leading Dawn and Justin over to us. I spoke with Dawn on a regular basis and we'd met a couple of times, swiftly becoming friends. We could talk to each other but we had yet to talk about our pasts; we didn't hold that amount of trust just yet. One time, she'd bought Justin with her and we'd spoken about his powers, Jenna and Renesmee. One thing I liked about Justin was the fierce protectiveness that was etched unknowingly in his voice when he talked about Jenna and his mom. His green eyes blazed whenever the subject of them constantly moving came about. I didn't know the back story too much only that they have to move around a lot regarding something that happened a few years ago.

"Dawn. It's lovely to see you again." I greeted, walking over to her and embracing her loosely.

"Likewise, Bella." She replied before we separated. "How are you finding the school?"

"Well, I think it's wonderful, but I haven't met any of the teachers yet, have you?" I asked

She smirked, "Well, the one teacher I have met tried to keep his ogling discrete but he did say Jenna was one of his best students in the class. Joseph, his name was, one of the biology teachers." I chuckled in response. We'd gone out for 'coffee' last week and the poor sales assistant could hardly string a word together when he took our order and blushed furiously when I asked him kindly to stop staring at our chests. "He did say though, that her and Renesmee Swan talk among themselves often but doesn't comment because they always seem to get their work complete."

"Speaking of which, Ness," I turned to my daughter, "This is Dawn Hart, Jenna's mom and her brother, Justin. Dawn this is my beautiful daughter, Renesmee Swan and my dad, Charlie."

Dawn shook Renesmee's and Charlie hand before her, Charlie and I talked briefly about the upcoming holidays

"What do you do for Thanksgiving usually, and Christmas?" Charlie asked pleasantly.

"Well, we don't celebrate thanksgiving and for Christmas it's usually just us in whatever place we are in at the time. I have no idea what we're doing this year but I think we owe Shane a visit." She explained.

Charlie quickly suggested, "You should come to us! Bells cooks up a mean dinner even though she can't eat it. There's usually just me, Nessie, Jake and Billy that eat it before some other guys come down. You three should come along and bring Shane too if you'd like."

I gapped openly at my dad. He'd obviously become taken with Dawn very quickly.

"Thanks Charlie! I'll talk to Shane and let you know-."

"Mum, we're going now so he can't embarrass me anymore. _Please_." Jenna complained. Her eyes screamed it.

Dawn laughed before speaking in a definite British accent, "Okay, Sweetheart." Before turning back to me and saying, "We'll carry on this conversation later; it was lovely seeing you again, Bella, Charlie." She then turned to Renesmee and offered a kiss, "I'm so glad to have finally met you, Nessie, I've heard a lot about you. I'll be seeing you again soon, Dear."

Jenna mumbled a small 'goodbye' before she dragged her brother in the opposite direction we were heading. Nessie laughed at Jenna and Dawn offered me a wave before we proceeded to head to the see Renesmee's classrooms.

What the science block offered was immense. I was introduced to two lab technicians, Elaine and Kyle before I was taken into the classroom and I was formally introduced to Mr. Ogle also known as Joseph who said exactly the same to me as what he'd said to Dawn. He didn't appear to be ogling me but he should have been directing his attention at Charlie as he was suppose to be playing parent; I was Nessie's '22 year old sister who was visiting'. At least Richard, her other Biology teacher was more professional and spoke about how she had progressed and how he loved having her as his student. Renesmee's arm was linked through mine as Charlie spoke to him and I squeezed it to let her know how proud I was of her.

We had to be at the hall soon so Ness decided to show us some other buildings and 'cool stuff' as we travelled back in that direction. We started heading back that way only to bump into Giselle, a woman from the music department. She didn't say much because she had to go but she was another one who spoke praises, "Miss Swan, why have I not heard you use the auditorium piano yet?" She turned to Charlie then, "You're daughter has an amazing talent that I genuinely wish was shared in my lessons." She scolded, "Don't be a stranger, Swan."

Charlie turned to look at Nessie, "Is she always like that?"

Nessie shrugged, "She's a musician, what do you expect?"

I chuckled at her response. It would have been something I would have said. Charlie looked at me then and winked obviously thinking the same thing. He often said that Renesmee and I were like two peas in a pod; bound together by blood and love that would be impossible to corrupt despite my fears.

"Mom, that's Helen over there, my art teacher," Nessie told me enthusiastically pointing her finger at a woman stood talking to another, "Can I introduce you?"

She already knew that answer to that and began dragging me along behind her. We spent the next ten minutes talking to Helen and Timea about Renesmee's progress and talent that she has for the subject often referring to her as a 'top student' and 'one of the most prospective in the class'. Statements like that made Charlie practically beam with pride along with me.

Charlie's relationship with his granddaughter was a lovely thing: he was fiercely protective of her as he was the father figure in her life, he loved her unconditionally, he still used his police chief exterior when he talked to her about crime and correct morals but he always left the discipline to me (not that she was a disobedient child to begin with) and spoilt her rotten despite both our protests. I often thought that he secretly liked the facade we had to perform to public eyes.

The time for us to go toward the hall approached and Renesmee walked in front of us as Charlie began to speak to me, "She seems to be doing really well here." He mused.

"Yeah, she is." I commented as I watched her stroll closer to the hall, I think we made a good choice in letting her go, Dad."

He smiled, "Me too, Kid." No matter how much older Charlie became, or the fact that I myself had a grown daughter; he made it evident that I was his little girl and always would be.

I walked through the double doors behind Charlie and went to stand beside Renesmee. I noticed her change in posture before anything else and went to comment on it.

Taking a breath in order to talk I tasted the sweet female aroma of the vampire that I had clearly imprinted into my mind.

Nessie called to me but I couldn't register what she was saying as my head snapped up in the direction of where she stood. I don't know how long I was stood there for but I stared my mind processes taking longer than usual. When it finally clicked at who I was looking at I drew in sharply in pure shock. Pain invaded my body as I looked at the small black-haired vampire who was my former closest friend. Beside her stood tall was Jasper. I looked slightly to the left and saw the back of his head; his bronze hair reflecting light beams that shimmied down from the overhead lights. I couldn't look anymore; it was too much for me. Seeing him stood there had me quickly moving from the building before they could notice who came through the door.

Outside I drew in a ragged breath trying to use the cool breeze to make me sane. Behind me I heard Charlie's footsteps along with incoherent rambling he usually did as a result of anger.

"What the _hell_ are _they_ doing _here_?" He asked no one in particular. Venom -metaphorically- laced his voice; pure, unadulterated loathing seeped through each syllable, "They have no right to even be in this _state_ let alone within a 5,000 miles radius of us."

I understood what he was saying. I didn't want the here anymore than he did, not with everything they put me through. Whilst Charlie was raging to himself I was thinking; Renesmee had said that there was a girl and her 'brother', I now knew that the girl was Alice. Jasper would never be introduced as her brother and Emmett wasn't with them leaving one 'brother'. Edward was the one attending college with Alice.

Charlie continued his raging and he paced, "_They_ drew you in and did _nothing_ but let you fall on your ass and leave you in a mess that _they_ created and now what? They're _not _going to do the same thing to Nessie too; _nuh uh_, not over my dead body-"

"Nessie." I whispered. I very rarely called her that but my beautiful daughter filled every single one of my thoughts as he mentioned her.

Was _she_ aware of who the Cullen's really were? No, she would have said so.

Did they know who _she_ really was? If they did they made her believe they didn't know. White hot anger pulsed through my body. I'd done my best to protect my daughter and they'd done nothing but run away. I'll be damned if they try anything. At one point in my past the Cullen's meant the world to me. Now, Renesmee was my world and that's all that mattered to me. Her hurt was my hurt and they will not hurt her like they hurt me. Experiencing it myself was one thing; thinking of my daughter going through that would be even worse. I suddenly realised how Charlie must have felt in through my little bout of depression and felt guilty that I had made him like that.

But how could Renesmee not know of the relation she shared with them? I'd given her the book two months ago and she'd always been highly curious since she was born. For the first time since being a vampire I felt a nostalgic feeling that Nessie had kept this entire thing from me but I refused to let myself believe it even a small fraction.

The door re-opened and closed and I looked up and into the brown eyes that stared back at me. I looked over her face and all that I saw there was confusion and worry. A sense of relief washed through me at the same time the sickness reared for a different reason.

Her eyebrows furrowed as she took in my expression and I ran to her, a sob escaping my throat as I wrapped my arms around her neck and buried my face in her curly hair. Her arms constricted around my waist.

She hadn't read the book. I knew that as soon as she walked through the doors and I saw her face. She hadn't seen the photos or read what I had written in that folder. She had no idea. That's why I felt relieved. But at the same time I felt sick. In the time that she'd been here with them around her, she'd drew her own opinions about them and possibly created friendships with them too. That's what I wanted her to do, hence, why I'd never told her directly but I'd always assumed she'd never meet them. Now she had, I didn't want this to cloud her judgement of them.

She didn't have a choice now. She _had_ to read that book before the end of the day.

-o0o-

R/N POV

_She has never run before, never. But this time she was gone; the only evidence that remained was the slight swing of the door as it shut behind their exit._

_What the hell had just happened?_

I stared at the door contemplating what had happened and came up with nothing. I turned back and looked over at Alice and her family; they were stood talking to each other, not paying attention to anyone else in the room. They'd done nothing to provoke that type of reaction from neither Grandpa nor Mom. So why did they leave? It couldn't have been anyone else in the room for Jenna's family wasn't here yet and they wouldn't have that reaction. As if sensing my gaze, Alice lifted her head and looked at me, her gold eyes fixating on mine and judging my facial expression trying to figure me out. I saw her eyes flicker to look over my shoulder obviously sensing something. Or she was wondering why I was alone when the rest of the students were surrounded by a family member. The caramel haired woman looked up at me following Alice's gaze and offered me a compassionate smile before asking Alice who I was. Of course I could hear it along with Alice's reply but I couldn't make that known.

Dazed and confused I turned around and left the hall. Opening the door to go outside I saw my mom looking down with her eyes closed and Charlie pacing frantically; his breathing was harsh and uneven and his face had turned a deep crimson colour. Mom's head snapped up to look at me and the emotion that played in her usually bright eyes was unexpected. I couldn't find a suitable emotion to attach to what was displayed on her face. Her eyes brimmed red and I felt my brows furrow. She ran to me and a sob escaped her throat as she wrapped her arms around my neck. I immediately secured my arms around her waist but I couldn't speak. Words evaded me and I couldn't comprehend anything that was happening. I was missing something drastic.

Mom shook in my arms and she sobbed a tearless cry on my shoulder. She took a deep breath then pulled away from me. Her hands came up to cup my cheeks and her eyes flickered frantically as she searched each of my own eyes individually assessing what she could. I reached up to place my hands over hers and my questions as to why she left the room and what happened along with many more danced across her mind.

Her face crumpled again so I immediately removed my hands from hers but she didn't remove hers from my face.

Grandpa spoke before either one of us did, "Nessie, we're leaving and you're coming with us. You're not staying here anymore, not with them." His eyes were blazed and his moustache twitched; a sure sign of his red emotions.

What he said flowed through my brain and forced words out of my mouth in the form of a protest, "What! _Why_?"

I looked over at Mom for back-up or an explanation or something but found her looking down with her eyes closed.

"You're not staying here anymore." Charlie shouted. Spit flying from his mouth as he spoke, "_That's final_!"

"Dad," Bella spoke. Her eyes were still closed. She slowly dropped her hands from my face but took one of mine in her own not willing to break the contact, "Stop. It's not our decision to make."

Mom's soft voice contrasted Grandpa's loud, vicious snarling, "You're honestly going to let her stay when the Cu-"

"Dad!" Bella interrupted, her eyes flying open, "She _has_ to know eventually. If she wants to come home after she knows then that's fine but we can't make the decision for her. It's her life."

If I didn't find their conversation serious I'd have asked them to stop referring to me in the third person but instead I asked, "What do I have to know?" My voice was feeble. A small shadow of fear crept its way up my back evoking a shiver in me.

Mom didn't answer and kept her gaze locked on Charlie waiting for him to speak. He huffed and put a palm to his forehead before dragging it down his face and combing his moustache, "Fine. But you are _not_ stopping me from talking to Jake about protection, understand?"

"Completely." Mom replied before turning to look at me, "Nessie, I need you to listen to me now." She began, "Your Grandpa and I have to leave urgently and you'll know why soon, I promise. If I tell you myself you'll see things differently and biasly and I don't want that.

"Now, do you remember that book I told you about; the one that resembles a portfolio folder?" She asked me keeping her eyes locked on mine. I nodded in response, not trusting my voice, "I need you to read it before anything else you do. You need to go back to your room and read it. I thought you would have done by now what with you and your curiosity." She said with a small smile.

"Curiosity killed the cat." I retorted meekly.

"This time it's okay to kill the cat." She told me seriously, "I need you to read it and when you're ready to talk, call me and I'll be there in a flash."

I nodded to her not really understanding. She pulled me into another hug and kissed the crown of my head, "I love you _so_ much, Renesmee; my little girl."

Tears brimmed my eyes. It was clear as ice that my mother was hurting and whenever she hurt, so did I. We were two peas in a pod; so similar in everything.

Mom pulled away abruptly and looked up at the door, "Dad, we have to leave. _Now_." Blatantly frantic, she then pointed at my and told Charlie, "Mask my scent."

Charlie pulled me into a hug and I felt him breathe in my hair before he let me go and kissed my cheek. Mom grabbed hold of his hand and blew me a kiss before she practically dragged Charlie across the lot and around the corner.

I stood there completely lost in everything when I heard the door open behind me. My mind was too pre-occupied to notice who stood behind me.

"Nessie, are you okay?" She asked. I turned around to find Alice looking at my intently, "Have you been crying?" She asked. She took a step forward toward me. Acting on instinct I countered it and took a step back. Alice looked at me confused.

"I'm sorry, Alice, I have to go." I told her.

I couldn't stay there anymore. I turned on my heel and stalked quickly back to my dorm. A low rumble of a truck sound in the parking lot but I couldn't see anything.

Today was supposed to be about my family seeing what I did here and how much I loved it. Instead, something caused them to run away and the only explanation was the vampires stood in the hall as my mom entered. There was a secret somewhere; a secret that had been kept in a box in many people's mind that had now been discovered but remained unopened. My mom had given me the key to unlock it and told me that curiosity didn't matter in this case. That was unlike her.

Something had deeply upset my mother and Charlie. And it was something to do with Alice's coven...of that I was sure.

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><p><strong>Okay, Just to clarify: the Cullen's did NOT see Bella or Charlie stood in the hall. <strong>

**It seemed the smiley faces were a hit but we didn't quite reach the anticipated 100 make it possible?**

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**I've updated this really quickly but that's because I had time today to write the chapter. I have really important exams coming up next month so my main focus will be on them. Once they're over I promise to dedicate my time to this story and have another one sorted for you, my lovelies, to enjoy. I'll try and get an update in May but I highly doubt I'll be able too until June and for that, I am so sorry but FanFiction won't get me into a university; good grades will :D**

**Love Jezzy x**


	15. Chapter 15

***Pen name has been changed to Jezzyem for those who are unaware. Past disclaimers still apply.**

**Note****: Italics are the letters**

**:Twilight character names belong to Stephenie Meyer. All characterisations, plot lines, descriptions and additional details belong to the respective author. No copying or reproduction of this work is permitted without personally written authorisation. ©2011 Jezzyem, [11/06/12]. All rights reserved worldwide**

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><p>I could feel Alice's gaze lingering on my back as I hastily retreated in the direction of my room. I didn't feel it leave until I rounded the first corner. My mind was in a whirlwind of emotional thoughts and possibilities - none of which had a plausible origin or outcome. I tried to diminish my confusion with the simple thought of the task my mother had asked me to carry out: read the book. It obviously held more than what I originally thought it did.<p>

The trek to the dorm seemed longer than usual despite my faster-than-human pace. I obviously couldn't go to full lengths given that student's parents were still idling around the campus with their children, happily absorbing the sights surrounding them. Thinking that made me feel a wave of sorrow at the knowledge that Mom and Grandpa had to leave earlier than originally anticipated and I had no idea why. The breeze picked up and nipped my cheeks making my skin burn with its icy chill. It swept through my hair and made me feel as bleak as my mood. There was so much more that I wanted to show them both. I wanted to show them the work I had done already and how much I had progressed without my teachers comments. I wanted to show them the oak piano in Giselle's classroom and the auditorium where I planned to play a snippet of a new song that I had been writing, inspired by my new curve in life. I wanted them to witness how much passion I held by being here.

My thoughts were interrupted when I saw the doors that led to my building directly in front of me. Moving towards them, I almost collided with an individual that stepped out ahead of me. I muttered a pathetic apology and headed to my dorm. Unlocking the door, I threw the key at the counter of my desk and heard the distinct noise of it stabbing into the wooden surface. With more care, I pushed the door shut and collapsed onto my bed. The springs of the mattress squeaked in protest at the sudden distribution of my weight; I didn't care. I lay on my back covering my eyes with my right arm. I couldn't make sense of anything. My mind was a jumbled mess. I silently wondered if there was any chance that I could convince Charlie to come back tomorrow. The immediate thought of Charlie triggered the memory of the conversation I held with him barely five minutes ago. I'd never see him so angry before. His eyes had held pure hatred, and even though he could hide some emotions from me; _that_ predominant emotion seeped from his core and spilled over the edge.

Still, I couldn't fathom what had caused a reaction so furious. Granted, there were vampires there but he's met vampires before so what made this time any different? I then remembered my mother's words: _I need you to read it before anything else you do. You need to go back to your room and read it. _The 'book'.

I sat up abruptly and blinked a few times repeating the words in my head: _Before anything else you do._ I whipped my head and looked at the telltale drawer that held the 'book' underneath all my sketches. I dashed to the drawer and knelt down in front of it. My hands reached forward of their own accord; slowly. I couldn't bring myself to move faster as my eyes bored at the closed drawer. What would it tell me?

I took a deep breath and closed my eyes. Before something else could summon in my mind that would distract me, I pulled open the drawer and flung my sketch books to the floor by my side, revealing the same bulky, yellow envelope that I hadn't seen in weeks. On the front, my mom's handwriting hadn't changed or altered, apart from the unnoticeable smudging of the letters given that it had held objects on top of it for so long. I lifted it out carefully with both hands and rocked back on my heels studying it. My back rested against the side of my bed as I crossed my legs on the floor staring at the small scripture on the front. I delicately turned over the package gliding my hand across the paper as I went. Looking at the top corner again I saw the same words as before:

_Please...not when you're merely curious xxx_

It's strange how those words were what prevented me from looking for so long; how at the time, my curiosity had me wanting to shred the paper of the envelope so that I could find out what secret had been given to me. I had been stopped by those simple words. My mother knew me better than anyone and she knew that my curiosity would get the better of me. I never realised that my mom thought those words wouldn't hold me off for as long though. Had she really believed I would have only lasted for about a day? I smiled as I realised that yes, had she not have put those words there, then I would have read the book/folder-thing that very day.

I looked over at the words now and found myself wondering whether it was right to open it or not. My mother had told me to but I hesitated. Wasn't I still being overly curious?

I trampled that thought as soon as it entered my head. I wasn't curious, I was concerned. Bella was upset. Charlie was angry for reasons beyond me. They both left immediately. Plus, she'd told me to read it. Whatever it was that caused my family to react like that was possibly in this envelope. I wasn't curious, I was concerned.

My resolve set, I hooked my finger under the opening and ripped it open. I tipped the envelope upside down and a folder fell out onto my lap. It was very plain – a simple black hardback cover. There wasn't a lot to it in all honesty. I looked at the side and saw that there wasn't much thickness to it either - the packaging was just deceiving. Looking at the stem of the item an indentation of the word '_Album_' could be seen at the very top. Was this a photo album? Well, Mom had referred to it as a book that she'd described as looking as a portfolio (which it did); so that's what I'd stick with.

I stole a few more seconds before I took a deep breath and opened the cover. I didn't know why I was so nervous about it. Maybe it was just the secrecy of it all; I don't know.

The first page I came to was a short letter that had been slotted into the first page via the corner holders. I recognised my mom's handwriting immediately. She'd written formally in a black ink pen; the same that had addressed the envelope. As soon as I read my name at the top of the letter I was immediately drawn in...And that right there meant there was no turning back:

_Renesmee -_

_For a time, certain aspects of my past, as well as yours have been ignored and not mentioned. There has always been a reason for that. But now you take another step forward in the world and although we live differently, I could not be prouder of you for embracing your independence and discovering yourself. I suppose, some would call it stubbornness – a trait I believe you've inherited from me- but we both know that it's not. I've come to realise that you need to know the secret that you are craving to know so much; where the other half of you comes from. It goes without saying that it's a touchy subject for me and I know exactly how your mind works. This is why I'm presenting it to you this way; as a book. This way you'll create your own opinions and not have my judgement clouding your own. _

_Just remember that I love you always,_

_Mom_

Part of me understood what that meant whilst a part of me still remained confused. I re-read the opening letter again and my eyes still on the words 'other half of you'. I could hear my own heartbeat racing but I didn't want to get my hopes up. My mom rarely kept secrets but there were a few that she wouldn't -_couldn't_- share with me. No matter, all would reveal itself; of that I was certain.

Turning the page I was presented with a dated painting, or at least a copied photograph of one. Studying it closely I could make out golden clothing that appeared to be dated to an earlier century, probably the 1700's, on four figures. They were all stood slightly separated on a balcony looking in different directions. The man who stood centre had black hair that had been scraped back and, on closer inspection, blood red eyes. Those of vampires.

I blinked wondering if I was wrong. I darted my eyes across the other figures to find that all of them had red eyes except the one on the left. He was stood further back that the others and his demeanour was slouched showing that the other three held superiority. This man had golden eyes. On the painting he could have passed for a human, however, the chalky white skin was the same as the other men told me differently.

Underneath the photo was more of my mother's handwriting on a separate piece of paper secured to the page:

_The most important person in the picture at the moment is the blond on the far left. The other three are the Volturi leaders. I don't know much about them but that'll be a talk for another time. The blond on the left is named Carlisle-_

There was more but that was the only piece of information I needed to figure the rest out. I remember Senna telling me some about Carlisle; not much, but that little bit that I needed: "_The leader of the coven your mother was going to join."_

"_Carlisle is the leader of a coven that once lived in Forks; the coven your father was part of; your father's family."_

I knew exactly what this book was now.

I hesitantly turned the next page and my eyes widened to an abnormal size. I was aware that my mouth was hanging open but my brain wouldn't cooperate with the function necessary for closing it. For smiling back at me was none other than Alice! I gaped at the photo I was looking at. Alice was looking at the camera apparently laughing. She looked exactly the same in the photo as she did now. The only difference was that she appeared more carefree in the photo than any time I'd seen her. Thousands of thoughts soared through my mind that I couldn't answer. I desperately craved an explanation as to why I was looking at a photo of Alice. No description was left behind about this photo.

Underneath that photo though was another. Alice was present but stood next to her was a tall blonde guy. The guy wasn't Carlisle but he _was_ another vampire. He stood tall and kept his back straight with a neutral expression on his face. His lips were curled up a fraction and there was light in his eyes. Stood next to Alice, they looked the perfect couple. Alice was leaning into him with their arms wrapped around each other's waist as they posed for the picture. The only thing that accompanied this photo was the names, _Alice and Jasper Cullen._

Not gaining anything other than confusion, I turned the next page and was met by two more couples. The top couple I didn't recognise: a statuesque, blonde female that held all the glamour associated with perfection; golden curled locks, vibrant round eyes, a pointed petite nose and plump symmetrical lips. The only thing that killed her beauty was her monotonous expression - pure ice. Stood next to her, in a similar pose to Alice and Jasper, was a tall, muscular male who was opposite to his partner. His hair was a deep brunette that lay in small, tight curls on his head. It reminded me of Charlie's except this person's were less visible as he wore his hair cut closer to his scalp. Despite his intimidating size, the playful look he held on his face deflected any hard reflection that would usually accompany his build. The dimples in his cheeks and his large smile completely distorted that image. The polar opposites stood close, and the way there bodies were aliened screamed love. The names written were, _Rosalie and Emmett Cullen_ in Mom's neat script.

I did a double take on the photo underneath. It was another photo of Carlisle but this time he looked more modern and I could get a better picture of his face. He too was blond, but his features stayed small on a round face. Stood next to him was a woman with sun-kissed brown hair that flowed down her back. Her features were small on a heart-shaped face, but her eyes were large and expressive. She looked at the camera with compassion. I then realised that I recognised her. She was the woman stood with Alice in the hall. I looked for my mom's handwriting and found, _Esme and Carlisle Cullen_ written as the caption.

My heart plummeted into my stomach and my throat became dry. Understanding dawned on me at that very moment. All their names were Cullen, including Carlisle. Carlisle: the leader of the coven. Father. Family.

This was my 'family'. _Alice_ was my 'family'. The Cullen's were my 'family'.

It was then that another thought became prominent. I was completely unsure how long that thought had been in my mind until I couldn't think of anything to suppress it. I was vaguely aware that there was one _Cullen_ missing, one that hadn't been mentioned yet. I was also aware that none of the males in a couple could have been that one person. The heart breaker. I knew the possibility but I didn't _want_ to think it.

I turned the next page anyway and there he was. _Edward Cullen_. He was sat down looking into the camera having been caught off-guard by the looks of it. His eyes held a playful, charming attitude that I'd never seen on his vacant features around campus. I also happened to recognise where he was. He was in _our_ house; the kitchen, being more specific. He was sat at one of the chairs to the table that still lived in that kitchen. One thing I did notice about this page that differed from the others, was the fact that that photo had a page to itself. The actual photo held a dent at the side, like someone had held it too hard, causing it to bend. The name that had been written wasn't as neat as the others had been. The only reason I noticed was because it was my mom who had written it and I knew from those small indicators that is was here that her emotions had gotten the better of her.

I turned the page again and saw two photos that confirmed _everything_. Both photos had two people in them: My mom and Edward, except my mom was human. The first of the two photos was of Edward holding my mom close to him. She had her hands on his chest and she was hiding her face. The tell-tale blush I could see on her cheeks told me she was embarrassed by something. Edward on the other hand had a large grin on his face. Although his body and face were turned towards Bella, his eyes faced the camera and he had a joyous expression on his face. He looked extremely happy, more so in this photo than in the previous one. Across from this photo was the simple caption: _18__th__ birthday party at the Cullen's._

The photo underneath was a complete contrast to the one above it. Yes, both Mom and Edward were in the photo except there expressions and bodies were different. This time it was in the living room and they were both looking at the camera. Whilst Bella was smiling, the light in her eyes held a glaze of worry and concern that she tried to hide. Her smile was true but it looked a little forced. Edward on the other hand looked how I knew him. His 'smile' was a simple, forced curl of the lips. His eyes were vacant and emotionless. They had their arms around each other, except Edward looked as though he held it there for appearance sake. Mom was different; she leaned into him subconsciously. Her hips were wider and her body appeared more curvaceous. A disfigurement to the photo was that there was a crease in the centre of the picture separating them both, like the photo had been folded. She looked more womanly in this human photo of her though compared to others I'd seen. I didn't dwell on it though because it wasn't the most important thing. At that moment, the knowledge that a vampire who had been nothing but a douche since I met him was apparently my biological father, that was the most important thing. I jumped as a droplet of water fell onto the photo. I hadn't realised I had started crying. I caught the last few tears before they fell and turned the page over expecting to have reached the end by now.

Imagine my surprise when I came across another handwritten letter. Looking over the sheets of paper my mom had used to write the letter clearly told me a story without even reading the words. The paper was crumpled in parts. Certain words were smudged and more often than not, ink splatters partially covered some words and blank parts of the paper. I blinked back tears forcefully, suppressing the hurt I felt just thinking about my mother's apparent upset, and began to read her words:

_My dear daughter –_

_I'm sorry if I've gone the wrong way about this. Jake told me that he thought telling you this way was stupid and that it would be much easier to just tell you face-to-fac. But I know you better than he does, and it's because of that that I've done it this way. See, this topic of conversation is painful for me, it always has been, even now after a decade has passed. My emotions aren't as easy to overcome as you'd expect because the circumstances that led me to being without them were excruciating and I still don't fully understand it, or them._

_That being said, it's easier this way because then my emotions won't stop you from making a decision for yourself because I know that me being upset makes you upset and I don't want you to witness that, baby. The thing is, this is where you're vampire side comes from: your gifts, you're hair, you're curiosity. His name is Edward and I say 'is' because there's no chance he could be dead, not even in memory. He's your biological father. Before I carry on, if you come to the decision that you want to find him and meet him then don't hesitate to ask; don't spare my feelings because if that's what you want then I'll help you as much as I can. You have my blessing to look for him._

_My story with the Cullen's began happy, until my 18__th__ birthday - that's when things changed, but I'll start from the beginning because it's time you understood and knew everything. _

_I first met them in Forks High, when I first moved into Charlie's, in junior year. Everyone knew the Cullen kids but they were quite secluded. I ended up being Edward's lab partner in Biology and at first he was really off with me and I thought I'd accidently done something wrong. He avoided talking to me as much as he could until one day I was nearly hit by a van and it just so happened that Edward managed to get there in time and stop it from hitting me. He was stood nowhere near me and he tried to convince me that he was stood right next to me at the time and that I didn't remember because I'd hit my head. I wasn't stupid though, and after going to La Push and being told some legends, I figured out what they were. He didn't lie to me, of course. It turned out that he was a mind-reader and that I was the only mind he couldn't read which made him curious about me. Then to top it off, he'd never been as affected by anyone's blood before me either. He wanted to kill me, but he didn't; he saved me. The night I found out for definite what him and his family were, I was in Port Angeles and was cornered by some drunken men. He saved me._

_As soon as he shared his secret I knew that I loved him unconditionally. He expected me to be scared of him by showing me his strength and speed, even telling me about how Alice could see the future and Jasper could control emotions. But nothing could keep me away from him or him away from me. And he told me many times in return how much I meant to him. Even after the accident that gave me my scar he told me, and he stayed with me after and I honestly thought he loved me. I thought they all did: Alice, Emmett, Esme, Carlisle, even Jasper. Not so much Rosalie._

_I don't know what I did to make them leave me, I honestly don't and if I knew I'd probably understand better. In a sense I do understand; I knew I could never measure up to them but still I'd built a relationship with every single one of them. I guess the difference between our species was too great to carry on. The only one to say goodbye was him and even then his words broke me completely. He told me he didn't want me and that was the worst part, knowing that all along our entire relationship had been a lie and that hurt-_

I slammed the book closed with a resounding thwack before launching it forward and away from me. It hit the wall then bounced open on the floor with an echoing thump, thump. Tears cascaded freely; sobs rippled from my throat and I could do nothing to stop it. Upset, hurt, anger. I felt for my mom so much that it hurt me reliving everything that she went through. I couldn't read anymore because I knew it'd get worse. I'd seen the pain on her face in the past when this subject was questioned. I'd seen her face today after she saw them.

Oh my god, she saw them. After ten years, to know they were so close. I cried a new round of tears into the palms of my hands as I curled my body inwards on the floor of my room.

My phone buzzed on my nightstand but I ignored it and wept. It wasn't long after that I heard the door open and close again. The silent footsteps didn't worry me nor did the presence of someone stood by my side. I felt them sit down beside me and wrap their arms around me. I fell into them not caring anymore because they were the one person I needed.

"Why didn't you tell me before?" I sobbed

I felt her kiss my hair and rub my back soothingly "I'm sorry, baby. I'm sorry."

I tried to gather my bearings as I could hear the anguish in her voice and it wasn't them causing it this time, it was me, "It's not your fault, Mom, it's _there's_! Please don't say sorry when you've done _nothing_ to apologise for! God, I feel so stupid! How could I not have suspected anything at all! I sat with her and went to a party and have been nice when all along, she...they've-"

I burst into fresh sobs; sobs that racked my chest and caused my ribs to ache. Bella held me tighter in response simply kissing my hair and my forehead before resting her cheek against it. How could I have been so stupid? I let them in and I could see the signs now: why I was always cautious, their conversation, I even looked like him. That thought made me sick.

I sniffled, "Can you tell me?" I asked softly "About when they left. What did he say to you; what happened?"

She sighed into my hair, "I can't, baby, I'm sorry, not when you're like this. I'll break down and it'll make you worse because we both hate seeing the other upset. That's why I told you the way I did."

She kissed me again before she continued, "Listen, you've obviously built a friendship with Alice-" I lifted my head to protest but she beat me to it, "No, let me finish. Alice was a good friend to me and I don't want to ruin that for you. At the end of the day _you're_ here because of them-_him_. If you want to get to know them then I can't stop you- I won't."

I gnawed on my bottom lip - a habit from Mom, "No." I told her bluntly; shaking my head "You're the most important person to me, Momma, and knowing what they did to you, how could I look them in the eye? Please, don't try to convince me because I get my stubbornness from you," She smiled at that. "They are not my family. You, Charlie and Jacob are my family. That's all that matters. They are not my friends. Jenna and the pack are. I don't need them in my life."

I hesitated then, wondering if I'd gone too far. I had to ask her but I stuttered, "That is unless...unless _you_ want them in our lives?"

She inhaled sharply and hugged me close, "I have you. You're the only person I need. I love you so much, Renesmee Swan."

"Am I named after her?" She knew which one I was referring too.

"Yes, Renee and Esme."

I laid my head against her chest and closed my eyes, feeling the tears come again, "I love you too, Mom."

"Promise?"

"Promise." I confirmed, "Always?"

She chuckled, "Always."

She held me as the tears fell. At that moment in time I was _so_ glad Mom couldn't produce any tears, because if she'd been able to, then I would be a whole lot worse.

I cried. I cried for Mom, for Charlie, for me, I even cried at _their_ heartlessness. I just...cried.

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	16. Chapter 16

**:Twilight character names belong to Stephenie Meyer. All characterisations, plot lines, descriptions and additional details belong to the respective author. No copying or reproduction of this work is permitted without personally written authorisation. ©2011 Jezzyem, [19/07/12]. All rights reserved worldwide**

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><p>I remember once, when I was younger, Mom taking me to La Push after I'd begged her more that week than any before. We'd stood on the cliff staring at the crashing waves as the wind whipped around us. I'd shivered, but nothing affected me at that moment in time- it was just me and Mom. For years, we'd visited the beach with the pack accompanying us; a place we could go to and not worry about recognition or being discovered. We'd share a seat on some driftwood and watch twilight fall into night, witnessing which phase of the moon appeared among the stars. One particular day had a rare spell of sunshine and while I was in transfixed at Mom's glittering skin, I gave myself the desire to experience the rush of what I was seeing. Watching the boys-including Jake- plummet from the cliff into the ocean water to then emerge with grins covering their faces; I wanted to do that. Never having done anything that reckless before because we didn't know to what extent my body could endure hardships like a vampire, I never even tried to do anything that hazardous. I begged and pleaded with Mom to let me do it just once. She'd refused at first, but when I reminded her that Seth was still young and was participating, she'd relented. I remembered that day as I stood by her side staring blankly at the fall below. Mom was talking to me telling me that I could always change my mind but I couldn't exactly hear her; the sound of the waves dominated my senses. I wasn't until I'd felt her hand take hold of mine that I turned to face her.<p>

"We can always go back." She'd told me. The look in her eyes told me that she secretly hoped I would have done. It was because of that look that I told her I didn't want to.

I'd looked at the ocean again and told her the truth, "I feel so stupid. I asked to do this and now I'm up here hesitating about it."

"It's okay to be scared, Sweetie. You may not be totally human but you still think like one. Everyone's afraid of something, even me." She reassured.

I would have asked her to elaborate on her fears if I knew I wasn't stalling. So I'd told her I wasn't afraid, "I'm not afraid, not really. It's just that, I don't know what it's going to feel like, or how I'm going to fair at the end."

"It's the unknown." She told me. With a small inclination of her head, Jake stepped from behind us, offered me a cheeky grin before he jumped. I watched his dive, holding my breath until I saw him emerge and look up at us.

"We can't know everything." She began again, "They'll come a time when we all need to make decisions based on the present and not worry about the consequences because we don't know how things will turn out. It's just a case of taking the chance and seeing how things will work out, or not take the risk and save yourself the strain. Of course, then you'd get the 'what if's'."

She let go of my hand and took a step back. She smiled at me reassuringly and nodded. That smile told me that it was my time to make that choice. Before hesitation could creep in again, I turned and leapt in the air over the edge; my heart hammering in my ears as I took the risk. The fall was graceful and exhilarating. I hit the water and heard the muffled sound of a second fall. Mom was right behind me.

Decisions like that had only come once before, and that was the decision to come to College. I never figured that once I was at College that I would be faced with another decision again - one that affected more than just me. I had the choice now after embracing the knowledge of my vampire heritage; either I could ignore the situation and carry on as normal, or I could ignore _them_ and pretend they never existed. The problem - that was affecting my ultimate decision - was that I didn't know which one fell under the 'risk' category. Remembering that day, I knew that my mom would be with me all the way - she'd proved that enough times in my life.

There was, of course, a third option and that was to acknowledge them and tell them who I am – get to know them- but I thwarted that idea. Bella and Charlie meant the world to me and I knew what having the 'Cullens' in our life would do to them emotionally.

I was sat up in my bed again, the thick duvet pulled up around my waist. My back was propped up with the pillows and I was sketching absentmindedly from my mind's eye; my sketchbook rested on my raised knees. Despite my ability to store more visual images, I preferred landscape sketches because I found that the images from my mind held a strange meaning that I'd processed subconsciously. I never really saw what I was drawing until I'd completed the picture and for the past week of doing nothing but sketch the meanings there were anything but happy: despair, confusion, hate, sorrow... But, sketching was the only thing I could do to pass the time. I hadn't attended any classes for just over a week and today I saw another morning where I was suppose to attend another seminar and another lecture. My professors and friend's were all under the impression I was sick- a message delivered to them by Jenna.

Somehow Jenna knew, and after two days of sitting in my secluded state, she'd pounded on the door demanding entrance. I'd opened the door and she'd thrown herself at me full force asking me how I was. I'd broke down again in her arms and it took a full forty minutes of comforting words, hugs, and ice-cream to fight my emotions enough so that I could fill in the gaps to what she already knew. Turned out that Dawn was Bella's new trusted confident and had relayed instructions to Jenna to check on me because they were worried. The book in question had lain haphazardly splayed on the floor where it was launched; I hadn't considered moving it until Jenna went to retrieve it. She'd sat and filled through the pages; her eyes blazing as she landed on the photos that were revealed. It took five minutes of pleading and reassurance to get her to read the entire final letter to me. She'd hesitated and flat out refused...but I needed to hear it, and I wasn't strong enough to hold myself together as I read it on my own.

_My dear daughter –_

_I'm sorry if I've gone the wrong way about this. Jake told me that he thought telling you this way was stupid and that it would be much easier to just tell you face-to-fac. But I know you better than he does, and it's because of that that I've done it this way. See, this topic of conversation is painful for me, it always has been, even now after a decade has passed. My emotions aren't as easy to overcome as you'd expect because the circumstances that led me to being without them were excruciating and I still don't fully understand it, or them._

_That being said, it's easier this way because then my emotions won't stop you from making a decision for yourself because I know that me being upset makes you upset and I don't want you to witness that, baby. The thing is, this is where you're vampire side comes from: your gifts, you're hair, you're curiosity. His name is Edward and I say 'is' because there's no chance he could be dead, not even in memory. He's your biological father. Before I carry on, if you come to the decision that you want to find him and meet him then don't hesitate to ask; don't spare my feelings because if that's what you want then I'll help you as much as I can. You have my blessing to look for him._

_My story with the Cullen's began happy, until my 18__th__ birthday - that's when things changed, but I'll start from the beginning because it's time you understood and knew everything. _

_I first met them in Forks High, when I first moved into Charlie's, in junior year. Everyone knew the Cullen kids but they were quite secluded. I ended up being Edward's lab partner in Biology and at first he was really off with me and I thought I'd accidently done something wrong. He avoided talking to me as much as he could until one day I was nearly hit by a van and it just so happened that Edward managed to get there in time and stop it from hitting me. He was stood nowhere near me and he tried to convince me that he was stood right next to me at the time and that I didn't remember because I'd hit my head. I wasn't stupid though, and after going to La Push and being told some legends, I figured out what they were. He didn't lie to me, of course. It turned out that he was a mind-reader and that I was the only mind he couldn't read which made him curious about me. Then to top it off, he'd never been as affected by anyone's blood before me either. He wanted to kill me, but he didn't; he saved me. The night I found out for definite what him and his family were, I was in Port Angeles and was cornered by some drunken men. He saved me._

_As soon as he shared his secret I knew that I loved him unconditionally. He expected me to be scared of him by showing me his strength and speed, even telling me about how Alice could see the future and Jasper could control emotions. But nothing could keep me away from him or him away from me. And he told me many times in return how much I meant to him. Even after the accident that gave me my scar he told me, and he stayed with me after and I honestly thought he loved me. I thought they all did: Alice, Emmett, Esme, Carlisle, even Jasper. Not so much Rosalie._

_I don't know what I did to make them leave me, I honestly don't and if I knew I'd probably understand better. In a sense I do understand; I knew I could never measure up to them but still I'd built a relationship with every single one of them. I guess the difference between our species was too great to carry on. The only one to say goodbye was him and even then his words broke me completely. He told me he didn't want me and that was the worst part, knowing that all along our entire relationship had been a lie and that hurt more than I can express with words. I understood the danger they posed, how could I not? Jasper almost attacked me once on my 18__th__ birthday because of a single drop of blood. He would have done too if it had not been for those who held him back. I was scared at the time but I knew the risk and I was willing to take that if it meant being a part of their family. But I guess the risk wasn't enough for some. I think that night played a part; I'd sent the family away because of their unwanted desire, but who knows? The only person who can give me answers is the one person I wish to avoid._

_I can't help the feeling that I was used. I was a young, naive human and the vampire whom I loved was deeply attracted to my blood. It also wasn't long after you were conceived. In fact, it was barely a few days later that they'd left, so you see why I feel used. Maybe a sense of guilt resided in one of them which forced them to remove themselves from my life. I'm not blaming the time that Edward and I shared, or my stupidity, because it gave me you, and that was a far better result than any I could have wished for. Knowing you were inside of me posed a different journey for me altogether. It took Jake a while to get used to the idea and of course, we had to introduce Charlie into the extremities of the other world and devise a plan that should keep me alive in case something went wrong, after all, you were part vampire._

_Although I hate my feelings and the immobile state that I forced everyone to witness, I'd go through it all again for you; the pain, the heart ache, the numbness, all of it. You are the best thing that happened to me, Ness._

_I pray that you understand my past and the decisions I faced. And I pray you understand why I can't bring myself to face any of them again. But if you _do_ wish to know them then I will somehow help you locate them. I promise._

_I love you. Always,_

_Your Mom x_

I'd cried and cursed and clawed at my hair; dinted the wall and destroyed my pillows; my pent up rage evident as I screamed out my emotions taken from my new-found knowledge. One look at Jenna's panicked expression had shocked me out of it. It was then my human reactions occurred and I'd collapsed to the floor in tears. Jenna had held me on the floor, much like Mom had done the first night I found out. Being held in Jenna's arms I remembered the next morning after waking up to find myself curled on my mother's chest. She was stroking my hair affectionately and kissing my forehead as I awoke. She'd told me that she had to go and that she was sorry for making me cry. Her selflessness had never annoyed me so much as it did at that precise moment. She was always blaming herself for something – turning the main focus away from other people's involvement- but it was hardly ever her fault. She'd blamed herself for making me cry but it had been the actions of others that had made me so upset; more specifically, the Cullen's actions towards her. She'd told me that she had to leave to go and arrange some things back home but that Jake would be in the forest later so that I could go hunting with him. I'd refused at first but then she scolded me for not taking care of myself, because it was blatantly obvious that I needed to feed. She'd left after kissing my head and telling me she loved me a final time.

I'd gone to Jake that night and I could see how uncomfortable he felt being so close to the campus, now knowing who else attended. As soon as I was in his arms he'd relaxed immediately. I could understand his torment; whilst my mom had lived it, Jacob had _watched_ her live it and knew the truth from the very beginning.

Reliving these memories had me drawing another dark picture. Looking at it form, I saw a girl looking at herself in the mirror watching the happy smile in her reflection's face whilst she stood looking sombre and pregnant.

A frantic hammering on the door had me break away from my drawing and looking to the intrusive sound. I walked to the door and sniffed the air, identifying the person on the other side. I'd begun doing this to avoid any surprise visits from a certain unwanted vampire. The familiar human scent told me it was my best friend standing behind the wooden rectangle. Another series of knocks resounded. I yanked open the door before she could cause more noise. It was still early in the morning, barely seven AM. She pushed me back into the room and slammed the door behind her before turning a serious, rather threatening (for a human) gaze on me. She planted her feet firmly on the floor and folded her arms across her chest.

"Renesmee Swan," She began, "I am not – repeat, _not_ – going to allow you to stay held up in this _bloody_ room anymore. You and I both know you are not sick and that the _only_ reason you don't want to leave is because you don't want to run the risk of bumping into two certain douche's, well, _tough shit_! You need to pull yourself together and be the friend that I know rather than running scared because of them. Don't you _dare_ deny that you're not, Nessie, because you _are._ I may be human but I am your friend first and foremost. I've had to suffer through watching them parade themselves and have had _Alice_ coming up to me and asking me questions regarding your whereabouts. I am doing this because I care about you and I am not collecting anymore Biology notes for you. We have a lecture this afternoon which you _can't afford_ to miss and I know that you've missed seminars, lectures and practical sessions in your other classes too. Pull yourself together woman and ignore the bastards if that's what you want, but don't hide yourself."

Her speech was complete with hands gestures and an obscene amount of pointing. She concluded by folding her arms across her chest and giving herself a short, sharp nod.

"Are you finished?"

She nodded then stuck her chin out as if expecting me to defy her, "Yes, I am."

I sighed because I knew she was right, "Okay. Let me get dressed."

Jenna's eyebrows shot up, "'Okay'? You've just accepted it like that?" She asked, snapping her fingers.

I hid my amusement, "Yeah. Jenna, you're right, I can't hide forever."

She dropped her arms and her entire body relaxed out of its stiff posture, "Well of course I am, I was just expecting you to put up more of a fight."

I shrugged then collected my toiletries and my robe to take to the bathroom.

"I'm not giving you long. You need a nice big breakfast!" I raised an eyebrow at her, "I have it on good authority that you haven't eaten anything human since last week."

"I had a tin of soup two days ago!" I protested.

Jenna snorted and plopped herself down on the end of my bed, "Soup should not be classified as food. And it's _not suitable_ either. Now, go and get dressed!"

Admittedly the shower worked wonders to my tense body. Lathering my body with soap and scrubbing the tension from my back, the steaming, pelting water was amazing. Of course, I couldn't stay any longer for the sake of Jenna's patience and my sanity – I wouldn't have put it past her to have burst into the shower cubicle and dragged me back to my dorm stark naked! Wrapping my now pristinely clean body in my robe, I slumped back to the room reluctantly accepting the fate that lay ahead.

Upon entering, I saw Jenna sprawled on the bed with her hands resting behind her head waiting 'patiently' for my return. By her feet was an outfit that had been laid out for me, underwear and all. I huffed and dressed in what she'd presented. She remained quiet as I brushed my teeth and scrapped my hair into a ponytail. I retrieved the shoes she'd chosen for me and pulled them onto my sock covered feet. I straitened up and saw Jenna now leaning against the doorframe holding my bag out to me expectantly. The bag remained unzipped, and from the slightly open pouch, I could see the stationary and resources I needed for my morning Art class.

"Get moving!" Jenna ordered, "We gotta eat."

I pouted but followed her anyway.

I bought and ate an apple, and a granola bar, under Jenna's watchful eye. I kind of felt bad for Jenna, all she was doing was looking out for me – like my mother had asked her to - and the only thing she was getting from me was indifference. She'd tried to make conversation that didn't revolve around the recent news bulletin of my life, and all I'd done was ignore her attempts. After eating, she bought up a different subject that I actually paid attention to as she walked me to my class.

"Your mom told me that Jacob's patrolling this morning. She thought it was best that he was around in case class got a bit heavy for you. He's sticking close by."

I smiled at the thought but it didn't quite show on my face.

As soon as Charlie got back to Forks, he'd rounded up Jake and the pack and filled them in on his visit to campus. Safe to say, they weren't impressed and Jake nearly exploded. They'd devised a security procedure alongside Bella and decided that they would alternate watching the grounds from afar. All I had to do was go to the woods and they'd be there with me. Knowing Jake was close by was a real fear reliever. "How come my mom tells you these things and not me?"

"Because Bella knows that I'll process what she's saying." She pointed out, "Look, Nessie, your mom is your mom and she knows you a whole lot better than I do. She can tell when you're not fine even though you say you are. She's looking out for you as best she can."

My heart plummeted; I'd not be fair to her either. "I know."

Jenna pulled me into a hug outside the classroom and whispered a simple 'good luck' in my ear.

I inhaled and walked into the room. It wasn't full yet so I took my usual seat for the seminar and got out a notebook and a pencil. Timea was in the room instead of Helen, but I knew she'd be taking over later for the practical session. She greeted me warmly and asked how I was feeling after my bout of 'illness'. I told her I was fine.

I tried not to think of a certain classmate that had yet to enter the room and avoided looking towards those who entered by doodling. Lost in the little drawings, I didn't sense anyone's presence next to me until I heard the thud of a bag hit the floor to my right.

"Hey Nessie!" it was Sarah, "Listen,. I just wanted to catch you before class to tell you about the party this weekend. Same time, same place as the last one, okay?"

I smiled and nodded. But it was then that I saw the profile of the black-haired vampire enter through the door, "Sounds great! Hey, would you sit with me today?"

Sarah smiled in return but her eyebrows furrowed, "Sure, but doesn't Alice usually sit here?"

I took a small glance at said girl and saw her looking directly at me across the room her head tilted the smallest fraction in confusion, "Usually, but she can sit somewhere else today."

My smile as Sarah took the seat was genuine - she had no idea how much she had just saved me. The astonished look on Alice's face as she took the seat Sarah normally occupied was just as genuine.

Timea strolled over to the door and slammed it closed signalling the beginning of class, effectively quietening the room.

She began with some small talk and some notices before recapping on the lecture I'd apparently missed in my absence of Andy Warhol. Throughout the class, I felt Alice's continuous gaze and ignored it. The few times that I caught her eye, however, I didn't return the timid smile she wore. Eventually she must have realised my change in demeanour and attitude as she stopped smiling altogether. Her face was a blank mask to others. However, Jenna and I had been the ones to spend the most time with Alice and I could pick up on the hints of confusion and upset. On anyone else the expression would have had me concerned - but not her.

Toward the end of the class, Timea announced a paired project, "Andy Warhol is our chosen artist. In pairs, you will create your own canvas range of pop-art using his style and techniques as your inspiration. Helen's expecting you all now for a practical session which you will use to brainstorm you ideas with your partner. All aspects of this project will be graded and presented. The good news is: you can choose your own partners." She concluded at that.

I turned to Sarah immediately, but she fortunately beat me to the punch, "Will you be with me, please?"

"Of course I will!"

My eyes drifted up and I saw Alice looking directly at me. She was closer to us now as if she'd been approaching. Her eyes flicked between Sarah and I before hurt clouded her features and she turned out of the room. For a split second, I felt bad. But it lasted for that – a second. "Hey Sarah, I'm sorry to bunk out on you but can you tell Helen that I'm not feeling too well? I guess I've not recovered fully yet."

"Oh, are you okay?" She asked concerned, "Of course I will. Just find me when you're feeling better and we can brainstorm in our spare time to catch up, okay?"

As soon as I confirmed that, I got out of there. Storming into the cool outdoors I relaxed. Alice wasn't supposed to upset me like that. Of course she upset me, but that was under different circumstances; I felt guilt - which I shouldn't. I needed Jake and I needed to hunt; two birds with one stone and all that?

I made my way to the forestry hastily, only to be stopped in my tracks by the person approaching me...the one person who I wanted to suffer more than Alice and the rest of their coven put together.

Strolling toward me with a fierce expression on his face was Edward Cullen.

"What was that about Alice?" He growled.

I stopped dead. Shit, hide thoughts, "Excuse me?"

He was right in my face now and I tried extremely hard to keep my emotions out of my mind. Seeing them on my face was completely different to finding out why they were there in the first place and I owed it to Mom to keep quiet about that.

"Would you care to explain to me how my sister went from being perfectly fine this morning to now being incredibly upset?" He seethed. Each syllable was pronounced just so, that it was incredibly terrifying.

I stood my ground. "I have no idea what you're talking about."

"Oh really?" He scoffed, "Because the one coherent thing I can manage to get out of her is your name."

His face was close and his hot-headed temper was worsening. Sadly, so was mine, and I needed to get out of there before my vampire instinct kicked in and I did something I'd regret.

Mustering as much venom into my voice as physically possible, I leaned in a spat, "You don't scare me, Cullen! You and I both know that it would be better for you, if you and Alice stayed away from me." I began to walk away but I couldn't resist adding, "After all, you wouldn't want people finding out what you are, would you?"

I ran as soon as I rounded the corner. I couldn't go into the forest as I'd run the risk of Cullen finding Jake. He'd have to wait for me.

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	17. Chapter 17

**I have to thank bcrepn for help with Nessie's endeavour this chapter. After the last party it seems she needs to be a little more daring...**

**I call creative licence for this chapter as I'd imagine it would seem a little unrealistic. :D**

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><p><strong>:Twilight character names belong to Stephenie Meyer. All characterisations, plot lines, descriptions and additional details belong to the respective author. No copying or reproduction of this work is permitted without personally written authorisation. ©2011 Jezzyem, [0408/12]. All rights reserved worldwide.**

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><p>After my encounter with Edward, I chastised myself for letting slip the idea that I know he's a vampire. It was stupid and reckless and now I had a whole heap of worry regarding the unknown resting on my shoulders. I locked myself in my dorm afraid that if I stepped one foot out the door then he'd be waiting for me.<p>

I'd eventually gone to Jake that afternoon.

To say he was anxious, would be an understatement - he was frantic. I didn't realise that he'd been waiting for me for four hours and he was on the verge of phoning Forks to see if they could get a hold of me. He wrapped me in his arms and kissed my head telling me not to do that to him again. He was shirtless as he'd been parading as a wolf for most of the day. As he held me I splayed my hands on his back forgetting the skin on skin contact. He stiffened as he saw my minor confrontation with Edward flash through his mind. I didn't even realise until I felt the vibrations of a growl rumble in his chest. I looked up at him and saw his jaw set in a ridged clench and his eyes had turned a feverish black.

"Jake?" I whispered.

His eyes never fell to mine, he kept them ingrained on something in the distance over my head, "What did he do?" He spoke through gritted teeth and I immediately felt the quivering of his body.

"You already saw. Nothing else, I promise, he didn't hurt me." I told him, "Besides, that's not what I'm worried about."

He looked in my eyes then, his anger depleting slightly, "What's worrying you?"

"I dropped us in it! I told him that I knew what he was; how is that keeping us a secret? He's not stupid he'll put two and two together and figure it out." Now, I was the frantic one.

"Nessie, so what if he knows? He won't automatically assume that you're Bella's daughter and he thinks you're human, doesn't he? Don't try and argue with me." He said sternly when I tried to protest, "You're too human for him to think you're a vampire and he couldn't know that hybrid's exist. You need to calm down and not worry. If you worry then it'll give him a reason to suspect something-"

"But he already does suspect something!" I exclaimed.

Jake sighed, "The only thing he could possibly suspect is that you're a human who knows vampires exist. If that's the case, then wouldn't he want to lay low so that he doesn't risk exposing himself?"

"It's impossible to avoid him when he takes the same class."

"So drop the class." He said as if it was the most obvious option possible, "And call your mom. She'll want to know."

After he'd told me that, I'd called her and recounted my confrontation with Edward. It was the one time she'd not been sure what to do. I told her about my worries of seeing them everywhere and her first suggestion was that I should return to Forks and apply for different colleges next year instead. I admit, it did cross my mind as a last resort but I couldn't just pick up and run. This was my life and I was finally doing what I wanted. I'd made friends and I was gaining an experience. It was bad luck that threw my 'family' into the mix along with everything else, but I would not let that deter me from my original path. Jake's suggestion seemed the most plausible.

So, in my cowardly state, I spoke to the people I needed to speak to in order to drop the History and Philosophy of Science course so that I could avoid him. I didn't dare risk the opportunity for him to be in my presence again. Using the excuse that three courses caused a far too stressful workload and that I'd prefer to concentrate on my other courses, they'd complied with my request.

I found comfort in the fact that my degree could still be Joint Honours. I wasn't going to give up my art for the sake of avoiding Alice. Alice I could handle – she didn't intimidate me the way that Edward did – and I didn't hate her as much.

Hate:- to dislike intensely or passionately; feel extreme aversion for or extreme hostility toward. A strong word, especially from me seeing as I'd never hated anyone before. But how could I not? The way they made me feel, the way they hurt my mom, they way they seemed okay with it all. That flared hate and if I was being completely honest, I wanted to hate them. It was easier, and after seeing my true family's pain, who wouldn't?

The holidays couldn't come at a better time.

-o0o-

It was finally Saturday and only hours away from the party to end the semester. With this party came a sense of elation. It meant that after this weekend we were free to return to our families and bask in the laziness that came from being home and having your parents care for you again. For me in particular, it was so I could see my family and forget about everything that had made itself know. The time away from Seattle and the campus would give me the ability to pretend that nothing had changed. In reality, I knew that I couldn't just pretend.

Mom and I had yet to speak in great detail about the situation and I knew that we needed to in order to move on. My hate sprung from what I knew but there was so much more behind the scenes that I had yet to learn. Mom tells me so many times that I'm a curious girl and I know that that's the truth; I want to know more – about what happened and about them – I do...but part of me doesn't want to know either.

I'd spoken to Bella again yesterday and the Cullen's never came up. Instead, I listened to her concerns regarding my health because I told her that I would inevitably be drinking tonight. As I recall, I was okay the next morning, but I also remember how quickly I fell into a drunken abyss. Bella recalled that too. After reassuring her, we ended the call and I was happy that we'd had a conversation like we used to , before the Cullen issue fell onto our laps. Through that conversation we didn't have them playing on the back of our minds, waiting for one another to broach the subject.

Jenna interrupted my musings that afternoon by walking in like she'd chugged a gallon of energy drink. Her body and her mouth contradicted each other vastly. Her saying 'all I can think about tonight is just relaxing with friends and having a few drinks' when her bouncing exterior screamed that she was going to let loose and cause some trouble. I couldn't wait to witness that. She'd gone all out tonight in mid-thigh, kingfisher-blue chiffon skirt secured over a white vest with thin black belt. Black peep toes were on her feet, blue feather earrings hung from her ears and silver bangles jingled on her wrists. Her blonde locks were piled on her head with a few strands leaking from various places.

I also wanted to modify my image tonight; change my normal casual clothing for something dressier. With Jenna's supervision, I dressed in a pair of black leather leggings with a strapless black top and the only pair of heels I owned. Jenna took care of my hair and face. She added eye-liner , mascara crimson red lipstick and ruffled my curly hair so that it fell over my shoulders. The only jewellery I wore was the necklace I'd received for my birthday from Bella.

I was _pulling the vampire look,_ as Jenna said; black with red lips – sexy but dangerous. We really contrasted each other tonight but we both wanted to have fun.

The familiar _boom, boom_ of the bass resounded from the walls as we approached. Remembering last time, Jenna held out a small bottle of vodka as we eyed the guys taking payment before entry. They offered us a friendly smile as they recognised us and keep their eyes on our faces rather than our bodies obviously remembering Alice's threat from the last party.

Alice. _Would she be here tonight? _I hoped not.

Jenna and I were immediately greeted by an already inebriated Whitey who dragged us to dance to some new unidentifiable club song that soon morphed into _Call me maybe,_ a song that – surprisingly - more guys were singing than girls. Sarah intruded with drink for the both of us which we were ordered to drink in one. We happily complied.

I was prepared to drink slower tonight so the effects lasted longer. That was my theory anyway. The confidence hit early the last time and figured the blackout occurred because I drank too much too quick. If I could slow up my drinks then hopefully the effects would last longer before it got too much.

I wanted to get off of the makeshift dance floor, so I hit the couches with Whitey and we shared a few shots and conversation with the people that joined us. Zara was eyeing up whitey again and simultaneously glaring at me as his arm draped over my shoulders. As more drink flowed, conversation and outrageous singing grew louder and more frantic. Whitey's arm slipped lower down my arm forcing me to lean into his body. Jenna joined us with Sarah soon after and the conversation shifted to what we were doing for the holidays. Most people were leaving at the beginning of next week like I was, so that they had tomorrow to recover before they faced their parents.

"Ahhhh!" Jenna screamed at me making me jump, "Nessie let's dance, I love this song!"

I laughed but let her pull me from my position, "Another of your favourites?" It didn't go un noticed that Whitey's hand dragged down my body as I stood, but I ignored it all the same. He was drunk.

As Jenna and I danced to the beat of Chris Brown, we finished our drinks. Jenna was too into her air-grinding movements to notice that her cup was empty so I took it upon myself to retrieve more drinks for us. I weaved my way through the different bodies of my class mates toward the back of the room where a table full of different drinks were stocked with everyone's 'payments'. I wasn't the only one at the table as I mixed a considerable amount of vodka with some fruit juice.

Just as I was replacing the bottle, I was pushed with purpose from behind. My stance never faltered despite the strength behind the shove, but my instincts piqued and I turned slowly to look at my 'attacker'. Zara stood looking at me like a gaping fish, not entirely sure of what was going on as I looked at her. She obviously felt the force of her push yet the fact that I didn't move a millimetre had her rethinking her approach. I could see the cogs working in her mind as I looked at her questioningly. I tilted my head to the side as my eyes narrowed into slits. I held the table that was now resting at my back for support and watched her hands rung uncomfortably in front of her. Fear flashed in her eyes as she regarded me.

"Do you have a problem?" I hissed.

Her eyes flickered before she plucked up the courage to face me. She stood marginally taller and lifted her chin as she stepped forward, "As a matter of fact, I do."

I chuckled, "Would you care to enlighten me?"

"I think it's pretty obvious that I like Whitey so keep your hands to yourself, slut! I've seen that way you are with him, draping yourself all over him as you laugh and your outfit doesn't exactly make you go un noticed does it!" Her voice grew louder and more slurred; her face drawing closer to mine with each word.

"Firstly, nobody calls me a slut. Secondly, if you got off your high horse for one second you would see that I am not interested in him that way, _so back off_!" I yelled back adding a shove to her shoulder to get her out of my face.

The alcohol was taking affect and I didn't want to explode. Apparently, I wasn't fully aware of how hard I was pushing as she tumbled back a few steps into someone behind her. She muttered an apology to them before she reared forward at me. I went to crouch into defence when someone stepped in front of me and Zara was halted.

I couldn't comprehend who it was until they were pulling me away towards the exit. The familiar height, hair and scent was all I needed. I just wished I had sensed them so I could avoid them. I came here to let loose and forget about them and their family but instead they're here. That's my bad luck.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?" I screamed at them.

"Getting you out of here before you cause something you'll regret." They countered.

"I don't want _or need _your help!" I pulled my arm from their grasp and stood my ground, "Alice, let go of me! Apparently it's gone unnoticed that I've been purposely ignoring you for the past few weeks." I added sarcastically. "Why are you here?"

"Look, Nessie-"

"Renesmee," I spat. My hands were shaking at my sides. This was not good.

She sighed wistfully. Her eyes dropped in defeat, "Look, I know I've done something to upset you but last time you were here it was my brother that carried you back."

She probably didn't mean me to feel patronised and chastised but that was how she made me feel and I fumed in response, "And I didn't ask for your help then either! I told you're brother and now I'm telling you: Keep away from me! If see you any time in the future it'll be a thousand years too soon!"

He face dropped at that comment and I turned and weaved my way back to the middle of the room. How dare she? I couldn't believe she took it upon herself to interfere like that. Was I not capable of taking care of it myself?

I felt a hand on my shoulder and I turned and growled. I shut up immediately when I saw it was Jenna, "Are you okay, Ness?"

The difference between Jenna and Alice was that Jenna understood and she wasn't the one that hurt my family. My demeanour fell and a flood of tears erupted. I fell into her arms as she soothed me. I was grateful for the amount of drink that had been passed around the drunken humans causing their ignorance. No one paid attention to my collapse and I was extremely glad.

"I saw Alice, what'd she say?" Jenna asked calmly.

I lifted myself from her and shouted "FUCKING CULLENS!" That type of language wasn't me at all and I very rarely used it but I couldn't think of anything else to release my anger at that point. My hands pulled at my hair frantically as I tried to rein in my unnecessary anger.

Jenna stayed quiet as my emotions subdued, "Why do they feel the need to interfere?" I asked hoarsely. My voice cracked, "It's like they have this seventh sense that's saying 'Renesmee Swan should be part of your coven; she's family'. Why me, Jenna?"

She just held me again. She was unstable on her feet and she swayed side to side. The motion caused the evident buzz in my system to grow steadily. Jenna pulled back suddenly and looked over my shoulder. Scared that the Cullen's had heard I turned my head, but no one was there. I looked back at Jenna with a frown on my face.

"Hey I have an idea!" She announced, "What would you say if I told you I have an idea to annoy daddy dearest?"

Mischief gleamed in her eyes and it made me giddy, "I would say, 'want do you have in mind?'"

"Just so you can't back out, I dare you to take Edward Cullen's beloved car for a drive." She announced gleefully. I understood why she'd changed tactics and made it into a dare. She wanted me to steal his car and under normal circumstances I would have refused.

She began tugging my arm relentlessly until I moved with her towards the exit not waiting a second in case I flat out refused.

"I don't even know what car he owns." I told her.

"Luckily for you, I do. And I also have someone that'll help us." She admitted smugly as we descended the stairs.

Something occurred to me and I halted behind her, watching as she walked- well stumbled- to the bottom of the stairs, "You've had his planned haven't you?"

She turned slowly and looked at me with an innocent smile. She didn't say a word as I joined her at the bottom of the stairs.

"Not exactly but I did hope that there would be a chance that we could do something like this."

I followed her out into the open air and allowed my eyes to adjust to the change in light. The air offered a small breeze that lapped at my hair and dimmed the impending fuzz caused by the alcohol.

"Here, drink this." Jenna ordered, handing me a small plastic bottle. I drank the small amount of liquid and scowled.

"God, what it that?" I exclaimed as the burn trickled down my throat.

"Sambuca and tequila. If I had some Tabasco sauce, we could have flat lined." I had no idea what she was talking about. "It'll give you more courage and if it helps, this whole thing wasn't my idea."

"Then whose idea was it?" I asked, stunned. How long had she been planning this?

"It was mine." A voice came from behind me. I never heard their approach which startled me and their lack of human scent had me turn at them defensively.

Justin Hart was casually strolling towards us with his hands raised above his head at my crouch, "You didn't think I'd miss out on all the fun did you, sis?" He addressed Jenna before turning to me, "Looking good, Nessie. How's your head?" He was teasing.

"What are you doing here?" I asked.

"It was my idea wasn't it? I'm not leaving all the fun and games to you two." He announced. "Come on, I know where his car is."

He began walking in the direction of the parking lot that sat furthest away from the school buildings, "Hey Justin!" I called as he walked away, "How do you know what car he has? And why are you doing this?"

He stopped suddenly and chanced a nervous glance at Jenna before he turned to me, "I've been helping out with the patrols," He admitted. "Given that I'm a hybrid I can get the closest to the campus without raising any suspicion. I've seen Cullen get in and out of his car a lot, that's how I know."

I turned to Jenna, "Did you know about this?"

Jenna nodded her head, "Sort of, I knew he'd done it once but not often."

"So are we doing this or what?" Justin changed the subject bringing us back; a smile gracing his face.

He walked away without waiting for our reply expecting us to follow. Jenna did. I was outnumbered.

We walked deeper into the parking lot where there was less light. In the corner sat a silver Volvo, surrounded by empty bays. The lack of light obscured it from view slightly but it was easy to make out with my eyes. The metallic vehicle gleamed and only faint scratches made from loose asphalt affected the cars 'perfection'. All three of us stood there staring at it, waiting for the other.

After a couple minutes silence, Jenna got impatient and tried the door handle before flinging her arms in the air, defeated, "Now what do we do, the doors locked!"

Her voice was getting slurred. And if my vision was any indication, we didn't have very long. Jenna walked around the front to the bonnet and kicked at the car, twice. A screech of metal protested as it was ripped loose by her foot. Her eyes widened as did mine.

Justin and I made our way to the front to inspect the damage she'd caused. The front number plate of Edward Cullen's car was hanging off on one side, resting on the floor whilst one screw remained in place on the nose. Justin bent down and ripped the rest out effortlessly then threw it on the floor close by. We glanced around to make sure no vampires had noticed. Humans we could handle.

A thought occurred to me then, "Justin, do you know whose patrolling now?"

His brows furrowed, "Err, Paul I think, why?"

_Perfect_. "Could you go get him for me, please and tell him what we're doing?"

"Woh, you're not expecting him to stop us are you?" He accused.

I huffed dramatically, "Both of you seem to have forgotten that one vampire can see the future. If a wolf's scent can outweigh a human's, then couldn't it have an effect on vampire powers too?"

"I don't know. Does it seem different when you use your power on them?" He asked.

I hadn't thought of that. It would be easy for Edward to know who had done it but if Justin was involved I wanted to protect him too, and Jenna. "Yeah, I suppose you're right. Still Paul's scent will mask ours anyway, Paul hates vampires the most – he can just about tolerate my mom, and I don't even think the Cullen's know about werewolves so..."

Justin nodded, "A valid point. I'll go get him."

As Justin ran off, I circled the car. Simply taking it for a spin would not be enough-not for me.

"Hey Jenna do you have that red lipstick with you?" I called to her.

"Yeah sure." She replied. I eyed the back window of his car. I could see my reflection in it; my mouth in an evil smirk, my eyes big and full of fire. A black tube appeared in front of me. I uncapped it and mumbled and thanks to Jenna. I set to work careful not to snap the stick-it was a nice colour.

I took a step back and Jenna laughed.

_Drink my blood, you sucker_

"Renesmee Swan, if Jacob could see you now he'd have a fit." Paul's voice echoed across the lot. I had no idea whether he was referring to what I was wearing or what I was doing; I had no idea whether that was a good thing or a bad thing.

I painted an innocent smile on my face and turned to the most temperamental wolf I knew, "Hey Paul, do you know how to hotwire a car?"

He scoffed like I'd insulted him "Of course I do!"

I stepped around to the driver's door and pulled it open. The lock made a satisfying crack as the small metal bolt inside gave way. Cullen should have alarmed the car. "Could you set to work then, please?"

Paul shook his head but stepped forward anyway. He sat in the driver's seat and his hands went missing underneath the steering wheel. My head began to fuzz and the familiar burn started in my body. As quick as that came, the rumble of the Volvo's engine came to life.

"Move over," I demanded shoving Paul's shoulder so he'd scoot to the passenger seat, "I'm driving."

Jenna and Justin moved into the back seat as I slid into the driver's seat. Throwing the car into reverse, I edged out of the parking bay before putting it in drive and tearing out of the school grounds. I didn't know where we were going but the windows of the car we down and whoops of delight came from my three passengers as I sped forward. I recall Paul saying that he wasn't taking the blame for this. The city blurred past us but at it did, so did my vision. As quick as it happened last time the searing heat of venom lapping at my system took over and my head slumped back with the pain.

That must have been the first signs that I was out of it as Paul's frantic voice tried to communicate with me. I hit an orange roadwork cone in the road and I lost control. The car swerved left and before the crash came, the fire in my chest shot to my head and I blacked out.

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><p><strong>See the aftermath next chapter! Sorry for my absence, I know its summer but I have been so busy.<strong>

**I have a twitter specifically for my readers so follow Jezzyem where you can find details of updates, sneak peeks, Q&A's and info of future stories I'm planning. My next story will be starting around Christmas and it involves my readers ****a lot****! You'll see why.**

**REVIEWs are as good as Nessie's fiercness this chapter :)**

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**Jezzy x**


	18. Chapter 18

**:Twilight character names belong to Stephenie Meyer. All characterisations, plot lines, descriptions and additional details belong to the respective author. No copying or reproduction of this work is permitted without personally written authorisation. ©2011 Jezzyem, [01/10/12]. All rights reserved worldwide.**

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><p><span>EPOV<span>

I was livid, my tendons vibrating with anger. Two reasons:

First, the early hours of the morning saw Alice upset over that same human. I couldn't understand my sisters need to converse with humans, especially after what happened the last time. I chastised myself for ever thinking that. My chest constricted in pain as I let her face flash into my mind. Ten years.

I walked out on Alice to go hunting, tackling more than what I needed but I needed to release my anger. Anger at my sister, anger at myself. Especially myself.

Second, my car had been vandalised. I hadn't needed my car until later that afternoon when I'd planned a drive around the city. Strolling to where my car was parked, i noticed the damage immediately and It was then that my anger fully took over. The windshield was smashed, my licence plate was missing and there were dents in the front bumper and bonnet.

It wasn't the destruction that bothered me, what annoyed me the most was the fact that my car had been the one targeted. The dents looked like inverted fists which proved human involvement.

What made matters worse? The lack of a human scent. If there was any then it was clouded by the vivid stench infesting the interior. A stench that I hadn't smelt in over sixty years.

I called Carlisle to tell him the damage and he rationalised for me, calming me down. I was to report it to the university like any human would and he was going to send a tow truck to pick it up and take it to the garage.

Walking to the main office building had me passing the music block. A path that held the fresh scent of that human girl that Alice was entranced with. My anger still burning inside, I felt the need for confrontation despite better judgement.

I followed the scent leading further into the building where music was being played. A piano. Both led to the auditorium.

She didn't hear me enter. She remained sat on the bench playing a melody that I couldn't recognise. I was mildly content listening to sound until the song morphed into another. One that was more recognisable. I waited a while, waiting to see if the first bar were purely coincidental or whether it was the same song that I composed 10 years ago. One I hadn't played myself in ten years.

Except, it wasn't me playing, it was Nessie. My eyes, thoughts, mind and body erupted in pure rage. So I ran.

-o0o-

R/NPOV

Sound came to me before vision or any other form of coherence appeared. It was fuzzy though, like hearing the sound coming out of someone's headphone across the room; all you can make out is muffled vibrations and it's difficult to work out the song. It was highly irritating. Add a blindfold to the mix and you would feel a slight sense of what I was currently feeling.

The sound most likely came from my mind rather than from an outside source. The symbols that echoed and pounded against my skull became more prominent as more of my senses awoke; as they awoke, so did the pain. Like before, my head pounded only this time it was more ferocious and I could tell it wouldn't disappear as quickly as last time.

I tried to relax myself so that the pounding would ease, only to realise that I was in my dorm bed; the scent of my room lingered and overpowered. I hadn't remembered coming home at all last night. As my mind eased I _did_ remember - The drinking, the argument, the prank the..._oh my god, the crash._

I jolted upright in a panic, my heart quadrupling in speed in a matter of a millisecond. I was stopped by the jar in neck; my heads paralysis halting me. I thought of the missing time I couldn't account for; combined with the pain, I let out a worried sob.

Immediately my head was rested and I slumped even though my head remained stable and balanced. My body was numb yet I still remained supported. Another sob escaped me. I couldn't focus on what was happening to my body or my mind. I tried but with un coordination, it was difficult. Topped with the knowledge – of lack of – regarding the aftermath of my careless endeavour, I was at a complete loss of control.

My cries echoed in my eardrums yet it seemed a separate sound. That was, until I heard a voice, "Shh, calm down."

I let out a harsh breath one that shook my entire body. "Baby, you need to calm down. Breathe, Ness, just breathe, you're okay."

The voice was familiar but my mind refused to place it. It wasn't _my_ wellbeing I was concerned for. My best friend – my _human _best friend – had been in the car when it crashed, along with her brother and they'd both been at risk.

"Woh!" The voice shouted, "Listen to me! Breathe, damn it. You're fine, Jenna's fine, everyone is okay. Now please baby, come back to me."

_Jenna's fine. She's fine. Oh my god, she's okay_.

I did as I was told. I attempted to control my state of mind and focus on the simplest survival reflex. Inhale, exhale, inhale, exhale.

As my mind calmed the feelings in my body returned. My muscles felt limp and weak, my head pounded relentlessly and my head was elevated by something else...Something cold.

A cold hand brushed through my hair before being rested gently on my forehead. It was nice and eased the pounding somewhat. I could hear a soft feminine whisper close to me, reassuring either me or herself "You're okay, you're okay."

I opened my heavy lids and waited for the fog to disburse from around my pupil. I turned my head and looked at who was with me. Red lips, heart-shaped face, sparkling gold eyes and soft brown hair that hung long. _Mom_. I stared in wonder before acknowledging the look of age in her eyes.

In humans, when someone had experienced anxiety, their eyes would bag and would look ever-so-slightly bruised. Their facial colouring would lessen vaguely and small premature wrinkles barely a half-centimetre long would tighten again a strained smile. With vampires it was impossible to tell with these facial differences. The only indication was the dullness presented in their eyes and the frown that graced their face. It was what I was looking at now on Bella's face. It was a look that shattered my beating heart.

"Mom," I croaked, "I am so, so sorry. I didn't mean to-" I was rambling any form of apology I could. The whole ordeal was entirely my fault and it hurt to think that people who weren't directly involved were affected by my actions.

She cut my off with a hush, "I know you didn't mean to and you're extremely lucky that no one was hurt very much."

"Very much? So someone was hurt? Oh my god," My voice was hoarse and a fresh round of tears and sobs erupted. I screwed my eyes closed and my head lolled towards Bella. Her movements were rapid. I was wrapped in her arms as she lay with me on my small bed in a nanosecond. She stroked my hair and kissed my forehead as my crying ebbed.

"You were hurt the most, baby, From what we can tell, you have a minor concussion and you had a few cuts and bruises which have healed by now. You split your head open but the bleeding's stopped so you're okay." She explained in a quiet voice, "Obviously, we've had to check you as if you were human."

"What about Jenna? And Justin?"

"They're fine, honestly. Justin saw what was going to happen as soon as you lost consciousness and he covered Jenna. Apart from a large headache, they're okay, they were in the back." Bella explained.

Bella scoffed in disbelief before holding me tighter against her body, "Renesmee, what on earth possessed you to take his car for a joyride? You're lucky Paul hit the brake or it could have been both of you going through the windshield-"

"Paul went through the windshield?!"

"Nessie!" She exclaimed, "Baby, do you have any idea how I would feel if I lost you? You're heart beats, you bleed, you're not invincible and we don't know the extent of what could happen to you." She paused as she it sank in just how far this could have escalated, "Why?"

I sniffled; the tears falling silently as I contemplated my reasoning, "Everywhere I go I see them. And every time I see them I think of what they put you through. I hate them for it Mom I can't help it."

Her arms tightened around me as her head fell to rest on my crown, "Baby, I asked you to make your own decisions. I didn't want you to factor me into this. They're your family and you don't know the whole story-"

"But I know enough, Mom." I interrupted, "Even without your letter, I hated them before, I just didn't know who to hate." I sat up and turned in her embrace to look at her, disregarding the continuous throbbing in my head, "When something or someone reminded you of them, or something was said about them - even the smallest detail – you crumbled for a split second and I noticed. You can pretend that it doesn't affect you anymore but I've noticed, Mom, and it's the worst kind of pain for me; seeing you hurt hurts me and knowing they did that," I shook my head in disbelief just thinking about the past; times when I'd witnessed her face fall; the light disappear from her eyes for a fraction of a second before she regained control, "I can't help but hate them. The only difference is that I now know who to hate."

I wiped my eyes before I continued to tell her of last night's events. I told her about my argument with Edward earlier in the week, then I told her about the confrontation with Zara and Alice. I continued to tell her how Jenna had planted Justin's idea into my head, "It wasn't their fault; it was mine. I wanted revenge; to take back the feeling of power and control that Edward seems to emanate. I wanted justice and if stealing his precious car and infecting it with wolf scent then I was game. We all were because we all felt a sense of dislike against them. I didn't mean to- I didn't mean for anyone to get hurt. I just wanted to, to...I don't know!"

My head fell against her chest as she held me. I could feel her chest shake at times and hear the larger intake of breath as she cried. "I'm sorry, Mom, I'm so sorry."

I had no idea how long we laid like this. Time had no meaning but it seemed to halt as we both let our emotions take hold. I cried and shook in her arms for putting my friends in so much danger and for putting my mom in this position. She stroked my hair and left lingering kisses as she cried at my safety and the pain I felt.

"Where's everyone now?" I whispered. She heard me anyway.

"Dawn came for Jenna and Justin and after learning that Justin was the self-proclaimed 'master mind' behind it. She took Jenna to get checked by a doctor and to give them a 'swift tongue-lashing'." She chuckled. I smiled but internally cringed knowing that Justin kind of planned it all for _my_ benefit. It was my fault. "It seems light compared to what Jake did to Paul."

I stiffened at the prospect of the over protective Jake I knew, "Wasn't going through the windshield punishment enough?" I dared ask.

Bella chuckled again, "Not according to Jacob. They battled it out and things appear even but I imagine he's still mad at him."

I'd have to apologise to Paul next time I saw him.

One thought weighed heavily on my mind and I couldn't stop myself from asking, "Mom," I hesitated, "What happened to the car?"

Bella shifted slightly before she told me. It didn't escape my notice that her voice dropped quieter, "Only the front end was damaged. Jake and Paul pulled the metal back into a more suitable shape although, I haven't actually seen it. As far as I know they moved it back to its original space too."

I silently prayed that I wouldn't get found out. As I thought about the possible consequences I could face, I shifted my head to rest against Bella's chest. As I did I caught a glimpse of a foreign object resting on my drawers. "Mom, why is that here?"

I could actually sense her rolling her eyes "It seems that Jenna thought it would be amusing to leave you a little reminder of last night's antics."

My mouth opened with an inaudible 'oh' before I laughed at my friend's attempt at humour. The object was a metal rectangle propped up as if it were a decoration; the licence plate to Edward Cullen's car.

-o0o-

I re awoke feeling much better, if not slightly _too_ well rested. The dorm room was darkened as the afternoon wore on; the _pitter patter_ of raindrops I could hear outside told me that the rest of the day was forecast as dull.

I stretched and yawned simultaneously as I looked around me for any signs that Bella had returned. She'd left just as I was falling to sleep with the promise that she'd be back later after talking to both Jacob and Paul. I feared for Paul's life at this point.

Nothing told me that she had returned; she'd left the room just the way it was, licence and all. A mouth watering smell filled my senses, distracting me from what I was originally planning to do. Sat on my desk was a grilled chicken sandwich, sat on a plastic plate. On the chair to my desk lay a pair of jeans and a simple long sleeved, thin, navy sweater/shirt.

I'd never eaten so quickly before but it was obvious I need the nutrition. With that in mind, I made a mental note to go hunting when Bella returned. After my appetite was sated, I brushed my teeth and hair (not with the same brush) and got dressed. I needed to get some fresh air back into my lungs and I knew exactly where I was headed.

It had been a while since I'd done anything other than school work in my spare time. It was either that or hanging out with Jenna that filled my time these days. What I really craved right now was to endure one of my much loved pastimes. I wanted to sketch more than anything, but the weather made it impossible without ruining any paper.

The only thing left for me to do was visit the auditorium. I had yet to take Giselle up on her offer and it had been a while since I indulged. In fact, I had only played once since Giselle offered and even then I had been too nervous to think about using the grand piano in there. But after my daring side emerged last night, I was more than ready to test the keys and strings that made the beautiful music that I wanted to hear.

Walking outside it was cooler that I expected. Mixed in with the light wind was an icy bite, reminding me that we were a month away from Christmas and winters peek. If I were human, the light sweater I wore would not have been enough to provide warmth. For me, it was enough. The ice nipped my cheeks and it made the air feel fresher, the sole reason I'd venture outside to begin with.

I kept my pace steady as I walked towards the music block, eyeing the few stray students that remained on campus that had yet to return home for the festivities. The reminder of the holidays had me smiling with excited anticipation. Not only would I be returning to my safe haven but we had the Hart's joining us this year and I couldn't wait.

I felt the change in temperature as soon as I stepped through the doorway. Lights were still on in almost every room in the block but I didn't sense anyone around. I continued down the corridor and the few stairs that lead to the auditorium from the back. It was smaller than I expected, seating less than one hundred people but that was fine by me. The high ceilings offered great acoustics for any music without the use of an amp. The back entrance took me directly through the draping curtains and onto the stage.

At the centre was a large black piano that sat solo in a spotlight. I couldn't help thinking that it was kind of cliché for the only object that was lit was the one thing I was here for. I approached it with caution, or – more appropriately – adoration. I'd never had the chance to play a grand before, usually sticking to my small model that resided in my bedroom at home.

My hand traced the keys without pressing down before my hand fell to the soft leather of the bench. I sat and lightly touched the keys; much like I had with Giselle's the first time. Even the random uncoordinated keys sounded perfect and crisp as they echoed from the walls. I was right about acoustics.

I began to play Beethoven's 'Für Elise' – one of the first professional compositions I'd learnt how to play before happily morphing into one of the few compositions I wrote myself.

It was light tune that always reminded me of my mom. I'd sat on my piano bench at home with the opening eight bars not knowing what I could do next. I'd hit a complete blank before Bella came and sat down next to me asking to hear it. I'd shown her the ten seconds I had and she'd beamed telling me I was doing an amazing job. We talked for a while about family and after she'd left I remained smiling. As I smiled for my mom, the notes came effortlessly and I was able to rewrite then down and remember it as her song.

I hadn't been the only person to write a song using her for inspiration though. It was one of my favourite things to play and I was unsure how to feel about it now that the composer had a face and a name.

Conflicted, I began to play the lullaby; my hands moving freely as if on their own without my input. The melody never ceased to comfort me and my heart swelled at the thought of my mom and not the person who wrote it. This was truly her lullaby. I closed my eyes and left my hands move. I'd played it that many times that I didn't need to watch the keys to make sure they were right.

Getting lost in the music was a mistake. My senses were concentrating on the melody too much, so when they were alerted to another presence in the room, it was too late.

I stood up and span around in time to see the blur before a strong vice was clutching my throat, strangling the oxygen from my lungs. My feet were lifted from the floor as my lower back was pressed painfully into the wooden contours of the piano I'd just been playing. My own hands reached up and tried to scratch away the hand that was wrapped around my throat.

My vision blurred but I could make out whose face was inches from mine; eyes black and blazing. Fear overwhelmed me as he snarled, "Who are you? What do you know about her?"

I was looking at a pure vampire, not one that was controlling himself protecting the charade. Edward had let go completely as his rage consumed him. My head felt light and dizziness became dominant from lack of oxygen. He shook me and screamed at me again but my senses were too lost to understand. His grip eased the smallest fraction. A sliver of air made it down my windpipe but it was enough to stop me from passing out.

"Get your hands _off of her_!"

The grip vanished and I fell back to the ground, bracing my knees for support as I hungrily heaved in the desired air.

I recognised that voice.

I straightened up and looked into my mother's familiar eyes; Compassion and worry covering her features. Her cold hands rested on my cheeks and I felt safe.

I tried a minor glance over her shoulder and saw Edward on the floor, staring at Bella's back with pure shock written across his face. I was aware of her asking me something but I couldn't focus on what she was saying. Instead, I warily watched Edward from the corner of my eye, cringing when he finally spoke

"Bella?

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><p><strong>I apologise for my absence, once again, but hey, absence makes heart grow fonder right?<strong>

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	19. Chapter 19

**:Twilight character names belong to Stephenie Meyer. All characterisations, plot lines, descriptions and additional details belong to the respective author. No copying or reproduction of this work is permitted without personally written authorisation. ©2011 Jezzyem, [08/11/12]. All rights reserved worldwide.**

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><p><span>BPOV<span>

I listened from outside the building, my sharp senses able to hear the music, even from this distance. I knew it was her for I recognised the composition she'd wrote a few years ago. It was one of the few she'd completed and I loved every single one that she'd created. She was so talented and my heart soared as I listened to her play. I was in two minds about her talent though; I was glad that she'd picked up a talent for it and enjoyed it to the degree that it gave her an outlet, but knowing it was a trait that she'd inherited from her father hurt a little. Then again, because Renesmee played, I could associate the instrument with her instead.

Her melody changed into one that I'd heard before; one I'd heard before she was born. My lullaby. I stepped inside the building following the sound of her melody and smiled.

My smile faltered though. Two things happened at once and it took a second before my mind comprehended exactly what was happening. The first was that as I entered the building, the music ceased. That didn't concern me, but the fact that I could smell two supernatural scents that led in the same direction had me worried. It was obvious that the second scent belonged to one of the seven people I didn't want near my daughter, not after the events of last night and not after the state she had been in these past few weeks. When it was abundantly clear that he had followed her, I ran.

I heard shouting, the clear anger in his voice startling me into action. Neither of them reacted when I burst into the room. The sight that met me fuelled my anger to a point of almost no return and the back of my mind was grateful that some unsuspecting pupil wasn't also in the room, because they'd be dead. Edward had his hand clutching Renesmee's throat levitating her above the ground and pressing her body painfully into the piano she'd just been playing. His eyes blazed black as he stared into her face; his jaw locked into a growl. I was more of an animal in those minutes than I'd ever allowed myself to embrace, like a lioness protecting her young from an invading pride.

"Tell me!" He growled into her face, shaking her roughly causing her body to ricochet the piano, jangling a few of the springs creating a barely audible note. Her breath was shallow and I knew she couldn't breathe.

I ran forward and shoved him off, my strength still superior from my newborn state, "Get your hands off of her!"

Although it had been ten years, after the training that the Amazonian's had given me, I was a strong fighter. Much stronger than him. He flew across the room unable to catch himself in a state of shock and landed on the floor with a thud leaving a clear indention in the wooden flooring.

I turned and saw Renesmee kneeling over her body, clutching her throat and gasping for air guzzling as much as her lungs would allow. I put my anger on hold as I waited for her to gain back the margin of strength that would allow her to walk out of that room and not look back. As she straightened, I double checked that my shield covered her, an automatic response for whenever she was close enough. I cupped her face in my hands, discreetly looking over the handprints forming around her throat. Her brown eyes looked into mine and the relief I saw reminded me of what she meant to me. Like I could ever forget anyway.

"Bella?" Came that voice that in the past had melted my heart. Now it churned my stomach after what he'd done.

I cringed away, ignoring his voice, turning instead to my daughter, "Are you okay?"

She nodded before looking over my shoulder again, the fear evident in her eyes. Nessie stumbled back against the piano and I turned in time to hit his hand away from connecting with my body.

"Don't you dare try to touch me!" I snarled, forcing him to step back. He stared at my face, searching for something that I didn't know. The only thing he would be able to see was my utter fury at him. I chanced a glance in his eyes and saw...hope? I wasn't sure, and I didn't care.

I felt a hand on my shoulder and I turned back to Renesmee, worry in her eyes that overpowered the fear that still resided there.

"How – How are you here? Who –"

I chuckled sarcastically, "Who changed me, right? Wouldn't you like to know? You never cared before, Edward, so why now?"

I didn't turn toward him, simply directing the words over my shoulder instead. I couldn't look at him for two reasons: first, because I was focused on Renesmee and keeping her protected, second, I was battling the feelings that were awakening in my dead heart.

"Bella..." He chocked, his voice straining as he utter my name. I could feel his presence behind me, I could smell that scent, the one that had lingered in my mind for years, only it was a more potent smell.

Nessie was still shaking, her eyes now cast down to the ground as she watched her feet, avoiding eye contact with the person that was behind me. She could barely stand and had she been fully human, I wouldn't have been surprised if she'd wet herself out of fear. Feral vampires are ferocious and although, I'd never let that side of my nature corrupt me, she'd watched me hunt and knew the change that occurred when we let our inner beast out.

He must have really frightened her.

Ignoring him once more, I lifted Ness' chin and whispered to her, "We need to get you out of here, come on."

Her eyes were swimming, the salt water threatening to leak. I lightly brushed some fallen hair behind her ear and gave her a reassuring smile, but she could see right through me and knew that I was on the verge of exploding. No one messed with my baby. Not even if that person helped create her.

I pulled her closer to me and guided her in the direction of the door, hoping she'd take initiative and walk out before me without looking back.

Renesmee wrapped her arms around her body and on shaky legs took a step toward the door. I stepped in line behind her, my arm hovering over her lower back as she walked.

She'd barely taken two steps when Edward blurred in front of her, standing centimetres away forcing our halt by placing his hands on her shoulders. Renesmee screamed at his proximity and cowered back into my body, her own shivering in fright at his touch. I pulled her behind me and stepped in front to protect her, a deep growl emitting from the back of my throat at the pure _nerve_ of him.

"I told you to get your hands _off of her_." With venom lacing my voice, my face said it all. But he controlled himself, keeping his face fixed in the emotionless expression he was so good at.

His voice was monotonous but the depth of his dark eyes told me different "I just want to talk to you."

I scoffed, "I have nothing to say to you, now get out of my way before I do something I'll regret."

They were a poor choice of words on my behalf, because the small tilt of his mouth told me that he found them amusing. Truth was, in my current emotional state I _wouldn't _regret it, but only because I knew he wouldn't die. Of course I couldn't kill him, no matter how much he hurt me, I couldn't. And maybe he knew that, deep down.

The sniffing and the quick shallow breaths that I could hear from behind me snapped me out of my thoughts. I needed to get her out of here. She was frightened, she needed to calm down and she needed _me_ to keep her safe. I we were here in this room for much longer then Edward would begin to think in the back of that idiotic, logical mind of his, figuring out that I had some form of relationship with a 'human'. It wasn't safe for him to find out like this, not with Renesmee obviously afraid of him, anyway.

My anger, her hurt and his shock was not a good trio to be in the same room as each other so I needed to get the hell out of there, not only for my daughter but for myself too.

So I threw him way, literally. Using all the strength I had I reached up and shoved him aside at the same time I pushed Renesmee to the door. She walked forward and opened the door as I stood and watched Edward, making sure he didn't stop us again. Movement stopped and I looked to see the Renesmee silently willing me to follow her. Her eyes were rimmed red, tears and snot ran down her face which she swiped away with her sleeve.

Casting a final glance at Edward, I walked forward at human speed trying to get the adrenaline to subdue. Of course, it wasn't actually adrenaline, but the equivalent sensation.

No sooner though, I was stopped again. His hand curled around my forearm preventing me from walking anywhere. He spun me round and I found myself looking up into his eyes, the scent of his sweet breath hitting my face at full force.

"I'm not letting you go, not again." He whispered hoarsely, passionately, his eyes darting left and right as he analysed the look in my eyes.

I was losing control over my feelings. Never before had I felt such an intense feeling in my chest; not since I was human anyway. I took a breath to collect myself, "If you remember correctly, I never had a choice; I didn't go, you did." I watched his face as he relived the same moment I was, "It's my choice now, and you're letting me go."

I ripped my arm from his grasp and ran to the door pushing Renesmee into the hall and slamming the door behind me. I pretended not to hear him call my name.

Renesmee and I both ran through the building until we got outdoors where we kept a fast pace, suitable enough for humans. I didn't speak as I held her hand. The only noise that came from either of us was her occasional sniffles.

"Mom?" She whispered, he voice husky due to the aftermath of her tears.

"Shh," I silenced her "Not yet." She nodded in understanding as we strode to the dormitories, the only place I could think to take her that was the closest.

I was on high alert as I took in my surroundings, my eyes darting around everything visible. My instincts told me something wasn't right. Renesmee trailed silently holding onto my hand as if her life depended on it.

Just as we rounded the corner to head straight, I recognised the person walking towards me. She looked exactly the same with her small frame, petite features and the same spiky, black hair. Knowing that walking into her was inevitable, I pulled Nessie into my body and wrapped my arm around her shoulders. She turned her face into my shoulder and let me guide her.

"Oh my...Bella," Alice's voice trickled toward us in a soprano pitch as we approached her. I growled lazily not wanting to deal with _another _Cullen, "Goodness, it really is you, I knew you'd suit being a vampire, I saw it, but did he believe me? No. I knew you were here I was coming to find you, I finally saw a glimpse of you! I've already phoned Esme, her and Carlisle are on their way with everyone else; they're so excited to see you."

I glared at her. I didn't want to see her let alone the rest of them. As we drew closer, she finally caught my gaze and shut up, her mouth gaping as she took in who I was with, "Nessie, Jesus, what happened?"

"Ask your brother." I hissed at her and made the move to walk past.

"Oh no," She muttered to herself, "What happened?"

I ignored her and just kept walking with Renesmee crying into my shoulder. I kissed the crown of her head reassuringly, holding her tighter to my body. I stiffened as I heard the footsteps traipsing after us.

"Wait, you actually know each other? I mean, I thought there was a resemblance but how is that possible. Bella, she's a human!" Alice yelled.

That did me. I turned on her, the girl that used to be my best friend and let my anger erupt, letting every minute piece of anger I felt at her family come forth, "Of course she's a human, do you think I'm dumb enough to not realise that little detail?! I'm sure I'm not the _only_ vampire that's welcomed a human into their home. If I remember correctly _you_ did!" I spat not caring how her face fell, "At least, I'm not _pretending_ to care about her. At least, I haven't – and won't - abandon her, letting her fall prey to some other vampire that comes along. Huh, I wonder how that feels!" I added sarcastically.

I knew it was a low blow but I didn't care. Yes, I was abandoned but I didn't become the prey of another vampire. They didn't need to know that, obviously. I'd like to think that they felt a little bit of remorse for what they did to me. I mean, she was making it sound like I was going to turn on Renesmee, my own daughter, and leave her the way they left me. I wasn't heartless nor was I like them. It just wasn't something that was plausible. Not in my mind anyway.

I kept walking even as the following footsteps ceased. I wasn't running away, nothing of the sort. I was simply walking away from their attempts at talking to me. Here was me thinking that our species were more intelligent than humans; were they not smart enough to comprehend the idea that I _hated_ them for what they did? And what they _were _doing to my daughter?

I'd never been more thankful for seeing a door before as we approached the building that would take us to some form of comfort. No one was around to witness Ness' distraught – another thing I was thankful for. We reached her room and she unlocked the door leading us both inside. As I closed the door, Ness let out a loud sob as she collapsed headfirst onto her bed using her pillow to muffle her cries. My heart broke for her.

Suppressing my own feelings I walked towards the bed and laid down with her, curling my arm around her body, shushing her for comfort. She rolled around and buried her head into my chest as she heaved for breath. The smell of her tears lingered with her natural scent. There was nothing I could say, not yet, so I simply stroked her back, her hair and kissed her head; signals that I was here, that I loved her and that I wasn't leaving...ever.

After a while, she tried to speak, "I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I sho- I should never have asked to co-come here," She said between sobs, "I was selfish and stubborn and now they, they know. They know and I'm so-sorry, mommy, I'm sorry."

"Oh baby," I sighed, pulling away slightly so she could look at me. She needed to see the truth in my eyes, "None of this is your fault, none of it! I was the reason he found out I was still alive, not you."

"But if I'd never came here then-"

"No," I cut her off, "You needed to come here. It was just luck that had fate put them here too. Don't blame yourself, please." I kissed her again as she wiped away the remains of her tears. She snuggled into me like she did when she was a baby and closed her eyes. I automatically hummed to her and twirled one of her curls between my fingers as I listened to her heart slow and her breathing become even.

-o0o-

I admired the loose photo of her and Jenna that was propped against a framed photo, masking the image that showed Ness and Jake on first beach after her first attempt at surfing three years ago. She'd managed to pick up the technique, but with the vicious waves, a slight lack of balance had thrown her into the grey ocean. When she came to the surface, her and Jake emerged from the water laughing and I had captured the photo at the right moment.

I toyed with the corner of the photo that showed her and Jenna's smiling faces as I listened to the muffled movement down the phone. Charlie was moving into the kitchen after Jake had ran out abruptly. I'd just told both Jacob and Charlie about what had happened a few hours ago and of course, Jake had said he'd be here as soon as he could. I wondered how much more hate Jake could summon for the Cullen's now that this episode had taken place.

Charlie was fuming silently, letting the information sink in as I waited for his response patiently.

When he spoke, his gruff voice was quiet against the scrapping of the chair at the kitchen table, "How's she doing?"

I sighed, "She's sleeping. It's affected her."

I looked over at the image of my sleeping daughter who had used her cover as a protective cocoon that wrapped around her entire body; even in a dream state she was protecting herself.

I didn't miss Charlie's muttered insult about the Cullens and I chuckled slightly. Charlie could never use expletives, not even when it came to his worst enemies, nor criminals. "What are you going to do, now?" He asked.

I sighed heavily and rubbed my forehead, "I don't know, Dad," I'd asked myself this for the past hour, at least, contemplating what would be for the best. "Getting her out of here would appease _me_, but is it best for _her_? She still has Monday's classes before the holiday's begin."

Charlie paused at the end of the line. I could imagine him stroking his moustache the scratching the stumble on his chin.

I watched Renesmee sleep, her face a picture of tranquillity.

Charlie's voice broke the silence, "Screw the classes, Bells. If Alice is in her class, how's she going to cope anyway? And if the Cullen's are all heading there, then screw the school and get her home."

In all my years, I'd never heard Charlie suggest ditching education of any form.

I smiled at my dad, "When Jake arrives we'll pack up and head home. All of us." I decided.

"Good girl. Call me when you're on your way back."

"I will do." I smiled.

"And, Bells?" He paused, "Just bring her home safe. We can protect her here." he concluded before her hung up the phone.

I laughed as I hung up the phone. Just the fact that he added 'we' into that sentence told me that we were so _un_like the Cullens. Species didn't matter when it came to us, we were all family and despite what we were, we stuck together. Charlie, despite knowing he was the weakest, intended to be on the front line like the rest of us, playing an active role in everything, if Jake and I were there then so was he. He'd be there no matter what occurred; the patriarch of the Swan family. The man we all loved dearly.

"Mom, who was that?" Renesmee asked from her bed. Her voice was thick with sleep and her eyes were drooped as if she would fall back to sleep any moment. I hadn't realised she'd awoke.

"It was Grandpa, sweetie." I told her as I sat down beside her, brushing her hair out of her face, "I told them what happened. Jake's on his way and as soon as he's here, we're going back to Forks."

"And never coming back?" She asked.

I knitted my eyebrows together. There was no disagreement in her voice as she mentioned it almost as if she'd prefer the idea of not returning. "Is that what you want?"

She just shrugged and looked down, playing with the corner of her quilt, "I'm not sure."

I looked at her face that was a mask of worry and confusion, contemplating what would be the best for her, "How about this, we go home, then in January when you're due to return, we'll talk and see what you want to do, okay?"

She nodded and lent in to hug me. I held her close to me, secretly glad that she wasn't sure whether she wanted to stay home with us.

Our embrace was broken by the buzzing of my cell phone. 'Jacob' flashed on the screen. I opened up the text message and read it aloud, "I'm outside, let's go."

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><p><strong>My Twitter followers knew the reason I have been absent for so long as do the reviwers I replied too. This story has a lot to offer yet and will continue. I only mention this because someone asked if I had ended the story the last chapter...No, there's at least ten chapters yet (estimated) if everything goes to plan!<strong>

**If you want to be kept updated more often then follow me on Twitter: Jezzyem This is purely used for Fanfiction purposes.**

**REVIEWs are like Bella's feistiness this chapter...you go girl!**

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**Jezzy x**


	20. Chapter 20

**This Chapter has now been edited. If you have read it then you don't have to read it again...unless you want to.**

**Quick note: I used to constantly worry that my chapters were boring and stopped the bug events happening, but considering a lot is going to be happening soon, I've stopped worrying and am going with the flow.**

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><p><strong>:Twilight character names belong to Stephenie Meyer. All characterisations, plot lines, descriptions and additional details belong to the respective author. No copying or reproduction of this work is permitted without personally written authorisation. ©2011 Jezzyem, [2612/12]. All rights reserved worldwide.**

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><p>I stood staring out at the familiar empty road lined with white houses of all shapes and designs. Frost lingered in the air creating a glittering, icy blanket over the faded grey tar and grassland. Carbon dioxide turned into mist as it left my lungs and floated upward. The unease was back now that we'd returned home; back to Charlie's...and not for the first time. It had been two weeks since Bella, Jake and I left Seattle to return here assuming that we were leaving all the drama behind. It seemed I was the only one who thought too positively when it came to thinking we'd gotten away. I was wrong.<p>

_Heading toward Forks in the back seat of a rental, my heart was vaguely calmer than it had been a few hours before when I caught – or thought I caught – a final glimpse of Edward as we drove out of the campus parking lot. Pulling into our street I perked up at the prospect of being home for at least a month and leaving everything behind. But turning in meant more to Bella and Jake than it did to me because they sensed in first. Within a second they had both stiffened and mumbled an expletive._

"_Do you want me to turn around?" Jake murmured aggressively._

_She wasn't wearing her seatbelt so she was sat in an awkward position; turned on the chair facing Jake ready to pounce in the back seat if she needed to, "No, we can't! Charlie's still at home."_

_Confused, I couldn't help but feel uneasy. Something wasn't right, even I could feel that now, but Bella had always been in control of her emotions - aside from these past few weeks - but now fear was evident in her whole physique and that worried me, "Mom, what's going on?"_

_She turned and gave me a small smile of reassurance, "We'll handle it; don't worry." She turned to face the road briefly, eyeing our surroundings as we parked in front of our driveway before turning back to me, "Promise me you'll stay in the car unless I ask otherwise?"_

_Despite being confused I promised I'd remain in the car. It was only when she got out of the car that I realised why. Carlisle and Esme, who I recognised from parent's weekend, stood up from their spot on the porch and watched my mother and Jake approach the house. From my position in the car I could still make out the interaction, what was being said and the way Jake's hands were shaking by his side; fists clenching as he tried to control himself. I felt completely helpless from where I was but what could I honestly do to help? I'd only get in the way._

_After Bella asked them why they were there and Jake rudely told them to leave, Charlie came out the house and my panic immediately rose. It always amazed me how Charlie accepted things and how he'd managed to figure most things out for himself after his whole need-to-know basis. I smiled besides all the concern as I saw him brandishing his beloved shotgun like a walking stick as if it could intimidate vampires. As Bella was becoming increasingly angrier at the audacity of the elder Cullens, Charlie caught my eye and smiled. I saw his moustache move and the Cullen's broke their conversation to look over at me. I slouched lower in my seat not willing to look them in the eye. I guessed Charlie had mumbled something, momentarily forgetting that vampires had impeccable hearing. I took a chance and looked up in time to see Bella storm inside the house only to return seconds later with a black leather duffel bag slung over her arm. As she left the house and made her way down the porch steps, Charlie slammed the front door and Jake followed Bella back to the car, each of them returning to their respective seats. _

_Jake accelerated without second thought about anyone else that may be on the road and headed right onto the winding roads to La Push._

"_What happened?" I asked pensively._

"_The Cullens happened, that's what!" Jake snapped. The echo of his loud voice jolted me; I didn't expect it to be that loud. Sure, I'd heard him shout before but never at me. Never._

_Bella hit his arm with a resounding smack then turned her head to look at me. Jake took a second to look in his rear view mirror and smile apologetically before Mom spoke, "They're back in Forks wanting to see us. I'm not ready to speak to them and neither are you," She spoke truthfully her eyes boring into mine, "Charlie doesn't want to see them, and Jacob here has always hated their guts."_

"_Damn right." I heard him mutter as he pretended to concentrate on the road ahead. _

_I glanced out the window and saw the horizon lining the ocean as we drove down the hill towards the edge of La Push civilisation, "I still don't understand. Why have we come here?"_

_Jake explained this one, "Look, you know about the treaty we had with the Cullens; it's still in effect and given that Carlisle is a 'peace-maker' of sorts, he won't risk us starting the war just to come and speak to your Mom. So, you're gonna stay in La Push with us until further notice."_

_That was understandable and the most plausible action, however, a thought came to mind that raised concern, "But what about Christmas? Mom...Jenna and her family are supposed to be coming over."_

_Bella faced forward and pursed her lips before turning to Jake, "How'd you feel about houseguests this year?"_

_I could tell by her voice that she was partly joking. She knew as well as I did that the chance of actually convincing Jake into letting a vampire into his home was very near to impossible, "Come on Bells, the pack and I can just about tolerate you, let alone another one of your friends."_

_Bella scoffed and slapped his arm again, softer this time._

"_Seriously though, Sam would never go for it." He emphasised by shaking his head, "I know this Dawn character isn't into humans and that she has two kids but they won't let her into our territory."_

"_So does that mean they can't come to us now?" I asked, disappointment lacing my voice._

_Bella turned to me then, "No, baby, they can still come. We'll just have to be back in Forks by then."_

"_Will it be safe?"_

_Jake chuckled un- humorously, "I'll stay with you, don't worry."_

"_Look, we'll go back Christmas Eve morning. Besides Charlie's staying there and I guarantee he'll get another visit." Bella added. I worried about Charlie and his pride. His attitude meant that he was extremely stubborn and it showed in everything. As much as he'd like to think he could, he couldn't win against the Cullens. I just hoped that what Jake said about Carlisle rang true when it came to Charlie._

"_What about the Christmas Eve bonfire? We always go!" I asked Jake._

_Jake looked back at me again, "You can still come to that, Nessie! So can Jenna and her brother if he wants. It just means your Mom will have to stay with Dawn. Charlie's still coming."_

_The rest of the car journey was silent until Jake slowed and pulled onto the dirt road that acted as the driveway outside his faded red house._

_I got out the car and met Jake at the trunk to retrieve my bags. Grabbing my belongings in his right hand and slamming the trunk closed with his left, he told Bella, "I'll return the rental tomorrow. You guys just settle in."_

_He then looked down at me as Bella let herself in the house calling for Billy. Jake's brows furrowed as he looked at my thoughtful expression. He raised his free hand and cupped my cheek, stroking it tenderly with the pad of his thumb, "It'll be fine, Ness, you'll see. Come on." He grabbed my hand and led me inside. He was right, Christmas Eve was weeks away yet so I shouldn't be worrying_

But the weeks passed quickly and here I was stood on the driveway in the sub-zero weather scanning the street for any Cullen who felt the need to grace us with their presence. So far nothing, but I wasn't one to let my guard down now. It wasn't the only reason I was stood here though, Bella had asked me to wait for the arrival of our guests and the prospect of spending Christmas with them made me giddy. Of course, that was overthrown by the constant on-edge feeling I was experiencing as my eyes flicked across the landscape. Constant anxiety wasn't something I wanted to experience, not after I'd spent the last ten days relaxing in La Push, not worrying about the events that transpired before we left.

My musings were cut short as I heard the distinct rumble of an engine turn into our street. My heart speed as I heard the tell tale spluttering of gas spew through the exhaust upon approach. I remained stationary as I waited for the image of it to appear over the slight rise in the road. And when it did, a lump formed in my throat. Taking a step back I prepared to run as I watched the black Mercedes draw closer and closer. All the windows including the front screen were blacked out, obscuring my vision and forcing me to strain my eyes to make out the identity of its driver.

I took a few more steps backward just as the passenger's window rolled open and the torso and blonde head of Miss Hart popped out the window to sit on the door screaming, "Honey, guess who's home for the winter?" whilst waving her right arm high above her head.

I burst out laughing, half from amusement, half from relief. I didn't miss the chastisement that Dawn gave her daughter from the front seat as they pulled up alongside our front yard.

I heard the front door open simultaneously with Jenna's passenger door as she climbed out and jumped on me wrapping her whole body around mine in a hug. I caught her as she screamed in my ear, not being too surprised by her approach. I sighed at the fact that she was okay, having not seen her since the accident two weeks ago. Finally, as Jenna jumped down, I saw Bella embrace Dawn in a more standard greeting than that of my best friend.

"My god, I've missed you, Ness!" She beamed, "How are you feeling, I haven't seen you since-"

"I'm okay, I'm okay, well, physically at least. I'll fill you in later." I told her as I saw Justin approach with their bags.

"Loch Ness, looking as good as ever," He teased before coming forward to hug me too.

"It's good to see you too, Justin, how've you been?"

He didn't get the chance to reply as Jake came forward and wrapped his arm over my shoulders possessively, "You must be the kids, Jenna and Justin, right?"

I couldn't see, but I could _feel_ him eyeing up Justin by the way Justin stood taller and more rigid, scrunching his nose to his obvious distaste at Jake's attitude. I knew more than anyone that Jake only threw in the 'kid' accolade for Justin's sake. I reached up with my right hand and held onto the one that fell over my shoulder; giving it a small squeeze in both warning and reassurance.

Justin smirked and reached his hand out, "And you must be Jacob. I've heard a lot about you, from these pair _and_ Paul."

I couldn't help laughing. Justin knew what Jake was doing and threw it back at him. Jacob had been angrier at Paul's involvement in that 'prank' than my own and Justin had him pegged. Jake had nothing to worry about with regards to me, he knew that, I was his imprint; I didn't really have a choice. Not that I'd choose differently anyway. Justin joined my laughing as he looked at Jake. I chanced a look at Jake and saw his jaw stay rigid, but as he looked down at me I saw amusement dance in his eyes. I gave him a quick hug before I ordered him, "Help him with their bags."

Locking my arm through Jenna's, I led her up the porch and into the house telling her about our usual family traditions of going to the bonfire on Christmas eve to listen to Billy give a speech on the importance of family as we roasted marshmallows on the fire, then returning home and ordering pizza and watching films until we flaked on the couch , then on Christmas we'd swap gifts and then tuck into a traditional Christmas dinner before we sat in the living room and just talked waiting for the day to draw to a close. It had been the same every year; Boxing Day, Bella, Jake and I would go hunting before we took a trip into Seattle or Olympia to look through the sales and see the Christmas spirit fizzle out. It had been last Christmas in Seattle that I decided I wanted to attend U-Dub in the fall.

We were lost in our own little world in the kitchen, just catching up and reminding ourselves of the easy friendship we shared. She filled me in on what happened since I last saw her; they visited Shane in North Dakota before they ventured down here – the Shane that I was going to meet tomorrow night. I told her about our resent 'vacation' in La Push and about how Esme and Carlisle had been waiting for us.

By the time we'd spoke about, well, everything, Jake shouted us, "Girls, we gotta go! If we're late again, Billy'll roast my balls on the fire!"

_Thwack_

"Jesus, Bells!"

Jenna and I erupted in laughter as we made our way toward into the hall to grab our coats. From the hallway you could see into the living room. Jake and Justin were stood side by side next to the couch where Bella and Dawn were sat as Charlie was still reclined in his beloved armchair.

I watched as Jake still rubbed his bicep glaring down at Bella who was wearing a stern look on her face fighting a smile.

"Well we wouldn't want to hurt your assets, would we now?" I asked innocently, batting my eyelashes playfully as I shrugged on my coat and boots.

Jake turned his glare on me before striding past me and out the door, muttering under his breath once he was out of earshot. I chuckled as I walked over to Bella, a grin now spread across her face, giving both her and Dawn a kiss on the cheek before I followed Jake outside.

Justin had already claimed shotgun so Jenna and I climbed in the back. A soon as the door closed behind us, Jake accelerated harshly causing Jenna to catch her breath.

"Jacob!" I yelled, "Did you forget that we were recently in a car accident?" It was a rhetorical question. One that had him glance in the rear view mirror at Jenna's pale face before slowing down to a more suitable speed, apologising to us as he did.

Jenna clutched her chest as her breathing evened out and her heart rate returned to normal. I vaguely saw Justin deliver a swift blow to Jake's other arm as he registered his sister's fright. Turning to me, Jenna smiled briefly before shutting her eyes and resting her head back on her head rest. I felt terrible.

"I'm so sorry." I told her.

She smiled and turned to me, opening her eyes, "It's okay, it just caught me off guard. Don't worry, I'll be fine."

I nodded still feeling guilty.

"Hey," she said softly to grab my attention, "That accident wasn't your fault. We're all to blame."

Fifteen minutes later we pulled into the parking lot near First Beach and climbed out, the cool wind whipping around us as it flew in from off-shore. We walked collectively down the beach, watching as the small burning orange light in the distance slowly grew into a mixture of colours; parts burning blue and green from the driftwood that made up some of the fire wood. In the distance the black silhouettes of the locals either lounging around the bonfire, running around, or stood, became more prominent. I easily recognised Sue and Emily walking around dishing out treats to the thirty people already around the bonfire and saw Quil and Embry play fighting close to the water's edge.

"Hey guys!" A voice called from way off. I looked toward the voice and focused on the figure running towards us.

_Seth._

Both Jenna and Justin had met Seth before having been running patrol around the campus. Both of the Hart's relaxed considerably now that they recognised someone else and walked quicker toward Seth and the bonfire.

I went to match paces with them when Jake took a hold of my hand and held me back. I stopped and looked at him seeing the concern on his face. The light from the fire danced across his face shadowing some of his features and lighting his dark brown eyes, and, for the first time ever, I think, I considered him beautiful.

"What's wrong?" I asked.

He lightly stroked the back of my hand as he replied, "I just want to say sorry about the car. I completely forgot about it. Please say you aren't mad at me."

_Oh, the stupid, stupid man_, "Of course I'm not mad at you. It just caught us off guard, that's all. Now come on, we've got a bonfire to enjoy."

I pecked his cheek before I shoved his shoulders lightly at took off running towards the bonfire. I heard his laugh behind me before I heard his quick steps. It wasn't long before he'd caught me round the waist, spinning me round in the air as I laughed. In that moment, I forgot about the worries that had been plaguing me for days concentrating on me and him, what we had now, and what my entire family and friends meant to me regardless.

-o0o-

"I couldn't believe it, he actual managed to burn _all_ his marshmallows!" Jenna cried through her laughing fit. Her laughing alone is what caused all of us at the table to laugh alongside her, not the story itself. Charlie, Bella, Dawn, Jake, Billy and I were all sat listening as Jenna embarrassed her brother with tales of last night's bonfire. A cacophony of laughs filling the kitchen as we all sat around the table enjoying Christmas. Justin on the other hand was yelling protests trying to protect himself from the onslaught caused by his sister.

"Justin, you're a vampire, shouldn't you be able to smell when the marshmallow begins to burn _before_ it turns to coal? And after doing it once, shouldn't you have realised before you burnt all ten?" She retorted with a wicked grin on her face.

"Half! Half vampire!" He defended before grabbing his sister in a headlock and rubbing his fist over her hair.

"Uncle, uncle!"

3 o'clock Christmas day and we had just finished eating our dinner on the elongated table in the kitchen that consisted of Billy's table and a camp table connecting to our kitchen's, covered in a vast red tablecloth. I'd woken up this morning to smiling faces and gifts under the tree in the living room: new novels from Charlie, new clothes from the Hart's, my usual Christmas hamper from the pack (meaning Sue and Emily), a new charm from Jacob and new sketchbooks and music books from my mom. Surprisingly, I also found a key to a less conspicuous car out on the driveway; the re-modelled version of the beat up car that was purchased in the summer. One gift I hadn't been inspecting was a glittering fairy charm from the Amazonians. When I questioned Bella about the gift, she reminded me that I used to ask Zafrina to make me be in fairytales; stories about magical fairies were always my favourite choice, hence the charm.

"Right I'm dismissing you all, I volunteered to help Bella with clean up duty, so bugger off!" Dawn joked as she stood up from the table. I found it ironic that the two people who didn't eat were the ones that had cooked and were cleaning. But they were happy to do it, and I certainly didn't want to so I left them to it without protest.

Making our way into the living room, I collapsed on the couch in between Jake and Jenna fingering the new homemade charm that Jake had given me, admiring his handy work.

He saw me looking and touched my wrist stroking it softly with the pad of his thumb, "You know the meaning behind this one right?"

I smiled looking him straight in the eye, my heart thumping against my ribcage as I thought about the charm's significance "I have a good guess. Thank you."

He told me as soon as he'd given me the black wooden ring that he'd carved it from _Diospyros crassiflora_, or as he rephrased, _Gaboon Ebony_; a wood that happened to be naturally black. It was easy for me to work out the meaning; the wood was black, his name, and it was carved into a perfect ring that fit my third finger perfectly. This was his promise that one day I would be wearing a ring that made me a Black. The knowledge that he was thinking about marriage told me that he was beginning to see me differently. I mean, I know we'd kissed and that we flirted more than we talked recently, but with everything that was going on, I hadn't really imagined my feelings changing for him this quickly, and this soon.

I was lost in my own mind, letting the chatter around the room become background noise as I thought about the unknown and my future, wondering how my life would change even though my appearance and growth would freeze at some point.

Completely unfazed by the conversation around me, I jumped out of my skin when I heard a smash come from the kitchen.

I jumped into action, running toward the noise only to halt in the doorway completely shocked. Glass lay shattered around Bella's feet, her hands outstretched as if she were still holding the glass bowl that had held the potatoes not half an hour ago. I looked at her horrified face, her features frozen in surprise as she just stared at Dawn, whose own face resembled my mothers, both of them ignoring the growing audience.

It didn't register in my mind that Bella's natural reflexes should have caught the glass before it hit the ground until a second later. Whatever it was that had shocked Bella that much, had utterly gotten to her like never before.

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><p><strong>REVIEW and FOLLOW: Jezzyem Reading <strong>_**them**_** make me feel as mushy as when I read back Jake and Nessie's fluffy times!**

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**Jezzy x**


	21. Chapter 21

**WARNING: References to sexual assault are made in this chapter. If you are sensitive to this subject matter then please don't read. This is during Dawn's long speech between the points, "He was flirty and kind and the most handsome man I'd ever seen." to "It got better." If you don't want to chance it then skip to the very end of the chapter and PM for a brief overview void of any description.**

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><p><strong>:Twilight character names belong to Stephenie Meyer. All characterisations, plot lines, descriptions and additional details belong to the respective author. No copying or reproduction of this work is permitted without personally written authorisation. ©2011 Jezzyem, [1201/13]. All rights reserved worldwide.**

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><p><span>BPOV<span>

Sometimes I hated how my mind could have different thoughts intertwine and be running wild in my head all at once. It was times like now when I was watching Jenna interact with her brother and laugh at them, taking in everyone's smiling faces around one table that I wished it could be that moment that dominated my mind. As much as I wanted it to, it wouldn't work. Everything that had transpired over the last few weeks was running around in my head. I was making plans like I was planning a war, preparing for the worst scenario in which they just wouldn't leave us be. Despite being away for ten days, the break hadn't helped clear my mind. Nor did the conversation I shared with Dawn last night telling her all my worries and aspects of my past that I could actually talk about as if she were my guidance counsellor. Believe it or not, Dawn and I had never discussed our past lives until I bought it up last night, normally focusing on the present and our children. There were some bits that she'd told me; I knew all about how she came across her gifts, how grateful she was that Shane found her, and how naive she was when she thinks back to the night she discovered vampires. She didn't divulge into that story though, she didn't trust me enough at the time.

Dawn's chair scrapped away from the table as she rose to her feet, bringing me back to the present and silencing everybody with her words, "Right I'm dismissing you all, I volunteered to help Bella with clean up duty, so bugger off!"

I smirked as I noticed that it was Renesmee and Jenna that left the table first, shying away from offering to help. I shook my head amused. My daughter had a head on her shoulders, that's for sure, but she still liked being taken care of, despite her need for independence. I scoffed lightly, _look how well that turned out_.

Dawn frowned and looked at me. I shrugged her off like it was nothing but I knew she wouldn't drop it. Last night whilst the kids were in La Push I filled her in on what the past few weeks had sprung, informing her on every bit of my past without much reserve. I trusted her though, aside from Jake, I never had anyone to confide in about my past. Renesmee doesn't count. I could never talk to her about the Cullen's because I didn't want to paint a skewed picture in her mind; instead leaving a blank canvas-which apparently looks similar to mine anyway.

"You're worried." She pointed out as she piled the dirty dishes on the counter at human pace.

I moved to put the condiments back in their respective spaces, "How could I not be? The family that abandoned me ten years ago have returned and expect me to fall back into their arms. Their appearance- look at what it's done, to me, Ness... God, look what it's done to her: the anxiety, the crying, and the accident." I paused, my mind whirling uncontrollably, "What should I do?"

I leaned against the table calming my mind. Dawn came up next to me leaning against the table to look at my face, "Hey, it's Christmas. Don't dwell on it today...as for Nessie, let her make her own mind up. But sooner or later they're going to find out who she really is. Wouldn't it be better coming from you?"

I sighed running my fingers through my hair, "Your right, let's not talk about this today, it's not necessary."

We cleared away the rest of the table before we began washing the mounds of dishes, placing all the food that could be consumed tomorrow in containers to be frozen. Reasonable conversation flowed as she took the job of washing the dishes whilst I dried and put them away. It was then that, surprisingly, Dawn opened up about her past.

"He was everything I wanted - well, thought I wanted – until Jenna ..." She broke off from her abrupt confession, "You know, you're not the only person to have what you thought was love ripped away, you know?"

My rhythm halted. I looked over and saw her holding her breath; her eyes screwed shut.

"What do you mean?" I prompted cautiously.

She huffed, "I mean it in every sense of the word." She began, "You know that Dawn used to be my middle name, don't you?"

I nodded, Renesmee having already shared this detail with me. Dawn's eyes kept me quiet. I could see her replaying her memories in her mind; her face betraying her completely.

"I changed it when I left England." She told me. "I loved Jenna's dad, Richard, more than anything in the world. We'd been together since I joined sixth form and I eventually followed him to Leeds for university. He was a year older. After my first year at Leeds Met, I fell pregnant and had to drop out. He wasn't around a lot so I moved to a village nearby so I could still be close to him." She was silent for a while, reengaging herself in her thoughts. She laughed bitterly before she carried on, "He was hardly ever around. He blamed lectures and assignments that he had to complete and he frequently missed her scans and appointments he _knew_ I had. He even questioned the paternity once. He was there for her birth, and it was the first time I'd ever seen him cry. It was then I thought things would get better. He moved in with us and commuted everyday but his loans couldn't cover the cost of everything so he had to work to support us; we hardly saw him. After his graduation he went out and came back drunk. He walked out the next morning and we never saw him again."

"Dawn," What could I say? "I'm sorry."

She looked over at me and smiled, "its okay, we were better off without him anyway. But there's more..."

I stayed silent, signalling for her to continue, "Four years later my only close relative was murdered, my nanna. The police turned into wankers when they found out there were no witnesses that could testify so they gave up. What made it worse is that she'd come to visit for the weekend. I was running late home from work- I worked in a bank-and when I got home, she was on the floor, blood pouring out of her head, and it was too late to do anything. She was gone."

Her breathing hitched and if she could cry she would be. I walked over to her and wrapped my arms around her. The world was an unfortunate place where fate controlled our lives, I mean, look at us now. This was never something we could have imagined and despite the obstacles I seemed to face at every corner of a never-ending maze, I was glad that I hadn't lost Charlie in the process. I suppose him to me was like Dawn's grandma was to her.

"After that, I asked my boss for a transfer. The bank was a worldwide corporation so I got my green card and Jenna and I came to the states."

"You don't have to tell me, Dawn, You're getting upset about it." I pleaded. I didn't want to see her like this, especially not on Christmas.

"I'm fine; it's good to talk about it with someone. Shane doesn't know what happened before I came to America." She went back to washing the dishes at a slow rhythmic pace, "I changed my first name when I moved, paranoid that someone would find me. Veronica, well, _Ronnie_ was left behind along with my old life."

I contemplated my next question before I decided to ask it, "Do you miss her? Ronnie I mean?"

"Some days," She replied sincerely, glancing at me, "More recently than I used to. I never did when we first moved. I was given a new lease of life with Jenna and it felt good to leave the past behind. We were comfortable with our new life. Jenna had settled well and for the first time in a long time I was truly happy." Her eyes turned back to her job as she continued, "One day we'd secured a good deal and the boss decided to treat us all to a late lunch. He took us to this small bistro close to the bank and it was there that I met...," She hesitated, drawing in a shaky breath, "Justin's father."

She appeared to have the same trouble saying his name as I did with Edward's. Even _that_ thought caused my chest to tighten considerably in the place my heart lay confined, long dead since he left. Maybe it was in a male vampire's ability to dazzle human, female suitors.

"He was flirty and kind and the most handsome man I'd ever seen. He was completely different to Richard but there was something that drew me in. His eyes were violet, which at the time I thought strange but beautiful, and his long dirty blond hair looked so soft. I stayed in his company until the taxi's arrived for the staff. When it was time to go he asked me out with him the following night. I turned him down at first but he just smiled and said 'I'll look forward to the chase'. The next day he came to my office with a stunning bunch of flowers and asked me to have dinner with him. I thought it was a romantic gesture so I agreed he could pick me up from my place after work. I'd never felt more excited. I can still remember the butterflies in my stomach and the small grin I had on my face for the rest of the day, hoping that this would be the happiness I deserved...

"That night he picked me up in stylish car; different to what I thought it would be, I had it in my head that he'd have a beat up old car, like a battered Camaro or something so I was surprised when a polished, black Audi R8 sat outside my apartment building. He was dressed in a suit and his hair was pulled back but some of it dangled lose in the front and he had that smile that melted me plastered across his face." He voice and her expression conflicted, giving off two contrasting emotions: desire and disgust. "Anyway, he took me to a little restaurant out of town and charmed his way into my heart in one hour. I was too stunned to notice that he never ate one bite of the meal he'd ordered. The teasing turned into more and soon I found myself on the way to 'his place'." She articulated with matching hand gestures. "It was there that everything changed."

She resumed washing the dishes with more force than necessary, still aware that it only took a small amount of pressure for them to shatter in her palms, allowing her overriding memories to play like a movie. I remained silent, giving her the time to continue when she could as I continued dry the crockery she cleaned.

She exhaled sharply through her nose before she carried on, "We got into bed but there was no foreplay or anything, he touched me roughly and at first it turned me on, but then his grip burned to the point I was screaming at him to stop but he was relentless. He took me roughly and my legs ached that much, I had no idea if he'd just ripped me in two. I _begged_ and I _pleaded_ but he wouldn't _stop_!" Her face was crumpled and I wanted nothing more that to ask her to stop but she was trapped now, in her own mind, recounting the night that changed her, "The worst part was when he threw me against the wall, so fast my head blurred and I only just heard him say, 'I always wanted to know what a human would feel like'. He looked at me for the first time then and the violet was gone and all I saw was a pure red surrounding his pupils and I froze. I couldn't scream; I just let him take me praying that I would survive so I could get home to Jenna.

"He finished and when he did, something in him changed. He became tender, in a way. He took me back to the bed, straightened my clothes and then kissed me. He told me I was beautiful and that if I wasn't tempting his thirst then he'd probably keep me for himself. I was too scared to say anything so I just lay there, waiting for him to say something. He moved away from the bed to the window so I got up and ran for the door but he was in front of me in an instant. He looked at me and told me that it would be pointless saying anything to anyone because he'd never be found. He kissed me roughly then opened the door and let me leave. As I ran out, I ran past a woman with the same red eyes but never thought of anything at the time. I went home and cried thinking that somehow I'd deserved all of it, all the shit in my life and the added bruises on my skin."

She rubbed the heel of her palm into her eye before she carried on, "I found out I was pregnant a week later. I cried myself to sleep every night, and as my stomach expanded I came to realise that this child wasn't a normal child. I'll never forgive myself for what I put Jenna through. She took care of me and I sort of forgot that she was only eight years old. She burnt herself and I realised that I'd stopped being a mum to her and that she still needed me. I had to give up my job anyway so I took us both to Mississippi. I explained to her as best as I could what was happening but I tried to hide it as much as I could. A week after we'd gotten to Mississippi, I went into labour but there wasn't much I could do. I could feel him eating at my insides, trying to get out. Jenna was still in the house so I had to get away, I couldn't let her see me and I didn't know what would happen to me in the end so I crawled into the woods that connected to our garden so she couldn't see me and just collapsed." She finally looked up at me, "I could feel it Bella, the pain of losing love and the fear that I might not see my children grow up. Even when I felt him bite me and the burning began, nothing could overpower that sense of loss."

"Dawn, please, you don't have to talk about this." I tried again but she shook me off with a small smile.

"It got better." She told me, "I'm not sure about the time frame but about a day later, Shane turned up. I didn't know him but he must have smelt the blood and came to investigate. He took Justin in his arms and sat with me once he understood what was happening. He explained everything to me; what he was, what I was becoming and what I was to expect. He talked to me to keep me distracted, explaining about bloodlust and said, if I wanted it, he would help me through it. I manage to tell him that my daughter was in the house. I was terrified that I would hurt her but he said he'd show me another way; that I didn't have to survive on humans; animals were just as satisfying. It was then I noticed his yellow eyes and everything fell into place. He looked after Jenna and Justin whilst my change took place and once I turned he took me on my first hunt. I did well the first time but on the second I had a lapse and it was only when I saw the limp body of a hiker under me that I felt utterly disgusted with myself. I knew I'd killed an innocent person, but knowing that my daughter's blood could appeal to me hurt even more. I wasn't safe to be around and Shane knew that too. He forced me to stay away from her for three month-"

"Three months?" I exclaimed. If anyone tried to force me away from Renesmee for that amount of time, I'd probably kill them. She was everything to me. But then again, if I had been in Dawn's position, I would probably allow it if it meant keeping her safe.

"I still saw her, the first night I went home but held my breath. I told her that everything was going to be okay and that I was stronger. She fell in love with Justin immediately and took on the big sister role. He never bit her; I think he understood that he shouldn't. She didn't really understand who Shane was for a few weeks but because he was there full time and the motivation of being able to see them kept me focused, she sort of fell in love with him. He didn't let me back in the house fulltime until my eyes were yellow and by then they were calling him 'Uncle Shane'" She laughed at the memory; I was relieved that the smile on her face was back. "You already know about how he found out about mine and Justin's gift, but it was a while after that we found out about his second. It was one particular day in the summer last decade when he told me and Shane that he had this weird feeling, like someone was connecting themselves to him physically and all he could think was that each day it was getting stronger. Of course I was concerned but we didn't know at the time so we ignored it. That was until _she_ showed up."

"Who?" I questioned as I picked up the last plate to dry.

"The woman I saw that night. She just appeared out of nowhere. There was such malice in her eyes that it frightened me, her hair looked on fire and her eyes...I'd expected red, but they were black. I wasn't trained to fight and she was raring to. She told me that she was going to kill Jenna and I because I took _him_ away from her. She claimed she was his mate and that since me he hadn't been the same with her. He'd forbidden her to come after me but since he'd been killed she could take all the revenge she wanted. She demanded I hand over Justin because he belonged to, to..." She took a deep breath and continued, "I refused and she attacked. Luckily, Shane was there and he knew how to fight. She ran away and he told us we had to leave. Justin told us that the link he felt was to _her_ and he worried that it was something evil in him. It was then that Shane figured out that it was a second power. Like with his other, they opposed his parent's ability."

Placing the plate in the cupboard I picked up the last item on the side, the large glass bowl and began to dry slowly. Dawn drained the water in the basin and turned to face me as she continued.

"That's why we move around a lot. She's not given up. That's the reason I know what love being ripped away feels like. It's okay now but whenever Justin can sense her, I'm reminded of a love that never existed and the added consequence of having a demonic, blood-thirsty, red-headed bitch chasing us around the country." She finished bitterly.

"How long has it been since she last time she..." my question trailed of, not really sure how to phrase it.

Dawn smiled slightly, animating her features, "Longer that I expected actually, almost a year. I'd like to think someone has killed her or that she's finally given up." She sighed despondently, "But I'll never let my guard down. I'll always be waiting for her face to appear somewhere." She scoffed to herself, "_Victoria,_"

My head snapped up to look at her, "What did you say?" I couldn't help the distaste that fell off my tongue as I replied.

Dawn looked me over, her brows furrowing slightly before explaining, "Victoria, that's her name."

_Red-head, hair looked on fire, all the revenge she wanted, Victoria, he'd been killed, 'look forward to the chase, long dirty blond hair..._

_It's not possible_, "Please tell me his name wasn't James," I begged, pleading internally that it was just a sadistic coincidence that forced us to have this connection.

If it were possible, Dawn's face grew whiter, her eyes widening in a mask of horror, "How- How did you know?" She whispered.

"_Oh my god_," I whispered. James was Justin's father. I was the reason he was dead. Not long after he'd raped Dawn, he came for me. Renesmee's father killed Justin's. Victoria was after both of us. My head was spinning whilst Dawn remained silent, coming to terms with her confusion. In my turmoil, the light grasp I had on the glass bowl faltered and I let it fall, not caring as the glass shattered onto the hardwood floor. The tiny flecks of glass sprung off in multiple directions, tickling my feet and dusting the floor in what looked like miniscule clumps of diamond.

I could do nothing but stare into Dawn's eyes, unable to compose myself as I sensed our families move in the other room. Silence surrounded us until I finally broke it.

"Dawn," I crocked. What was I supposed to say, "Dawn, he...James, he was the one that attacked me. Remember, I told you about the baseball field and..." I trailed off.

"Wait, so the vampire that's in La Push. The one that's after you for revenge is," She gulped, "...Victoria?"

"The red-head?" Jake interrupted. I blinked at everyone gathered in the doorway of the kitchen watching us with uncertainty. I nodded in reply. "What's going on?" He asked.

I couldn't speak. I looked back at Dawn and the understanding spread across us both at the same time. A silent message passed through the air as we both tensed at the realisation.

"Mom," Came Renesmee's voice, "What about Victoria? Is she back?"

I smiled at my daughter, trying to reassure her, "No she's not... but it seems we aren't the only people she's trying to kill."

Dawn whimpered, "You don't think that she knows we're both here do you? She wouldn't try to-"

"She won't get near any of you; we'll make sure of that." Jake spoke collectively for the pack.

"Yeah, and Mum, if she was tracking me I'd feel it so we've got nothing to worry about. "Justin inputted.

"Although, Dawn, I would suggest you all stay here for safety. If she does know then you'll be better in a larger group." Jake suggested.

I sighed but it was Charlie's gruff voice that broke us out of it, "Not that this isn't entertaining, but do we really have to get into this now? Its Christmas folks, can we enjoy it?"

The tension thinned, lifting the mood of everyone as they led each other back onto into the family room. Renesmee remained in the doorway looking at me, worrying her lip, a habit she'd inherited from me.

"Baby, don't worry. Everything will be fine; it just took us by surprise, that's all." I told her calmly, "You go with Dawn into the others whilst I clean this up."

Dawn moved forward and wrapped her arm across Ness' shoulders, leading her into the other room.

I made quick work of the mess I'd made, dumping it into the trash before I wiped down the counters. I was shouted numerous times by everyone to come and join them in watching the film they'd selected as I finished. I through the dishcloth into the empty basin and was heading to join them all when a knock came from the front door. I walked over to it and pulled it open before the smell hit me.

I was roughly pushed aside and the two of them came through the threshold without being invited and turned in the hall facing me. Their faces were still perfection, even more so through my vampire eyes. I hadn't seen either of them since I was human.

"Excuse me," I hissed, "what do you think you're doing? _Get out of my house_!"

"Not until you hear us out, Bella!" Rosalie yelled back.

"I have nothing to say to you!"

"But we have stuff to say to you!"

"I don't want to hear it!" I snapped back

Rosalie stepped into my personal space, threateningly menace, "Well, you're going to!"

"GET OUT!" Jake shouted from behind me, spitting through his teeth; his body already vibrating with anger.

"Shut it, dog, you have no authority here!" She countered.

"_But I do_!" Charlie's voice came from behind, "Rosalie, Emmett, neither of you have any right to come onto my property unannounced, particularly not to shout in my daughter's face. You've been told twice, but now _I'm_ telling you...Leave." His voice was calm and controlled, carrying a grace and power than no one else had.

"Chief Swan-" Emmett tried this time.

"LEAVE!" I shouted, completely losing my temper.

"DAMN IT, BELLA!" Emmett lost it too, "We just want to know what happened to you! We have a right to know considering we bought you into all of this. It's tearing us apart not knowing what happened and with you being so hostile towards us all, the Bella that we knew has changed and we just want to know what we can do to help, we want to know you but you're not giving us the chance! _Please_, we've missed you!"

I scoffed at the nerve of him, "Bella, listen-"

"No, _you _listen. I don't want to hear anything any of you have to say to me, I don't care. _You_ left _me_ and I've moved on. You weren't concerned for me when I needed you the most so you _do not_ have the right to show concern now." I was fuming, revealing more than I wanted to, "Christmas day of all days, are you serious?"

Emmett sighed, Rosalie folded her arms in annoyance, "Okay, so today may have been a bad day, but Bella, you don't know what's happened to our family, we've not been the same. We're not blaming you-" He defended as I glared, "We're just trying to get you to see that you mean a lot to us and we just want the chance to explain and hear your story, I mean, you have a sister now?" He asked in disbelief.

I saw Rosalie's eyes flicker to Renesmee and I had to suppress a growl. I didn't answer him but what Dawn said earlier came back to me: her identity would be better coming from me, "Not today." I told them, "Give me three days and I'll come over. I 'm not staying long and that does _not_ mean I want you back in my life. As far as I'm concerned, you are all _dead_ to me, am I clear?" That was probably low and I wanted to believe it. As much as I wanted to protect Renesmee and as much as I hated them for what they did, I didn't hate them enough for them to die.

Emmett looked withdrawn but nodded anyway, "That's all we can ask."

The front door was still wide open so I stepped aside gesturing for them to leave. They took the hint and left, Jake slamming the door behind them.

Everyone remained silent, allowing everything that happened in the last few minutes to sink in. I looked at Renesmee and saw the fear on her face. I pulled her into a hug and kissed her head.

"I'm coming with you." She mumbled into my chest. I nodded knowing that she wouldn't want me there without her. I planned on bringing Jake with me anyway.

"So am I." Dawn told me, "I'll call Shane and tell him what's happened. He'll be there too."

I sighed, clinging to my daughter, "Thank you,"

_Three days._

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><p><strong>This chapter had been a nightmare to write. I've scrapped three drafts before creating one I was remotely satisfied with. Sorry to reviewer's last chapter as I haven't had a chance to reply. I will redeem myself now though so please REVIEW<strong>

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	22. Chapter 22

**My absence was purely necessary but I am truly sorry. For the past few month I have been dealing with arguments with my mum, final year exam, a shit load of reading material to get through and to top it off, my nanna was rushed to hospital as has just been moved out of the intensive critical care unit. My time off is justified but I as extremely sorry that you've waited nearly two months for this. I hope it matches your expectations.**

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><p><strong>:Twilight character names belong to Stephenie Meyer. All characterisations, plot lines, descriptions and additional details belong to the respective author. No copying or reproduction of this work is permitted without personally written authorisation. ©2011 Jezzyem, [2303/13]. All rights reserved worldwide.**

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><p>For the first time in years I was agitated and nervous at what lay ahead. The three days had passed and I had to keep my word. Everyone deserved the truth and I knew without a doubt that if I were to go against my word then they would come after me, full force.<p>

I knew what they wanted but I wasn't prepared to give it to them. I told myself that I didn't want them back in my life, but every time I thought that, it pained me. I liked to think that it was a reminder of the pain I'd endured, caused by their disappearance. but I knew subconsciously that it was more than that. It was a feeling I'd ignored every time I saw one of them. I suppressed the urge to act upon it because either way they hurt me; I'd be damned if I allowed them to hurt Renesmee too.

She was my main focus in this; the sole reason that I was putting myself in their proximity. I was her mother; the one person that was supposed to protect her, her entire life; even now. The whole point of me visiting today as to let them know of her existence and that was it. Emmett said that the 'Bella' they knew had gone and I knew that to some degree it was true. She'd gone the day they left and in her place was a woman who wasn't the naive, fragile human I once resembled, I was a mother first and foremost, one that would tackle anything and anyone for my offspring. This was me doing that.

I knew Renesmee was curious about her family. It was evident in her thought process. The questions that erupted during her younger years – the ones I dismissed – constantly played on her mind. Granted, the impression she had of them was one they had caused themselves where Edward attacked her but even before then she built a dislike for them, and that came from me. I couldn't be responsible for that – not now, but in years to come when she would possibly be rid of them, her curiosity would overpower her and letting the opportunity pass would lead to regret – something she'd blame me for.

At the moment, the prospect of confronting them all scared her, I could tell. It scared me too but I tried to hide it. The only person that could really tell was Charlie; I couldn't hide it from him. He came to me last night whilst I was furiously cleaning the kitchen, removing every dust speck and micro-sized dirt from the countertops and shelves of the kitchen, "_I know you're scared, Bells, but you're a strong, beautiful woman who is capable of protecting this family like you want. But remember that nobody is expecting you to be a martyr or a dictator or anything other than yourself. Now, I don't like you doing this and if I knew I could keep them out of this town – heck, even the state – then I would. But, I trust you to do what's right, we all do, and if that means talking to them then you do that. You won't be blamed if nothing comes from it or if you can't go through with it. Bells, you may be stronger than me and more agile but you don't need to go through this alone for the sake of keeping everyone happy. I'm still your father and if you're not happy then neither am I. Despite what you are now, you'll always be my baby girl. So go do what's right for your baby girl_."

Charlie was grounded but he knew when to say the right thing, even if it did end with, "_If anyone find out that the chief can be a sap, I'm holding you responsible."_

Thinking back to his talk my nerves had cooled off but my agitation remained as I franticly cleaned the family room: straightening cushions, ironing out the curtains with my fingers, dusting the TV, re-angling the furniture; waiting for my entourage to assemble.

At first, my plan was to bring Jacob but then Nessie asked to come along. Dawn then said she was and that she was calling Shane, thus resulting in both Jenna and Justin wanting to tag along too. Justin reasoned that "Jenna would back Nessie and I'm here for the muscle". Originally, I was completely against the idea, not wanting the Cullens to think that I anticipated a fight, but then I reasoned that they knew I knew Carlisle's view on violence, and actually having a large group accompany me would prove to them that I meant business; the only reason I was there was to get them to leave me alone and talk about Renesmee's heritage.

My cleaning continued as I looked for meagre job to complete. I was alone in the house with my thoughts as I waited: Jake had taken Charlie up to La Push just in case with Ness tagging along, Dawn and Justin had gone to the woods to meet Shane and to hunt before we left and Jenna was sat on the porch steps humming to herself lightly as she waited for her Uncle to appear. Surprisingly, the rhythmic thumping of Jenna's heart soothed me. Not in the sense that it was appealing, just that it sounded extremely similar to Ness's own fluttering organ.

Finding nothing else to do I went to join her on the porch, taking the seat beside her. She looked over at me and smiled, continuing humming the song I recognised as The Beatles' 'All You Need Is Love'; fitting for the situation we were in. She must have sensed my unease as she rested her head on my shoulder encircling her right arm around my left as we waited for someone to show up.

-o0o-

The thrill of running always made me smile. The exhilaration from attacking the wind and pushing my limit was always enticing to me. It only vaguely registered now as I ran through the trees towards the outskirts of the town where the large white house was located. I led the group with Renesmee on my right, Justin to the left (the one person with a devilish grin plastered across his face). Dawn ran behind whilst Shane and Jake (in his wolf form) bought up the rear, Jenna wrapped securely on Shane's back. She'd missed him.

To say it was my first time meeting Shane face to face, the fierce protectiveness that oozed from him earned immediate respect from me and to think he was putting himself in this position for someone he'd never met – someone he'd only heard about through his 'family' – made me indebted to him. Shane was like I expected: tall, broad and handsome with his wide hazel eyes and his light brown hair. He came in wearing white sneakers, jeans, a tight grey t-shirt that was taut around his chest and a Yankees baseball cap. He was carrying a black jacket over his arm and a traveller's rucksack over his shoulder. Given his size and nature, Jake and he had somewhat of a pissing contest, sizing each other up until Justin broke the tension, refocussing them on the task at hand. Since then they gained a mutual respect due to the same feelings they both inhabited.

I could hear the trickle of the stream looming as we came nearer and nearer, my first indication that we weren't far away now. The second clue was the mixture of different scents that bombarded us as we approached. Jacob sneezed.

The house became visible through the branches of the trees and I knew then that it was too late to turn around. My speed slowed until I was walking at a human pace, taking me to the edge of the forest's lining. Jacob disappeared then came back in human form, bare feet and cut off jean shorts. Surveying the house from where I stood I realised that it had been a little over nine years since I last looked at this. I came here when I was pregnant with Renesmee looking for any clues that I could find them and beg for help. I had no clue what was happening to me and the only support system I had was a human who had no clue about this supernatural world and a wolf that hated what was growing inside of me. Finding nothing, I simply reminisced and let myself get lost in my memories as I wandered from room to room, imagining that it was all real; that the love, the laughter, the atmosphere wasn't a façade. It was only once I stood against his grand piano in the last part of the room, I remember standing in with them on my birthday before everything came to surface, that I let my emotions free, crying myself into an oblivion that lasted what felt like days.

Amidst my sorrow, I felt Renesmee's hand slip into mine giving a small, reassuring squeeze. I looked at her a smiled showed my appreciation for the small act of love.

"It's not too late to turn around." She whispered to me.

I inhaled deeply through my nose turning back to the house. A silhouette appeared in one of the second story windows, observing us through the trees. Instinctively I knew it was him. Edward. I broke my gaze away from him when I heard the front door open and a click of hollow shoes announcing someone's presence on the porch.

I glanced back at Ness, "Yes it is." It was now or never.

I took a stride forward making sure my shield covered everyone present as it naturally did, leading my family and friends toward the house.

As expected, Carlisle was waiting for us at the top of the porch, the front door still open. Carlisle was never a nervous person, he always struck me as someone that would keep the peace and resolve situations. The flicker of his eyes gave away his emotions; he was just as unsure about this as I was. I walked up the steps and stood in front of him, waiting. He played with his fingers as his eyes scanned my face. I could see the internal battle as he wondered how to greet me.

I exhaled sharply in irritation, not really wanting to be here but seeing no alternative. With that, he simply said "Welcome back, Bella."

I narrowed my eyes at him making him aware of my current feelings about being here. I didn't belong here – not anymore. Carlisle walked into the house, leaving the door open for us to follow. I turned to look over my shoulder at everyone. Renesmee was stood directly behind me, a shy smile gracing her face in encouragement. She was scared.

Because of that, I squared my shoulders and walked over the threshold, keeping my family behind me, making sure their thoughts were guarded from invasion.

Nothing about the house had changed; everything was just as I remembered: the white walls were still pristine, the furniture in exactly the same place, the floors free in from any particle of dirt aside from the faint imprints of footsteps.

As expected, they were all congregated in the adjoining family room, stood with their respective mates. They'd positioned themselves like they were posing for a family portrait – probably unintentionally. Alice and Jasper stood to the right of the room near the television, Jasper slightly in front of Alice as if he were shielding her. The adjustment to his posture came as soon as Jacob's scent swirled in the room. Rosalie and Emmett stood to the left, closer to the wall than Alice and Jasper, Emmett stood behind Rosalie with his arms wrapped around her waist holding her against his body. Edward stood behind the arm of the U-shaped white couch that sat in the centre of the room so he could still observe from behind Esme and Carlisle who stood central – the heads of the coven – with their arms wrapped around each other's waist.

My gaze flicked over each individual catching their hazel eyes – some more vibrant than others – as a show of power against them. If I'd still been human, my heart would have given my true feelings away. I felt and heard my family spread out behind me, mirroring the Cullen's positioning. The familiar heartbeat told me that Renesmee stood firmly behind me acting as my source of calm and clarity whilst she used my body as a shield. Her heart was beating faster than usual and I knew why it was.

I caught Edward's eyes flicker to where she stood and that only sparked my anger more. I flexed my fist involuntary and the movement wasn't lost on anyone. It was that that caused Carlisle to begin the conversation.

"Whatever you may think, Bella, we didn't invite you here to fight." He spoke softly, eyeing everyone that stood behind me.

I clicked my tongue; a sign of my aggravation, "I understand that, Carlisle, but if you think that I would come here – a place that houses seven vampires – alone, then you were sadly mistaken."

My tone was harsh and venomous, nothing like I had anticipated, but I was set in the decision to keep my guard up at all times. I wasn't going to let them fool me. Okay, maybe I sounded harsh as I didn't know their intentions but I wasn't prepared to drop my guard.

Carlisle's eyes clouded over with an emotion I refused to analyse, as did Esme's. He sighed and averted his eyes before replying, "Would you consider talking to us in private then? Your company can wait outside-"

"Not a chance, Doc!" Jacob interrupted, "We're staying where we are. You think I'd trust you to not hurt her again?"

As much as I valued Jacob's dedication to my wellbeing, I could feel Renesmee tense behind me; her heart beat quickening. Someone growled in front of me but I didn't pay attention as I reached my hand back. Ness took it and I gave her a light squeeze reassuring her like she had done for me outside.

"We only did what we thought was best for-"

Jacob scoffed, "Best for whom, exactly? Best for you? 'We'll just rid ourselves of the burden before she can do any damage, let's not worry about Bella, she's a mere human who isn't worth our time'. Is that it?"

As Jacob mocked them, I couldn't pretend that his words didn't cut into my heart. I prayed that my face wouldn't give away my emotions; hoping that it remained stoic and neutral. I'd confided my feelings to Jacob; he was only regurgitating how their leaving made me feel – worthless and weak.

Renesmee's other hand curled into the back of my shirt, twisting it into her fist. Out of worry, upset or anger, I couldn't be sure.

"Listen, Dog, we left to protect her. I didn't want to hurt her by dragging her into our world; it was too dangerous." Edward spat.

"Well, look how well that turned out!" Sarcasm laced his voice but he was relentless. Somewhere in the back of my mind I was astonished that his anger hadn't caused him to phase yet.

I was most aware of how seven sets of eyes were drawn to me in that instant, "Forever eighteen, how 'bout that?" Jacob spoke rhetorically, throwing his arms above his head dramatically

He continued, "Did it not occur to you that the moment you told her about what you were that you damned her life – that you'd already 'dragged' her into it? Not to mention you forgot about that feral red-head that is apparently looking for revenge! Congratulations bloodsucker, you single-handedly ruined her life."

Edward blanched, "Victoria?" A collective gasp echoed around the open room from the seven people who didn't know she was a regular visitor.

Renesmee's hand still rested in mine and I was shocked by the thoughts that ran through her mind. Jake's words could be heard by everyone, but they weren't just affecting me. They impacted her thoughts and I knew that she often let her imagination run wild. In that moment, all she was doing what thinking the same three statements over and over:_ I'm sorry, Mom, I'm so so sorry. If it wasn't for me then you'd still be human. I'm sorry, it's my fault_.

At that I reacted, "Jacob," I warned.

He chose to ignore me, "So you remember her then? I thought you forgot about her considering you left a human to defend herself against one of your kind."

Edward's head whipped round to look at Alice. She stuttered, "Edward, I – I didn't see anything, I swear. She wasn't – she..." She was at a loss of words. Of course, even I hadn't expected Victoria to act so ferociously against James' death so how could Alice have known to look?

Jacob went to snap some more but Renesmee's thoughts were growing more and more frantic as the conversation continued. Before he had the chance, I cut him off, much sharper this time.

Catching his attention, he looked down at me, his eyes blazing. Keeping Renesmee's hand in mine I touched her fingers to Jacob's palm, allowing him to see what this was doing to her. His eyes immediately showed regret; his anger diminishing rapidly as he listened to Renesmee's train of thought.

I sighed despondently before turning back to the Cullens. My eyes caught sight of their confusion and I saw Edward subtly shake his head in the negative; obviously answering an unspoken question.

"Penny for your thoughts, Bloodsucker?" Jacob teased, folding his arms over his chest.

Edward's eyes narrowed at us, flicking down to our hands which were still entwined around Ness'.

Jacob chuckled, "No, but I'd bet you'd give _millions _to let you hear ours."

"Are you the reason that Edward can't read anyone's mind?" Jasper asked out of curiosity. Despite his calm demeanour, defence remained in his posture and his voice.

"You should count yourself lucky that you can't hear what I have to think. My memories are still clear, especially seeing as I was there to witness everything that Bella went through."

"Stop it!" I yelled, "This is not what we're here for!" I turned to Jake, "Watch what you're saying, they aren't the only ones this is affecting." I flicked my eyes to Renesmee, a silent pleas that he stop bringing this topic up.

"She's right. We're not here to talk about the past." Dawn came forward, rescuing me from having to listen to this anymore.

"Funny, I thought that's why we were here." Rosalie scoffed, "Not that I haven't got anything better to do, but I thought the whole point of you coming here was to talk about what's happened in the last ten years; namely, a lot."

"Can it, Blondie, you never cared about Bella before, so why now?"

"Listen Dog, I never disliked _Bella_, I disliked her choices, and now I'm concerned for the human's safety."

Renesmee stiffened behind me, "Excuse me?" I hissed catching Rosalie off guard with the venom that enveloped my voice, "What was that about a human?"

She huffed, flipping her hair over her left shoulder. "Face it, Bella, you're less than a decade old and even then, vampires are still practically newborns, yet you have the audacity to invite a human into your family? Are you a masochist or insane?! One day you're going to snap and that human will be at the receiving end of it, its inevitable!"

The anger burned inside me. Not only was she questioning me but referring to my daughter in that manner had me bristling beneath my iron hard skin.

"She does have a point." Alice muttered.

My glare turned to her, "What?"

Alice looked apologetic as she explained, "Bella, Nessie's nineteen years old and to be in a family with a vampire just shows she'd had a fragile life, your endanger-"

I held my hand up in front of me averting my eyes from her, "I'll stop you right there!" I'd never heard my voice as menacing as right this second, "You know nothing – _nothing_ about my life _or_ Nessie's life, so I suggest you _stop_ with the assumptions.

For your information, human blood does not appeal to me and one drop has not passed my lips." That was kind of true. The only time I had tasted blood is when I had to seal Renesmee's cuts a few years ago that she'd gained from cliff- diving with the pack. "She's my family and it's staying that way and if you dare come between us then I will kill you, I don't care that I once considered you family. You're not anymore."

Taken aback at my comment and how I delivered it, the room remained quiet, "Coming here was a mistake; we're leaving."

I took one last glance at the Cullens and turned my back on them, pushing Renesmee toward the door. But, before I could take a step, someone grabbed a hold of my arm and pulled me to face them.

I hissed as I found myself face-to-face with Edward, "Bella, please. You have to know that I only left to protect you! I did what was best for you!"

"Stop it!" I cried, pushing him away from me. "The only thing you did was leave me broken. _You_, Edward Cullen, broke my heart when you left me alone in that godforsaken forest. _You_ were the one I followed after you ran! _You_ made me feel worthless and unloved. You played me and I curse myself everyday for believing that you actually wanted me! I can't believe how naive I was to believe everything, but, guess what? I've changed! I'm no longer that human that you can manipulate a play with. You ruined me and if you ever think that I will come crawling back to your family, begging to be included again then you can think again!"

My breathing was coming out ragged. The pent up emotions that I had been holding back were finally coming forward. Sometime during my speech, Renesmee had left the house, followed by Jenna. It was too much for her to here. She felt my pain but I couldn't hide it. They – the Cullens – evidently bought out the worst in me.

"When you left," I swallowed, "When you said goodbye, and told me that –"

Edward's eyes bore into mine before he whispered, "After all the thousand times I've told you I love you, how could you let one word break your faith in me?"

I growled in frustration, "Will you stop it! You don't have to pretend anymore! It has been almost ten years, Edward. Nine years, three months to be exact. I can't – I won't listen to this! It's not why I'm here."

He ran his hand into his hair, the copper reflecting off of the light left in the overcast sky. I internally cursed myself for still finding attraction in his features.

He took a step closer to me his eyes blazing; pupils dilated. I stood frozen. "Why can you believe the lie, but not the truth?"

I shook my head, trying to remove myself from the spell that he cast. "Stop it." I whispered in defeat. I cleared my throat before I continued, "I came here to talk about Nessie – Renesmee."

It was the first time I'd allowed her real name to be heard in their presence. I watched them all closely to see if the name triggered any clarity but without Edward to listen into thoughts, there was nothing that could confirm even the smallest suspicion. As far as I knew, none of them knew Edward and I had ever been...intimate.

"What about her?" Esme spoke for the first time.

I battled with myself before I could speak. Was I certain that this was the right thing to do? What of it wasn't?

I felt Dawn squeeze my arm in reassurance. Looking up, I saw her smile tightly and nod her head in confirmation.

Taking a deep breath I began, "There's something you need to know about her, something you'll no doubt have a lot of questions about, but you need to listen to me fully before you question it. Can you promise me that?"

I watched as each of them nodded simultaneously.

I took a nervous breath in preparation of telling them that Renesmee was half vampire; that she was Edward's biological daughter.

But again, fate had a way of intervening. Just as I opened my mouth to tell them, I heard it; heart-wrenching scream that turned my heart inside out. It had me running out of the door without a second glance. I was fully aware of the footsteps that echoed behind me, but none of that mattered anymore.

What mattered most was finding the source of that cry because it was no mistake that it had come from Renesmee.

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><p><strong>Please REVIEW. Reviews show me that I have the support that Bella has from her family <strong>

**Previous reviewers know that the next update will be the end of April as I am going to Disneyland, Florida on Tuesday for a fortnight meaning that I won't have time to write the majority of the chapter until I get back.**

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	23. Chapter 23

**Not nearly as long as last time, but longer than I hoped.**

**When it gets to the cliff bit, imagine the cliffs from Eclipse when Emmett and Paul attack each other when they're all chasing Victoria.**

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><p><strong>:T<strong>**wilight character names belong to Stephenie Meyer. All characterisations, plot lines, descriptions and additional details belong to the respective author. No copying or reproduction of this work is permitted without personally written authorisation. ©2011 Jezzyem, [03/05/13]. All rights reserved worldwide.**

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><p>"Listen Dog, I never disliked <em>Bella<em>, I disliked her choices, and now I'm concerned for the human's safety."

Rosalie's words had me stiffen. Despite her beauty, the fire and ice that lingered beneath the surface made my blood run cold. I averted my eyes away from her glare.

"Excuse me?" Mom hissed, "What was that about a human?"

I heard Rosalie huff but was paying too much attention to the floor and the feel of my hand in my mom's to notice anything else. I was desperately trying to control my thoughts, praying that she was too focused to pay attention to my over active mind.

"Face it, Bella, you're less than a decade old and even then, vampires are still practically newborns, yet you have the audacity to invite a human into your family? Are you a masochist or insane?!" That last comment made me look up at her, glaring at the statuesque blonde. To think that she could question anything about me or my mother completely baffled me. She had no right! "One day you're going to snap and that human will be at the receiving end of it, it's inevitable!"

I knew I shouldn't pay attention to what these Cullens said; I made my choice and my loyalty lay with my family. But Rosalie's words made me feel even more worthless than I already did. I knew it was my fault that Mom lost her life, and deep down I felt that Jake blamed me for that too. I knew their love for me caused them to protest, but surely they knew that I was the one who 'killed' her.

"She does have a point." Alice muttered.

If possible, Mom stiffened even more "What?"

Alice looked apologetic, her eyes darting towards me before she explained, "Bella, Nessie's nineteen years old and to be in a family with a vampire just shows she's had a fragile life, your endanger-"

Mom's hand shot out in front of her cutting off Alice's speech, "I'll stop you right there!" Her voice was low and sadistic, something I'd never heard before. My hand gripped the back of her shirt tighter. "You know nothing – _nothing_ about my life _or_ Nessie's life, so I suggest you _stop_ with the assumptions."

I chanced a glance behind me. Jake was next to me evaporating power, hate and excitement. Jenna was behind me and as I turned she offered me a small smile. Justin stayed close to Jenna whilst Shane stood closer to Dawn, using his body to shield her. His sights set on Emmett should anything arise.

"For your information, human blood does not appeal to me and one drop has not passed my lips." Mom explained causing Jaspers and Carlisle's eyed to widen. I wasn't sure if she noticed as she carried on, "She's my family and it's staying that way, and if you dare come between us then I will kill you, I don't care that I once considered you family. You're not anymore." This statement sounded final. It silenced the room; save for the beating hearts and the mixed rhythms of breathing.

Mom's voice was softer when she next spoke, "Coming here was a mistake; we're leaving."

She turned immediately and I jumped slightly. I tried to mask it, and didn't think anyone noticed other than me. Mom's gentle hands turned me around, her hand slipping to my back as she led me towards the front door. I didn't dare look back. I didn't want too.

But, then she wasn't there anymore. Her hands left me and I felt the breeze of her whipping around. It happened so fast. I spun as well, but Jake pulled me back so I wasn't close to Edward as he practically begged my mom, "Bella, please. You have to know that I only left to protect you! I did what was best for you!" Desperation, frustration, grief...they were all there in his voice.

I couldn't see his face thankfully as Jake stood in front of me, his arms spread as if he was shielding me. I could see and feel him fighting to keep his body from vibrating, knowing that if he were to phase, he wouldn't be able to stop himself from attacking.

My hand snapped to latch onto Jake's forearm as Mom reacted sharply, pushing Edward away from her. "Stop it!"

He barely moved, but gave her a small amount of space as she delivered her speech. "The only thing you did was leave me broken. _You_, Edward Cullen, broke my heart when you left me alone in that godforsaken forest. _You_ were the one I followed after you ran! _You_ made me feel worthless and unloved..."

The emotion in her voice sliced through me like a carving knife, ripping my heart from its place in my chest. I knew most of her story now, but even then she'd been extremely reserved and controlled. It pained me to hear her like this. So I made my decision to leave. I needed some space and air to collect myself.

"You played me and I curse myself everyday for believing that you actually wanted me!"

I opened my thoughts to Jake asking him to tell Bella that I loved her. I kissed his bicep then made my leave. I didn't turn back but I didn't run either; they were already suspicious of me. I didn't notice whether I had closed the door behind me or not. Regardless, I kept walking west into the forest, the opposite direction to which we came. The memories refused to be forgotten though and flowing through my mind was every emotion on Bella's face when they were mentioned, the way her voice sounded when she talked about them, or to them. It was because of them that the tears fell. They fell fast and caused sobs to rack my chest. I rested my head against the nearest trunk and hit it repeatedly, causing the bark to fly off in different directions.

"Nessie!" Jenna called. I didn't even hear her follow me.

I listened to her footsteps as she came closer. As she came around the corner, her footsteps stopped and she signed despondently, "Oh, Ness."

I looked up as she came closer, wrapping her arms around my shoulders and squeezing as she consoled me. My head slumped into her shoulder as she shushed and soothed.

"How-" My voice cracked. I cleared my throat, "How could he do that to her?"

I wanted an answer. I pulled back and looked at her, praying that _someone_ had the answer, "How could he leave her like that?"

Jenna pulled her eyebrows together as she opened her mouth to speak. But it wasn't from her mouth that the voice came.

"Oh honey, has Daddy been bad again?" The voice was condensing, and patronising. Nothing like what I had expected from the woman I saw when my head snapped up: medium height, barefoot, white fur lining her coat, a blaze of curly red hair and stout black eyes.

Jenna turned sharply and went to scream in surprise. The sound was captured by a hand that covered her mouth; a hand belonging to a weedy man, a little over twenty. It was a man with bright red eyes, more vibrant and alive than I had ever seen. _A newborn?_

Jenna's eyes were panicked but I had to look away and towards the woman who was now stood casually, leaning on her right foot, "You see, sweetie, Daddy's always been a naughty boy. At first, you're dear mommy was just going to pay the price, but now I'm afraid that it'll have to be you."

Her eyes averted to Jenna and she straightened up, her body stiffening, "And your mother's just a whore." Her voice was stiff, filled with jealousy and hatred instead of the condensing tone she used with me.

"I guess I'm effectively killing two birds with one stone," She grinned and giggled at her joke, her pearly whites on full display, "_Literally_."

I looked over at Jenna, whose eyes were filling with tears. The newborn had a tight grip on her and I feared that he was uncontrollable. I turned my eyes back to the woman just as she ran toward me.

I screamed...loud. I couldn't help it and I knew it would probably cause trouble but it was a natural reaction. Her hand clasped over mouth silencing the cry as her other hand went to my throat, cutting off my air supply. Her face was close to mine, her feral gaze boring into me.

"Don't do that again." She chastised. She lifted me off the ground by my throat, her sharp nails digging in, no doubt causing indentions. Then we were flying.

My hair flew into my face as she ran with me in her hands. My hands reached up to claw hers away from my face so I could breathe but she didn't ease. She stopped abruptly, her hand slipping from my throat. I gasped a coughed, trying to regain my breath. My knees buckled as a wave of dizziness passed but she caught me by the elbow, holding me erect like a child would a ragdoll. I sucked in oxygen, closing my eyes to get my breathing under control.

As I gained strength, I began to recognise where we were. The salted breeze kissed my skin as it blew around my face and lightly caressed my arms, the crashing waves below us signalled that we were high and stood close to the cliff edge. The clearing was only small, the rocky space big enough to fit six parked cars surrounded by a volume of high pine trees.

The vampire felt my strength returning and gripped my throat again to stop me from running, but not enough to cut off my windpipe, turning me so my back faced the open Pacific, her body still facing me. Jenna and her captor stood a little further away from us, his back protected by a rock that stood tall and stationary at one side. To the right of them, the cliff split creating a large gap between the cliff top where we stood and the other one roughly eight metres away. They were common around here.

I had no idea how far away from the house I had ventured before the vampire had discovered us, but given that Jenna was able to catch up quickly, I hoped that we were still close enough for someone to be alerted by my scream before we were taken up here.

A wolf's call echoed through the trees and immediately my heart beat picked up pace, if that was even possible at the present time. Hope radiated in my gut.

The woman's head whipped around her until she kept her gaze over my shoulder, her mouth curling up into a sly grin. She was anticipating this, and immediately my hope plummeted. That's when I heard the footsteps – fast ones.

Timed perfectly, the woman spun round so she was behind me, her hand moving to cover my mouth whilst her forearm pressed into my left shoulder securing my upper body to her chest. She was strong. The only added addition was the glint of metal I could see from the corner of my eye.

The faces of ten vampires, plus one wolf, appeared from the trees, my mom the forefront of it. She took in the scene rapidly, her eyes going from me, to Jenna, to the knife and to the woman – different emotions flicking over her features each time she spied a different thing.

Settling on the woman, she growled and went to step forward.

I let out a rather loud gasp as I felt the point touch my neck, halting Mom from approaching. Jake growled, pawing at the floor like a bull. I could hear growls from behind me on the opposite cliff top. This confirmed my suspicion that we were on the treaty line.

"Ah ah ah ah," The woman protested, "I wouldn't come any closer." Her voice was light and teasing.

"_Victoria,_" I heard from a male voice. _So this was Victoria_.

Mom growled, "Victoria, it's me you're after, not her."

I froze as I felt Victoria's face close to mine. She ran her cheek against my own, much like how a cat kisses up to its owner. I shuddered in response. "Oh, but she could prove very useful. They both could."

My eyes went to Jenna then, whose tears had fallen down her flushed cheeks. Her eyes were locked onto Dawn's who was being held back by Shane.

"They haven't done anything to you!" Justin shouted, stepping forward slightly, only to stop when Jenna whimpered. The newborn had stuck his face close to Jenna's, dramatically sniffing her hair.

"Riley, that's enough!" Victoria commanded. Turning back to Justin, her voice took on a wispy tone. "You must be Justin, the one who can sense me. Yes, I figured it out eventually. That's why I was so pleased to learn that the girls had made friends. I could track any single one of you and it would lead me to all of you... Gosh, you look so much like your father."

"I'm nothing like him!" Justin roared.

"Oh, but on the contrary, you are...so much like him." She continued in a sickly sweet one, "The looks, the personality, the anger...that's why I have a proposition for you."

She stepped away from me but didn't remove the knife from my throat. I gasped as her hand fell away and began collecting more oxygen, tears filling my eyes. My mom looked at me and I nodded, signalling I was okay. I could see her hands clenching and unclenching in conflict.

"Justin, I want you to come away with me; stay with me forever, and then I'll let your sister go."

"You bitch!" Dawn shouted, "My children and not pawn's in your game. The only person you should be angry at it the bastard that you once called your mate! He was the deceptive arsehole, not me, and certainly not my children."

"ENOUGH!" Victoria screeched, "You seduced him! It wasn't his fault! And it's your children that will pay the price for all of you."

"NO!" Mom yelled.

A scream slipped through my throat as Victoria yanked my hair back, pressing her face next to mine again. My head burned in the aftermath of it. The tears cascaded. I didn't trust breathing through my mouth, sticking instead to my nasal passage for oxygen.

"Oh yes! See, I want you to feel the pain that you put me through. Bella," She addressed, "Edward hurt me by killing James. So I decided to hurt you as payback, so he can feel the same pain. Only now you can't be hurt physically, so how about emotionally? By removing your daughter."

"Don't you dare!" She screeched, launching herself forward. Edward reacted quickly too, wrapping his arms around Mom and pulling her to his chest, stopping her assault. Victoria's words cut through me. I may be half vampire but we, all of us, had no idea whether that side of me was enough to protect me forever, or if I was just as fragile as a human. I bled the same, so could I die?

"You Cullens are awfully quiet. I thought you were all about family, shouldn't you be reacting more?" Victoria taunted, "Edward, your daughter's life is in my hands and you're just going to stand there and watch? Ooh, I think someone's lost his drive."

I looked at all the Cullen's to assess their reaction to what Victoria said. If they were shocked then they didn't show it. All of them remained poised to attack.

"Shut up!" Mom yelled through clenched teeth.

"Whatever relation Bella has to Nessie shouldn't matter, she's just a human!" Emmett, I think shouted.

"Just a-" Victoria started before stopping herself abruptly. She erupted into laughter, a bell like sound that would be beautiful if not for the woman it came from. She paused for a long time creating an ominous silence before she spoke again, "You really don't know, do you?"

Mom and I stiffened simultaneously, "Bella, have you been keeping secrets?"

Mom sneered, her mouth pulling back to growl.

"This makes it so much better!" Victoria commented, "How could you not know that you'd fathered a child, Edward? _This_ child."

My eyes stared at Edward for the first time. His eyes locked onto Victoria before they snapped to me. What he found as he looked at me confirmed what he could see in Victoria's thoughts, but not my own. If possible, he became paler, but that was the only reaction not wanting to give into Victoria's satisfaction.

"That's impossible; nineteen years ago Edward was a vampire." Carlisle spoke. His voice didn't sound like he was protesting, merely stating a fact as if to gain more information by saying his immediate thoughts out loud.

"Vampire's can't have children!" Rosalie growled from behind.

"No, but human's can," Victoria stated. "I found it unfathomable too when I first heard. Edward didn't strike me as someone to claim a woman's virtue, particularly not a human's."

Victoria grabbed my chin and turned my face towards her sharply. My heart beat was loud and clear as it battered against my ribcage. I was forced to look into her eyes but fear clouded my vision. I felt paralysed. Victoria's eyes studied every aspect of my face. Even though her eyes had left her enemies, she was in control. The knife at my jugular kept everyone unmoving, calculating strategy and accurate timing for a possible attack. "Flushed cheeks, full lips, a strong jaw..." She listed slowly, "bronze curls and the brown eyes of her mother in her father's shape."

Her eyes were bright with excitement, her mouth curling as if she were repressing a smile. Her thumb stroked my chin causing me to lurch my head away from her touch.

"She's the perfect combination of you both, aren't you, _Renesmee_ Swan." She smiled at me then bought her nose to my cheek, breathing in deeply, "Mm, she even smells just like you did, Bella." She turned towards my mom and licked her lips, "I bet she tastes good too."

Mom pulled against Edward, who kept his tight hold on her. Growls rolled off the cliff tops in all directions, "Victoria, let her go! Please, let her go!"

I'd never seen Bella look as helpless as she did right then. Her body slumped in Edward's arms as she pleaded for my life.

Victoria laughed. She laughed. Despite my fear, anger flared. I closed my eyes, concentrating on my breathing, remembering Kachiri's words from all those years ago '_there's vampire in you, Nessie, you just have to embrace it. Let go and just feel'_. As I gave into my other senses, sounds became more prominent as did touch and smell. Concentrating on touch, my other senses drowned, I felt for when Victoria's muscles flexed and contracted.

"_It's sweet how you think begging will change anything."_

"_She's just a child!"_

Just as she went to reply, her muscles relaxed minutely, providing the opportune time for me to escape. I grabbed her wrist containing the knife and twisted out of her grip, delivering a kick to her gut to get her away from me. She stumbled in surprise but it gave me enough time to run.

Unfortunately, my plan didn't include her sidekick. I felt my hair get tugged back sharply, pulling me to the floor. I let out a scream. But he wasn't near me. Before I could pull myself up, Victoria recovered and held me by the hair, the knife now poised horizontally across my throat. I looked over in time to see Jenna on the floor, blood pouring down her face. Barely a second later Riley pounced unable to control his bloodlust, his teeth slicing into her throat causing her to let out a blood curdling scream.

"NO!" I heard myself scream. My shout was repeated by her family, and mine.

Shane broke away, ripping Riley from Jenna sending them both over the cliff edge. I watched as two wolves from the pack, stood on the opposite side jump down to join them.

Dawn ran to Jenna trying to hold her down as the venom began to spread. Jenna's screams sliced through the air as I watched the chaos unfold. Riley's screams of pain and the blunt sounds of tearing flesh travelled up from below, the cliffs acting as an amplifier. Victoria growled in my ear causing me to look at Mom. She was walking forward tentatively, her mouth set in a hard line as she stalked towards her prey.

"Don't come any closer!" Victoria shouted, pushing the knife further into my neck. He voice took on a tone of hysteria as she realised she was now alone.

Edward stepped to my mother's side, "It's over, Victoria!"

"No!" She screeched, getting to her feet, pulling me with her, "It's not over until I say it's over!"

I was completely unprepared for what happened next. Victoria plunge the knife into my throat, slicing it open in one swift movement. My eyes rolled back into my head as I felt the blood leave my next. Barely any sound reached my ears, like noise was being blocked by cotton wool.

I couldn't see; I couldn't hear. I was barely aware of my surroundings. My legs weren't on the ground. I was falling, looking into the sky as I felt the chill of the wind hit my back. Peaceful for a time. Then it stung; an immediate, biting pain that ricocheted off of my back. Water enveloped me, wrapping around my body sucking me into an abyss.

Finally, my vision blurred until it was black, and I could no longer feel anything.

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><p><strong>Sorry, for the delay! April has been a shit month despite it being my birthday half way through.<strong>

**I'm not posting the smileys on this one but if you know them then you're more than welcome to use them. I just want to see if it makes a difference.**

**Remember to follow me on Twitter Jezzyem**

**Love,**

**Jezzy x**


	24. Chapter 24

**:Twilight character names belong to Stephenie Meyer. All characterisations, plot lines, descriptions and additional details belong to the respective author. No copying or reproduction of this work is permitted without personally written authorisation. ©2011 Jezzyem, [03/05/13]. All rights reserved worldwide.**

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><p>Jenna's screaming and the octaves that ripped through the air, combined with Riley's cries as he was shredded didn't deter me from my target. My line of sight was filled with the one image I never wanted to witness. With fire outlining my vision, I stared at Victoria holding a knife to Renesmee's jugular. I could hear her heart pounding fearfully, the pulse from the artery clinking against the tip of the knife, not strong enough to penetrate. Renesmee was horror-struck by what had happened to her best friend: her palms were shaking, a tell tale sign that she needed to calm down.<p>

I stalked forward, my eyes on Victoria, flicking rapidly between her face and her hand, a growl resonating in my chest, threatening to spill out. I couldn't mask my fear. I tried, I truly did, but this was my daughter, my flesh and blood. It was her life hanging in the balance and if there was one life that was the most important in the world, it was hers. Victoria knew that and she was playing on it.

Victoria noticed my approach, halting me with a growl and a glare. She stuck the knife deeper, pushing Ness' heart rate into double time – faster that a foetus'. I stopped, terrified of the building consequences.

"Don't come any closer!" Victoria screeched, the slight shrill of her voice bouncing off of the cliffs like the faint cry of a cat. Her eyes were frantic, impossibly large as she surveyed the congregation behind me, staring down at her. Not that I noticed them. My attention was fixated on my daughter, and despite what Victoria had revealed, it wasn't the forefront of my mind right now regardless of what it may or may not have changed. My main focus was to remove the threat and keep my daughter safe, something that in these past few hours, I'd failed to do. I'd failed as a mother; that thought deflated me.

I felt a presence step to stand by my left, his cold body warming. "It's over, Victoria!"

He was calm, but the sinister side that I found impossible to not fear as a human surfaced and it was the only time I felt protected.

"No!" Victoria screeched, getting to her feet, pulling Renesmee with her. I held back a growl and Edward held back me as I saw Ness wince at the brutality of Victoria's actions "It's not over until I say it's over!"

If time could slow down, it did in that moment, but sadly so did my reflexes and reactions. I watched in horror as Victoria pulled back her lip and bought the knife across Renesmee's throat, painting a perfect red line in her creamed skin.

I saw almost immediately, the pain resonate through Renesmee's body, her eyes glazing and rolling as the knife flung away from her neck, spearing droplets of blood in all directions.

A strangled cry fell from my throat as my mind caught up with what had just occurred. Victoria took my moment of despair to push Renesmee over the side of the cliff face, her body hurtling toward the rocks and water below.

My actions caught up and instead of reacting to the triumphant smile on my enemy's face, I pulled away from Edward and dived over the cliff after my daughter, not caring about the protests or what would happen.

My mind screamed for one thing and that was _her_; Renesmee, Renesmee, Ness, My Ness, Nessie...

My body hit the water, feeling warm as it enveloped me in its trenches. I was too strong for the current, forcing my way into the depths. I frantically looked around, determined not to leave the depths until I found her. I let out the air that was situated in my lungs in the form of a frantic sob. Despite my eyesight, I couldn't see her; I was panicking. The depths of the water were a midnight abyss completely obscuring the raging waves that overtook on the surface.

I swam deeper looking for anything: minute air bubbles, a flash of light against the dark from the pale green shirt she was wearing, paying no attention to the noises that I could still hear above the surface. Being able to hear that but no echoing heartbeat scared me.

Then I smelt it; diluted in the water. Blood, and lots of it. I tried reassuring myself that this process of osmosis made it seem like there was more blood because of the cells bursting, but as I swam deeper, the blood became darker. I kept my mouth closed and my sense of taste and smell shut off.

There she was...resting on the bed of the ocean. She looked peaceful, and so young, save for the trail of blood that still seeped from her neck. The water was causing her hair to flair, pulling the curls into the current and stretching them into a black underwater twister. Graceful –a twisted image. Her eyelashes rested on her cheekbones and her plump lips lay central on her square jaw. She looked asleep, save for the lack of the usual rose tinge her lips held; they were as pale as her face.

I swallowed a cry and gently cradled her. Her body was limp in my arms, the up thrust of the water making her weightless and lifting her muscles. The movement swirled the blood, creating a circle of red mist around us.

I kicked up, pulling us out of the deep; swimming with my legs and using my strength to propel us through the water until it became too shallow to swim.

I broke surface, standing to my height and ran until I reached the shore, not taking my eyes from my daughter's immobile form. Without the interference of water, I could hear clearly. Her heartbeat was faint, extremely faint and slow but she wasn't breathing. Now in the light, she looked ghostly. There was no blood in her cheeks, her skin was cold and her lips had a blue tinge to them. And the blood, the water hadn't made it look worse; it was seeping steadily from her neck, her shirt soaking it up into a black puddle at her chest.

"Bella!"

I couldn't think, my chest felt heavy and I was choking on breath, my throat constricted at the sight that lay before me. My hands flew around her not knowing where to rest for the best. My baby girl-she looked dead.

I had to stop the bleeding. Venom pooled in my mouth but it made me feel sick. I swallowed it back, letting it coat my tongue before I made the decision. I leant over her and licked the slit, sealing in the blood. Pulling back, I licked again to heal the indentation. But that time her body convulsed, her chest rising as if she'd been electrocuted.

Completely distracted in trying to save my daughter, I didn't feel the force that knocked into my side. My body left the ground before being slammed back down into the sand. I growled, bearing my teeth, my initial reaction telling me it was Victoria. I swung my arm, pushing my weight up and flipped myself over, throwing their weight off of me. From my peripheral, I saw a body kneeling by Renesmee and panicked. I ran forward only to be grabbed by my waist and flipped over a shoulder. I steadied myself and spun, a snarl erupting from the base of my throat. Fury pulsed in the veins behind my eyes, until I saw who it was.

Edward stood in front of me, his body poised for fight and his jaw clenched. The wind frayed his copper hair sending the smell of him toward me. I growled and went to move past him but he took hold of my wrists, keeping my stationary.

"Let me go!" I yelled, pulling my arms out of his hold.

"I can't let you, Bella, you'll kill her!" He shouted back getting in my face, forcing my eyes to meet his. His sweet breath overruled my senses but my anger overrode my desire.

Clenching my teeth, I spat, "How dare you insinuate I can't control myself, you don't know me-"

"Your eyes aren't dilated." He commented. It sounded like a question-directed at himself not me- as if he couldn't quite understand what he saw. My eyes weren't dilated because I wasn't hunting. I felt my brow furrow to match his expression. The only difference was that my face was filled with anger and fear; his was merely confusion.

"Of course they're not."

I pulled away from his grasp and pushed past him running back to Renesmee, fast so that he wouldn't stop me again.

Carlisle was with her, checking her over, calling her name trying to evoke a response from her.

I landed hard on my knees, putting myself up by her top half as she lay unmoving. A sob escaped me again and my vision clouded, eyes stinging as venom tried to force itself out as a release of the pressure building in my head from the exertion of emotion.

I jumped and snapped my head to Carlisle, letting a growl fall from my lips, as he ripped open her shirt, "There's too much blood, Bella, and I need to be able to see clearly. Her heartbeat's slowing and she's not breathing. I can't do anything else until her lungs work again. Help me perform CPR?"

I nodded eagerly and skirted around her head to her face waiting for Carlisle's indication, "Are you sure you can handle this? You're still considered young."

I glared at the blonde haired vampire I'd always respected, "She's my daughter. I'd die before I lost control around her."

He started the chest compressions, circling her blood around her body. It was audible. As he completed his thirty compressions, I pinched her nose, wrapped my lips around hers and blew in a deep breath of air, twice.

As Carlisle resumed another round of chest compressions, I looked at my angel. She was so innocent in all of this. She was the result of this mess-the mess that was created in my final human year. None of this was her fault, she didn't ask to be part of it, yet right now she'd been treated the worse. An innocent party treated like cattle. She suffered because of my callous mistake ten years ago when I was stupidly naive to one person-to a whole family in fact.

All around me I could hear the waves, birds screaming, the wind howling. There was a whispering too, overshadowed however by another, more painful noise.

I kissed her forehead, brushing the hair away from her face, praying to whatever God or deity that was real that she survive, that she be okay because I wouldn't know how I'd survive if she didn't live through this.

I didn't realise I was shaking until I was gently pulled away. My eyes refocused and I saw Edward. He was looking at my eyes, his hand cupped my cheek and his mouth was moving.

The whispering-it was him. And then I realised, that the painful noise was me. I was crying, hyperventilating, but the fact that I didn't need oxygen curdled the noise, scratching it against my dry, unnecessary windpipe.

"_She'll be okay, we'll save her...You're okay..." _

His words were muffled, even to my ears like sound passing through a phone with low signal, the crackling cacophony bouncing the real words until they were hardly discernible.

He took my place by Renesmee's head, supplying her with the air she needed to regain breathing individually.

I wasn't perceptive to how much time had passed: nanoseconds, seconds, minutes, hours. I was conscious of the light dimming slowly as it did every day, but nightfall never fell. I was also aware that no one else came to find us.

Whilst my instincts noticed this difference, my eyes, mind and heart remained with one person: the small girl who was being resuscitated by the two men I equally detested, but trusted to save her. As Edward supplied her lungs with air, Carlisle relentlessly pumped her chest to kick-start her heart. My hand went to my mouth to silence my much needed cry. I'd watched this cycle countless amounts of times, waiting for that _one_ exhale, that _one_ compression that would revive her.

My turmoil quickly morphed into a burning anger. A fire that burned throughout my body, igniting the pit of my stomach as if it was hell itself and the devil happily resided there. The flames wrapped my heart like barbed wire, puncturing my long dead organ to allow the blood that still lingered in the tissue to fall and feed my body-the monster.

I wanted her dead. She needed to be. All the others that had remained on that cliff top, should have taken care of her, but at the same time I wanted to kill her myself. Never before had I felt this urge, this unwavering desire to kill someone. If she'd died at the hands of someone else, I wanted to revive her and kill her all over again just so she could feel an ounce of pain that she'd bestowed onto me.

Edward inhaled sharply, snapping me back. I looked over and was at Renesmee's side in an instant, panic surfacing at the possibility that the next words would be the worst I would ever hear.

But then we heard it. The double beat of a heart; followed by a shaky, wisp of an inhale. The cry I'd been holding back fell from my lips as I took her still cold hand. I listened as the air in her lungs curdled and came to the surface full force, expelling the foreign substances in her body. Her head lurched up with the force as she coughed up blood and sea water. My hand shot to the back of her neck to support her head as her body convulsed with the force of her vomiting. She took a few deep breaths before it regulated into a continuous pattern. Her eyes never opened.

I lifted her hand and kissed it before resting it against my cheek, treasuring the fact that she was still alive.

I felt a hand on my shoulder, "Bella?" Carlisle spoke softly, "Bella, we need to move her to the house, she needs monitoring."

I flicked my eyes up to him. She wasn't going back to the Cullens'; she was coming home with me.

Clearly seeing the stubbornness in my eyes, he explained, "Her body temperature is far too low for a human, I need to check her over so she doesn't get sick."

"She isn't _just_ human." I protested.

A small smile of compassion appeared on his face, his eyes full of worry, "I'm aware of that. But she is clearly still as vulnerable as one, and as of now, I need to treat her like I would any other patient and make sure she is fully recovered before I can let her out of my care."

He was only doing what was best for her welfare and health and I had to respect that. I nodded and kissed the palm of Renesmee's hand, then placed it across her torso. Carlisle immediately scooped her up and cradled her against his chest and ran in the direction of the house. My breath faltered as he lifted her; her body slumping against him flaccidly as if she were nothing more than a well-worn dolly.

I felt Edward take hold of my right hand as he came to my side, giving it a gentle squeeze. I looked at him -I really looked at him for the first time. His face was a mirage of emotion, his eyes flicking wildly around my own. He swallowed, and then tugged on my hand, not letting his eyes leave my face. It was all he needed to do. He was comforting me without being overbearing and allowing me to maintain my distance from him - both physically and emotionally -to an extent. He tugged again and took a step in the direction I so desperately wanted to follow.

I took off, Edward by my side, my hand secure in his, tracing the path that was tainted with Carlisle's scent. We didn't speak. The only thing that we could hear were the light sound of our steps as we ran in unison. The same sounds that I'd heard approaching the house a few hours ago were the same; birds, the stream, the heartbeat. The heartbeat that was no way near as prominent as it was.

Inside the house, murmurs came from the lowest floor, all voices I easily recognised. Carlisle flittered about on the second, moving medical equipment no doubt. Running up the porch I let go of Edward's hand and headed to the stairs. Our approach was expected, either that or the audience lining the foyer to the staircase had heard the commotion when Carlisle entered the house less than a minute ago. I ignored their burning gazes and ran into the room next to Carlisle's office.

The low fuzz of machinery appeared louder than I'd ever heard it, especially with the repetitive beep reverberating through the white room, monitoring her heartbeat. Carlisle had placed Renesmee on a white bed and had already connected her to the monitor and was currently attaching her to an IV drip.

I walked to her other side and took her hand. Her top was still ripped open revealing her bra and pale skin; blood still stained her skin and the delicate white lace. Looking closer I noticed hundreds of goose pimples littered her skin; every surface possible. Through the lace, her nipples were prominent in response to the cold. A blue hue could be seen at her hands, nose and lips. And she was shivering, violently.

I cleared my throat, "Carlisle, what's wrong with her?"

Still intent in injecting chemicals and medicines into her IV, I would have suspected he was ignoring me if it weren't for the quick reply, "It's winter, the water temperature was below 50 - low enough to kill a human," I couldn't contain my gasp of shock. I didn't pay attention to the footsteps that advanced, "She was in the cold too long while we tried to resuscitate her. An estimated guess is that she's developed moderate hypothermia."

"How estimated is that guess?" I asked sharply - far more sharp than I'd intended.

He stopped his movements; his eyes met mine, "I'm fairly certain."

I nodded in understanding and resignation. It was hypothermia; he just couldn't confirm it without written proof. He continued, "It's not life threatening yet because her organs are still functioning-"

"What do you mean '_yet'_?" I hissed, not caring about manners or dignity or professionalism. He was implying my worst fear, "She can't die, she's immortal!"

"You don't know that for certain, Bella. You saw what happened a minute ago," His voice was soothing – doctoral, "I told you I was treating her as I would a human patient."

Silence passed between us, neither one of us breaking gaze until the tension subdued. A movement from the doorway caught my eye. I turned and saw the Cullens at the threshold. Not all of them were visible, but I knew they were all witnessing this.

"What did you mean by '_yet_'?" I asked in a voice so small that a human wouldn't have heard.

"Our priority now is to warm her up so that her vital organs don't fail. When body temperature drops severely, blood surrounds the vital organs to keep them warm - that's why her hands and lips are coldest. However, she lost a lot of blood, meaning that her organs might not have enough blood to keep them at the required body temperature, and I can't give her a transfusion because her blood is completely different to a human's." He explained, "Her temperature needs to return to normal and the nutrients need to re enter her body so that she can re develop the blood she lost. I can't judge which needs to be prioritised, but we're running out of time."

I nodded then turned to the door and someone stepped forward. I turned and saw Esme stood just forward of everyone else, holding some folded blankets and clothing in her arms, a look of compassion - or pity - and worry on her beautiful face. "I bought some clothes for her to change into, and some blankets, I thought they'd help." She hesitated, not certain of my reaction, "I also bought some spare for you too, Bella, you can't be comfortable."

Her eyes flickered down my body and back up again before a small smile spread across her face in a friendly gesture. I followed her gaze and noticed my own clothes heavy with water, droplets falling and pooling around my feet. I forgot that I too had been in the water, except the plunge didn't affect my life.

I nodded in thanks before I asked, "Where's Jacob?"

Her eyebrows furrowed, so I asked again.

"As soon as it happened"-indicating to a comatose Renesmee- "Victoria took off. Jacob led both packs after her-"

"Someone find him, he needs to be here. He can help." I ordered. Small footsteps ran out the door at my words, closely followed by another set–Alice presumably, along with Jasper.

"That _dog_ is not coming in this house." Rosalie hissed.

I growled at her and narrowed my eyes, "If you don't want to see him then leave. This is about what's best for my daughter-"

"And Edward's too, apparently!" She spat.

"ENOUGH!" Carlisle yelled...for the first time ever. His eyes were blazing, a molten gold, "We don't have time for this! We all have questions, yes, but right now, this is not helping a dying girl." I whimpered at his words, "Everybody leave! "

He directed the order at the door so I knew he didn't mean me. Esme quickly came forward and deposited the load she carried at the foot of the bed. She gave me another look before she walked out the door, pulling a scowling Rosalie with her to the floor below.

"I'm staying." Edward remarked, crossing his arms as he entered the room.

Carlisle began to protest, as did I, but he stood firm, closing the door behind his and repeating, "I'm staying."

I turned away and set to work, ripping the rest of her tattered shirt off. Carlisle disconnected the IV so that I could remove her bra and re-dress her in the baggy white t-shirt Esme had supplied, swiftly. He reattached the IV as I ripped off her jeans. Edward came forward then and draped a folded blanket over the top half of her body, shielding the rest of her from his and Carlisle's view as I tore at her wet underwear and pulled on a pair of thick sweatpants. I pulled the blanket over her completely and tucked her in as if she was two years old again. I pulled her wet hair from underneath her and began to pat it dry with a towel.

"Bella, do you know her normal body temperature? I suspect it isn't the same as a regular human." Carlisle asked and he took her axillary temperature.

I answered without hesitation, "Ninety-four."

Then we heard a commotion downstairs. Edward moved toward the door and wretched it open before Jake appeared in the doorway. As usual, he was just wearing a pair of cut-off jeans, his torso and bare feet on display. Except, his eyes were wild and full of pain, his hair stood is disarray and the after math of his phase still lingered in his body: his palms shaking, his chest muscles flexing and his jaw tensed.

His eyes darted around the room before they landed on Renesmee- _his Nessie_- and his entire body deflated. His pained expression matched mine as he found my gaze. I could see myself clearly in his shining, black eyes: wet, haggard, utterly broken.

"She's too cold, Jake, she needs to be warmed." I whispered; the agony evident in my voice.

Understanding filled his features before he strode forward and came to my side of the bed. I took a step back, allowing him enough room to pull back the blankets and climb onto the bed with her. He wrapped his body around Renesmee's; his arms pulled her against his torso until he was flush against her from head to toe. He gently tilted her head with his hand, letting her face rest in the crook of his warm neck. He hissed minutely as his bare skin touched her frozen body, completely dwarfing her.

I looked up at Carlisle, a smile playing on his face. The look in his eyes conveyed everything: he understood what Jake was doing and wasn't protesting, he'd done what he could for now, he had faith. I looked over at Edward and saw a scowl on his face as he fixed his gaze on the two forms on the bed. Next to him was the doorway and in it stood Alice. Her arms were folded over her chest and a frown sat somewhat elegantly on her petite face.

"Bella, why don't you get changed and meet us downstairs?" She suggested, "I think we all need some answers."

I hesitated, looking at everyone in the room, my eyes settling on Ness before looking back at Alice.

"She'll be fine." Alice stated with conviction. Carlisle nodded in agreement before he walked to the door.

I whispered to Jake that I would be downstairs if he needed me but he didn't appear to be listening, his priority and focus remaining with Renesmee.

I nodded my consent to Alice and she flittered down the stairs, closely followed by Carlisle. Edward hesitated, unsure of what to do or if he should approach me.

"You can use my room to get changed if you'd like." He offered, pointing his thumb over his shoulder to where his bedroom was situated across the hall from Carlisle's office. I knew where it was.

"Thank you." I replied then moved past him, taking a final glance over my shoulder before stepping through the door to his bedroom.

Everything was the same, a shock to the system actually: the floor to ceiling windows, the music collection, the black couch, the white rug on the floor...if I were human still, I'd be blushing as I looked at that final unchanged item. Shaking my head out of memory lane, I changed out of my wet clothes into dry ones and prepared to face the music.

I stepped out the room, descending the stairs at human pace before I stepped into the living room. The members of the Cullen coven were stood solitary, much like they were before, except this time it was only me that stood as offence.

My eyes passed over each and every one of them before settling on Edward, the person who seemed the most distracted - avoiding my gaze. His arms were folded, his top hand rubbing at his jaw.

I hung my head and sighed, "You said you had questions, so..."

Edward was the first to speak, a deep, sorrow filled sigh giving him away, "Is what she said true Bella? What Victoria said, I need to hear it from you."

My eyes met his and of all the emotions on his face, I couldn't extract one that was identifiable. He spoke slower, using his hand for emphasis. "Please, I need to hear it from you...is she...?"

I nodded, straightening my shoulders before looking directly at him, "Yes, she's..." _How do I put this?_ "Biologically..." _Is that right?_ "Renesmee is our daughter."

That was it. Simple and honest. It was the first time I'd spoken it out loud.

"_She's our daughter."_

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><p><strong>I ask two things of my readers: Pretty please review and follow me on twitter Jezzyem, or at least have a look at the fandom on twitter. It's full of recs and competition alerts and stuff that are controlled by the readers of fanfiction.<strong>

**Again I'm not going to post the smileys but if you want to use them then you're more than welcome. I've found that most people are using words.**

**Love always,**

**Jezzy x**


	25. Chapter 25

**Twilight character names belong to Stephenie Meyer. All characterisations, plot lines, descriptions and additional details belong to the respective author. No copying or reproduction of this work is permitted without personally written authorisation. ©2011 Jezzyem, [01/03/15]. All rights reserved worldwide.**

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><p><span>BPOV<span>

_"She's our daughter._" My admission silenced the room.

I looked around at everyone; accessing their reactions. Each of them was unreadable, except Rosalie who huffed and glared.

I glanced and looked away, putting my shield up for precaution. As I did, I felt my body change and a pressure against my shield. My eyes snapped in the direction and I saw Jasper looking at me intently; a small line appeared between his brows.

I raised my own in a silent question at his audacity. His mouth twitched in apology; his eyes flicked to his right. I followed and saw Edward looking at him, before he turned to me – Jasper, no doubt telling him what had happened.

It was Rosalie who snapped first, "That's it?" She yelled, throwing her arms out for emphasis, "That's all you are going to say?"

I folded my arms across my chest, "What is it that you want to know, Rosalie?"

I didn't care for pleasantries; I didn't owe these people anything. They needed an explanation, yes, but they didn't deserve my kindness.

"Let's start with 'how'?" She spat, bitterly.

I bristled and attacked back sarcastically, "How do you _think_ babies are made?!"

I was not going to let her bully me into thinking that Renesmee was a bad outcome. I didn't feel guilty about having her, or being a vampire, and I certainly was not going to regret having her.

I heard Edward growl and turned to glare, thinking he was growling at my attack on Rosalie. Instead he was scowling at Emmett, who was smirking right back at Edward. Clearly, he'd directed an inappropriate thought at Edward.

"I don't think that was what she meant." Esme commented from her spot next to Carlisle.

I knew that, of course I did, but Rosalie was pissing me off. Even if I did understand why she asked that question. Rosalie wanted kids more than anything; Edward had told me that. All she wanted was hope that it was possible.

But she didn't need to make me the enemy.

I sighed and moved to the couch and sat down. Standing up was too offensive; this was not a battle or a confession, so why were we all on edge?

Alice followed my lead first and sat on the opposite end of the white couch. Esme followed and sat beside Alice; Carlisle sat on the arm of it and rested his hands on his lap. Jasper came and sat on Alice's other side whilst Edward, Rosalie and Emmet remained standing despite the room left on the U-shaped couch.

"I was human," I began hesitantly, "...when I gave birth, not a vampire."

"We know that already!" Rosalie snapped.

I snarled, "If you yell at me one more time, Rosalie, I will refuse to tell you anything."

"Rose, shut up." Edward added without looking at her.

"She kept your child from you, from all of us – her _family_ and you're telling _me_ to shut up!"

I stood, "You are not her family! You are nothing to her!"

My anger was already piqued thanks to the events of today – a triad of emotions assaulted my body and she was adding more fuel to the flame with her verbal attack. This would not end pretty if she continued.

Esme spoke firmly, shocking me, "Rosalie, please leave the room."

"Excuse me?" Rosalie's eyes snapped to her adoptive mother.

"If you can't control your thoughts and emotions long enough to hear Bella's story, then leave. You are not helping anyone." Carlisle sided with Esme.

Rosalie looked around the room and shot me a final glare before she went to stand by the windows. She didn't leave the room, just the conversation.

A heavy silence fell again, the Cullens looking at me sceptically. Despite my current hate for Rosalie, at least she dared to ask the questions that were on her mind.

"Look, if you aren't willing to ask questions, then I am going upstairs to sit with my daughter – you're wasting my time." I huffed.

Alice spoke first, "How old is she?"

Regardless of the question, I still couldn't relax, I wouldn't relax. The circumstance I found myself in was different to how I had imagined it being. I was here for this sole purpose, but look at how it had turned out. But I answered anyway, "She was nine a couple of months ago."

"But she looks nineteen..."

"Everything has been accelerated from the beginning: the pregnancy, her appearance, her mind and her growth. Two years ago everything slowed down, but didn't stop. We expect that to happen in a year." Talking about this helped; it distracted a part of my mind away from my ailing daughter.

"How do you know that?" Carlisle asked. As much as he was concerned, I knew he was fascinated by Ness now that he knew what she was.

"Justin – Dawn's son – is also a hybrid. He's older than Renesmee and he was ten when he stopped changing." I told him.

"From what Victoria said, it was James that fathered him, is that right?" Jasper asked.

I nodded in answer as my mind became occupied. I remembered what happened before Victoria attacked Renesmee and my chest clenched, "Is Jenna alright? Where are they?"

Alice moved next to me and rested her hand on my shoulder. I flinched involuntarily and ignored her defeated look at my reaction to her, "Once Dawn's friend had finished with the newborn, he picked Jenna up and they went somewhere; we don't know where though, they just left."

I nodded in understanding. Dawn's priority was with her daughter, and I more than anyone could attest to that feeling. I just hoped that Jenna would be okay as well as Renesmee.

"Bella," Carlisle called, "You said that your pregnancy was accelerated," He awaited my confirmation before he continued with his question, "How long did your gestation last?"

"Approximately five weeks." I answered bluntly.

Carlisle's eyes widened as Esme gasped. I could see Carlisle calculating in his mind how the baby adapted that quickly and at what crucial points.

Esme on the other hand, tried to ask a question. She stopped herself continuously though; trying to figure out the how to structure the sentence she wanted to ask.

I could comprehend what it was she wanted to know, so I made it simpler for her, "I looked six months pregnant after three weeks."

I heard Edward take a shaky inhale; his emotions were getting the better of him. His eyes were closed and he was pinching the bridge of his nose.

Without opening his eyes he asked, "When did you find out?"

I paused before answering. When he showed no signs of looking at me, I answered, "A week after you left I started being sick. At first I pinned it on stress and not looking after myself properly after-"

I stopped myself and screwed my eyes shut to prevent the onslaught of memories. Talking about what happened only made it worse, which is why I never admitted the truth to Renesmee until recently.

I took a deep breath before I concluded, "I took a test a few days later after I felt her first move. I gave birth three weeks later."

A wolf howl ripped through the silence from somewhere outside. I prayed it was a sign that they had caught Victoria.

"What did you do once you had found out?" Esme asked.

My face turned to stone and I felt my body tense. Esme's question reminded me just how much they'd let me down. How much they had abandoned me without any consideration for my feelings.

"I came here." I told them in a dead voice. They picked up on my change of tone and tensed – all of them uncertain of what I would do next. "I came here hoping that you had left me something that would help me find you. But there was nothing to find. I was completely alone, and scared. I knew that the baby inside me was different, and the only person I could have trusted to help me and give me answers had gone," I looked directly at Carlisle. His head lowered in shame, "along with everyone else I had counted on to support me through it. Instead I sat in this house and cried myself to sleep. Jacob found me like that"

A lump had built in my throat. The memories were too powerful and I wished constantly that they would fade, but they never did. Instead they plagued me, my only comfort being that they gave me the best outcome – a beautiful daughter and a lifetime with her.

A daughter who's life had been jeopardised because of me. A sob escaped me before I could catch it. I flung my hand to cover it before another escaped.

Alice moved again to comfort me but I stopped her with a sharp 'don't' and shifted myself so I was seated on the edge of the couch, my body shaking.

Esme asked the next question: "What happened after Jacob found you?"

I looked up at Esme, thankful that her question changed the subject.

"He hated it at first, but when he saw how scared I was of being alone he stayed. It was Jake who eventually figured out what the baby wanted," I told them, "_It's a bloodsucker after all, Bells_". My attempt at Jacob's voice failed miserably but it got the message across.

Esme was wide eyed, "You drank blood?"

"Animal blood." I confirmed, "Anything Jake could get his hands on during a hunt and bring back."

Carlisle asked for elaboration, "What was wrong with human food?"

"The baby rejected it."

Esme nodded accepting my answer. Another thought came to her, "Was it only Jake who was with you the entire time?"

I shook my head, "No, it wasn't just Jake. Charlie knew too and the rest of the pack."

"You told Charlie?" Rosalie asked from across the room. Clearly she felt it was okay to intervene again.

I sighed knowing there was no point in hiding the truth from them, but my voice still came out filled with resentment towards her, "Charlie was there because I asked him to be. The blood made me stronger but it also made the baby stronger. There was a high chance I wasn't going to survive. The pack knew from Jake because their thoughts are connected. If I died then they would have blamed the baby and killed it. They didn't exactly hide their disgust-."

Rosalie scoffed. Assuming it was aimed at me I growled. That was until she spoke, "They wanted to kill an unborn child!"

"They didn't see it that way. Vampires are their enemy and I was infected with one in his eyes. He watched as I came closer to death each day because the baby wouldn't let me eat. Of course he wanted to kill it!"

I closed my eyes and forced myself to control my emotions. One, I couldn't show them weakness – I wouldn't. Two, I wanted to forget. That time with Jake was intense; I feared for my unborn child, praying that Jake in the end would not go through with his plan. But I had no one else to turn to, so I had to rely on him.

I schooled my features and returned to answering Esme's previous question, "I managed to convince them to wait until the baby was born because if they tried to do anything while I was pregnant, they would be the ones to blame for my death. I asked Jake to tell Charlie because I wanted to say goodbye."

"What did he tell him?" Alice asked.

"He phased first, and then took him to Billy so he could explain their history." I replied; an edge to my voice still.

"We weren't painted in the best light then, I presume." Alice commented.

I didn't reply. They didn't deserve any praise – not then and not now.

"Charlie came to me and, like any parent whose teenage daughter was pregnant, told me how stupid I was. He already knew what was happening but he asked me to explain anyway. He asked me why I wouldn't just get rid of the baby but it was too late for that. There was no way to get the baby out without killing me. So, I asked for his help. I made him promise that he would take care of the baby once it was born. He understood my side; the baby was half human so there was a chance the baby could be raised that way. Charlie agreed because although he didn't like it, he knew that if I died then the baby would be the only part of me left."

There was silence for a time; everyone letting the information sink in as I relayed my memories. They were blurred now but far more prominent than others. I refused to allow myself to forget my pregnancy. Despite the heartbreak it was still a fond memory – to an extent.

"Bella," Carlisle asked, "What happened during labour?"

My face must have changed as everyone's expressions darkened.

I hesitated but answered what I could, "Victoria was around; it was the first time she'd come back so everyone was tense. I was scared and the stress alerted the baby. My spine snapped and then there was a pain in my stomach. That's all I can remember."

Carlisle's face changed as he imagined the outcome, "That's all you remember?"

"I blacked out."I confirmed bluntly, "When I came to, I was a vampire."

"Who changed you?" Edward asked. I knew the look on his face. It was remorse. The one thing he did not want was for me to become like him. What he didn't realise what that it was all on him.

"Nobody changed me-"

"Don't lie! Venom is the only thing that can change a human!" Rosalie just couldn't keep quiet.

"I didn't say that venom didn't change me; I said no vampire did!" I stood up now, fed up with the attack. "I wasn't bitten!" I spat at her.

"Where did the venom come from?" Edward asked impatiently.

I stared right at him, "You."

Commotion broke out as everyone spoke of their disbelief and expressed their opinions. I had questions slung at me from all directions. The change of noise was deafening and it made me angrier.

"Will you let me finish?" I shouted rhetorically.

The conversation stopped, "I didn't get the venom from Edward, but it was his."

"How?" Carlisle asked dumbfounded.

"We used my amniotic fluid." I answered.

"Who's 'we'?"

"Charlie and me." I said, "He came to me with the idea. At first he wanted to get the baby to bite me but we wouldn't know how responsive she would be or how long I would be awake until she could, so the fluid was a backup plan. He explained that he'd rather have me live forever as something else than die at any moment as a human. There was no guarantee that it would work but it meant that Charlie had at least tried everything to help me survive, and that if I did die then he wouldn't blame himself. Turns out it worked."

"How did he get it?"

"He extracted it with a needle – which wasn't easy - and then when it came to it, he injected it into my heart and used chest compressions to circulate it."

More silence.

Carlisle was the only one to eventually respond, and made the observation that meant I had to share the one thing I didn't want to tell them about, "Bella, if the venom was mixed into the amniotic fluid then it wasn't pure..."

He drifted off; the silent question hanging in the air.

I attempted to delay, "My change wasn't normal. At least I don't think it was based on what I knew from you."

The delay didn't work. Carlisle asked the question: "How long did it take?"

The way he asked made it seem like he already knew, or had somewhat of an idea.

I sighed, "Five days."

Edward's breath stuttered as he exhaled. Disbelief filled the room, everyone looking to and fro. They remember the pain of a change. So did I. I wasn't going to elaborate further.

A throat cleared behind me. I turned and saw Jake at the bottom of the stairs; a scowl on his face.

"Her breathing has changed, Doc." He told Carlisle.

Carlisle dismissed himself quickly and disappeared up the stairs. I stood to follow; I'd answered enough questions. Jake's hand snapped out and grabbed my arm stopping me.

"Seth has news." He explained, eyeing the front door of the Cullen's house.

I turned too, hoping the news Seth bought was _good_ news.

A second later he was at the door in his human form, ripped jeans hanging low on his hips, his feet were bare and his hair was a mess. He was breathing heavily but showed no sign of discomfort at being in enemy territory.

"Seth?" I said as I walked towards him. His hands were shaking still, normally a reaction to his phase. Something in his expression told me that it was a subdued anger that was causing the bodily reactions though.

I took hold of his hand and it slowly stopped shaking. I heard the Cullen's stand behind me having seen their new guest.

"Seth, did you get her?" I pleaded.

He looked at me and his face filled with sorrow. I knew my answer. She'd managed to evade them once again.

He looked at Jake, his eyes full of apology for not being able to please his alpha. He looked over my head at the Cullens before he realised they weren't going anywhere. He turned back to Jake and cleared his throat "Leah, Embry and Quil are patrolling the house. Sam took his pack back to base to strategize."

Jacob nodded but didn't say anything.

"Seth," I asked, "Can you go and tell Charlie what has happened, please? He'd want to be here to see Ness."

Seth looked at Jake for confirmation before he nodded and exited the door.

I turned back to Jake and took his hand in mine to calm him. He pulled me into a hug and I sighed into his chest, both of us comforting the other from our mutual torment.

"What is up with you two?" Emmett mumbled. Despite having good hearing, he was quiet enough that were barely heard him...but we did.

I broke away from Jacob but didn't realise his hand. I glared directly at Emmett, "We have a common priority. And at the moment you're keeping us from her."

Emmett looked at us the raised his hands for a second as a sign of surrender then folded them across his chest.

"Does he really have to be here?" Rosalie sniped.

Jake bristled, "I have more right to be here than you, Blondie."

"You're not family!"

"He's my family, Rosalie!" I cried.

I felt Jake's hand shake in mine. I held it tighter hoping it would help him. I heard his breathing deepen. I knew he was counting to ten.

When he opened his eyes, they were on fire – pure hatred. I squeezed his hand both as a warning and also as a sign of comfort. It wouldn't take much to overload him right now: the knowledge that Renesmee could be dying and we were stuck with the very people he hates the most, plus the fact Nessie's attacker hadn't been caught. His emotions were running wild, I could see it and feel it in the tiny tremors that rippled through his body and ended at his arm.

I decided then to put ourselves first; I'd told the Cullen's enough and now I wanted to return to my daughter's bedside.

"Jake, come on, Ness needs us, I don't want to leave her alone."

He didn't look at me when he replied, "You go ahead, Bells, I'll be up in a second."

I followed his eye line and saw he was looking directly at Edward.

I tugged on his arm to get his attention. He looked at me and smiled slightly but it looked more like a grimace. There wasn't much to smile about at the moment, "I promise I won't be long."

"Don't do anything stupid." I warned. Jake was looking for a fight. Normally, I would have stopped him but Jake's main flaw was his stubbornness, and I didn't have time to stand and argue with him about doing something rash when Renesmee was upstairs fighting for her life.

So I left him there, walking up the stairs to the only innocent member of this entire commotion who was currently baring the scars of the explosive aftermath.

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><p><strong>I'm back! This chapter has a lot of dialogue, but that's the way it had to be!<strong>

**A quick thank you to my new readers I happen to have accumulated in my absence (*waves*)**

**I plan to update monthly so I can get back in the habit of posting. If it's any longer then I apologise profusely.**

**The quick review system can be found in a previous chapter if you wish to use it.**

**Happy reviewing!**

**love Jezzy xx**


	26. Chapter 26

**So given that I have been away for a while, one of my readers suggested I offer a quick summary on what has happened:**

**Renesmee leaves home to go to college, while she's there she meets a girl called Jenna who's mum in a vampire and has a half-vampire brother. She also meets Alice and Edward but doesn't know they are related. They don't know she's a hybrid. One weekend Bella and Charlie come to visit and they see the Cullens. Bella and Charlie flee but ask Nessie to read a book that Bella had given her telling her about who her father is. She begins to ignore the Cullen's but Edward confronts her when he hears her playing Bella's lullaby. Bella intervenes so they know she is alive. They try and talk to her but don't get anywhere. Three days after Christmas everyone goes to the Cullens so Bella can tell them who Nessie is to them. Nessie gets upset so leaves and Jenna follows. They are ambushed by Victoria who reveals that Ness is his daughter. Jenna gets bitten and Victoria slits Nessie's throat and pushes her over a cliff. Bella dives in after her and Edward and Carlisle meet her down at the beach. They take her back to the house and Carlisle diagnoses her with hypothermia. Bella admits that Nessie is Edward's biological daughter.**

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><p>As I made my way towards the room, I heard Renesmee's heartbeat, both on the monitors and from her chest. It was still weak.<p>

The door was left open.

As I walked in my heart clenched at the sight of Renesmee; so small on the bed. Her hair was cascaded beautifully over the pillow. The scar on her neck glistened pink as the venom I used to close the wound worked with her blood to fix it.

Carlisle stood by her bed looking at a thermometer and comparing it to his previous notes.

"Her temperature is rising slowly which is a good sign, but it's still in critical numbers." He informed me. He glanced up and offered me a reassuring smile.

I gave a small smile back in appreciation. He might not have been there for me during my plight but I was so thankful he was here for Renesmee now. I couldn't have taken her to a normal hospital; there were no medical records for her and her blood work was likely to be completely different to a regular human's.

I proceeded into the room and sat by her head admiring her face. It was cherub like; she looked so innocent. To everyone she looked nineteen but in reality she was still a baby; when she slept it was still obvious. I reached out my hand and stroked her cheek with my finger. I used to do this to her as a child when she told me she wasn't tired. I sat by her and stroked it until she relaxed enough to sleep; it calmed her nightmares at night; it comforted her when she'd been crying.

But now there was no reaction. Not even a subconscious tilt toward the source. She was completely unresponsive. Refusing to believe it, I took her cold palm in my own icy grasp and waited. And waited.

Nothing. She wasn't dreaming or thinking. Her mind was void of anything. I choked. Her mind was usually full of thoughts, rapidly overlapping one another – I'd never seen anything like it. I used to tease her fondly for her fantasyland and life questions. I'd give anything to have that intricate craziness dashing across my own mind right now.

I bought my head closer and kissed her hand before leaning it against our closed grasp. I wouldn't let go; not when her mind would be the first indication that she was getting better. As soon as it switched on, I wanted to know.

"Isabella?" Carlisle asked in a voice so quiet it soothed me. I looked up and saw that he was at Renesmee's other side gazing at her face, "What was she like when she was first born?"

I smiled as I recounted facts about her growing up: how she liked chasing butterflies, used to ride on Jacob's back like a horse, loved her hair being brushed, went fishing with Charlie and how she refused to use a rod instead of her hands to catch them. It used to give Charlie a near heart attack when she leaned too far over the edge.

I wasn't sure what his true intention was from asking the question; either to know her a little more or to take my mind off of the bad. For whatever reason, I was grateful. I didn't mind sharing this part of our history.

"She likes to draw; her pictures are amazing and so true to form it's incredible. I used to take her to the highest hill in Olympia reserve and look at the stars. She used to draw pictures and make up stories about each of them. I blame Zafrina for her imagination." I added subconsciously.

"Zafrina?" Carlisle questioned.

I rested Renesmee's palm against my cheek. "Yes. Her and her coven came two years after you'd been gone looking for you. I was the only vampire in Forks so they located me to ask where you all were. They sort of became my mentors. I told him quietly.

"In what way were they mentors?" Had Carlisle actually been blood related to Edward, I would have assumed this was where Renesmee's curiosity came from.

"They taught Ness and I how to use our powers, and how to fight strategically. They even gave a few tips to Jake about a vampire's weakness so long as he promised they would never get attacked if they visited." I smiled at the memory. It was good to reminisce.

"I guessed that you had a power; I wasn't aware that Renesmee had one too." He commented. It wasn't exactly a question but I was aware of the one hidden beneath his words.

"I'm sure she'll show you when she wakes up." I promised.

Carlisle nodded and took her other hand in his.

A stab of guilt washed through me at that moment. This family loved Renesmee already. She was a granddaughter in Carlisle's eyes and I knew Esme saw her as that too. I had no reason to feel guilty, I knew that. They were impossible to find and inform. But what if I'd have looked harder? Searched longer?

I shook away those thoughts. They were the ones that chose to leave. They were here now, and that is what mattered. If Renesmee wanted a relationship with them then I wouldn't stop her. But they couldn't expect the same from me.

"Bella," Carlisle hesitated minutely before her continued, "Forgive me for asking, but when were you and Edward intimate?"

If I were human still I would be blushing right now, "I assume you know that Edward used to sneak in my room at night?"

Carlisle nodded his confirmation.

"He came in as usual the night before my birthday. Well, technically it was my birthday when he came in. He said he would give me anything I wanted. I made him promise that he couldn't deny me what I asked for and he did. Edward's a man of his word so he agreed not realising what it was that I wanted. He couldn't back out after I'd asked." I wasn't going to go into details. He was, after all, Edward's father.

The conversation lulled into silence after that; both of us content just watching Renesmee.

The silence didn't last very long though. Chaos broke out downstairs calling both of our attention. A glance at the clock told me it had only been four minutes since I'd returned upstairs. I battled with myself on whether to go or stay, but when I heard Edward grunt in pain I didn't hesitate.

Running down the stairs – Carlisle at my heels – I saw Edward crippled in what looked like pure agony; his face contorted in a way I'd never seen before. His eyes were so sad.

"Edward?" Alice cried in concern.

He was looking at Jacob who sat reclined on the sofa with a gleam on his face.

Nobody moved. No one had struck out. Edward's pain wasn't physical, it was mental.

I realised what Jacob was doing. My anger piqued at his audacity. Yes, the Cullen's deserved some form of punishment for what they did, but not like this. I hadn't become completely heartless towards them. So I threw my shield over Jake effectively breaking the connection. Edward immediately relaxed. He closed his eyes. When he opened them the pain was still there, only he was looking at me.

When Edward relaxed, Jacob's head snapped towards the stairs where I was standing; a scowl on my face.

As Jacob's head turned, so did everyone else's bar Carlisle's who instead was asking after Edward.

My eyes still on Jacob, I hissed, "We're not here for this, Jacob!"

Jacob's eyes flashed with remorse. He knew he had upset me because of my use of his full name. It was rare that I used anything other than 'Jake' to refer to him. He huffed and stood up ignoring the prominent glares being shot at his back, and came to join me in returning to Ness.

Jasper halted us by asking, "How do you do that, Bella?"

"I have a shield." That's all they were getting at this point; I'd told them what they needed to know.

I turned to walk up the stairs but was stopped again. This time it was Edward:

"Bella, I...I'm so sorry, I-" He sounded so wounded and broken.

It was clear what Jacob had shown him. Jake was with me at my worst time and had to witness my devastating heartbreak. Of course, he would use that to torture Edward. But I couldn't listen to his apology. It held no standing. He had made it very clear the day he left. He'd used me. He'd made me fall in love with him and then dropped me just as quickly. I would not give him the satisfaction of listening to any other explanation.

"I don't want to hear it." I spoke with determination, "The damage is done so there's no point in apologising. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to return to my daughter."

I ran up the stairs and resumed my position next to my little girl, holding her hand.

-o0o-

Jake and I sat at Renesmee's bedside for three hours before we moved. Jake still insisted on trying to warm her up. Carlisle said it was working. I ignored whoever came into the room, and they all did at some point. I focused solely on my daughter and any change in her that might occur. They understood. At least, I think they did considering no one tried to talk to me. The only person that did was Carlisle to give me an update on Ness' condition. She hadn't changed.

The only time I moved was when I heard a car turning onto the Cullen's driveway in the distance. The skid of the tyres and the grumble of the engine told me it was the police cruiser.

My dad.

I didn't move from Renesmee though until I heard him walk up the porch. I heard Carlisle greet him at the door, to which my dad huffed. I bit my lip to repress the slight smirk. Charlie wasn't scared; even if he knew how quick a vampire could kill him.

At human pace, I ran into his arms. A faint 'Bells' left his lips in a whisper as he held me. Despite being a vampire, I was still a head shorter than him. His hot-blooded skin gave me warmth and it was the comfort I needed. His scent washed over me and I felt at peace.

I heard gasps from behind me as I did but chose to ignore them.

I released my dad and saw tears swimming in his eyes. He sniffed and cleared his throat to compose himself before asking after his granddaughter, "How is she?"

I answered truthfully, "She's not doing great but she hasn't deteriorated. Come on, I'll take you upstairs."

We ignored the Cullens as we passed.

Charlie moved swiftly over to Renesmee looking her over for any kind of damage. Other than the scorched pink slash of skin across her neck she looked exactly the same as she did this morning.

Charlie touched his hand to her forehead and commented on how cold she was, to which Jake replied, "I'm on it, Chief", before climbing on the bed again and moulding himself around her. Charlie stroked her hair then placed a lingering kiss to her forehead. He didn't get a response. He sat in the space I occupied earlier and took her hand. He eyed it for a second and then sighed. He didn't get a mind full of subconscious imagination either.

I took the seat on the other side of the bed. Jake's body blocked my view of her but she needed the warmth and Charlie needed this time with her.

"I forget sometimes how beautiful she is." Charlie commented, "I remember holding her for the first time and thinking she was the most beautiful baby I'd ever laid eyes on. Of course, I was a little biased but I honestly have never seen a prettier little girl...except you, Bells."

He looked at me for a second with a fond smile gracing his face before returning his gaze to Renesmee.

"I bet your mom would have thought so too." He added.

It had been a while since Charlie had spoken about Renee. It was hard for both of us when she passed particularly knowing I hadn't seen her in nearly a year. Keeping Renesmee a secret was the worst part and a lot of our communication was done over the phone. God, I missed her.

"She looks so young," He observed. "Like she's a baby again."

Charlie was usually a quiet guy, except in tense situations; then he'd talk. It helped him to relax. It was laughable really; in an interrogation room he was as calm as a tropical sea, but put him in a situation like this then he was about as calm as a tornado.

"D'you remember her first trip to the beach? She was more interested in jumping from the rocks than trying to collect seashells. She nearly gave me a heart attack that day."

Jake chuckled at the memory as did I, "You and me both, Dad."

That day was beautiful. She was two years old but looked five then. It was the first time we were going to spend a day at the beach. We swam in the water, made sand castles, and collected the prettiest seashells we could find. She quickly became disinterested though when she saw some boys from the res cliff jumping.

Charlie changed the subject again, "I'll never forget the smile on her face when she came back from her first day at school. She was beaming so bright she could have blinded me."

"I remember. She was so nervous that morning though she nearly backed out of wanting to go." I added.

Charlie grunted, "She wasn't so nervous when she had her first crush."

Jake growled playfully and we laughed. I was glad Charlie was here. He had a way of calming me down.

I noticed him look at Renesmee's neck. At first I thought he was looking at her scar, but then I saw him figuring her birthday necklace. Determination flashed through his eyes and he looked up at me, "She'll get through this, Bells. She is a Swan after all."

A movement from my peripheral caught my attention so I looked over. Being preoccupied clearly altered my alertness but it didn't prohibit my reflexes. I caught sight of someone standing at the door before they quickly moved away. They weren't quick enough to avoid being seen though.

Edward had been watching us.

-o0o-

It had been ten days since Victoria's attack. Ten days since the Cullen's found out about Renesmee's true origins; and ten days of having to endure Rosalie's hostility, Alice's hovering, Jake's anger, Jaspers constant scrutiny and Edward's despair. My only solace was Carlisle checking Renesmee's improvement.

Her condition was improving slowly which was a good sign, but it worried him that she hadn't woken up yet. Her temperature was now at ninety-two which wasn't considered high enough yet. Even if her temperature returned to normal, there was still a chance her body would shut down.

Charlie visited as often as he could, constantly voicing his displeasure of being in enemy territory which Jake found highly amusing. My reassurance that we would return home as soon as she woke was sought on every visit.

The Cullen's came to watch her occasionally - Edward and Esme spending the most time with her. I didn't know if they tried to speak to me or not; my attention was elsewhere. I never once left her side; I focused only on her heartbeat and any sign that she was improving. My patience, however, was wavering and more than anything I wanted to scream at Carlisle. I wanted to shout he was useless and didn't really care. I knew it wasn't true, not really, but I wanted someone to blame and take it out on, but the true culprit was still at large; the pack still unable to locate her.

Jake only left Ness' side when he absolutely had to. He'd sent the rest of his pack to hunt Victoria under Sam's command. Seth became the messenger between the pack and Jake, sending Jake's orders back to the pack. Of course, Sam took control, but he knew that this battle was also an internal one for Jake. Had Renesmee been awake, he would be leading the search for our enemy – particularly after what she did to his imprint. Sam empathised; had it been Emily he would feel the same. So instead Sam led the hunt whilst Jake stayed by Ness' side; he didn't trust leaving the house when it was full of Cullens.

Both of us were sat either side of Ness watching her and praying that she would make the slightest movement. I observed Jake lost in his own mind. Renesmee's hand was dwarfed in his as he held it. I saw him play with the charm bracelet she never took off, paying particular attention to the charm he'd given her at Christmas. I knew what it meant to him. And her. Whether I felt comfortable with it or not, I knew the dynamics of their relationship would change sooner rather than later. I knew Ness wanted to wait should anything happen until she'd finished college, but you can't help what comes naturally. They'd still take it slow; Jake respected me too much as a friend and her mom, and Ness would be worried about my reaction even though deep down she knew it would be okay. Their relationship did scare me. The imprint meant that Jake had a claim to her and eventually he would become her sole care-giver. She wouldn't need me anymore.

But I was thankful it was Jake. He would do anything for her – die for her – and that was what I wanted for my daughter. Their connection meant no heartbreak and that was one pain I wanted to spare my daughter from if I could.

I heard Jake take in a shaky breath and saw an essence of tears swimming in his eyes. He tenderly bought her hand higher and kissed the back of it before placing her placid palm against his cheek.

Morning passed quickly. Esme bought up a sandwich for Jake which he reluctantly ate, and she sat in the room for an hour allowing the silence to continue – the steady rhythm of Jake and Renesmee's heartbeats being the only sound.

Carlisle came in for a check-up and told us she was improving slowly, "She's out of the critical stage but I can't be sure of any further damage to her system or her mind until she wakes up." He informed us.

"When will she wake up, doc? It's been nearly two weeks!" Jacob growled.

Carlisle sighed, "There is no way of knowing. Based on what she is, I do have theories but there's no proof to give me credibility so I can't give you a solid answer." He looked directly at me, "I'm sorry, Bella."

"What are these theories, Carlisle?" I demanded.

He hesitated and scanned my face. He pursed his lips before relenting – something in my expression must have convinced him.

"If a vampire is hurt, it is their venom that acts as a protective barrier and a healer. Your venom is what healed her incision." He pointed out.

"Go on." I whispered.

"Renesmee isn't venomous, is she?" He asked rhetorically. He had already figured that part out.

I lowered my gaze suddenly overcome with guilt. He'd been relying on her vampire side to speed up the healing process which is why he hadn't taken it further. Yes he was treating her as a human but he knew vampires and given that Renesmee was half vampire, he didn't want to tamper with that side of the recovery.

I should have told him.

"It's okay Bella, I shouldn't have assumed." I knew he was trying to reassure me but I still held blame.

He continued, "She still has a vampire side which means she has venom it's just extremely diluted and more than likely just in her blood stream, which is why it wouldn't affect anyone if she were to bite them. At the moment, the only nutrition she is getting is through her IV which is stabilising her human side and strengthening her immune system."

He paused again.

"Currently, her vampire side is still weak which is why what little venom she has isn't helping the healing process."

"What's your point?" I asked.

"My theory is that we need to start concentrating on preserving her vampire half because the human treatment isn't enough."

Jake snapped, "Get to the point!"

"She may be thirsty."

_Of course!_ Renesmee didn't need to hunt often because human food could satisfy her survival, but she still relied on blood to keep her strong.

Jacob wasted no time. He let go of her hand, grab a scalpel from a tray (much to the protest of Carlisle) and slit a cut in his hand. He bought it to her lips and teased them open allowing a mouthful of blood to flow into her mouth before his self-healing began. When he removed his hand he held her face straight so the blood could slip down her throat instead of spilling from the corners of her lips. We stayed that way - all three of us - for over ten minutes until we were sure the blood had gone.

"Bella," Carlisle began hesitantly, "You need to hunt."

I shook my head immediately in protest but he held his ground, "When was the last time you hunted? Your eyes are black, your face is chalky...and you haven't taken a breath since Jacob cut his hand."

I didn't even realise I was not breathing. I inhaled shakily, taking in the lingering scent of blood and felt my venom pool in my mouth.

Carlisle delivered the final straw, "She'll need you to be strong when she wakes up."

The dilemma I faced bounced back and forth in my head. It wasn't until I saw the hesitancy in Jacob's eyes that I knew Carlisle was right. Jake knew I would never hurt Nessie, but clearly seeing how thirsty I was he couldn't take that risk. I nodded my head at him and stood up. I trusted Jake not to leave her alone.

I bolted out of the house without another moment's thought. I moved into the forest quickly determined to get back to my daughter as soon as possible, and to make sure there was no chance someone could catch up to me quickly if I ended up being followed.

Ice clung to the air as I ran and the clouds made the sky pure white. Snow would fall soon. The bitter cold helped me open up my thoughts – I'd completely missed the New Year. This was the worst start imaginable, my daughter so close to death. It never should have been possible. I should never have let down my guard. Victoria couldn't get away alive again and I wasn't going to sit around and wait for her to attack either, because who knew when that would be. We'd have to look over our shoulders constantly and I refused to subject my daughter to that for the rest of her life.

Thinking about Victoria made me erupt; I took it out on the first thing I came across. I snapped the deer's neck far too harshly and proceeded to suck it dry in five seconds. A bear was next. I taunted it before I killed. I never did that before but I was raring for a fight. I still felt thirsty but I had drunk enough to see me through another week or two. My thirst for blood in the metaphorical sense was far more prominent than the literal thirst. I wanted Victoria dead and I wanted it to be by my hand so I knew for sure that she would never come back. The Cullens would help – they owed me after all.

I ran as fast as I could back to the house, hoping that I hadn't been gone long and if I had, that I would return to some good news. Upon approach I slowed down, taking the steps to the door at a human pace. My aim was to walk directly to the stairs and go back to Renesmee's side, but I was stopped in the living room.

Walking through I noticed Alice, Rosalie and Edward talking in a huddle. They stopped as they saw me.

"Bella, can we talk?" Alice asked politely

I wasn't in the mood to do this again, "I have more important things to be doing, thank you."

"You can't avoid us forever, Bella," She replied, "Especially not now."

I saw her eyes flick upstairs and I knew what she meant. I walked up to her and towered over her, "I can and I will," I spat, "And as soon as my daughter wakes up we're leaving."

I turned to walk up the stairs. They just couldn't take a message. At the bottom step my arm was yanked and I was wrapped in Edward's hold.

"Stop ignoring me, Bella!" He said sternly. His grip on my arm was tight, I couldn't pull away. His eyes found mine and I could see pain. I hated it. I hated that the pain in his eyes made me feel guilty when I had nothing to feel guilty over. I hated the butterflies that erupted in my stomach because I breathed in his scent. I hated that I still loved him despite everything.

Luck saved me.

"BELLA!"

Jacob's voice ricocheted through the house. The adrenaline in his voice and the quickened beating of his heartbeat jolted me and I ran to the door of Renesmee's makeshift hospital room.

Carlisle stood behind checking her monitor but confusion marred his face. Her condition was unchanged.

I looked at Jake and saw Ness' hand pressed firmly to his cheek, both his hands clutching her tiny one. His eyes were wide and his tears were sparkling with wonder. His head turned to me briefly and I knew.

I ran to her other side, picked up her free hand a delicately placed it against my cheek. My mind was assaulted with colour; I saw through Ness' eyes as she chased after a flurry of butterflies in the forest as a young girl; a very unusual assortment of surreal imagery – Ness' usual dream world.

A sob of relief escaped me. With my other hand, I found myself fisting Ness's top as I cried into her chest. I let her thoughts override my own, completely overwhelmed that her power was working. If it was then her mind was as well - she was getting better.

* * *

><p><strong>Thank you to those of you who reviewed! It's amazing to know that you are still with me and are still loving this story! Muah!<strong>

**My next update will come at the end of May as I have end of year exams and coursework throughout the next 7 weeks :(**

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